Episode
Episode: 38 – Harmoncountry: Kansas City, KS
Description
Kansas finds itself at the center of the biggest disaster since Dorothy’s twister when Mayor Harmon and Erin McGathy conduct the worst town meeting of the tour. This episode is unedited because I have no idea what I’d cut without cutting the entire thing.
Transcript
Denver Colorado, you lucky lucky sons of pitches, you guys seem pretty nice, sorry sorry, sorry already been getting pretty gross sorry about that sorry, I thought your mama, you can’t write out the gate cuz I was thinking about the elevation here rhymes with mountain and then and then. Connection between pussy and Fountain and that makes you think about trying to weird stuff and I don’t want that kind of show I’m worried about you if it was you could do a lot of you do a lot of wrapping tonight I want you to do your little toddler dance by elevation at 5280 ft or your money back and I swear last time I was in Denver you’re worried I’m going to die cuz I’m going to be dancing around going to pass out, and the audience would be concerned you’re not are you here by yourself what’s your name, all right I really, I hate Denver Improv town they can absolutely suck it with your name sir I’ll pay them a lot of money I’ll write them a check for you going to sit there so try me and my brother, are the table now I love that and a finder’s fee, Starburst, between me, and not legally clear about it either I don’t think anybody would kill you for doing that to that song What are the names are Drew Drew Ryan Adam Adam Bryan Adam of Doom was going to make it hard for me to get out there and work the crowd and if there’s a fire we’re all going to die Steven hot beard on beard action when Spencer comes out, let’s get this beards together right now, beard on beard, the best Andrew John Steve John Jason Adam Bob and Tim, yes we need more creative parents in this world II speaking as a Dan like like like like, how about Jeffrey Brian Davis a pretty white, we have names were like yeah I mean I’ve said this before like I want you know you should have like like you should you should like for the first 11 years of your life you should just be called kid like who’s who gives a shit about you know you don’t know nothing number 8 number 9 and then it like like on your 12th birthday you should either pick your name or have everybody give you a name and it’s like if you’re not assholes you should be your name to be an asshole or if you’re like in the Eagles I can find Eagle in oh I care I just want it to be specific cuz you’re in the Eagles assholes your natural instinct there was a man sitting here alone and and put that we found out that has lots of singles here tonight but not a surprise with Mike Rowe, I’m surprised there’s not a single ladies here, I don’t know what to talk about what not to talk about it we’ll edit it out if it’s not truthful but save it for later the topic or the vodka vodka for the ladies I came here to hook up, okay so John Jake Ryan Tim’s Steve and Bob will have you guys up later, Jeff you’re back we weren’t that you’re gone for maybe after you it’s good to exercise, thank you very much I had to leave early it was weird to be away from you guys for two days I wouldn’t join the Ryan Stiles and Greg proops and Jill Marie and now the Northwest and we did three shows you guys had a day off if you guys went to the places in the world to leave the group for a two days and they are at Dave & Buster’s, we were we were in it’s possible that you may be the force that brings us to a more Exquisite places but it’s also possible that in Kansas City that the hotel was next to one of these malls were there just like a dinosaur restaurant and then stand up cover performing at and it was like Dave coulier’s there on Wednesday and JJ Walker’s there on Friday and then it said like John Davis and Dan Herman in their nationally televised podcast that you could be in the show that’s what it said, are we are we are we are safely away from from Kansas City and I are the people that came to that show the 60 Armenians in that audience I want to say I love you very much but but we will that that clubs snow has bad news it was like being in a driver’s ed class like in the back of them all it was it was not made for us was not made for our people they were the people that did show up or board were bummed out and I think it affects me I don’t know do you think I’m having a good show right now Jeff, entertainment section in the next week in Denver, the altitude jump is I can’t wrap those altitude altitude altitude we going to be a mile above sea level right now in the polar ice caps melt, could you do that you know who’s really good at wrapping a lot of people thought a professional people to get us last night, when did Spencer up here printer he’s very he’s very concerned about being put on the spot about his rapping but the truth is and everybody, the dungeon master, I don’t know if you guys are Avid podcast but there’s a semi buy tickets on that day you may recall that back in Los Angeles we were decided to bring that to work out make sure you save her and I don’t know everyone’s name but I’m going to be thought that would be impressive if I get that she up chick she’s working no she’s working the same table with Raquel Raquel doesn’t know why she’s here never met her in her life she’s just following Ricky around down there he was fired for this place 15 years ago, berserk manga you can still see her haunting other waitresses yeah there’s a photo of Dom Irrera on the wall and Maria’s in the background which is weird because Dom Irrera what was famous in the 20s, shining so I haven’t heard that one either but I don’t really know what went on I heard that you had the the basic with the shows were filled me in on the D&D campaign story structure why is there’s a thing that you put on Tumblr about the fact that you felt like as if you’re the hero of the story the fact that you haven’t changed at all right you just go right over their heads take the time to talk about it. Nothing is over the heads in Denver there a mile above sea level, if you did this really fascinating a little video on Tumblr was amazing is that you didn’t edit it and it’s really like you didn’t stutter once it was really like just like was really good and I can take it to be honest about your two days off off-planet it was great it was great let’s have some breakfast, so you’re saying that you’re going on the fact that you haven’t changed probably make you the villain possibly possibly make sure they make me like at least an extra or Spencer release this beautifully written like a Blog about like his Awakening he’s on a journey he he’s meeting the outside world is coming to grips with other people and what that means about him Spencer learned on this journey that everyone in the world could be into him no one would ever understand I’m not putting words that have that that sounds pretentious putting words in his mouth like learned I wouldn’t phrase it that way now it sounds like a dick yeah but but you you got to a point where it’s like people were throwing the equivalent of panties at you, a Wool Cap there were two dudes throwing Wilcox at you that’s as close as this crowd could get the throwing panties like this kind of the Practical crowd they if they if they have panties they’re using them hipster through his Wool Cap at you that I I don’t need this anymore I you you take it, nnnn nnnn even though that seems like a thing it’s like oh I would like that I would like to push a button and head feel what it’s like to feel everyone everyone liking me everyone appreciating me everyone accepting me and you said in your blog entry to paraphrase you to extrapolate what you were saying that that the Rival at that goal actually LED you to the realization that, there will still never be a certain connection between you and other people, you can’t be alone for the rest of your life Spencer will be right I just did fat guy and he’s the hero of this like and that makes me like Jafar, I didn’t mean to say it like Christopher Walken but Aladdin, Story Circle is the crystal ball, many people talk like this Jeff, Garrison Keillor, can we hit, I’m not talking to you either, no no no no, don’t embarrass yourself and I will appreciate the effort from you when I won’t need it but there are also times when I need to be pumped, story structure why is it be upset over this that last night with some sort of death because of the room you’re in in the the whole thing as you also found out on the tour bus driving here overnight Spencer’s a better rapper that Spencer can rap better than you yeah that’s not true, yeah yeah yeah yeah don’t turn around. Just behind you will always behind you, what’s your name isn’t Jason I fuck your mama so hard her pussy started to hasten it got really fast to fuck your mama so hard to pussy started the Glass out from the tarmac in space I’ve got your mama regardless of her race she’s she’s she’s biracial I fuck your mama it was spatial relations that I needed I put my jacket down and she heeded The Call to Adventure of my weiner she came to it said this looks cleaner than bacon put it on a plate I bought your momma Hannah cuz I’m not about hate Yelp, diversity I’m going to do another verse so that Spencer can do one that couldn’t be worse I’m going to lower the bar and talk to my people up or what’s your name Andy Steeples see how that works. It didn’t matter what I just wrapped it working the crowd going to eat your fry go to jail, turn that frown upside down Denver is going to be a huge disaster cuz I’m six foot four can I pack up but what I have for lunch because you up with ropes and chains and when we play a game do you know a lightning bolt or a fireball you better turn that frown upside down hero, Older Adult Swim of the thing with the steeple and then it said I wasn’t sure if you have to say it, open my lips what comes out as a mental fart, old, dead, I’ll take them, back on track, dungeon master and you can hear me preach the song Blaster Master Blaster I can’t think of another thing that rhymes with Pastor, I’m so sorry about my, got fired from NBC checks out on the road today, $20 a ticket don’t know why I go to have an active., Jeff oh yeah shit I didn’t know I was going to have to wrap now but I but I will because I was on the road and I tried to kill the other guy., picture of Spencer that’s right we know it’s not really a reference or just Goodfellas, hey do you miss traveling with your besties like a girls trip do you miss going a huge family gathering Viking soul food do you miss meeting and apparently I can get out well actually, no one misses that but you can still do all of these things with me Desmond Thorne on my podcast adventures in Black Cinema each week I take you on a journey through the New Black film how it relates to the culture and sometimes have the theme to like to my own life so there’s always a little tea and a slight bit of embarrassment and of course as a filmmaker my South and one of the blackest Phil nerdiest Phil married like ever you’re always in good hands, adventures in Blacksburg, but Desmond Thorne executive-produced by Amanda seales new episodes every Tuesday on all major podcast platforms, down in a second I’m very glad to have you back I thought Aaron did a great job and like Minneapolis I put up an attitude because I thought you was a very fun show warts and all it was boring and then we attack them, like I found myself like I I listen to the recording was like okay here’s the mistakes I made like this guy like piped up in the audience and instead of you be willing to come up and talk to us we don’t call anybody you hear that recovers as I get out like Fuck You Fuck potatoes, stage and then I just got mad and if I can I shut the whole thing down and axel Axel Axel Rose., I threw a camera and I put my my weiner in a shoe and, going to take the shoe and a half ago and Weiner was still in it too wasn’t disconnected, Axl Rose still held the top of the hat made my own Stretch A lot of people don’t know what I mean I just need to clarify that’s what I did I made it I made a cigar box guitar out of my own dick you just know I know but there’s a lot good 40% of people here at don’t know what that means, I made a weird Southern instrument out of my mutilated penis, Employment Security, we’re in the home stretch I feel it I feel weird Jeff I don’t know what to do it’s the altitude I understand all right. I can’t look at them, like I left for a while and it’s very strange and I came back and it was like I missed you guys and we only have a few days left and we’re going back to some of my favorite city is salty Lakes vice-versa like what you know we’ve heard it before. Just a dumb place to have salt, it’s a lake it’s going to be cold as hell they’re right, really I want to go out to the Salt Lake flats and and re-enact every Playboy video I’ve ever seen her always a playmate like a video like centerfold with would like to be naked out in the Salt Flats please cheese sticks, YouTube named Adam, we should have thought of that before you work on Tuesday, probably a few days ago but certainly has of Denver Colorado the diet just took out the goddamn window washer, do you think you gained a significant amount of weight in the street Vince Vaughn, I can’t stop myself. I came back I came back to the hotel and I ran into Destiny largely unsung I think he’s the reason why you guys get to hear this almost every night and if it’s his hard work is it good that he’s been he’s just been smashing pussy on the strip, mechanic I’m jumping into dude I pop in there just today right you look like a fucking city dump in there man there was there was no I was recuperating from this like late night party bus thing that we no matter what ever wear it were wrapped up like a guy gave us a jar of Orchard police also could or if you want to murder us, I’ll be able to talk to us a fan of ours in where were we I don’t know what Madison wasn’t it was okay thank you we were in that we were in Madison in the fan of ours who would come all the way up from somewhere south of the Chattahoochee know why he brought a jar of sound guy get a jar of black black tar and said that’s why I asked., like the beverage Brown Randy where you at, Theresa Brennan on the photo of him doing karaoke where we were and he had to hit a beat box, masturbating more, Brandon Lewis, this sounds made up but it really like like like listen to sound absolutely made up Brandon is a fourth-generation sound engineer is absolutely made up his great-great-grandfather did sound on to The Jazz Singer, but there was actually a movie before the Jessica Jessica was the first hockey but there was sound in the movie previous to that that you’re basically they had found a record of the soundtrack for Don Juan which is music at the time I haven’t actually talked was very controversial so if it sounds of a load lineage of people who has shown a pelican, if he’s lying is busted now you’re getting to know each other as a human being, when people lie I hate that word because I hate that word on the beatbox going down South Carolina, talking to do whites and now I got on Mike so let’s see how this whole and I don’t even know what else I could say he just kind of gave it to me and a half-assed way they expected me to start I don’t never know what I’m having a ball it’s a really great time on the harmontown, Spencer on the road but your mama’s so hard that she thought I was a bug he said in a room with a chandelier I gave her two balls in a dick instead hear Yo-Yo Yo-Yo guy with a beard going to do a little rap now nope nope nope nope nope nope nope nope nope dance break pills, it’s an all thank you sir thank you Brandon, assassin sound but, he’s at as a giant with a booming voice that has a gray poop the big bucks and he captures, like no there will be no clipping it will now that we know plosives, my grandpa the guy that invented the Dixie cup and a string, how do we how do we how do we make people love each other, turn the lights down real low, I think you do what you do is be honest you are you expose yourself and then that allows other people to release themselves without their two, alternate pitch, Sports Corner, local sports team statistics, that’s a record., Hey Dan Denver Colorado or you know if there’s ever been an altar to the to the grace that is the America’s favorite sport is it is it is Mile High Stadium you can feel the fans are you can feel that they’re getting what they want wanting what they get you can you can send stuff even when the place is empty I go down there with my daughter every every every every every every every every fall and I ice it and I am the god Built For This sport, in this sport alone what do you think is the most important role on on the Colorado Rockies the most important position on the Rockies it definitely they did the top position like that player, two players, Perry Tyler Perry Tyler was on top now after last night I think the Rockies are in the downslide but that can be a precursor to an upswing I’ve I believe that if my grandpa used to say in Oklahoma back when we used to watch the Nuggets go home Oklahoma, I’m from Wisconsin Jeff where grandpa’s are known as Uncle homos, it’s like a Mima or Agoura pop pop Wheaton Wisconsin we called our Grandpa’s Uncle homos my eye is what sport do the Rockies play, America’s favorite, would you, they play football basketball Sports guy has got to get out there at like front and center or the Rockies are going to take it, are you saying that the Denver Nuggets doing so freely at the Colorado Rockies might move in on there I got a second sure she reformat a 7-10 split would you go to All Stars when you come down to the single individuals then what we’re talking about as a potential Over the Rockies in the spring semester or or are you know, they agree they see me I mean is the lockouts going to end,2010, yardage, I can’t tell the difference between Grey Goose and kettle on but I can’t tell it was Rooster Rock, snap Frost vodka the venue doesn’t have any kids, you know it breaks my heart jumps when the kids don’t know their vodka 21 + 18 + 21 or whatever they are things up after the show every once in awhile like two people my age will come up to me and go or daughter Ariel she’s 16 she’s not a mermaid., and are you guys, do you want to cut another fight yeah I’m sorry I picked that name but but but she can’t she can’t come tonight and I only way we came and then I got the details or two to read and bouncy and volleyball practice, add to my point Jeff is that some type of every once in awhile I can do it every every third City like a set of parents will come up to me one more parents who aren’t even fans of the show don’t even care to sit for 2 hours listen to be talking about Jackson bald and unwrapping in Dungeons & Dragons and they’re only here like 4 just to to get like a signature for they’re underage child really really like bums me out, that’s fucked up best kid in the world I don’t know what do you do their job what do you do you sing a song, no no I’m kidding I think you sing a song Elite novel cheesesteaks it doesn’t matter, thank you thank you Ariel, I’m going to die, you’re not putting up much of a fight, I’m going to die Jeff there was 18 pizza boxes in that room today, Kansas City with a flute, I got to get back on my diet. Ackroyd I’m going to be Ackroyd by Portland he got pretty large Acura got got inexplicably large how weird it is., I told you guys I somehow I can after after after party ended up at Dan aykroyd’s house he was as big as a poor person’s house but fortunately he had a huge mansion houses for people living in him, what are version of Ghostbusters shirt out and about in a pizza came out, but I said that guy you know I’d be a bad friend if I didn’t tell you that like my best friend is in Ghostbusters one of the best movies of all time and he was like all night long was pretty cool I’m sorry we made fun of how bad it is, if he’s listening, big trouble I didn’t see big trouble trouble as though that was a good guy, he was he was very very big I think he’s lost weight since then right I don’t know, yeah he’s Canadian he’s Beyond in sync way to go Harmon the current reference, on the top of the charts of Pop-Tarts by Norah Jones, text Tyler Tyler Perry, Tyler Perry’s Velvet Revolver, I just got to be a band that Tyler Perry owns right he’s Tyler Perry Tyler Perry bunch a bunch I met her in the bar before we came up here have a drink it’s the cheese steaks in the altitude I’m sorry, here is a Jay Jay from Vienna hair Lavinia Slovenia point where is jjjjjj can you make it to the stage she’s got to be the one that drove the farthest she’s from Europe, the specials, she’s from a different land, on the mountain Jay Jay are you independently wealthy how do you how can you afford to keep flying out here, we’re like for real like for real we have ayahuasca, oh everyone just leave the keys in the cheese basket, he’s in a deep fried cheese basket I’m I’m with I’m with I’m with Dave I’m with Tony three women here, what are you do, British Embassy in Vienna stupid comedy shows like ours, I think it was a friend from out of the, how many languages do you speak, which would or are they English German and French, what is the number to where you are partly hurry, I don’t know if I’ve ever heard Slovenian, play come on down to harmontown turn that frown upside down he is yellow poop, hook in Slovenia, alright International UK Lady Gaga yo yo yo International I’m with the irrational I’m in a rational National Chris Rock drops the mic Chris Tucker’s another person the race is a like that make me racist I didn’t confuse them I love black people think of me, yo foreign language to English International whole planet going both local got your Mama’s cell phone and your titties are mobile got you on my Sprint I’m going to put it in your PC, rap and more, funny funny but has pictures of people you never seem ridiculous and smoking weed for free German, International Wings menu, I put a shoe I put a shoe on her head and said how do you do I went I went to eat through it., I’m feeling tense I need some massage I fucked your mama in the Hampton Hill garage Spencer’s going to come to the bank I’m going to hand it off cuz you like yo I got monsters in a cage and everybody sees me cuz I’m all the rage and I don’t mean raised like a barbarian rage let me get off this Ryan let me turn the page. Let me see if I can fry them or maybe I’ll just sit up here and Fry I think that’s all I got right now but we’ll go to the tourist, download the previous song, it runs that way is this, nobody knows what any words mean we don’t we all say what we say and then we see what we mean I’m a ride with me with me I don’t want to be fat that want to be dead and I don’t want to get for the tickets that I just want to Ghostbusters who you going to call I’m going to call Jenny Craig, hey Google show me DJ Jay, get away from me, but is it is it DND time I leave, I think we sharing a mic, Denver Style, is the altitude there’s electricity doesn’t get through, McCords is fast, oh thanks, Tanner, you’re backstage watching Gator Boys right, I got a drink but I’ve just been sitting on the chair but it’s okay everybody we should find you a stool or here you sit on this one weird, it’s only we have to share Mike will edit this part out where I’m talking about the mic that we have to share but then I won’t hit it out, Charmed, great I spent the day cuz I missed a bit so I catch me up if you would, last time we met in our heroes have been journeying in the belly of the Beast the mysterious and mythical and finna fish after he found what looked like a lung the group rejoined through large cavity that core cat slashed in the sight of the great Oregon entering the lug a slimy creature and dropped in from the ceiling onto the bottom of this chamber followed by several electrical spider him in after the death of combat it’s settled Sharpie pork and moellring were victorious hoping to damage the one with the smoke from their smoke sticks Sharpie and more and ignited them as well as all their torches and is the damage was being dealt to the vicious London Court destroyed the remnants with his flaming sword and together they all fell below back into the chamber before they left, yeah they had made some progress but where would they proceed from here, thank you Spencer all right so don LaFontaine elevator pick a fight with Spencer and I need I need for my documentary that I’m producing about myself I needed death to happen I need I need a conflict, maybe you’ll die in this in this round of a DND yeah yeah, I was joking honey I was joking, cheesesteak on his face for the, you got on your eyelashes, where is cracked up wow we have a problem sir, Jager Bomb, Heritage table of enabler, I can help, anybody have heard of Pulp Fiction at Renwood syringes of implosion 200 meter at Ranch in your ears and open the door and you were standing there I was scared because I knew it was pretty fucking dumping a lamb, it is certainly a drunk at all, don’t let him hurt you, don’t make your stomach hurt your gear movie aren’t death of actual death, it’s going to be a long ride in the bus today only one thing is going to make me feel better, order me an ice cream dancers come out, okay so joke why did you eat ice cream could be the show these people love me no matter what I do, love me I created, Crown Staffing, it has become a thing of violent thing against I thought you put the music down to Toby Keith’s I Love This Bar and Grill across the way, yeah those are just at the healthy zucchini with the pride of the wrench I hope he keeps paid in on me loving something with your dad I love peanut butter and jelly sandwiches good let’s go to a bar tonight Toby Keith hubris as you respond when I can’t lose three people in there it was really sure that they use to make the drywall at the bars made out of make like look like wood, ask the bartender said what because I don’t know they just pick at it here to do it I don’t know I didn’t think the tires of Swing they think, sticker for a berry that’s why they’ve been breaking the windows on your car’s oil or at our it’s grown over there Man Group nothing more there’s that there’s a there’s a lot of pictures of it, hey., Toby Keith, what’s your last name, W I think you know more about Toby Keith and I dude do you think like if he was to walk into that bar the same way that we want to keep talking as their country song on the iPad can you just sing a song about Toby Toby Toby Keith commercial for dick ass fucking plants that is hotter in here I’m going to put a flag on everything you I bad, everybody agreed you have agreed I love this podcast agreed to be the the name behind this bar and I we we have asked you for months and months what shall we name This Bar and Grill now I know you do, okay I don’t know them real troops or half off, all right Jared has an eye for believing so we’re just going to let you know if Buffalo chose, the truth because it’s really really hard toward the pocket troops that everybody’s supposed to fucking kid wheel of the churches go doing doing the greatest shity as hard as they do it with great Valor, but but if I get one more order potato skins, do a do a troop by troop by troop a troop F state troopers 1847 up, half price appetizers your mom, how far is absolutely empty across the street and that gives me a fucking thrilled to see that what else is going to get a blast, where are they, my brother has an Irish gay, I was going to say it’s not really I’m also being a hypocrite it’s not a chance to say Fuck You Toby Keith., going to write what you know man so silly Keith Toby Keith Red right when he knows we went with me now I’m sure he’s a great person, all right let’s just proceed back out of the only Garth Brooks swinging around in a wire and I thought that was cool, he takes his job seriously he’s swinging around your in a large circular room the walls drip with a green mucus in it, the laminate is picked off the walls the appetizers are supportive of the troops and air of silence and miss you could hang they were this area, this salt and pepper shakers are hand grenades the bathroom, I say really quickly before I forget at dungeon master Spencer and I will be selling merch in that corner after the show anything I’ll sign it also I’ll sign anything if you don’t buy anything else, I’m not going to tell sign it Toby Keith if you if you bring me a kidnapped baby I’ll sign it Toby Keith as a way of getting back at him for holding the nation hostage a song of his what what song did you see if anybody know Toby Keith song, Red Solo Cup I want to fucking cock, yeah wow clever, gray that song of red Red Solo Cup can I get I don’t know it’s a guy that has a solo red party the girl left the Reds okay not too bad it’s not even that complex has literally like Hey we’re all at a party and we all have red Solo cups pocket it’s so heartbreaking, anywhere I got a thin plastic red vessel and I’m catering to Fat Boys the end, let’s shoot some deer, mensur I mean I don’t mind it’s fine, all right well my describe the room you were in, thing on speaker, how many feet are 80 minutes, that’s how passive it is you guys barely beat up the lungs right up the middle and Lorraine to the right and then you magically decided to go back to where Sharpie was you know so you’re in that room obvious exits north south and east and west will take you back to the village where we not been before you you’ve been through all of them but you guys just caught back up with Sharpie when you thought he was in love with these hanging out what’s up guys I’m Palace in the sword guy, your husband let’s go back to him for a long dark let’s not go to that one so I mean I just got the kidneys right I can’t tell you rushing headlong through the passageway you find yourself in a large pinkish room which I’m about to explain this passage has a high ceiling from which is hanging a large shiny vein looking sack of Flesh in the shape of a kidney bean several arteries run from various walls into the dangling organ the huge Central Court seems to be its main support coming in from the ceiling you can see what appeared to be a large white blue Sparks with multiple limbs slowly crawling around the surface of the Oregon a greenish tangle of cords appears to be blocking the only other exit, don’t untie us fighter things that repair everything and also will attack us if we start fucking around and I mean response or something yeah but that court I don’t know if you remember but my far swords all used up you just forgot, I am she’s my arrows I showed them to remember a single a good Arrow, at the thing at the kidney bean, you miss by the way there was a dude did you talk to the dude who brought he made props he made he made up he made a molar a narrow took Double Double Arrow, you coming up Amanda thing, what do they plan to make little props and he made, listen, but she fires two arrows so I’m going to head to the arrows are four-sided dies dangerous of all Dice and you also made what I thought was a joke about putting a Sharpie in my butt to hit it one time but it’s made out of Sharpies that does Ray of frost way better than rare for all right thank you it was at Luke thank you Liz, I Sky cast a spell over and thanking him I jump onto Sharpie shoulders and take out my flaming sword and take a swipe at the underbelly of the kidney flashing at the underbelly you score a flaming head just as soon as the gas has been made however those spidery creatures I was mentioning earlier crawl over the surface of the organs we probably, yeah like AIDS, do you want us to give you a fan of shades, I I don’t have a dime, do I have a spell that would work on organisms like that like we are keeping a tent images of Oregon, try some buy some sort of like I should clarify you don’t have the power to summon things just talked to them so if there’s a squirrel around your life animals, suspiciously all aids-related written animals are absent, how convenient maybe they’re out of support group, I’m sorry, oh that’s okay thanks have brothers I would like to shoot two arrows at the stem connecting the kidney and the arrow santacaligon the Viera movie Rose Fashion, cute really cool 20 damage, all right that’s like a million and that you noticed one of the Sparks goes to begin repairing the Oregon the other three drop to the ground and begin hovering towards thee with Menace I throw a throwing knife at the park trying to repair the wound as you throw your throwing knife you feel great shock of electricity flowing through your body and let’s see if you can still hit under this increase drag and perhaps, you’re nice plant itself right in the back of the spidery creature and it takes, that’s a lot for a spider right at the same time is this not bad for spider, at the same time the electric poles I mentioned earlier coursing through your system deals a damage to you you feel quite a quite a jolt it by that there you go scorching, app at 1, what were you shooting at the stem connected to the kidney stem you miss, the scorching Ray flies into the wall and immediately blackens the surface quickly grew regenerates back to its former glory I climbed right up in the right up in the thing, ready for the write-up in the kidneys have but there’s a crease somewhere were considering a kidney for the purposes of this exercise, a burst of brilliant green light flows out the kidneys starts glowing with an intense bright light in its not long before shimmering bit reserved light or blasting out of the surface of the kidney you can see all the spiders are frantically trying to heal what damage is being done but at the same time they can’t keep up soon you’re covered in a shower of giblets has this kid needs., giblet show Toby Keith two plus hours and Grill, 231 Jupiter Jones are happening at the back of the bar in front of the bar you can peel off the lacquer and eat it, dance is coming up you hoochie coochie till you Smoochy we’re going to play footage of the test, all right so how do we get to kill this thing I just pray we’re just going to, the organ is exploding but your actions of pissed off those things I was talking about and they shoot lightning towards you a suit to sleep arrows for the, well lightning damage everyone, Panther are we okay I don’t know how much HP do you have, how much more do I have HP that sing that tracks how dead you are, I should really teach you guys how to play this at some point damn well now you have 15, hey Hunter I thought we were friends at 8 to start spinning is faster and faster and faster in a punch myself with my foot my sword attack into the thing and try to take out as many as Lightning spiders as I can move, in a call that an advanced cleave action, I could have said I could have told you I would I want to do an ACA but these, I like your pollen head shake, thanks Aaron., Swinging your sword in the circular far at, you strike the first spider, lowering your bill, cha cha, you only managed to deal 8 to the spider but as it was already wounded from your earlier dagger it falls to the ground and dissipates into white energy kidneys already exploded, I was in Charlotte’s Web you now, assess, I put it at Moraine Stern, all right you’re up to do a thing, I like Magnus take two of my Viaero, you pick the best of three identical enemies to fire out, and firing two arrows yeah those are the ones were fighting, firing them directly at the lightning creatures both of your arrows make their Mark ceiling, lemon damage of peace, Miss Spider there would be a nice cuddle up the ceiling and dissipating the ceiling, who won Dallas and types of he’s like yeah I make sandwiches out of the shit man I’ll take a hell yeah let me get my bread of holding, is just regular bread versus regular bread delicious, it’s it’s spice Ali effective, all right well that’s good seems like a hanger, where 2/3, come see us at the merch table we have a limited amount of time yeah I would work like perfectly for, I think before everyone everyone dies everyone needs to have a podcast where they tell people they put something in their butt and then have people come to the show with things that they put in their butt and give it to him by then, it’s just a wonderful God damn dream that I’m living 40 I came across the country at crowd-surfed in Brooklyn and now we’re at the top of the country the top of it looking down through the clouds where the highest point in the country, ice cap capital stretching for a for a record, you know what I like that it’s a relief to be an in a city where is the biggest city and of the capital like that well tonight we’re kind of doing her own thing up here we’re going to fix that right now cuz I haven’t certain about it what’s your name my name is Keller is that why there’s a funny story about that I was at a party with someone from Switzerland, yeah like you know that means basement right basement like seller underground shameful, it’s a sad sad sad sad creepy skeevy, what happened what happened you that Midway where you having a bad day about, really nice weather it is in January, I don’t understand why you’re worried about global warming is that the weather is weird that’s why are you here are you a scientist 65 little things like that little things like that bother you like what, please play Lady over here because she’s been very vocal, what is your name is, Lexi what does that mean in Swiss friend, and that’s why I’m upset, all right come on guys what it what what what OK Google poetry major your name is Keller Keller Keller Keller and it’s warm outside, Lexi, it’s basically my my issue is I not that I lack Direction, I don’t everybody I’m sorry I’m sorry audience, okay I do I do the same thing you’re doing for a 90 minutes at the age and I charged them $20, creative writing, play Heaven forfend, I want to tell stories to people for a living. I have no idea how to go about that we’re going to help you with that right now, tell her if we’re going to give you the gift of Storytelling, yeah we’re gonna make this very quick right now where we can all get along well, all right tell her so so so let’s see here you’re struggling with how to tell the story and didn’t like what like kind of a Masterwork that you’re supposed to produce for your class or what are you doing, more people need to admit that really I am coming from the world of comics, so I want to do that but he’s in the good place, Somerset Park Fort Collins, let me come the fuck down, holyshit, take it easy Lexie like we said who had a terrible day Keller raised his hand I think I take it where did you drive here from with Alexa, a conversation with you into a hilarious improvised bit on the table if you want to write Comics you’re bad at drawing you you and you’re looking for a story so good that it would make a great comic book right always okay alright so what’s your favorite thing ever, bananas okay to addict, and your and your favorite movie, he’s a con artist looking for the perfect his name means seller and here is his biopic give you everything you possibly could want but it comes at a price, I just need $2, all right all right I’m going back to my basement where I live, Keller I named you basement so you would know, Ellen, I got to try to draw the comic book, lucky I didn’t know you were down here I’m trying to talk, you insinuate yourself into my life, 35 seconds of meeting them, what’s a banana., It is good story material I hate to be foolish but I’ve never had a better idea maybe I could stop, are you dying it’s the best thing that’s ever happened to you, set a reminder 3 months later at Comic-Con so you see my ID is indistinguishable accent and I can’t stream and part Asperger’s, I’m hoping that you will buy this the Stanley, I like it kid, thank you, what are the colors movie Killer story, Keller’s Keller’s Keller’s biopic that was entitled the final panel truck that weird Swedish film, no one gives a shit about all right for once in your life, American that’s right that’s right whether fux with you cuz it’s normal, do your ears separating yourself from from from everything normal, I hate when I like to wear suits I like the chilly weather like I like sweater weather now it’s getting hot again so you screwed right that’s what you’re saying, all right poetry Majors was just end up all dead at the end, spell pepper a little ham, Denver is the altitude in Little Italy, hi Hyman I think it’s time to bring the train back right into the state and talk about what we learned, so sad I don’t want to leave I don’t want to leave here either way I’m on the bus right after we leave because they drink for a little bit but we’re leaving at 2 a.m., hide your cheese sticks everybody, when your city is high you just broke down, Dakota Harvest wagon, we play in Dungeons & Dragons, I went to Denver and I found my heart, I’m hoping that if I keep walking trail behind, that’s how it goes when I hope the altitude, I’m sorry, I should be singing about Hearts I should be singing about armlets and collect waxer and schooling and whatever your names are weird hipsters are what about Dave and it has cheese steaks and Kelsey and her and her and her type I’m not making shit up, your great City you’re the best city in the entire country., Midtown, how do you spell bikini, Murphy is yellow and brown, going to get my riding out of here and see but I’m glad, God dammit, Frozen Play-Doh videos, Bridget, does my new have her paragraph is the name of the place is like the highest ratio fun you’ll ever have