Episode
Episode: 292 – LIVE from The Wilbur in Boston 2018
Description
Live from the Wilbur in Boston, MA. Special guest Aaron Mahnke from the Lore podcast. Featuring Dan Harmon, Jeff Bryan Davis, Spencer Crittenden, Rob Schrab, Aaron Mahnke and Steve Levy.
Transcript
Athena district is Boston Massachusetts
one of my favorite theaters in the United States are beautiful Wilbur Theater here
I’m very very excited to announce
my favorite words of all time Tournament down is now in session
Spencer Crittenden
oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah
how to find out the mayor of harmontown give it up again harness
Boston
goodness
wow
honey have Cabaret style seating this is wonderful what a great theater this is a really nice I thought we had a one person standing ovation but that was the cocktail waitress down there the most receptions you’ve ever gotten take you
thank you thank you I you know I was very you know is that we haven’t been in front of an audience in a while and then to come out come out come out here only if you do this last 3 weeks in Los Angeles we’ve been farting around and getting our sea legs back that this is this is nice and I’m probably a little nervous cuz I thought I wrote you guys a song cuz I wanted to get on your good side
the guy don’t want to have that privilege where I can just do not know the thousand people and they paid what you guys pay too much in class down it’s always too much right as it was everything’s too much I got I got I got toilets for sale in but I didn’t want to have you plunging nor is that about occupation is I think it’s going to make some
talk to me it’s all drudgery just I sit in the Zeppelin like thinking Fox for money so that 10 migrant workers then like just type the thoughts for me and I love all of them more than any any Republican
I would I would sell you out America
if you’re an unemployed welder has been replaced by a robot you’re right I’m a coastal Elite I hate you more than the people were bringing in over the Border I’d love them cuz they pick my strawberries I would trade you for anything it’s all about extreme that the war between whether or not we’re going to just let everyone flat in and see each other alive or whether we have to have a fucking baby schwitzer and it blew through whatever connection or whatever philosophical loyalty or actual familial connection feel a fence at the now everyday may be glib comparison 2/3 rakishness but I got to say you look I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again when it comes to comparing you to Hitler I like to jump the
I like to get way up early and I just think the worst thing that happens to you is your apologist and that compared to Hitler too early and you should learn to live with that all politicians should be able to survive being compared to Hitler it’s not that hard a litmus test
did you have a hard day honey yeah it was hard what happened some of the people compared me to Hitler did you act like Hitler and any perceivable way or am I a healthcare bill is a little Draconian okay but yeah okay so get over it go to bed sleep like a non Hitler baby
now run that flow chart for today’s reality compared to Hitler
crack into a cold baby shower
the Press wants to get in
that’s for sure I’m in the face
yeah they’re trying to get in but they won’t they won’t wait the two weeks or honey why do you need two weeks to let people in to see the kids what are you doing that takes two weeks to change about you’re either a room full of babies that deserve to be behind a beautiful clean comfortable chain link fence that I’m not at all saying is inhumane Raymond knows which everyone is the tries to get in no matter what like there’s there’s there’s a Buckboard way to try to get in and if you don’t you’re a criminal and ends of your criminal and there’s like a baby blanket you’re a split on a Buck Rogers space blanket get your butt tonight
a lot of these babies are dangerous political dissidents and intellectuals do you know that
should be a face value think I understand that you need the baby’s locked up so I will now where do we go when we get into the program can I come take a look at them maybe in 2 weeks
what
cause for alarm way more time than my landlord has to wait before he opens my fucking door and comes in and looks at my bong and like
really when I lived in an apartment I was like I could yell at the landlord if you like tried to get in
can you do it 30 hours Boston song everybody needs a trillion times and if you’re if you’re having passionate feelings and I don’t even care if you’re wrong like if you’re passionate feelings are wrong like look I know I live in a bubble I’m coming from Lau people are my host you being gracious to me rolling on a red carpet you’re feeding your food you’re if you’re putting me up in your hotel I mean that you are your taxes pay for that hotel
your interview I am a guest here so I would just want to thank you did not intend to go off about this thing that everyone’s talking about and if you are there’s a thousand people here are a couple of you that have like feelings that I’m rubbing up against with my liberal claptrap and and I and I want to thank thank you for thank you for thank you for zipping it is what I was going to say
but I know I really appreciate that I don’t lie cuz I don’t want to start a fucking show with me though I want to reward your patience in your silence in your well hopefully not your total silence but maybe your intermittent you know what I could go for right now then a song a song and the smooth Taste of an ice cold Baby Swiss
the low carb beer and a with a nipple on it trying to babysit slime
check into the room temperature today
that rewards you like a good Mama after a hard day and The Rock Yard baby Schmitz
yeah I would have liked. Not GarageBand or somebody would have been a disaster as it is a cappella I don’t know and I’m not really a singer or musician but a lot of research for the cities I go to
I died. I know the typewriter was invented here that’s it
Boston Massachusetts usage on the Boston Bay
and the TU tossed into it’s made the British go away
your buildings and your streets are famous so is all your food
but here’s what I’ve learned will walking from the lobby to my room you might be alcoholics Boston
and I don’t throw that word around
you maybe have a problem Boston and that makes you my kind of town
Boston Massachusetts YouTube song the Boston Mall
and you
be the cutest of them all
now you’re on my side for I got you for an hour and a half I could do whatever now I got to fart in a shoe
I spent a lot of spent most of the afternoon today afternoon today just hanging out by the Boston Bay was so nice out that
going to drop her that they got the Baby Gap
when he was working on Thriller with the Button Gwinnett
I was having some pizza but nobody called the North End of the North End yeah that’s like numbers 3 on Yelp skinny house
famous for being a skinny house that’s it
other units been there forever what is it done for anyone lately
the Paul Revere statue like spit out burgers in a few
it’s there to keep the Redcoats away it’s doing its job yeah we take it for granted a little bit but it’s kind of a gargoyle
I thought it was a vegan restaurant with skinny house you can’t even get out but seriously there is it now
skewed when I have my first my first few times I was in New York I was working as a writer and all I saw was Times Square of staying at a hotel and I’m I telling everybody on New York’s like this and it’s like there’s hot dogs all over the place and vomit
I’ll know I don’t like New York and then my friend took me in like he’s like now there’s like you know you got to go below a hundred and 5th and whatever the fuck
Boston is limited to a hotel lobby but I will say I think I think it’s safe to say there is a broader definition of when you’re supposed to call the police
like
write on a on a on a man that that they wait a second or shows being interrupted
it’s probably crawling onto the stage wearing an outfit or costume it’s hard to explain
Target Blaine
craft Rob everybody
thank you
thank you
I bet you thought I was a dog
I thought you were Co I thought you were doing like a little sealed with that Sea Dog of the ocean
the first rule of Cedar always make an entrance
he doesn’t like being he doesn’t like waiting to be brought out before we start the show Rob was like brainstorming stage work and stuff like I saw him pulling various props off the wall and he was like trying to use chairs is still toe is really watching a master honing his craft and to see that that resulted in the results it did it was a truly just wonderful sound like this is only
the first part of it yeah
who wrote promises more costume changes tonight than Dolly Parton
done with no back
drop everybody
our next guest
anyways I mean I’m just saying that I’ve been in my hotel I have seen or heard a lot of grown men
it’s going to hurt himself
please come help
discontinue if he’s going to keep going
part and I’ll do my part
did you get even with us up stages
you don’t up stages
you know they saying if you get on the airplanes Wi-Fi that’s how you get hacked
and then he’s arrived at the hotel this morning in the in the lobby
you know if you get on the hotel. Have you heard that they’re cutting people ankles in the grocery store parking lot I’ll forward you an email about it because I’m 70
she’s a very prudent cautious man in real life he doesn’t like to
I got
very sensitive
I feel like I’m rolling with a lot of punches you’re doing great
unlike other people I don’t need that thrive on that and I’ll I will learn that you don’t think I was would be doing that in my living room by myself
crawling around with a Wookie jacket
flew you out here man I know
and he found out he was coaching he had a meltdown
that’s not true the first five during the show the last time
remember your boss maybe did on his way to a Ceramics seminar
because he’s so you can figure out your labor you’d be okay with me sitting in the back of the plane while you’re up there with your no I wouldn’t feel okay cuz it could because I have empathy and I treat people with respect and I don’t I don’t Trump all over their shows and you know and then and then and then and then I respect and support them
so anyways my I was just I was going to say is this is a lot of drunk people here it’s the fact that it’s like a all-ages affair like I like guys that just look like like a friend of my dads like
I like lately we were out last night and there was a guy 57 years old 54 and came out of the tools and people moving and people serving drinks I would get on my knees and say take me to jail
but this is not good but this is the he was so excited about it then it’s four separate Boston from drunks that I see in Los Angeles this is the look on that guy’s face as he was barely making
very happy about it is that it’s a friendly town
I think I got to take that’s the key to that cuz I was going to say in New York and now I like I’ve been I both like New York and I like I’ve been with drunk people all the way up to Andy Dick levels of actual Andy Dick and like there’s that but even if you’re not and you dick in your famous and you have this like like tagging your house at Lake Lake New York bouncers will be like Dill is very impressive the way that they like even the guy who like a functional alcoholic but you can he’s in that dark pocket of the night like any just like he’s he’s pulling it off with his friends but the bouncer be like nope bartender not you you won’t look me in the eye like it’s very empathic sentimental hierarchy there it’s like they say but I do think that I mean here there’s like a support of the which reminds me of Milwaukee
what was happening to him because because the bartender was probably after we left at front of that Kevin you want another one and he was like
yeah she probably put out a rope ladder for him to get to the bar and he said and he said
Kevin you can be
if you just dream had enough
you’re waiting for me to rush it you’re waiting for me to do the
read my Australian tour
I am a man of a thousand dialects what’s what do you they’re liking that at mate they’re liking that happening now in a full hardcore Southie Boston
for which I think he lived here for a while and he said at the Sperry theater there was a Blue Man Group show and there was a commercial for it on TV in the 90s that he told me about he’s like all you’re going to do for the Blue Man Group at the Wilbur Theater in the 90s and Blue Man Group in there was one of those things where they do the theatrical testimonials like the audience people are like like the Everyman Joe is like that guy come see the shower was great and I’m trying to find the quote he told me there’s two balconies
Rob Rob Rob that’s called a balcony going to die Bobby one of those testimonials
great Gregg karukas on Junkie
yeah I got pulled over in Delaware once by a cop and I could I was my first time talking to anyone from that region at all and I was I was I was going through this horrible experience it as like I felt like another man’s coming down on me and it’s like but also he stays like a cartoon
show me the TV show but then people were I’m probably too if you tell him how we are exactly where we confront people know that’s Fargo that’s not real that is real that we talked like that in Milwaukee I have just dropped that accent in support of a professional career I no longer speak like a Philistine
I talk like Tom Brokaw
all the time I have no nasal twang
I lost the song The Lost are you guys are losing faith in me
no we’re not. We love you okay
Tony Danza what he had to do
I’m sorry you want me to be uncomfortable okay would you rather I be uncomfortable cuz if I show
Swan Point it at the harmontown spring-trap a car ride from the whole ride from dance class to LAX takes about let’s call it 40 minutes
that’s fair that’s very fair
free posters like coming this summer but but like like like like bus stop signs that have movie posters and stuff like a okay what a movie poster is
now we can get now we can start okay okay I don’t know if you guys heard about this but a couple of months ago and I think it’s
in theaters there was this movie called Peter Rabbit and it’s about him yeah
and it’s about a of the movie with a bunch of computer-generated rabbits in it one of them named Dina
I know it’s about time
I haven’t seen this movie I’m sure it’s fine and I’m sure the people worked really hard on it
what the advertisers there’s a poster that says and I go through this every time one of these movies comes out it says there’s a picture of Peter Rabbit no pants shirt going like this
in front of a blue void and then it says in big block letters better eight than never
a t e better late than never
Frank what the fuck is that mean
what the fuck is that mean
is this is this a sequel to a movie that he ate something in his this is this something that we’ve been waiting for the Peter Rabbit movie Paddington 2 where is Peter Rabbit God damn it better late than never good wait a minute why you ain’t tell ya like Peter Peter Peter eater you know better better stomach is flat is washboard
is he holding a carrot and I do not know carrot no stump carrots knows nothing not a pile of parrots is there an empty plate and never this happens all the time remember the fucking Peabody movie The Dog movie Sherman & Peabody you know this the dog father of all comedy
Sherman and Peabody it’s about a talking dog who gets a pet boy who travels in time not to Mom time
dinosaurs Abe Lincoln Napoleon not to Mom times and it’s the dogfather of all that you know that thing when we go well you know it’s the mother of all comedy and then it’s the you know The Sisterhood of all, that’s a very common thing to say but I guess I guess dog and God rhyme no they don’t
the dogfather of all comedies better late than never
look for it it’ll piss you off you’ll be driving down the street you’re both rabbit 8 I guess all animals eat
and this one
must have ate something and he’s happy about it and I should go see this movie because of why because it’s better than never
never can come soon enough
because that’s when I’m going to see your movie Jesus tomb
better late than never get the fuck out of here with that get the fuck out of here with that I got to pick the kids up at it’s going to be a parking lot why don’t we just never okay send it but it out I got to get home I got to get home there’s a water bug guy is delivering today if I don’t if I don’t know but you’re driving by maybe I’ll see if I should just take custody weekend is coming
they should just say drop your kids off they’ll be relatively safe for 2 hours probably not when did when did when was rhyming such an important movie taglines long long ago in a galaxy far far away does it rhyme with anything you know right I can hear you scream no rhyming involve now everything is like bitter up.
leaving leaving what was the Yogi Bear one
great things come in bears
ansar Gallery Boston quick I can see why that that counts as your heart It Feels Like A Very Brady how do you like them apples
that’s why I like a great things coming Fast Company
I hope
I hope it’s another bear a Great Bear I think it’s moving them that’s why I bought a zoo
goody goody by using those guys mixed up
I’m going to accept that Crone I might have gone over the line
I might have accidentally asked you to trivialize pedophilia in your mind
it’s good to find your boundaries Boston the elevator singing and breathing out of ears they’re so drunk and they’re like like clapping their hands randomly thinking it was at a nice hotel and we stupidly chose to stay way up top on the top floor like Fast and Furious looking dudes like a lot of big giant like very tanned biceps in a lot of big fake titties and is it in until I get to stop at every stop on the way down and it’s a lot of cologne is a potpourri of muscle perfumes over everybody’s lovely and nice and like no one was a jerk and just one guy gets there and he’s you know he’s like probably my age but because he looks a little older and a really big
at least he doesn’t turn around and face the door he just cuz we rammed in there he’s got his back to the door
it was this coming tax an elevator has anybody got any Coke they got the guy that gets on the bus or the tram or the you know what a smile on your face like we’re not at the fucking aptitude to
to be jocular we’re just
Transit we’re having a bad day I wear my drone business I got it
people on these things
we weren’t prepared for that how’s that sound we were prepared for your Open Mic at the door open and it wasn’t really room for three people but three people are waiting to get on like to halfway down and any cuz you guys are you guys off
people nervous laugh and then they take the way we got them in Burbank we got him and we got to make it work
Huey Lewis song is Boston mentioned in the Huey Lewis song that or is it or is it
local radio stations in a version of that song and then he would like I think Huey Lewis like said all 70,000 American cities and then they would put it in as I was like during the like the extended Dance Mix you guys are too young to be having a live at a time when there was radio let alone when radio was so unaccountable that mixes were being played from the earth have a god like you were driving to work at your Sundial plant and
hey you to prepare your Bronto burgers and
because you lived in Milwaukee and I’m assuming that he would have it somewhere else
how high is the pay range thing catching on payrange have you heard of this one person that’s awesome
fucking weep I was so sad last night because I’m in a hotel as I threw the room service is bad in the past 11 which I don’t understand like if I if I’m if I’m in a why would you why would you stop having people make food for people in a hotel after 11 when if I wanted food before 11 I wouldn’t eat at a hotel I don’t know where that doesn’t make any sense why are you doing I’m drunk and dangerous like flick well me or face the fucking urban legends that will befall you as I can do anything I want to this weird hipster Colonial art
I can hold this up and put it in my duffle bag I like Paul Revere I’m going to
I’ve I’ve I’ve done unbroken shit lately I’m entering a dark chapter of my life I just unscrewed weird Urban art and fixtures and just like drop them and I’ve gotten very good at putting together like Legos the remote control because the remote controls never work at some point I just throw it at the wall and put that back together and have a remote control traveling because it’s more it’s easier for them to like using the fucking hotel remotes really and that’s like next level of you too anyways tickets
you still me was chilly and you won’t have a problem but they are vending machines I don’t know I called the front desk Guest Services I’m like wait what else is his job there’s nothing else available he just has to keep answering and saying we can make sandwiches
bad ones even just be like look how you felt like we both crashed at friend’s house as we don’t expect the Royal Treatment we could just like we’re drunk we’re hungry but but anyways I didn’t are there vending machines I don’t know he’s like well there should be one right in your floor if you if you go right towards the window and I thank you vending machines again I find my role of cash here we go the vending machine trip am I right kids Dollar by dollar with the o face it this way I know it’s you don’t know what is it what is it you want from us so I went with this one’s Chris this one’s got bubble gum on at you like that one should be showing that’s not the White House
at the Lincoln place I know my shit if the Lincoln Bay I don’t come to Boston Harbor without I got to think and I might go here we go again there’s a little sticker on the thing with a little QR code says hey get the app
if I can pull out my phone what I point the camera at the Q R code will link comes in and goes you want to go to get this app
go to the App Store and cuz it is that they’re talking about app goes
what’s up you want to download me
firm you want to join our club whatever you can give us a fake email if you want just give us begin with his $2 to dollars in the vending machine I got a free bag of fucking popcorn dollar 25 I ran to my room like I looked around I went back to my room and I can’t even a free bag of popcorn from a vending machine because I downloaded an app like like homeless people don’t know they’re never going to they’re never going to catch up to our Logan’s Run Society
there’s that there’s people out of the street, can I please have a quarter we’re like quarters don’t exist
play I thank you for your interest in our institution here’s your popcorn I didn’t even do anything rather than make a toilet for that money even indirectly even the toilet making that I do in Hollywood called Monster House I got a dude with a phone so I got popcorn fracking a dude with a phone so I went back and then I might be people need all my money back whatever they’re working on it needs to spread and it needs to be out all of society works so I did do go through the maybe for you to a team in the process of getting my credit card in there and it’s a it’s an app for vending machine it makes you like the Tarzan a vending machine when you’re near a vending machine that has this thing in it the vending machines if you turn on your notification it’s consensual you can choose to not do it the vent the vending machines will will which will vibrate your pocket and I know you like Twizzlers
you bought a lot of them
like we’re trying to get rid of some over here we being a box of food that normally you can only that you love when you look inside to see all these fun the things behind those robot arms and your legs but the filthy dollar thing like that turns you off I don’t want to I want to engage in this gross fucking Capital with sex thing with the herpes shake that you do with these robots are give me your dirty if I can hepatitis money and I’ll give you some back in a fucking bubble gum late and pit in your filthy and disgusting and nothing works and it just gave a limited it over here where you going on something $25 on your on your credit it lights up if you’ve never seen that
LED thing on a on a vending machine say credit $25
it’s like you one life just like fucking salted nut roll peanut butter crackers I give a fuck now I don’t usually get those I mean they look gross and dry and orange but why not there’s no it’s yours you own the vending machine now but isn’t your property but isn’t like they get your credit card number
I have a call back I would be if this was a comedy album that would be a great it would be like a kid in there be a little bit of silence and then my next bit would be like diapers are hard to buy I don’t have kids but I wish they are easier to buy but I do do you still have credit on that one particular jukebox jukebox machines all around the world that you can do this week
everything’s being apify so it’s like like it’s like it’s like this this thing uses other apps and then Banks and things to like like it interfaces with Apple pay or Mastercard has a thing that’s like Apple pay or there’s like all these Services where you can take a credit card it’s basically like PayPal you can like you can put some of your money in a reservoir but it’s your money it’s just the vending machine now knows you’re good for it you’re a fish you’re a whale
Harmons in town
all the times that you bought some at a vending machine what if you were what if you’re recognized for that buy vending machine
what are the famous like vending machine famous who vending machine do you want do you want a Payday I wouldn’t have sought the Petros but I know you like peanuts a nougat and you just feel like maybe later and they’re like fine is like we don’t care but like we’d love for you to have what we have and just it just feels I cried I cried all night I was a little drunk but I had just I really had an emotional reaction I was like weeping to my girlfriend I was like this is Steve text messages like this and she’s doing okay I’m glad you’re happy
but I didn’t punch a wall and I didn’t break any light bulbs and I didn’t I didn’t get on Twitter and like yell at a 15-year old kid until you hung himself because you are descending into a diabetic coma
how many items do you reckon you had last night
I didn’t know how many how many bag of Cheetos I had a bag of free popcorn at which doesn’t count and and then I and then the aforementioned I got those glow in the dark orange peanut butter crackers good for everybody this is going to be a more open-minded vendee Ben Ben Ben Ben Vendetta window last night about 1 a.m. and there was Dan standing on the corner of Charles and Stewart just handing food out to the homeless all night long
just giving you guys a time you had a hard time sleeping oh yeah so hard what you do would you do anything I yelled at people online
what’s the beef
what’s your beef myself to stay up until like 3 a.m. just yelping places I wanted to eat at when it when it when I got up I didn’t have to force myself because there were two ladies upstairs on the balcony talking all night long with you for a second
I can’t even I can’t even believe myself why do I put the wheels in motion as I have a friend here that I want to I want to introduce people to start making your clumsy way his path you can sorry sorry for the weird thing everyone would believe that great for everybody but you what’s up
what help is there someone so needs help call 911 or something is he hurt he needs help he needs medical help
oh shit can we get a
a doctor can we can we get an ambulance here
do we have any medical team out here
was he choking
all right water you did absolutely the right thing thank you for yeah
thanks for pulling together everybody would appreciate it. You’re doing your killing people
I’m so sorry
your vending machine gave him the vapors but anyways
after school
have you guys ever heard of the podcast lore
awesome thank you everybody
hi thanks for thanks for thank you I’m such a big fan you don’t know who I am but I’m a big fan
I love this shitt holyshit
yeah for those
call Lori is a very popular podcast did you know earrings kind of a self-starter and it’s like it’s like the crossroads between Legend and historical fact right like like it’s like oh for every for every vampire that we here exists there’s like a reason why we heard vampires exist when she goes back to some actual historical thing and that’s what Lori’s right that’s a pretty good description but the real reason for the success is that you take it very seriously you’re at you’re a good researcher and you’re good you’re a good performer to like you you’re reading your own septic on casting is better than other media at at at its best it’s because there’s an authenticity addition to the professionalism you’re not just a mannequin that was
that would be hot but that was that was like that was carved out by the system’s needs as I know he’s really good at making people believe him so he’s a one-man team that like you’re interested in this stuff and then you you are who you are and your personality like exude so we can trust you and listen to you talk about Loch Ness and vampires and werewolves in den den magic beans
and we do the magic fruit we made friends online because I because I tweeted that that after listening to your podcast a lot and I’m going to have Aaron like read you so that people aren’t familiar with him I’m going to have him do a cold read of one of his lore intros openings
which I just feel have a certain style to them a ten to the point where I like Ike Ike tweeted that after I make love to you too Cody I like to just finish by saying I’m Aaron Mahnke
and Emily say Cody has confirmed this
and then you tweeted back in and where they clearly aren’t offended by it and and and we became fast friends we’ve been out for drinks and and and we like we like each other’s jibbs but yeah I mean I’m not good at anything but do you want a cold read of kind of like what he does at the top of each of his episodes you’ve got one pulled up with the text and you Jeff you got some of the music please and a suit jacket
Glenlivet when I jump the music to begin
my June 24th 1408 a French Court sentenced murderer to death by execution she had entered the home of a neighbor and found a four month old child inside and it was her reason for doing so is he killed the child right there the house
after her trial she was moved to the prison to be held until her execution for the others who were in prison there most certainly Jared her they called her name’s desk they were hardened criminals but the other child even they were called the prison however treated her with the same as the same as those men charged
search for family the same daily rate for her meals the quality was a rare thing for her easy
on July 17th he was guided to the platform in a rope was placed around her neck a crowd was most likely gather that day to watch the spectacle like the criminals inside the prison to head Mater and shouted insults and then after the trapdoor snapped open she plummeted to her death it was over
history is full of these stories a criminal goes to trial and Justice when’s the day what was odd about that trial in 1408 though was the suspect because she wasn’t a local woman or even a relative of the child she killed
she wasn’t even human easy she was a pig
literally a farm animal tried in a court of law and sentenced to be put to death
and then executed on The Gallows 3 weeks later
better late than never
during the long history of criminal trials spanning cultures and Century all manner of oddities have entered the courtroom as unusual as it might sound to put Livestock on trial humans have been guilty of worse
you see sometimes even the dead get to testify I’m Aaron Mahnke is harmontown
Skrillex up here I thought you’d be like well I need 70 take some of that wasn’t in the original wasn’t pleased for the old episode 1408 they were Frugal enough and Thrifty and after they ate that pig or do you do not eat a condemned fig fig
I’m going to guess they ate it I want very badly to be able to do it to do this cuz I like that but like most fans a podcast like we listen we listen to you and then we want to do I want to do what you do and I don’t know if I but I have been thinking like what Jack has the music and I want to try doing it but but like I don’t know how it is like like like I just want to try one you just you just played play the music and give me at will you give me a give me a topic to give me a like
I don’t know where local enough for that
I just Salem Witch Trials I waited doesn’t yeah we’re going to start a fight talking about the history of ventriloquist in 1981
Arnold Palmer was at the top of the charts
he loves music but what he really loved was socks
socks made of cotton
an Arnold Palmer could only buy those socks in one store you see Cottonwood scares
and socks be made from them
so when Arnold Palmer walked into
the seers that day but he didn’t know
well is that he’d be starting on fire
the fluorescent lights to default e wiring in the section above the men’s socks caught fire and fell on his head
bursting into flames and ending the career
of a celebrated musician
you see America burns when it loves
whether it’s Michael Jackson or
a witch
is a witch
and where does a witch go
if a witch
doesn’t know
when I think about witches I think about Salem
the capital of witches foot
not a good place for them to live
you see
in Salem as far back as 1492
these witches far from sailing the ocean blue
we subjected to the opposite of ocean
fire
same fire that burns Arnold Palmer and Michael Jackson
and eventually the Loch Ness Monster
but that cold day in 1492 Salem was about to learn that what goes around
Burns around
I’m Aaron Mahnke this is Lorde
I have a couple of follow-up questions I sent Robert Palmer by the way Robert Palmer would be today
Arnold, Not only was Arnie a great golfer but he had a good time in his early in Arnold she’s so fine she got a bogey on the back nine
she’s so fine as iced tea and lemonade
so your podcast you you like oh okay so there’s these monsters and stuff in this is this how you get rid of them I mean is not part of it
no I come on like a Dracula shows up only works on I’m not really the Neil deGrasse Tyson of of folklore that’s not what I doing who is in your opinion
today in the world I haven’t heard of this until now so I’m going to check it out cuz you’re not you know you’re you’re more of a you know you’re not as much of a dog you’d be happy to know he’s working on his second season of the hit show Laura based on his podcast that there’s a season out what is it Amazon and you can watch it watch it come to life Terminator he’s so stupid stupid
are you from Boston is that why you’re here you’re like hey I’m going to be there in the folks that run the Wilbur have a tour company for a year-and-a-half ago you receive the Blue Man Group how would you get rid of a blue magic you make a circle of salt right and I think that stops them about the Blue Man Group if it’s bad drawer
play spin weird
immigration I think it’s a problem looks like a picture it’ll go it’ll be like a picture of a pretty white girl and I was saying like separated from her family when an immigrant shot her about people so so let’s let’s look at a bunch of sweeping legislation to protect people I’m sure you’re into all those and then and then and then they go I’m not just some trailer trash I do have opinions about others that was like why are we having a conversation that you crashed with your fucking photo of somebody saying like do a brown person and then and then they’re like they’re like look at this and it’s like a dead rat they bring in from the back yard and then you’re supposed to dim the lights and pour some wine and talk to them like adults like
okay but what keep looking OK Google what can I get rid of with that spell
I think I’m not understanding the show yet
still it’s not it’s about actual shit asshole
the Blue Man Group exists I’ve seen commercials
name something your Chad name something that doesn’t exist telling him that I’m stupid with the Robert Patrick side mouth even think I saw that and talking into a microphone you dip
I’m glad I came
that is the most Twisted attack on anyone ever I’m glad I’m here
deserve me being in your life
what happened to a better person
I found what it’s like to be on Twitter right now
yeah well you know you had you had that you had that you had a little dust-up with Chris D’Elia and you were active on Twitter and you’ve been like you know your your your Aaron Mahnke and the end and your and your end you’re like you have your opinions and you’re like finding out what all of us are which is like old people might like your podcast cuz it’s about werewolves and they might also maybe vote differently from you or like have a different leg like opinion and then you like to eat something and then people like pylon you write like they go like what the fuck bro my girlfriend and I try to talk to your podcast man
Taco werewolves on your Twitter and then you’re like
meet me right well you know better late than never
probably if you don’t get on Twitter to become a happy right like oh wait wait wait we can recognize at least as a as a population that we don’t get on Twitter to make ourselves happy we’re getting on Twitter to make ourselves unhappy like we never go like I’m so happy right now I should be happier I’m going to get on Twitter if you’re happy you forget to get at Twitter if you’re sad you like I’m so fucking sad I don’t know whether I should eat glass like like like to eat a box of donuts like like dip my head and turpentine or get on Twitter and like Twitter is the closest thing you can do
WhatsApp or befriended vending machine for my my personal trainer Dave Klein if you watch my Instagram workout
Kid finds going to show you he told me you know he kind of blew my mind with this I’m trying to I’m trying to practice this and seeing how it goes. He said you know love can be a weapon I didn’t put it that way
you can if you can choose to express love and being a loving place a Xanax actually as an assertion of your power I’m paraphrasing him it’s like like like like it doesn’t we associate love with like I said send and like oh I’m I have to break through past all of my needs to be in control and and and not feel stupid and like all these things that Society demands of us in the Moment Like Great Lake Beach I like it’s kind of incompatible with this idea we have about love which is that your Zen and you’re open to everything and and you’re even kind of weak on purpose and you have everyone’s point of view and stuff but there’s this version of love where you can just be like
I love everything because that gives me power that makes me a good person and it gives me the person I can you can choose to do it for kind of selfish reasons to be like I’m in love with what’s going on right now because it’s because I’m better than people I think that’s Watson with the Borg rimac honestly when you’re not feeling well at all and I just want to like to eat a rock right now I don’t want to love anything and it was like yeah but you know you know what love is making everybody else eat your fucking love shit
it ain’t like you Gina and I got you think if I get off the elevator at Rick and Morty’s offices and I come out in late and I’m feeling like I loved being there I’m going to everyone else is going to be happier and do a better job in lake lake lake it’s it it it it is strengthened it is leadership for today how are you going to do that 70 episodes
I mean by loving by loving it I love it it’s so many damn it’s so many episode 70 how many of you done so far what’s the answer I have a question what’s the answer to your question
what’s a Rick and Morty
I don’t know you know what you’re supposed to be an unspoken exchange of fandom here right
no but you’re ready with the you know how many episodes I have you haven’t even started we’ve been waiting how long
right I didn’t cry
come on where is it where is it where is it where is it what are you doing you better start writing it
are you going to write one right now then if I have milk
welcome to notes
I can’t wait to do that first born page just open up
this is Levy’s laptop he’s asexual
he’s not a sexual
last night
the only thing I hear that tour dates believe me I take it back I’m sorry I didn’t mean that it’s actually I think I have it at the end of you I like I would like to be a sexual would you like to be are you asexual first first are you question want to fuck you think that a sexual bars and they’re like I don’t need to have sex with me neither may as well then right yeah
and they have the best sex ever cuz they’re like this doesn’t matter I agree
it’s like that’s not how we feel about Krispy Kreme right like there’s nothing lately like they would be great I’ll be the best sex I’ve had sex should be probably I don’t mean to I don’t want to trivialize it for Romantix though sex should be important if it’s important to you it’s important Aaron Mahnke
when you’re done do you say I’m Aaron Mahnke
everybody that’s here tonight I was on a date please go home if I can say that afterwards
I’m Aaron Mahnke
and you may be carrying lore
so far I love it
I can’t
I don’t know who can you can you press the green button tell me a a a a n u on your toolbar a a a a a a
will will will will it be bald out of like pinky before the show is finished
Dan just maximize the window
fade in fade in
it doesn’t it doesn’t Speedway me
make it big
all right
yabu same credit card and bank account number vending machine password venmo
I for the listeners at home Steve Levy in the Ender and making dinner trying to figure out how computers work and Dan Dan is going to Freestyle
number tracker
Steve just plugged in we got word open that whole ordeal with opening one file
or if you wanted to be a surprise keep your eyes closed
interior Rick’s garage day
Rick is making science
Rick
brackets scientifically
it should be some good
Triumph
morning
Marty 14 hot but doesn’t know it enters Morty
Rick and Morty
Morty Rick
does it does it matter
Morty
it is a simmer
does anybody have to do a really good Rick or Marty impression you’re doing great
check one two
crew crew crew crew you’re going to narrate
I do more tea does that I don’t do both
are you too far away
good morning outside
I’m with Rick and Morty ones that are longer than other ones together and it’s only going to result in a bunch of words give me as well just accept your controls
Marty you sound more like Mickey Mouse
just going out to go to bed
we’re not paying you were playing here I thought this was Whose Line
what part are you okay
who provides it’s Rick
aren’t you the guy from the audience with Dan Harmon
what did I ever do every time
toilet making
enough to pretty slow start morning
cuz it got this going off the rails money then Sinister do you want to see the rails Morty
I want to see the rails Morty
the Donnie Darko
the Donnie Darko guidelines
they make everything we haven’t done the things that
we’re already going to do
sister Bon Jovi
follow me or
you already have
Rick’s Rick walks into a thing and pushes a thing
Justin usually deals with the visuals
a door open to try to sing
theater in it
Patrick I like okay yes please
party trick
take me down to the Funky Town
brick
what
Funky Town
all the new a money-losing is it for bathrooms
what the fuck
nevermind
come on
down the stairs to the to the rails
is there a real number on your voice Morty
Archie’s not mine
not going to tell you again
Rick Morty downstairs my voice
Spencer vocal surgery in a few days you want to take over as really yeah
it’s nine 11:40
11 alarm 11 alarm
we could use that on mine 11
okay but just remember you have to distract us from things we already do it
Aaron Mahnke xxx hot and knows it stepped from the Shadows
hello
holy shit Morty is Aaron Mahnke
aphorism
great desire Parts papers
identity has always been an awkward concept
from the shores of Salem
in 1492
did the Boston Mall in 1982
mankind or should I say some kind
I saw it to answer one particular nagging questions
Manuel Perez
who am I
where did I get here from
grammatical spell check
eats cracker
crunch crunch crunch how can I guarantee that a Dracula won’t bury me alive
the answer has come in a variety of forms
new shoes
pocket rocket
Bail Bond
the one scene continues to emerge
on this Winding Road of mortality
I’m Aaron Mahnke and this
is the Omega protocol that that was a good
Aaron Mahnke turns into a moth man
good morning
I just wanted to be
all will be consumed by the flame I Circle I thought it was a typo
you like the delivery was that good
are making beats everyone
fade out to everybody
I don’t think that’s going to be
I don’t think it’s going to be riveting radio
that’s going to be great television
send it season is 70 episodes long
episodes a year and early retirement I will show you how bad a Rick and Morty can get more
I’m writing one right now with my extra Iron Man suit at home this is episodes
I’ll fuck up a Spider-Man from here I don’t care I’m going to training Spider-Man with one suit all right
Spider-Man in all right
mankind has been eating food for years decades If we’re honest and her most of that time it hasn’t been insulted
when did John Wilkes Booth walked into the mall one day he had no idea what he was about to add to the colon Terrio culinary landscape
buying a big crystalline Rock he needed to lick it and lick it he did
symptoms. Has been commonplace at the dinner table Across America and the world
but that made no difference to Margaret Cho as she left her house one morning headed to the same mop
what she found was peculiar
a corpse torn asunder covered in blue markings and surrounded by the remnants of a broken salt Circle
no one knows what the first sighting of the Blue Man Group was
and one doesn’t have to to fear you see things that are blue have a way of coming back around
and things that aren’t might just surprise you
I’m Aaron Mahnke and this is lore
Florida
that’s good I am a huge I’m a huge fan I love your stuff you got the job thank you. The real world take on folklore is very inspiring as someone who weaves folklore into fantasy you know narratives I think it’s really cool source of inspiration
hear from people that do DND campaigns and they take inspiration from the show to build stuff
with races on the topic everyone everyone right now
and a couple of campaigns ago I was a lore Bard College’s I always wanted to be where does where the best spells you can make fun of people the entire night if you could kill someone by insulting them it’s amazing
throughout history pants
I have had one purpose to cover or present the extremities below the abdomen
however your pants appear to be entirely removed from that purpose well all together
they look like raggedy ass Kmart pants
I married me
your parents
and this is Laura Byrne
they used to call bad shape his waivers we met when I was a kid you had to have like these big crazy your shoes had to be like Reaganomics so I can like Nike things that I’d like pumps and then velcro and zippers and Michael Jackson had to be in one of the laces and if you had anything less sure than that like something that you know more recently would be nice shoes that people like a canvas all stars yellow over time piss wipers play Wicked pissed wipers from the Boston back to the hotel that I’m staying in
that’s the two locations I know the home of Quincy Jones in the sky old-timey lanterns
two if by Sea I don’t know what I’m doing it’s the jingle for the Boston tourism board I don’t know what I’m doing
he actually played it you did you play Fallout 4 New Vegas I thought nobody knew Vegas was after fall tank up before Fallout 4 I remember being annoyed that makes you my kind
big one
nnnn in Fallout New Vegas it was just looks like an expansion Boston Liberty trail at the thing for how many P stops do you think if you were true that you could name on The Liberty trail oh yeah the supermutant I doubt
what would you guys like
communicating with them
if you hear it’s a mate like I like to just think that they love all video games this much and if we are like OverWatch they be like oh my God I love video games
I would I would ask Jen equally unsurprising if you guys hated Fallout 4 it cuz it was like
monster in the park
Senator was you certainly wouldn’t have any help pass around it he wouldn’t eat at Legal Seafood in when I got my Union Oyster House
all right well what have we done so far we’ve covered a lot of Rick and Morty done up a bunch of episodes of lore
the Blue Man rap this time I’d like to bring the word cockamamie back a little bit
are there a great way to make me less of an elitist would be to show me how much better an anonymous horde would be at running my fucking life or kill me
oh yeah I’m an elitist I don’t lie I think I’m better than a bunch of people I don’t know who the fuck do you think a bunch of people I don’t know
all right I think the end of course you guys wouldn’t be into that you’re a bunch of people I don’t know
but each one of you is an individual is a fucking elitist and you’re very near the coast you’re basically Costa Lil eats
Gilbert
The elusive libtard is a creature referred to in the forest to the catacombs of almost every urban city throughout history supposed to not Urban cities
the libtards seems to manifest itself times and places where well people don’t have much going on
Abraham Lincoln
couldn’t have expected his boots to start talking to him
but that’s exactly what they did
on the morning of October 11th 1928
returning to his home having absconding with the Lindbergh baby
a weary Lincoln place the child down to the table expecting it perhaps justifiably to fly
only to watch it
die
Abe Lincoln would return that baby to the wooded edges outside the Lindbergh estate but in so doing he would start a bit of a dilemma
among the rural not Elites
you see
Abe Lincoln was above all a libtard and he had now killed the baby of perhaps one of the most celebrated blue-collar Heroes the man who single-handedly flew from Paris to New York
thereby proving that we didn’t need the former
Johnny Lindbergh who’s buried in those woods his fractured Cranium oozing
baby brains I’m sorry which wouldn’t have been offensive in Ohio
by the Wayne Laura’s rocks you with limited commercial however you will be hearing some inline branded content
I’m here in Budweiser
and this is the cold clear Taste of fully Frozen beer
didn’t you never mind
Aaron Mahnke what why do you like lore that’s not that’s not the production the the thing that made that you stole the title from the noun why do you like lore why do you like it so much that you own it now
but you could but you can easily there’s a million I got you could you could just be like hey here’s some like unresearched like fucking urban legends about werewolves and things but you you like the idea that the truth is that the stuff might be that our world might be more magical or do you like the fact that we shouldn’t even be calling it magic it should just be called normal because light real life is fucking creepy good question
it’s like a little boy yeah
is that like was that one of your guiding themes that you wanted to express through the podcast where did you find that after your research because that is a very tough like the main theme in in your stuff right is that it’s actually humans
what about
Village that got one of their ladies and cut her heart out and made a ton of God of it and then drink it
yeah and there was no magic that it’s actual experiments on trying to create like raise the dead things that people actually did it’s not it’s not mystical court cases that actually happened until it was some blood and some semen and maybe some bones and then shove it up of horses with him and wait for you crack open a nice cool baby
add Baby Swiss.com more offer code or that makes sense yeah it doesn’t make sense but we only know it doesn’t make sense because we’re standing on the shoulders of scientists and actually that would be science at a certain way cuz you’d be like well as other things if you have blood in semen in them and then a baby comes out to your leg or how about if I put blood and semen in a gourd come on we’ve got to be able to do this alone
it’s it’s it’s it’s it’s safe to keep pulling this out and every argument people like you wouldn’t exist I wasn’t going to be able to like I can make a horse gourd I haven’t seen a written yet but we can make the argument that the Alchemists were like the first in cells right packing and trolling and I go would have led was gold basically been her emails to believe he could take urine and distill it into gold cuz you know they’re both yellow right so he spilled his basement with buckets of his own piss do you want to rip this
I want to hear what it sounds like when you do our impression or something else if my favorite Bob Dylan song what about the chupacabra
but you got plenty of kick plate get him at the music that is about his Spirit like that’s what he needs
1121 Johannes van fucking Bass
wanted to make gold
they did they wanted to make come true
a little truth
he bought himself a five dozen bucket
using an ancient Tome line the buckets up in his basement in a nice crib
repeat it
it’s spelled he has spirits that night but that’s what happened
the six weeks later that you’re in head evaporated it left a sticky yellow residue
W didn’t turn in the gold
but that cologne kept the ladies away for decades
I marry making this is
call now if you pulled out what’s good
I mean you’ve got the weapon that it is your real voice so you can I mean it’s pretty it’s just fun to listen to it alright well especially toilet toilet toilet maker salary
the money these people paid tonight like they’re definitely entitled to DND right like
the printout Steve Levy everybody’s alright I need to stay around wasn’t going to stick around with us a little the end of may be all right would you stay and play the character of Bernie Mac is a bear that was brought into
oh damn
in 1967 a bear was found unconscious filled with semen
its lungs collapse from crying for help
all right so I don’t know if you guys don’t know where our boundaries are but I keep every time every time we brush up against each other or I haven’t only every time you guys are like or boo you should get that right on my eyes are good people
play that say it’s good to have that much irrigation of the Fallout franchise it’s it’s it’s good to take civic pride I’m sorry I spoiled you tonight
I do like you
it doesn’t sound the same as that doesn’t your skull that’s all I can tell you I got to you it sounds like crystal clear.
I’ll be there it’s just patches Jam last time which might have
are we did you want to drink
beyond the church militant of the of the silver flame we finally did something right but some Spencer Pratt you might be embarking on a New Journey possibly we might just all right so we got Chad to fireliker we got Gary shambling the shambling manly guy
we got diarrhea Junior and that you’re going to be a you’re a talking since Berry and Bernie Mac the green ones for Rob
barely met you don’t get one unfortunately you have bear powers and if you want to do stuff you know 17
am I wearing armor I know okay but Bernie Bernie Mac or James Adomian call them are signed Wells some like that Lord I don’t know so what’s up okay hey guys how’s it going great
last time on harmontown
are gyros
where were they there in that town door Nestor Nestor on the Quest for patches Jim they tried not very hard they gave up easily and then DJ went back at it and got captured
sensing imminent defeat Our Heroes left into action and went to rescue DJ and they found a fight though they fought Jeff turned into a tree a bear showed up at work with a wiffle ball teleported people outside of the building after all was said and done they had a hostage they interrogated the hostage and that led them to Boykin Hodges.
at the farm Our Heroes were interrogated by the mute Boykin Hodge and with his help they found the stable they were looking for and the gym that was patches but then they were attacked by that very same man who turned out to be a vampire he was easily killed
what will happen next
find out now on Harmon time
okay sorry everybody so you’re in Boykin Hodges Peak Stables you had just killed him and he exploded into dust and skeletons after being staked by Gary shambling fingers just and skeletons
he exploded into ya multiple multiple dust okay before sorry no you go thank you it’s not sarcasm
you know before
before killing this vampire I was having second thoughts about whether or not we were good or bad people and you know I’m a monster but you know I’m also a decent person so I you know but we did some good work here pretty much just me but I’ll be there is that good things are cuz this vampire probably would have heard some other people and creating more vampires which would hurt other people so you’re welcome
I’m going to stick around I’m thinking I’ll stick around because I should I should hold it because I killed the vampire so just I just bought that thank you thank you and you put some blood and you put it up a bear’s ass
I don’t know what to say I just
I am going to hold on to it but you didn’t kill kill vampire he’s kind of an outlier an outlier
I don’t know what
all right here’s the gym
thank you
it’s not for comedy it’s like we’ve been looking for it for a long time what do you why would it be for comedy if we’ve been I just put it in my lead I know it’s just not a bit like I don’t you can do made of bits like I I don’t know I don’t know I didn’t even have pockets like like like beer but you’re like a shambling mound I have pockets of stuff all over the place here take it take it take it take it back since you find it’s on the ground I pick it up and put it in my glass jar okay
Aaron is this how you play D&D this how you do it but there’s always the one guy who picked everything up and put it in a glass jar and the audience and everything gets thank you lease how many pockets of leaves do you have all of them I don’t know what are what you know it’s just move on from this he’s got it I thought I you know I thought you know you appreciated what I did but you didn’t so it doesn’t matter doesn’t matter you don’t have to appreciate what we need to do we need to find past his gem to patching what a great question
why were you finding patches Jam do you guys remember
well because we felt guilty because we got waylaid by Bandits on the road and they took patches gym right and see you’re getting it for him well that’s up to you but yeah kind of the last time he was in the town before it caught fire by now if not you can see it from the farm at it’s still going
all right let’s go let’s go let’s go sneak into town is probably a big commotion going on how did the fire start what do we have any enemies that are still outstanding it’s that mean they’re dealing with that sort itself out and you know like it’s part of the fucking thing is like then 9/11 happen and then I like I’m saying like they’re undergoing a thing in that town right now we’re we that we could probably relax the wall little bit like we do, how far away is the town can we see
I’m you’re technically in the town you’re just going to like the farming so we’re already here yeah but it’s like the fire is on the other side of the town so that’s why you can see it and you’re not like in a fire right now okay
let’s go walk in and start our passions hunt or shamble around for him thank you
don’t you have a little song on this side of town
I throw walking through the town Spencer
chambelan
you’re walking through the town and most of the people aren’t around it’s it’s kind of night and so it’s like late night but everyone here you can hear a commotion coming from the fire it seems like everyone’s working together to try to put out the fire are they doing an okay job you can’t quite see him because you’re still Liquors rows of houses and buildings that are interposing your body
how to win back their favor can’t see because you’re not so well and there’s no buckets there’s a whole like we call like a citizen’s ladder there their station from the well all the way to the fire and they’re very engaged in passing water oh yeah they look at you in and wave you over and immediately insinuated you into their line
okay with a bear coming in any port in a storm around town that everyone laughs and their fucking love in this shit
charge of fire prevention right because
my immune to fire Spencer because I have all this power thing you have some resistance I heard that expensive okay but I dropped off a building on fire and I shoot fire in a ring around the fire to its simplest one oxygen around it Smothers of fire what spell is that
produce flame produce flame not enough fire you can try that reduce flame I mean a little tiny bit like control fire is a different spell if I understand the fireball of my hand right here about the actual running back and forth
I’m just digging a hole he’s a he’s a Centrist that’s what they call a donut
you’re almost immediately recognized as the guy who started the fire
remember that
what what happens what are they saying they start pointing you out because your kind of running fast and they’re all very busy so but you start to notice people who aren’t involved in firefighting start to Cluster and accumulate around I quietly walked backward away from him all right the only person with the with a rapport with the town exit the situation
I think that’s a smart move
alright so yeah it looks like people are sizing you up maybe to like attack you or like to call the police or something
send me the times of trial by fire that we must consult the silver flame teachings on the matter for non silver flame is always the result of friction and friction comes from fear of fire search the fire will consume the Earth if the silver flame is not acquiesce to and what is the silver in playing but the love acceptance acquiescence water even is more silver play me than orange planing I sneak to the back of the crowd while while he’s talking I do
I like what are you saying you’re a great distraction and everyone turns to look at you because you’re a giant monster trying to like pretend to be very as nondescript people
it doesn’t mean I don’t believe what whoever
bear or shambling Mound or human or out-of-towners or mischievous darting flame wizard person
what is the real orange flame that we must put out now with love and accepting everyone actually unconditionally the Real Enemy fire is the Real Enemy on fire it’s not worth paying attention to at this particular time you are other conflicts will keep you could you can jump on somebody and say Hey you offended me that was microaggressive after we beat these Nazis
there’s a cat on fire water it one of the tire but seems like the opposite of what you were saying up till that point I may have digressed sneaking around the crowd trying to see if I can find Patches in the crowd all right you’re still pretty recognizable so I’m also looking around me so sure of everybody I throw my shield down cake on my sordid to start doing the craziest fucking dance I could think of there are now five distraction
hey look at that goddamn how about a sixth of the pounding of hoofbeats on pavement The Familiar sound of a horse with a writer and on that horse to hear a voice rang out a familiar voice from a grizzled old man this is what happens to those who spurn the Flames light it’s Geffen he’s wearing brown armor and he’s wielding a big flaming Mason he’s bashing it into wooden structures and setting fires remember Geffen from episode 241
refresh my memory on guessing he’s just the guy you know okay cuz he could befriend her phone he’s a he’s a friend generally
where’s my friends with patching know he doesn’t he knows he patent it but anyway he’s like lighting more fires and he he rides his horse through the line of volunteer fireman and smashes one in the head with a flaming meso and why this is what happens to those who spurn the Flames like a flashback to a moment on your prior campaign of the eldeen reaches when you and Gavin were also lighting villages on fire but now you feel worse about it
because like it seems fucked up like in the present
yeah
this is like what you used to be doing but you know it was a good thing when you were doing it back then and now it’s like you don’t like that it’s happening
come on
I heard you
that’s not what you were doing you want a more fire no fuck
he writes that you weren’t doing that he doesn’t he doesn’t
he doesn’t write off
because you know you might not remember this about your character but you used to be like this fucked up guy who did a lot of shity shity I still am yeah I’d still like to like this guy was a partner in crime now he’s like your your foil maybe I don’t know they fire you know and the silver flame which is actually not real fire will it hit the fire is very real and it just trying to split a hair to get my friends from being arrested
and Kevin bad time for the for the gaffer
dial it back
well now he rides off
sorry
I call out because now The Jig Is up anyway I call out patches
I thought I thought you said we were the good guys maybe that’s what this town deserves
and it seems like everything we do we end up being the bad guys okay I just I’m just starting to think I’m remembering my previous life with Kevin and I’m like yeah I actually we were good at one thing burning towns in murdering people making people understand that it was God that was doing it to though that we should instead of trying to put the fire out fire with fire I like fire
he said he likes it he doesn’t pay the lights it oh yeah yeah it was my understanding is that Stephen geoffreys this is not what the church is for I’m the right person and I’m going to change the church on the inside that we keep doing this is is fine it’s forgivable and it’s actually just admirable that I don’t want to do it anymore did Geffen really right off yeah I mean he seemed kind of embarrassed but also like you really enjoyed it and was kind of like you look bad in front of you by like doing the wrong thing but he thought it was the right you know
respect me that much now we just thought that I was killing time and he really basis that on me
which which I apparently misinterpreted some of your words and thought you were inciting violence
you think it was odd that I was preaching to burn the town that’s what it seems like but I thought you were being a distraction like I don’t even think your earnest about it you’re just like trying to be distracted I didn’t burn the town down you were talking about how great fire with fire and that I heard him
about to get lynched and then he was coming into the firewood fight fire and so that’s what happened 10 minutes ago it’s probably 15 minutes ago from the monsters that are there any buildings not on fire yeah shrooms house so there you go to Cheryl’s house it’s empty no one’s home doors locked my bro
sisters that aren’t fighting a fire I am on a quest for the Church of the silver flame is anyone seeing patches
God no one’s really paying too close attention to you they’re like a tending to the wounded and dead and fighting a fire
important stuff and comes back
Japanese like my Tyler Durden music shows over there
hey Carlos you want their attention you want your attention yes do you want by the way are we going to get kicked off stage start
yeah I know we like doing the show we’re having a great time
because board is US believe me I know no that was a good joke great joke
yeah me too
barely manage and I that will put out fire water like be religious and ask for Patsy but he said that he saw your cigarettes are not going to pay attention to you because the fire out how do we find anything find a bag that looks like it has water symbols on it a bag bag with water symbols on it what are you think it’s a bag of water let’s go
Bernie Mac
into back to town waving the bed with water symbols on it good just the Breeders with the Breeders album
and okay so you’re flailing around the bag and like drops of water in like water spilling out of it like it’s like a full bucket or something you think you could run in a circle
absolutely right around and we’re doing percentage wise how good of a job the bag is like tied off and so it’s not really a good idea and then we start again running around crazy magic it’s like you’re holding the fullest bucket everywhere and every motion just hordes of liar
how many laps do the fire takes about 10 minutes but you put out the building on fire and a lot of a lot of like real estate for for firefighters to stand right right okay all right next building would we do the same thing so do you want to keep doing that all over town the fire is out it’s been 2 hours
you know something Carlos
you’re right
we are the good guys
30 Wheel Parts
39 / 2/5
tonight we are all Aaron Mahnke
cranky crew and Carla maker I hope you feeling better
Steve Levy
who’s the president of Egypt
I just hope, Jeff Davis give it up for your marriage
thank you boss in your fucking gorgeous that you’re so friendly thank you I will never forget this trip thank you
play nice
can’t wait to come back you guys are amazing
this she’ll talk to you about baby twins
pump up the house music Alex
I guess I’ll drive fast to take campus