Episode
Episode: 293 – LIVE from The Cradle of Aviation Museum in Long Island, NY
Description
Live from The Cradle of Aviation Museum in Long Island, NY. Featuring Dan Harmon, Jeff Bryan Davis, Spencer Crittenden, Rob Schrab and Steve Levy.
Transcript
hello everybody
yeah
I just looked behind me and what what where the fuck are we
somewhere in the middle of outer space
or in the leafy Groves of Long Island New York
the fantabulous Cradle of Aviation Museum here in Long Island harmontown is now it’s such a
National Treasure with you please walk him into the mind the game Master Spencer Crittenden
thank you thank you what’s up Spencer I don’t know man what’s up with you what is the beautiful realm of dark matter and light matter combined together to stretch it expand your mind the space-time itself please put your hands together for the mayor apartment to Jack Hartmann
hello
hello universe
hello Milky Way
thank you thank you. There’s there’s one guy yelling out
I’m not insulting you just repeating it’s it’s something that I need to hear after a couple days of pizza and stuff of all time and space so yeah everybody looks like right now it makes him look smaller, the guy’s a little thick in the Caboose she went to stand next to well thanks for coming and I know you guys are probably been a convention all day today most of you write is
and I think a lot of a lot of the folks here who stood in line for for a while that we’re at the signing and too long to this later and it’s it’s it’s virtually vertical raked planetarium that were in except it’s just three dudes hahaha all of people like the people in the second row are only a little bit behind the people in the first route they’re mostly above them like you could date you can climb their faces
is it possible to fire up the deer the planetarium so we can have like the Pleiades and shit behind this way
I’m almost certainly answer is no but I think is behind this for the listener that there is just a giant like empty void
yeah I don’t I don’t think I don’t think I don’t think you’re spontaneous Nation
you want to drink that what are you talking about all I’ll conjure up a cocktail for you okay teamwork
the partnership in the beginning as you know
there was there was nothing
which means there was no time which means that there was infinite time which means there was a hundred percent chance of anything happening including the whole universe which was a spontaneous he brought into existence in the form of a tiny particle exactly the density of infinity which then exploded into everything and will one day either collapse or sucked back in on itself and in the meantime here we are for our brief few frames in a very very high speed camera shot of an explosion has lasting 80 trillion years standing in that giant vast expanse of what we consider time some of us have chosen to dress like Deadpool for the evening business explosion is is that a one giving me Miami flashbacks though just
I don’t think this is that kind of crowd I think if you guys had had to had reached your ears a point of your psychosis where are there you would come on these are these are planetarium folk there yet
dirt dirt dirt they’re triggered by people behind desks questioning their sanity like that’s the guidance counselor is that they’ll get the difference between being held back in third grade and being moved up to sixth grade is like whether the principles IQ is ninety or ninety-five right
hi I’m I my mom off and told me the story that she’s like they wanted to hold you back in kindergarten like I had to go and yell at the principle the principle was like he’s like he can’t walk on a balance beam Reed college textbooks is he’s like he can’t use scissors is a society walk down a log and end end wrap everyone’s Christmas gifts
but but but but it and illiteracy would be fine for that would like like they could you didn’t beams are waiting for him out there in the world
I am pretty bad about someone using scissors until time right bad at math but yeah boy howdy could I read
just like you guys right
do we got any literate in the house
where my illiteracy
where’s my dyslexia I’m in Long Island so I had a Long Island iced tea at dinner and
what you actually did for those who don’t know how to make a Long Island iced tea you take a 16 year old in their parent kitchen while the parents are out of town you open the cupboard and you pour whatever is in there because you don’t want any of the bottles to reveal that you took any of them so then you end up with a full cup of every liquor in the cabinet that’s a Long Island iced tea to drink when you’re younger cuz you know how to order of them it’s not it’s like you can’t get the words wrong no one’s going to go you’re not 21 the way you said Long Island Iced Tea
you must be a bachelorette
One Long Island Iced Tea coming up
the Long Island of course he’s not that long as a viking goes back to Viking times people that didn’t want the Vikings to find Long Island would tell them it’s very long island you can’t miss it
is Gort hoping that the Vikings would end up a New Jersey what they did
I don’t know anything about geography it’s just very crafty Precambrian atlanteans that wanted to protect Long Island and its culture
are we ignoring Nassau County and NASA is a Native American word meaning rich white people
it hurts people. Know that you guys are going to the same place and you have privilege
call Sam truth is truth you can’t just take the parts you like
I thought you were joking right at dinner about this Long Island iced tea I thought you were just amusing but you actually drink one again it’s a kind of made me nostalgic
look at you talk about a drink long enough today to order why do they make them better here and do you think it’s a lie got ya I didn’t finish it I’m going to head over and I’ll have a bad hangover tomorrow but I tried that I don’t want to be anti-climactic with it but look as I was trying on the plane I was trying to write a long island song but
when we were in Boston Dan Road a Boston song and it was episode
the only guys I just it’s more of an emotional thing isn’t just your weary head right now
Long Island rest your weary face it’s too long for too long now Long Island you’re a pizza song for Long Island Long Island be with me Long Island Long Island Frolic costumes
well you waited in line Long Island
how long will you
the country and not just an island to me you’re up in insula Long Island I love you are you really that long at all winter spring summer fall give me a call new phone who dis
some of that was some of that I wrote just now because I was pretty special of a Journey concert
I want to play I want to plug the app that I use there because it’s the only seems fair but also I kind of don’t want to cuz it feel like it’s my secret weapon with songwriting it’s called toward but it’s a really good app like for if you if you if you if you’re not musically trained but you only know like oh I need cords and I need to know which cards work together and you’ve you just so you just like it it’s a good thing cool cool app you can like quickly move cords around here if they work together so was that whole song in that or did you like make chords in the movement of garage band that was just to get you can eat you can be very simple I can just play tones and you can give you enough sophistication with it did you make that sound cuz you’re exhausted just hate that it’s the lead programmer on GarageBand
going to be a long day at work tomorrow
we’re here in about from the Long Island Patrick people that actually understand music but I like I like GarageBand you have to like poking swipe and poop around in order to just stay well what if this was an a sharp instead of a bad out I work at Apple
I quit Dano quit working for Dan I went back to Apple
see if I have any what about you I would have I lost you and then I found you there cuz I got to act like a broken friendship
did you make an appointment
yeah I thought I did
but it turns out maybe a muscle through and then you’re like it’s alright it’s fine he has an appointment
at the emotional Genius Bar
no Dan
yeah let’s see I’m just looking for is a song fragments Long Island up and down Long Island come to town
bluffing I put a senior song Long Island make your Island long in Manhattan and I came in as a friend of mine lived somewhere in that Sauk County is 4th of July and we had all these sparklers and like smoke bombs and my kind of low-grade fireworks and we went like the parents were doing their thing and getting drunk and making food and stuff to me and my friend Luke not Luke David we were does it matter
and we went there that there was a telephone pole and it was like giant ants were like living inside of the cracks inside old telephone poles that kind of tired and what not and he’s big and living inside it moving around so we started sticking smoke bombs in there and is it inside the telephone pole
Aspire in the bomb and Aunt before Bush and took no credit for it live is currently 10 years old we took a batteries and light bulbs and we like made this like Blinky thing with electrical tape that we I don’t think we don’t know if we wanted it to look like a bomb I really do I think I think we wanted to just look like a crazy sci-fi thing and we like taped it to the screen door of a girl that lived in the neighborhood that I guess that was our way of saying I love you we’d like to kiss you one day. Blinky device but and her father came to the door and called the bomb squad I got called the police and they called the bomb squad and they’re really everywhere flashlights and
assault rifles and liars and then we just we just sat on the swing porch and watched in my mom was like what are we supposed to do say yes like like we’re going to get more than beating we’re going to get the shots like these people I didn’t they wasn’t her idea that Johnny gum would get involved
just wanted to just wanted to call in the bomb threat of affection this was before me to it was a perfectly acceptable way to call upon a young lady to plant the bomb on her father’s door yesterday
if back in the late 70s early 80s nothing nothing said will you be mine as it’s so complicated like are you supposed to use a Molotov cocktail or like what happened to romance flashbang ago no no I want to do what the right thing is like I’m trying I bet and I just I don’t know what what it is anymore I’m sorry about the very early days of harmontown colonizing the moon I think this is the closest that we’ve gotten we’re here and we were on the moon
Stars that’s the problem the lights are washing out the planetarium
that sounds like a distraction
we can’t see up there
cheapest we can’t see
nebula
Jesus Christ
at what happened I can’t see anything trash can
are you okay
all right will again I was going to bring you up I had a
I had a thing kind of plant. It didn’t work did you fall down the stairs because it sounded like you did and I only saw Darkness I drink trash can come down this 70�� flow
what’s the name of sound hear sound hear he got completely splashed by just miscellaneous liquids diet I thought they would be tape on the stairs glow-in-the-dark no offense but I thought Rob was Rob Rob will you stand up for a second and just
I said Don’t Touch of Dutch what did we tell you about matter
why did Time come on man
no I had I mean I didn’t have my love I tried to go for it was supposed to be a big-shot didn’t work out the way I planned it I’m really sorry I’m sorry you got splashed you made the Stars happen though was it part of Italy did fall down the stairs and hurt myself if you’re curious yeah I was I asked if you were okay and you just stared off into space hit my head a couple of times I’m so sorry don’t you already have like a hairline fracture all the way down your skull from when you start Teen Wolf when you were in college and tried to do a handstand on the top of a moving car yes
when I was when I was when I was in high school
I wrote I wrote that movie
in the theater
and then we went wow that looks like cool I’m not turning into a wolf but or playing basketball but just seems like a path to growth yeah I do want to respect your friends however it looks like a myself started driving dim Kayla’s car driving driving driving down Mayville like back roads and stuff where there was no like lights or anyting is a farm area and Corey goes on First and he’s like to talk to you and then and then and then it’s your turn and then as he gets off he goes dude when the car stops pretend like you’re falling off a little freaked out Dan Kayla was driving the car it’s on like the world and then Kayla comes to a stop and then every single thing went black and I Woke Up 3 hours late
are in damn Kayla’s living room with Corey holding like a like a newspaper it was like blood and any day you want to go to the hospital I know I just want to go home and go to sleep over my skull was cracked and then I started a return to trade like you know like they don’t know like the human being is designed to adapt to whatever Society there going to be a human society’s moral compass might be based on the complete dispense ability of you have a life with everybody so afraid of getting into trouble and getting yelled at that you’re willing to let one of your friends go to sleep and wake up not breathing
yard when I was in Milwaukee and Frankie I had warned you at Stan Frankie I’d worn stinky Treehouse Dave Blue Bloods comes over he’s like a different different click you know it wasn’t like one of our stranger things try and he was like an ancillary character and so he made a convenient lie, let’s not leave let’s not let Dave boob lift up the tree and end and more like Dave boo but you can’t come he’s like I want to come up there I want to come be up in your tree house for like you’re not you’re not 52nd Street material this is what this is our tree and and he’s like I’m coming up or like suit yourself and I know it was like we this is where it gets sketchy cuz it’s like I don’t know if
okay 911 911 unless he grew up in New York yards in Wester right after you say he’s climbing up the saying I don’t know I can’t right I think I feel like when you’re a kid and you do you do fucked-up things like you know you feel so guilty that I think you can you whitewash UEI think you alter the memory because my memory of it is it was a total accident like a Wylie Coyote Rube Goldberg thing but I have a feeling from what I know of how evil children are that this was an intentional thing that we just didn’t anticipate like having a results that it did where there was like a two-by-four up there that was like just laying in it
and there was an incline and as as Dave bublitz’s forehead crested the the threshold coming up with this two-by-four in my memory just happened to choose that time to slide like right for it but I that’s why I’m like let’s be accountable and even assume with black washed if that’s the opposite of whitewashing this like history cuz I like I bet somebody was like you know like leg leg and it and it and it gave us squarely in the forehead and then I remembered this like he had this look on his face and then I remember the tiniest little red dot on his forehead like immediately start getting bigger and bigger and then and then and then he like fell and and and then started shrieking and we all like could clamber down out of the tree and nnn he’s like
Stan goes into the house he comes out with a lot of paper towels and he handed to Dave who like were like 8 years old or something like takes the paper towels and he touches them to his forehead and then he pulled it back and he sees solid red paper toweling and he absolutely insane and more so than you already had and any runs for his dirt bike and we all instinctively just run for a dirt bikes with a and just like give him a ineffective police escort to his home but he’s just streaking and there’s like paper towels like trailing like he’s just
and we’re all just like Blue Angels like flanking him
don’t like riding up the hill the Calumet and then like go is that screaming into her way so every every person weed whacking and stopping their weed whacking to see what’s going on I just a kid with bloody paper towels like fly my head as he gets to his home there’s our little Suburban front yards like he you know when you were a kid get your bike he just he just like gets to the front yard ditches his bike and runs as his mom comes out to the porch and and and into her arms with his bloody forehead and the end we all just kind of like like just kept writing
we just finished that we had one job just to see him home safe
permission to buzz the tower so so you you you are the part of the two-by-four you probably were I do I’m telling you what I’m telling you is my memory of it sincerely is that the two-by-four just like moved like I’m a forty-five-year-old man. What is the likelihood of that you don’t like like there was already is that that’s a hat on a hat as we say in the writers room like like like like there was already a story happening here and we’re like we were at we had malice toward this incursion and and so I just feel like weather or whether we thought it would like like we just have a feeling that we were like well let’s just do this as he comes up you know to like like like it’s my 45-year old like like you know so cynical suspicion and also
middle age of accountability like I’m going like how is out likely is it that that that my memory is actually altered Blade Runner style to remove accountability cuz I just got to like we almost remember like like deciding to and executing the strangulation of a friend who was I like like like like he was putting on his scarf we were like bundling up for winter and I was like six or seven I like and I was like to my friend said look Carl is putting on his scarf let’s go up and let’s just like you take one end and I’ll take the other at
what are you thought his head would get really small and go through the not like some kind of Jerry I don’t know me, Jedi I swear I don’t know I’d like I’d I know that I wasn’t thinking let’s murder a human being I know that I wasn’t thinking that I know I was thinking like like like like violence is fun it’ll be like a police academy screwin with the you know how much tighter than he’s going to make it at its own pace and me we grabbed one end and started pulling and Carl went like what do you do
a a a teacher came by and he was he was fucking purple and and and pulling as hard as you can it’s my remember yes it’s like not understanding like anything about 5
and the teacher who I was was kind of omnipresent like we could have been the first grade I don’t know how old you are in first grade like what do you say six other documents all the Ducks are kind of like she’s trying to do she was preoccupied for that sliver of time Jesus Christ do not leave kids alone I don’t leave me alone as a kid like I maybe I’m like I have a fucking kind of thinking like I’m hoping this is what I would do this and oh what am I thinking and stop but it sounds like you guys were like kept going yet here’s what I remember happening like is that the is that I remember that
teacher coming over and going like this is the strangest thing that I I mean it’s like I got an overhead of the coat room where the foyer is a kids in winter coats everywhere they’re all bundling up and putting on moon boots and half of them are crying we going to have them are allergic to cheese and you want to get that now and then till within this Mass hysteria like three kids rorrer doing this like weird thing it says I just I think what happened is the teacher somehow wasn’t conscious of the crime that was taking place she was only conscious of Carl dying and I think it’s just how long his scarf was that we were out of frame because it was Milwaukee and maybe his mother lovingly knit a very long Doctor Who scarf for him and then we were just like out of the teachers point of view and so she was only just like her shock the look
her face and the tone of her voice of Carl and and it was that’s what I and I was like oh loosen to think and speak so he couldn’t say these two people over here just trying to murder me
take them to jail call the police of his life did you did you just like like like oh man what happened are you okay oh yeah yeah yeah we stepped forward and said I introduced myself I feel somewhat responsible for this site see you’re overwhelmed mrs. But no we freaking packed up and walked her and walked away and never spoke of it never smoking again and in high school and I was like do you remember me almost murdering you I feel and he’s like no man I don’t remember that you want to get high you you I don’t like to work for NASA he was like a really cool funny guy like like in high school
funniest guy in his high school comedies for a team and then lake lake and was like really really like awesome dude that everybody liked but he kind of had this personality that was like oh man I always thought I’ll have to wonder forever but he forgave me the him that that I that I created for Dave me
who is the Blue Bloods was in the treehouse
I know their names sound made up but these kids so it was you Dan Harmon and who was on the other end while and I just got into the criminal is the last name cuz it’s Milwaukee so it’s some fucked-up what is it that you’re asking Rancheria friend cuz you said boom lifts and ramps talking and whatever and see and who’s Treehouse it was it was my pitch it was your pitch fine I’m just saying like you’ve noticed this we have like in the midwest we have screwed up my my my favorite name is one of his friends with a girl that where I went to school with her name is Missy pop and food
hottest girl in 8th grade and fourth grade Facebook and then people like type these names in an essay I have it I was really good friends with a guy named Brian schraufnagel until you meet Jeff at work come to the Los Angeles do you guys have weird names anybody anybody know
what’s that Tommy McRaney normal that’s your name
how many how much is a swear she has a friend named Pat Metheny there’s a guy that lived across the street from us his name was Gordie griepentrog
and he lived under a bridge you have to be a hockey player but I don’t know that you changed your name and shorten your name for Show Business
and it didn’t work
with all the good intention to Richard Pryor t-shirt in your ear that your full last name is trouble. All right sometimes oh yeah that’s right all right well anyways
but now he’s mr. mcfeely
you are wife sorry she had a lot going on
you are a girl you’re a girl in elementary schools that we were already practicing that Society like you at yeah you had multiple suitors as what you’re saying yeah you going to handle my situation with it without getting sweat shamed is like basically like a circular Network where I don’t piss anybody off and well as stuff and Tommy McPhee like how am I going to bag whatever your name is which we will we will let have me leave you to your privacy like detective series she was she was she was literally a little red-haired girl Charlie Brown reverse I went to call Mike used to take a 10 or pantyhose and then when you’re talking about
Three Stooges today I don’t expect you to know how to weave these Highway cones but
you going to keep it more Wonder Years than you
but I don’t think I ever actually talked to her I what I remember is that during attendance when my name was called she would look at me and giggle and when her name was called I would look at her and giggle and try and explain that to my mom and then she said that you got a girlfriend and I was like great that’s one less thing I feel like I have my memories but I just never fucked with it like I just like I’m not going to go talk to her now I was just like every morning and get this life partner
she did what she could she probably doesn’t remember but she she had an idea we were soulmates it was just bound to morning roll call
I think you’re doing a little bit of rewriting history with a little blue bloods may be here by 4 I think I think you were giggling the very soul of loathing like like like why would I cuz it would be such an unusual thing so it wasn’t like it wasn’t like I move we would make sense that I made that up if if the rest of the story was that I like a stalker kindergarten style in like wouldn’t leave her alone and stuff it at the reason why I did that is because I was getting green lights would make up the green lights but but I I Rue the way I remember it is that it was it was the perfect relationship never talked to her
and then yeah I know I was aware of the fact that they were lots and lots of girls that that had no desire to giggle and smile it’s okay it’s alright it’s not your fault you’re happy happy know you’re happy now
these people came out to see you
everybody just so tired you guys have been here all day long and how many beers have you had to have been consumed. It was there a bar here in
what one per person you only got the one beer
what you mean she gave you
okay I wouldn’t give you any there’s more where people there’s more beer there’s more beer
I don’t get it
we could have already reached under your seat
should we all just take a nap we can watch the stars giant bottle of Ketel One taunting you from on stage
maybe we should take a journey through space and I’ll do that by slowing the tempo down on this cord boat’s owner
give me a sexy lights up there
present
I made it when I actually change them instrumentation here to make this all better right we need less pick guitar maybe a little more sense
the universe
opens its arms to you
and you too Aunt
Sofia the universe
inside of you
the Beetlejuice nebula
folding outward
into the Horsehead spandex
in the constellation Agamemnon
orbiting Uranus and the ort belt
which I hear just had to add a new hole
getting a little fit in Milky Way
the universe is expanding
the carbohydrate complex
we are exiting now
what you know as the solar system
try to imagine scuse me I’m sorry what yes
stars are moving
yeah Shelby can we kill the lights that are all are those supposed I think if they haven’t been turned off by now in Santa Rosa Beach give me the subscriber yes
try to relax
understand that your mind is made of the same carbon as the Stars around you around you
you no longer crave heavy creams and sauces
saucy
cigarettes have no control over you
no control if no control no control do you have to have one next time I see another voice to the cosmos looks a little eager to get in here
you must kill Dave public cuz I’ve been really like that guy I don’t think we’re leaving those aggressions behind you are no longer a primate you are a kubricky in space baby
no more Ghazal femurs why do I live inside of a big old rectangle thing
planets closer patterns up there like a big old asshole
the monolith represents the golden ratio and the concept of geometry a human construct do you know why God likes that earn the most then
because if you like it you got to put a ring on it
moving past Saturn now
out into the outer Z okra Norbit
the home of Neptune
thank you yeah I can see some cook some Klingons on it do you know how Klingons get on Uranus the Captain’s Log
wow
they cling on
okay talk to you people
I’m sorry about that I snapped you Ernest just decided to fuck straight off into outer space
because we are departing
the birthplace of our primate bodies and rejoining our larger progenitor I can see my house from here
although we are moving away from the focal point you once knew is the origin we are actually moving toward the origin of all the created you as we move further toward the center of the cluster of star systems known colloquially as The Milky Way
the center of the Milky Way is a hot lustering
epicenter of chemical reaction
probably a big black hole and wishes it could suck every what are you doing are you almost done are you almost done I have to take a shit there’s more than one bathroom
this is the only man’s bathroom excuse me I don’t see the world through that lens
just hurry up this people waiting on their I’m dancing on one leg okay damn it okay like you’re just you’re leaving
there’s a urinal right here can I just go while you’re sitting at the yes I didn’t even go
let your mind we think I have a
I’m not talking to you
are you talking to me when he has a room for one more in here
does it say Jesus who
over the window there’s a second okay open a window to your house
what do you think is that what you think of that who you think going to be back in there slowly your drifting back towards your point of origin
as you feel your corporeal sentience coalesce
returning now to your original home however your journey has redefined you like your perspective like that
when you’re at the bank getting mad you’ll know remember I am but a speck on a piece of salt salt shakers then look at the Moon
image out tonight
soon we will colonize the Moon
5 hours before Donald Trump space force gets there
and makes a McDonald’s
don’t forget to wash your hands
Earth is you need to realize now having experienced the inky void you see it for what it is a unique gem
a science fiction of his own are you fucking kidding me you already used paper towels are you using the
it never never works
nevermind hey you know I can’t help it over hearing you’re doing a really good job you’re doing really good job there talkin talkin to on the toilet there enough you liking it a lot here let me give you my card
anytime you want to come over to
Pedro’s Pizza
you just you just you just chill my card you get it you get like a free chair
all right I better be going I can’t hang around here all day and not stopping you okay see you later
need to leave now ya got to go out to the Big Wide World
make my day here
Sia
I really thought something was going to come with that but what are you talkin about you hitting on me
doesn’t know I’m not don’t don’t worry about it I’ll take the card back if you’re not going to use it
thank you all right
you’re not that good at it,
slowly you approached Earth adamantine glass ceiling
that keeps those of us that are targeted
find to the Earth
well those that hover above it
orbit in predatory self-satisfied narcissism
looking down at us like
manic depressive Eagles
but you have a better perspective you’re on your meds
and as your therapist told you you’re getting your thoughts in order
and your roommate is a bitch so you doing it in a bathroom at a hotel
and that means you’re going to deal with other people that’s fine you’re patient your Cosmic you and body the universe your name is Michael but your pronoun is they
for you are Humanity
better
white
these are the credits rolling as he’s as he’s wiping it’s just a big white shot
wiping a word
more tempo
why don’t we go down like I said there’s nothing there
I miss my mother
go to E minor says the guy
oh yeah he was fucking right though
now you can really get up in there wiping it goes It goes like this from front to back
that was a pretty crazy that you are you in charge of the planets no just the sound okay
so it was God and me working together is this guy
do you want to do you want to play that clip in the movie Zapped with Scott Baio
the remake of it yeah there is a YouTube and there’s a modern Zapped but there’s also if you dig deep enough there’s a 1980s zapped with an actor named Scott Baio Who games actually name the famous lately and stuff like that scene where he could be aided by these two frat-boy like jocks and they tend to take their pants down their mocking him in the back of a convertible for us now get a load of this
and then I question his ass and it’s got Bale using the clip
they pull their asses out it’s a kiss this and it’s got me a look at the two girls with anger and a telekinetically makes their boobs pop out
#rape culture and then he he levitates to listen to this
sure they’re hovering upside down with their asses hanging out at the same clip yeah I like they they said is the guy that supposedly just keep food that address are you using
and the only thing that makes the boobs is that like the boobs you like a cheese this isn’t holding up to cultural shifts but but the balance is out because there’s so much footage of these two men’s asses but lately it’s like wiggling and jiggling with your friend and you’re being put in the tree with your pants down that you instantly go to a metaphysical place it’s a it’s a weird thing to subject like I’m sure the twelve-year-old the kids that are watching this movie when their parents are out of the room to see their first pair of naked hairy men’s assholes and disappearing the phrase is this God over and over again whether it will each like muscular rump is twitching over the trunk of a tree
you happened on both sides and they were in this movie which is why it’s kind of like there’s a lot of these restraints time five years ago was a strange time the rules are changing fast changing fast so that you can even put a bomb on a girl’s door any more crazy it look at it. We’re looking at behaviors that were once allowable fleetly acceptable a normal thinking about him now doesn’t even really matter what it what is the important thing is that right yeah I believe so I think you have a song about that don’t you I do
wow
he should have women sorry Mike thousand-dollar phone doesn’t recognize my thumbprint or me with my glasses on
it’s $1,000 because I’m wearing glasses
I use the password on your phone is like maybe you’re wearing glasses or outside
or maybe you just have a beard maybe you’ve grown your maybe your beer. So maybe you just had one to begin with and it hasn’t changed at all I can’t believe I’ll buy anything I’ve told you that my podcast if you at an airport make a Chalk Outline with a pile of human shit in it and you just and you just say poor people aren’t allowed to have this and I’ll like pay $10,000 to like eat the shit like I’ll just stand inside the circle and be like I’m unimportant I live I get to be in the circle they got to get what the fuk was that guy
I see everybody leaving
Lovett or leave it my eyes keep going to this guy’s face are you at you’re having a terrible time you’re you’re you’re here is a captive right I mean you didn’t certainly your worst nightmares talking to you Deadpool in heaven you talked to the guy that the Yankees hat hear what your uncle what’s your name sir
Anthony Anthony I like Comic-Con kind of things are like we promise we won’t will not make fun of you if you tell us the objective actual story about how you got here cuz I can tell it is not by being a fan of mine. I just want to know the step-by-step story of how you ended up with are you with are you with Deadpool he is he is he a relation of yours
so just so everybody knows his faces
that’s not. There’s a little chat no it’s it’s it’s it’s it’s
he says that is a good sport and it’s hitting you’re the only people whose lit right now
Anthony has your son Deadpool
Anthony is Anthony Junior
Anthony you dragged your father here is he is he enjoying himself clearly
that’s how I am
71 years old and ChapStick
and you’re proud of your son if you’re proud
I’m 45 how does it feel to get to an age of the kids Applause that’s got to be a little weird I was sitting by myself and I ordered a beer and she she said she said can I see some ID
discriminating right
25 is just having the time of her life she’s just like I would be hilarious if I carded Ian McKellen
I got I just realized said she walked away and it’s like wow I’ve yeah I mean I I don’t really I don’t mind dying again I remember it was very very difficult and I’m okay but it is just hard to what monitor these Milestone you said your age and then everyone applauded the subject was you made it
your father’s 96
dinner at 71 I’d be a party mad cuz he’s like a genetic like he’s carving the way for you I might might might might make Patriarchs kind of we don’t know how biologically what the expiration date is they tend to they tend to take themselves out with cigarettes and things with the style
I just mean they they they they don’t they even use the world around them they don’t they don’t they don’t just like sit there and like try to avoid dying they kind of like go ahead.
We brought him into the show I know I know I know
Dan doesn’t have a son and neither does Robin years Jeff new Dua
yeah that’s cool you right your birthday you you and your son can go out what Anthony Junior how old are you
I’m in the 30s okay
perfectly fine here you’re fine here I think no one’s like he’s at a convention this is where we come to bayscape that kind of pressure
well I mean she she affected me he said the bartender would have torn down it’s time I remember to get mashed a different times I think I think the objective is to the you got this big keyboard of buttons and like I think I think you want them all lit up before you die and like the ones that are lit up yet the first time they get pushed they it’s like Jesus Christ they go from not lit up to lit up and they said Monumental event and sometimes that’s traumatic it almost always is traumatic how many of them are just eating your first chocolate bar there’s like five of them the rest of them are trauma-based and then you’re like
put beers down on those buttons they’re already lit up they don’t toggle they don’t go off it’s called scarring objektiv is to like try to extend the metaphor I don’t think you’re able to like really push most of them are like most of those buttons are only accessible because other people have to push them they have to do with other people don’t you carry around like a towel like Arthur Dent for a long time when you were when you were younger yes I did yes I was very rude to Hitchhiker’s Guide and Deadpool little little little late to be so into something that you actually have a towel that you carry around but I went to a public high school junior high in there
there wasn’t a lot to distract me from now I didn’t dress like Doctor Who I dressed as like my version of Doctor Who like I had a USA cap and I would wear for scarves cut-off jeans two different pairs of shoes for scarves and what do you mean two different pairs of shoes you mean what you mean you mean a mismatch ground is there a side-by-side yeah and home from school and my mom would meet me with this look
why you so well at your gate the devil I don’t know he’s awesome Highlander Highlander when they push in and out during the wrestling game like the wrestling game that wrestling game
it’s very it’s a very nice energy it’s an intimate energy who here wants to share their like actually come up here and take the mic and share their story of like when they cross the threshold into alienation isolation nerd culture when there was no longer any hope for of of assimilation we’ve got to make it up here what’s your name
see if you can make it down without destroying the place like Rob when he came down
it was going to be great if it would have went off like rehearsal what did you want to fall down the stairs I know nobody wants to fall down well you can stuff like that Isabel everybody
came into this culture my dad actually brought me into this culture took you to a planetarium show let you dress as Deadpool and it was all downhill from there
so that means he can take you out of the sculpture
yeah everything I know so even Doctor Who o I go to who’s your favorite doctor
I actually met very good
I met everyone
hello from
once every now and then are you old school
no I meant like old school Doctor Who what do you mean by icon
oh okay and it’s for optometrist
I believe it
yeah I haven’t been there since I was six so glad you felt welcomed when you were in there that were your people your dad started taking you to kind of conventions like that was like like I need to cuz he was a buffy fan is that what what
is Star Wars Star Trek think of other stuff
we’re supposed to have Isabel’s by now if we were if we were adults if we lived anywhere but Los Angeles we would have lovely human beings that are joining the World As We fade Prince Edward
instead we’re buying Tesla has to try to hide her bald spot
we met my dad I Met Your Dad
really
I got the impression that you weren’t able to be here because he was like my daughter would be thrilled or whatever like he was taking pictures in there signing who’s the main guy taking picture yeah I mean I thought so
like like going to a convention and all of a sudden like it was like like oh like the absence of the kinds of things you felt Walking The Halls of your school where you were like it’s just like it’s like this Chiropractic ergonomic pressure like I can’t do nothing right around here like I if I answer a question even though I know the answer I know I’m going to do it wrong I’m going to get laughed at somehow or they just like everything is like these if you feel like you feel like it’s like the world is covered in in half full glasses at this table and every gesture you make knocks three of them over and you definitely don’t want to so then you started yesterday differently and then that’s funny and then you and then you go to for me it was gencon in Milwaukee like which was just didn’t do this role playing and paste the Indian stuff but it was just like oh God to see grown men and women wearing ridiculous
armor and end in end end
my mom my mom talked to me this stuff before that if my mom knew she said she’s like this kid collect stickers he’s like he’s not going to be a football star and it is your what’s the state of your parents marriage like historic with her mom
they’re they’ve been together the whole time
together they got married right before I was born so that’s how it’s supposed to work
my dad cell okay how is your relationship with a nerd stuff
she
is that is that a reference to the Copa from a Jewish wedding she said she’s going to hold the stand
so stand for photography she literally holds the light stand up the standard
but is your mom kind of like like you let me know whatever I’m prying or whatever I’m going to like exploit a horrible deep-seated like a personality conflict with your family you didn’t cause a break up but it is your duty to your dad’s a nerd let’s just put it that way is your mom like not a nerd is she
I think she’s late she watches murder mystery shows across over there like True Crime stuff I finally got ya like my girlfriend’s not into sci-fi and fantasy necessarily she’s into me being happy but like at the same time like she’s not going to by default when I watch a shity like Gil Gerard it is an astronaut in prison like but we don’t want I don’t like rom-coms but like we both like a real-life murder
because it started like as Extreme as normal life gets and I think I think that’s why I like Syfy is because it it it it heightens everything it stains the human relationships with iodine so you because every story in Star Trek is like will what who what is good and what is evil it’s like a it’s too nuanced in 27 Dresses so like a free I don’t need every nook and cranny of what Kate Hudson’s going through but like I like a guy like a guy to go like there’s an octopus monster on the poop deck of the Starfleet and the E only taste fear and he says you have a choice between killing someone you love and power in your rocket boots and then and now I’m starting to cope
do you know what’s what grade are you in
oh wow so you’re almost out
what are you going to do what are you interested in are you hate that question that you’re going to be like a keeper you’re going to be the only person that knows we did this before is there a certain time or place that you are most generous
history I find myself thinking about the 1930s a lot lately
I don’t know why
are you I just fine under sincerely a fan but just to keep running it over in my head is the she do anything creative as well
that’s the only way she needs dialysis or she would provide Sciences photographers that you don’t have to be such a visit over the phone
about your mom actually died that that that’s like her Specialties administrates dialysis like she puts the needle in and watches the
damn
I never seen some like like you watch that John Oliver show on HBO that as an industry like dialysis for for money and how it’s like like big dialysis play Glee Glee Glee people like like
yeah she’s like I want I would like I can’t remember anything about it except me out the idea that when there’s a whole industry where we get our blood changed like Jiffy Lube there probably like stocking your good blood and giving you back like use blood right
so do you want to be a teacher write blood
bright blood I wish if we could be so lucky to have Sprite like I do a little bit of the stuff anywhere it like oh no I feel like the belle of the ball in the suming a couple things here like you know like 85% or so of your student body here like aren’t you aren’t you a little when you think about being a teacher don’t you get scared or like like a list of then I have to like be the most hated person to these like morons that but you do you feel empathy for them and you want them to be smarter and
play smarter than know their history and don’t repeat it if you guys want to do another Gold Rush go ahead
there’s gold
call baby
and I do I put you on the spot but could you teach us some history
I just finished the whole u.s. history Regents okay
he’s going to give us a taste could you give me some space music and she can lay some history on me if you don’t feel comfortable telling that to drop
because I’m on your side and not trying to harm you just don’t talk to Sony Human Resources they’re just trying to protect their own legal department whatever you do
sounds like an arrow sit down and then you walk in
and again if you don’t want to just tell me and I will make this stop because I don’t want you to feel bad
yeah that’s great because you probably know that yeah
all right
sorry sorry we’re trying to do is show it’s not your fault cuz I’ll teach history and I will see if you can stand letting me do it here to dance the teacher and you’re like going to grade him right on housing a teacher teacher and I’m trying to pass on exams I can become a teacher and they’re the students that are like that I kind of money and now you’re going to leave and you want to make sure that your legacy goes on you you know you’re like this is the week he’s so give me a historical area
how about the 1930s
talk about the Great Depression right Great Depression what was so great about it I mean seem like everybody was pissed off I mean come on you can use that
the 1930s
saw the planet coping with a global economic crisis
still the aftermath of the Versailles treaty from World War I got that right
the biggest bear of the biggest Bryant being the
causes of World War 1 but let’s not throw anyone under the bus Germany
in the streets of Berlin you could take a stack of German money and it was more valuable as a doorstop that it was legal tender rocks were worth more money than money
and the world didn’t care you didn’t cry out from from from Germany we got a pretty bad over here we’re really broke like no one’s going to go boo hoo for the people that were spiked helmets look like Darth Vader minus the skull and invented mustard gas or caused us to invented I don’t know
World War 1 was really bad
World War 1 was so bad that it defines everything up to and including World War II
the 1930s the bridge between those times. The entire planet going into a right-wing slide people are starting to get into this thing called nationalism why is my country anyone else’s business why isn’t it me versus the other countries how do I know what other countries have my best interests at heart maybe I should stockpile weapons maybe I should put a tighter stitch on immigration and maybe I should industrialize institutionalize even nationalized some of our cheaper institutions may be there’s people in this country already that I don’t really like the way they got here in the first place to why are they in control of the Garment District
why are they all invited why do they get to Banks why do they get to Jim and why do they get to get their fingers in these pies and in every country throughout the world scapegoating can you starts to get this Friday
see if scapegoating of the ceiling in the borders you have the stockpiling of arms and you start to embrace hierarchy there’s an authoritarian instincts inside of all of us
when times get tough and confusing the easiest thing to do is to be told what to do you want Simplicity you don’t want complexity when your family is hungry and when the issues are being brought to the your face every day of getting a firehose of information I needed you here down the street this person thinks that they have the right to do this when I don’t even have a job and when those things happen we look for charismatic people
even if they’re not charismatic the way we left our friends to be charismatic even if they’re the leader version of charismatic people who made me say the things that we don’t want to say to our daughter is at the dinner table because we know they’ll make us feel stupid or angry or hateful we want someone to just say it really loud so that agreeing with them can be as easy as saying nothing at all and then all the countries start doing that we do it over here we do it over there Europe is concentrated in that landlocked portion these people when we walked away from World War 1 and entered all of our depressions we let them you know what the bill because they they were to blame
so they stockpiled more Weaponry because you can convert your entire economy into a up receivable profit if you just say will fuck are dollar let’s just say your job is to make a tank and I’ll buy it I’m your country where Enron so
you just making more tanks and the others treaties you agreed to that said you wouldn’t do that but everybody’s got their own problems and everybody’s isolationist and everybody’s National is so what voting part of the public is going to go yes I agree I sent her I think we should spend our time monitoring Germany and making sure they don’t do things we should definitely pay a lot of attention to that huge threat that is that weird guy with that weird haircut who is threatening everyone and saying that he deserves to be on the global stage you’re going to get a lot more sympathy going fuck that who cares even maybe some people go you know what I like to put in that guy’s Jim he’s making the trains run on time fuck you Senator you’re not real elected
and so it’s like a system that it just slides and slides and slides and it lasts years and years and years and it isn’t the pendulum that swings it’s not like a sine wave it’s a it’s a it’s a linear amp that just mounts like the flu it just keeps going and going all the countries keep stealing up and stockpiling and Miss trusting and then they start the frenzy dalliances oh I’m friends with this person because the enemy of the enemy is my friend who is who’s to say that this murderer isn’t cooler than you at least they’re clock is bigger at least their missiles are stronger I like them I like you too let’s take pictures together oh I love it oh no I hate you who I’m going to go to work. Just kidding
as long as the poor people aren’t storming our castles and hanging Us in the marketplace
who cares
so the stockpiles continue to stockpile and then there’s an incident something happens in World War 1 it was whatever his name was Archduke Bishop Apostle foot little Lord Fauntleroy
was murdered
but yeah I was only supposed to talk about the thirties in the thirties or simply just you know there’s this kooky guy in the in the in the Europe who no one has the energy or the international effeteness to bother to police starts you know saying well maybe we should be here maybe we should be there maybe the whole problem is that we’ve been denied our natural right to be everywhere and so you don’t argue with, and you let him an Axe and you let him do stuff and meanwhile in the cities where it’s happening where there are no cameras
people are being categorized sorted if you say this then you’re that that makes you this the media very simply just it’s either state-run or it’s fake news it’s just something that isn’t supposed to be paid attention to back that it was as easy as taking a Molotov cocktail going into the local printing press and kicking it over buying it stealing a beating up the guy that ran it
but the bottom line is you take control the media you control the truth everybody that lives within each boundary
they only know one thing which is in everybody’s out to get them and then they know Pride they know uniforms they do parades colors speeches amazing simple things like oh my God it’s been so complicated I’m so tired of being embarrassed at parties so tired of being told on this a phobic and that a phobic and that I owe this person this even though I barely have that God what if it was the truth what if the truth was so simple what if it was just that everybody that doesn’t look like me and wasn’t born where exactly where I was born is a piece of shit out to get me and they just need to be rounded up and sequestered I’m not going to do anything bad to them I don’t wish any harm on them I just want them out of my fucking business out of my face out of my restaurant I don’t want that I don’t want them in my life and my cabinets are in my parliament’s I just want them to be like why can’t they take care of themselves what’s the big fucking deal everybody just is out for them
self like I just want to lick lick lick I just want Simplicity to tell anyone want if I see a cookie on a plate and I don’t eat it I’m going to come back and it’s going to be eating I’m going to eat it now and the guy stands on the balcony and he says this is what I’m talking about like if you trace everything back we invented it all where the fucking Kings and we have been denied this there was a golden age don’t pin me down at it I’m not a historian or anything I’m just a boring her I’ll just tell you over and over again back then there was the simple time you know what I’m talking about you were 10 years old one didn’t feel simpler then didn’t feel like there was truth and false witness why is it so complicated now earrings in the tattoos and the biracials of the Trans Am at and what’s with all these Facebook business fuck this I want to say Merry Christmas I’m going to say Merry Christmas all the Day Parade in the missiles just
piling up and then eventually
you know we get to 1939
and the guy that’s never been told no
is only going to do one thing not going to be to take a timeout
he’s tried everything he could fucking do as I like he’s still hasn’t been told now he’s still haven’t been challenged not by his own people not by anybody on the global stage so you start going big you do one big thing and then we see how people respond
and I think that is that a Polish thing is that the invasion of Poland Maybe
the Blitzkrieg now yeah
all right so I take it from your not interrupting me that I kind of nailed it okay alright
be brittle McGriddle
hundred Jesus I mean I don’t think he used to not it was Civics out of a out of a thousand there’s a lot of dates in history sports car now
World Cup Edition Manheim is going to break down the World Cup standings for you right now had a big day of the world cup and then I was going to give you all the Jays highlights and he we got coming up in The Knockout stage
well America has been seized as they are every time this. With FIFA Madness
the federal International Football Association is on fire this is a global sport every country’s got a team and right now we’re at the World Cup time World Cup mean it’s sort of the start of the World Series of Poker Face chances going forward
I mean USA
yeah I’m taking them out you know I got I don’t think we should even consider them in the running I mean this is a Powerhouse the blues the blues
they’re called the blues yeah well I mean look I rather you were in a veritable lather about the whole video assisted replay thing now they can go back and look at penalties in soccer used to be about the garbage the yardage
and now you can make a c g line on the field and you can know exactly when Luis Suarez biting someone I went, so I guess I’m for it I like I think there should be more accountability there’s a lot of drama out in that field people faking injuries and rolling around in Austria when the when the Swiss team what team beat the serbians there’s to switch players who are of Albanian who are from Kosovo I mean the switch are going to perform exactly the same way every year
like clockwork
what they do
I think I think I don’t even think they care about soccer I think they use it as an opportunity to do metal promotion for their clocks
sports car all right
Isabel you can give a college in mind or is that too early to touch today
you shouldn’t need any
I remember there are a lot of it when I go to when I was an eleventh-grade it started with that you got to write a letter to your Colour there was like a lot up there was so much pressure on the college thing that it it really kind of like I think it’s why I dropped out immediately so I think it’s good that you take it like that you just like that you know the day you wake up and going to college of your choosing to go to college because there was so much from from the age of 15 for me I didn’t even apologize like some religion it was like not a real thing I kept thinking it was a thing that happened after high school where I would and I was basically like John Hughes movies and things are going like oh I’m going to then cut classes and and party and be like an adulterer like Paper Chasing to have arguments with the professor and and then I went in and I kind of want to be a college and I dropped out so I mean I think it’s better that you’re not you’re not under the so much pressure that you can like look at it like a thing you want to do
it’s the worst podcast ever to listen to right
I’m not fishing for anyting
really listen to a lot of podcast
me neither. Well I mean the plug
adulthood rate I’m going to be an adult soon she in in photography if anyone wants to contact John Sheehan and
if he’s not busy he’ll answer you what’s in it what’s the name of the company again
damn you want to hear those jingle so you can make like a GMC in photography is a world of cameras true selection and the cameras just for you
John Cena and we’ll take to the camera and point it at the stuff it looks through a hole in the back of it and that will be on JJ’s in photography in the wonderful world
we are Mike crivello some money
hopefully no one from my Crivello’s photography will it be listening to that jingle as a place where you could buy cameras and then I kind of corrective the butterfly and said he’ll look through the hole on the other side
Isabela moner
I don’t even have I have the eye of the tiger
how do you give us out they come out right give it away take it back I’m going to have a heart attack if I’m 71 years old my name is Anthony Howe
my name is Anthony do you like a blowhard asks I just want to live another day my dad turned 96 the other day I’m trying to make it that far I can’t wait to get to my car I’m feeling the keys in my pocket you suck
oh shit is cool
we have so much Lighting in this sit down
Anthony you’re going to love this
Anthony I want you to buckle your holyshit belt because it’s about to get fucking nerdy if you thought the last 90 minutes was inaccessible
imagine a wheelchair ramp made of knives and puppy bones
do you work for the cell
east coast rap that it is the actual football
you don’t like crap what do you like what’s your what’s your music
50 smoke blues or is that like genuine folk like you’re like like like like as soon as Bob Dylan steps in your like this is starting to sell out a little bit like Jimi Hendrix my favorite folk singer
what do you think about what do you think what do you think
I thought he pretended to be gay to get out of the army
I am
the Lakers game
Jennifer combat
but that’s what I always use reverse psychology if I was in a draft I go to the Army and I’d say listen I want to fight so bad my leg is gay for the Army like I can’t wait to get out there and fight but then one of my legs is just regular
so I don’t know what to do I don’t if you want me to running in circles
but it would you know just like I should just stay home
I just not a coward but I shouldn’t fight in a war is what is my smash ypu with a shaved head and a full military fatigues on my legs cut off
where are the Obamas straps to buy a big drop out the bomb bay doors cuz it seems like a polarizing figure do you like Bob Dylan and you respect him okay pretty simple stuff he said yes there are some people out there that are like he was more of a simulator I like that like he’s he was like you like Joni Mitchell Anthony
she’s entertaining on the folders your character
G & D is a lot like folk music
there’s a young man and Garfunkel The Ginger Master used is like the Woody Guthrie by Rob hello Steve bringing him stuff did he ask you for that yeah oh my phone was going off and you were worried that something bad was like important I was just I was born down the road from here you know that you were white oh yeah Mineola Long Island
I mean like he’s an island baby was way too long
what were you guys talking about how much time do we got 20 minutes great that’s awesome well worth 30 trillion years depending on which metric you want to use my Little Anthony’s receiving the slowest show of his life he will be 71 when he gets out of here
when heat when he came here he and his father were the same age
when he visits his father he will be 96 years old where have you been I’ve been traveling and I was in a podcast traveling at the speed of boredom
you have anything that would show that I’m public has a better idea that he would travel at the speed of light and then you like your twin brother and you come up with more like when I was a kid to PBS shows explaining relativity with use it to like these kind of like time traveling scenarios where an astronaut would go up and travel the speed of light and come back home and what was that movie where the guy goes the kid goes into the spaceship in the spaceship has like an eyeball in its voice the spaceship yeah sorry I don’t think it was
I don’t think so I don’t think so hunt ya know what was the name of the movie with the eyeball in spaceship they’re shouting Flight of the Navigator and you’re just provoking the word and they will it’ll be like World War Z Eli closest tell Aviv like I said yeah and I swear to God I landed on this fucking plane II plane touchdown I was Furious I was like God fucking damn it we got off the plane we went to the bathroom I start ripping a God damn towel toilet dispenser off the wall or the toilet paper dispenser I’m like pulling it off the wall like why isn’t coming off the wall and then like what are you doing it’s cuz of that urine color do it because a New York
yeah I don’t know what it is but Connecticut
it’s all right I got it I mean that’s the Florida Jersey
Rhode Island Rhode Island fuck you Rhode Island
you guys pay an ounce of attention to my history lesson here you go again
I spent a brief recap
last time on harmontown yesterday yeah you guys didn’t hear any of this
what happened you guys use you found patches gym
but you blocked patchin’s I was I was riding this is my turn I was trying to help there’s a fire in town that was happening because you guys started a fire in town to to escape and distract them from you guys trying to kidnap one of the most important figures of town so the fire was happening and you guys were missing patches but you had patches gem which you had gotten to give back to patents
so you look for pageants in the town that was on fire but being on fire you got distracted by the fire and started fighting the fire will kind of you were looking for patches while everyone else was fighting a fire and you didn’t want to be distracting so you’re like let’s pretend we’re fighting a fire while we’re interrogating the City Creek Fire
everybody
set New York
yeah. I got the fire out myself got on top of Burberry Mac because I had a magic purse with water symbols on it and I was I was we were I was riding the bear around a burning building going
nnnn quite successfully putting out a lot of the fire I said you put out the fire but you didn’t say who and you didn’t say how right there’s a recap
what do you think Anthony tracks right okay alright for a living
what do you do for a living
gas stove microwave parts that go on satellites and Military missiles I don’t think you’re supposed to go really wow okay
I’m kind of embarrassed that we’re up here and he’s here every week I see a lot of respected speakers do you own on the building
okay see you see your your engineer then no
engineering assistant fantastic
Ihop near me
Give me the antonym of Anthony is a shambling mound of weeds Road on top of a talking bear playing everything put out a fire and no you didn’t or welcome you’re welcome you’re welcome they look like an angry mob
even though. We can help put out the fire the fire you started after kidnapping the town mayor
to put it
here here give him a break listen to that guy the mayor was the head of the theater yeah you guys didn’t ask but yeah yeah I thought he was the head of the Theatre Company did we beat him up in my living room yeah yikes is he still in my living room you don’t know he probably is he escaped
I read saying this out loud in front of the the the angry mob yeah they’re just watching you okay there is been a regime change in your town you have lost your way politics ran rampant and became the new religion now religion will recalibrate wheel of shrove but he got a little full of himself admit it Kevin
I talk to Darlene a plumber she said that shrove wouldn’t let her have a part-time job and feed her family I talked to a nurse and said she has to work part-time as a webcam girl
just to just to make just to make buckets
this isn’t working and no it’s not it’s an acronym stick and it’s uncharismatic
what what if we have does Jem we have like we have something valuable all the better reason to run yeah I give it one last chance I go listen everybody if someone doesn’t tell me right now where passions is
it’s going to be hell to pay
we’re going to bring the fucking Sunday he’s going to relight the town on fire you’ve seen what we can do
what episode was there a question there tell me where somebody here tell me where no one knows who that is
Run play Fireball
executive produce Flame
he’s got he’s got to have that
I produced when all right you toss a few fire blobs one of them lands in a dry field that hasn’t been watered
you’re going to deny this in your history books but the truth is you did this run run I jump on Gary’s back okay most of the town’s resumes started fighting the fire but what is the RS3 bulky looking farmer looking dudes just tear ass after you though they’re just chasing you you make it out of the town and they’re still chasing you I take my bow and I am at them and I’m a shoe from Garry shandling’s back okay want to do anything while you’re running away
her friend’s name are overreacting friend who knows. So you’re running away you hear the hoofbeats Smashing of oh my gosh of a definite see this is why I meant to mention this recap also while you were trying to convince everyone to stop the fire Geffen from the church came and started murdering people in you you kind of have to stop him but now he’s back murdering people have an agent orange or yeah that’s a great way to look at it and what if it did
do I successfully hit one of the farmers
you were okay I feel bad he said he was in the eye
automatically where you do them
oh my god did you did you see actual combat where you
he keeps getting cooler this is insane it’s been 2 hours and he’s only gotten cooler all right if my joke didn’t traumatize you nod your head
you can’t blame him people will turn on me
I’m truly sorry if cuz I didn’t realize any personal experience that you had like like that would make me feel terrible just let it go
I’m accountable and I fucking by pivot
Escaping The Town
did DJ just fired up about right yeah you always DJ loose loose an arrow it’s hard to do because you’re on the back of a biped running hell yeah alright you miss thanks I’m just impressed I was even able to get it off
hey I’m Gary what I’m sorry I’m diarrhea
everyone is a skeleton deep down
I love that optimism
all right knowing that I’m not going to be able to run faster than Farm hands I stopped and face them all right
gentleman
the wrath of God is not something we walked away from
all right one of them stabbed in the chest with a pitchfork
you’re wearing armor that song You Take 5 damn it Carlos.
Gary turn around we got to go back and help our friends hold on let me to make a right turn here that’s cool you’re doing one that’s not stop to write summon Nature’s Ally
I think you’re out of that where’s Bernie Mac and all this fence here right now I think you what level spell sheleighly it better be then you have that’s your last spell left if I’m okay I go see Layla and I just got I just go full-on numb Druid sheleighly attack all right you can’t sheleighleigh and it makes your staff turn into a sheleighly that’s what she said
that’s certainly a level 1 spell hammer on a nail
or I could go to a hardware store
I attack the nearest Pho you got a cast in first magic bro you got a plan ahead know it fully cast
it’s great shrub I use one of my feets I like leave at the closest one I clean them all right good shambling Mound cleat swinging Mighty Haymaker you smashed the guy in the face but it’s not enough to kill him so it doesn’t leave does he he takes 14 damage
I’ll take it
he drops to his knees like stunned and dazed like dizzy with their weapons they’re just kind of knives like kitchen is not even like daggers and they start attacking at you guys but yeah it is that’s what you notice all right somebody says something witty because the show is basically over
you get stabbed in the face oh no that wasn’t worthy enough or I burn through all my credibility with the audience I can’t tell it will all morning because I Morningstar one of these fellas oh yeah
the guy is still days from the from the impact from the shambling mound and you write it very easy to drive your Morningstar into his head if you do you have free will lay you choosing these actions the choice is between getting stabbed with a butcher knife or killing a farmer that weapon is a butcher knife with a pyrrhic victory or an actual desk
I open up my glass jar of Dracula
yeah you open it okay my glass jar of Dracula Ash and I just start throwing it in the air like confetti and going all right it’s great everyone starts coughing
Cliffhanger okay
but you set my timer buddy all right have a Cradle of Aviation Museum thank you Anthony Junior and Anthony the third taking it down there and helping us out
you guys are wonderful I thought it was a it’s been a long day, needed in a wonderful intimate little Spalding Gray show I like that getting splashed by The Rock Drive everybody
Speedway near me
Frederic Remington
not game
set you put my child
drive fast to take Kansas
go to my grandpa’s we’re Marines
Let It Go Dan Let It Go