Episode
Episode: 12 – Death, Fascism and the Pursuit of Not Remaking Robocop
Description
Special guest Greg Proops returns! The question of what happens after you die remains unanswered, but tangents include mental illness, poverty and misunderstood Van Halen lyrics. Meanwhile, in D&D world, Sharpie and Quark claim their Embermauler bounty, buy horses and do improv in a forest with an old unicorn friend.
Transcript
Benjamin harmontown is now in session
oh you lucky turd the business
we got to go to going to start being tonight please keep the emotional tie their hands clap
come quietly or there will be entertainment
RoboCop the original RoboCop
I’m going to go to my grave protecting its Vision sick of it so the RoboCop photos of the guy looks like Batman looks like Batman Batman sick of it I don’t care who’s sick of hearing about it sick of this new Robocop shit it’s a good movie that’s as good as Casablanca remake those things are going to be offended if you try to remake them just because it’s about a Robocop
does it mean you’re allowed to just go over there and pee a little bit and see what what what takes you wouldn’t do that with it with it with a so-called classic film talking about what is black and it’s Rubber and he’s walking music at you know that there’s going to go I’m RoboCop’s Prime online my prime directive is to get jiggy and he’s going to jump in a CG thing up two towers and off of a roof and Legoland is going to look like Spider-Man and you’re going to go why is that Robocop Robocop the tank RoboCop was awkward RoboCop was an original concept RoboCop was a guy in cayston ridiculous silver metal I don’t want to get off on on a lot of tangents tonight
again the Hallmark of Hermantown Focus I want to focus tonight’s theme is
it’s going to look at my cell phone
let’s diagnose me
chili vet in the past and maybe I have Asperger’s I don’t know if I do or not having met Adam Goldberg who’s a frequent attendee of our Adam say something just to support my case you can tell he can feel it okay all right now and maybe I don’t have it
am I bipolar I don’t know why did you say why were you so confident that I wasn’t that I’m not bipolar
between everything you do the
just entered into the realm of what the fuk was that where you and that you seem to be an expert in bipolarism
one we see him sometime
maybe you’re bipolar no no no don’t throw me under the bus cuz I feel like I’m in a good mood tonight and then sometimes I’m sad but that’s everyone that people don’t know what to call this but you have certain superpowers and any superpowers going to give you a deficiency in some other way like for instance we know that whatever my power is it takes away from bathing
do you know what this is why I don’t go to a therapist is because there is it doesn’t stop me if you’re going to like 11 therapist is that I was Googling a random like what’s wrong with me what is what is my exam what’s my itis around and I am typing in symptoms like psychologically I want to know solve me help me lift the hood like like Optimus my Prime and the point I found a thing that matched a lot of my symptoms it used to be called Christ complex but then because that’s to Western they started calling its superiority complex that’s what I stopped believing in Psychology because you wish you could diagnose everyone that’s better than you
fuck you I’m not fool me three thousand times
that’s amazing that’s not fair you think you actually better than people or do you think that could be alright fine who did who are people that you think are better than you that you wish like that they have skills that you wish you had the Coen brothers and Robocop and grapefruit to is our guest tonight tonight
and I wanted it I wanted to be a surprise I wanted to surprise you guys I popped it but I thought that was odd if if the reason you’re here tonight will have to have at the word this carefully because you all love Greg everyone should love Greg but a plot of the if the Clincher for you coming tonight was that was that you knew Greg was going to be here
I’m just saying like like you going to promotional value out of saying Craig proof is here but here’s what I wanted I wanted to play Dungeons & Dragons tonight and have to have other and getting it really dire circumstances like being a real Dungeon Hard Rock place and and and then and then come in like a reminder do so in three days and and just mail us out
really having a wife beater on
there was also a show called Laverne & Shirley in Laverne & Shirley was spun off of Happy Days Gary Marshall produce both of them Carmine Ragusa was the like sexy guy on Laverne & Shirley so he became a part of the happiness mileo they did a episode of Happy Days where Richie was supposed to fight some bullies and then van showed up and then everybody they had their own gag and then there was the scene where they make these bullies were like nothing you heard, and reduce dust by Sky
shoes at NFL has 47 year-old man like a side of the stage and the audience with nuts cuz it was Carmine from a different state, it was also successful it was a golden age of TV was amazing we can add it all this explanation. It would never happen so much I’m sorry you guys you guys missed a lot by being 25 you didn’t you think of that you get more you get less I’m going to die another going to be 10 years after I died when it’s just a hot and there’s just Locust that’s it and maybe a couple Holograms deal herbal that’s all I am is it was just going to be a statue of a guy that invented Holograms
and it’s going to turn but it’s going to snow in order to make sure you know it’s a hologram is going to have to go
every you know you know that you know that
fucking dicks is it time to diagnose you after that ranch
alright let’s let’s bring a surprise guest to the stage mr. Greg proops
I love you to try to recreate it will just make the same thing happen all over again I’m on my way to depressive reactive a romantic evening but you don’t get mad at you active.. Where you like right 20,000 pages of dialogue yeah okay so I can
the best part of manic depressive is the beginning Maniac the high tonight I’m like manic tonight I feel like even though there are nights when I come up here and we’re doing this once a week now there are nights when I come up here and they far outnumber this type of night there are nights when I come can I go what am I doing what am I doing this it’s a justifiable question why why did they pay $10 it doesn’t make any sense what am I supposed to do except honestly express in fact that I I I don’t belong up here and I hate myself another nights like tonight when I’m like Robin Williams on my God
but yeah something’s wrong with me I think it’s what I wish I had more hyper I think I’m more than anything else even though I’m pretty high for I don’t have the periods where I write the novel and then you do and that’s what I wish I had
I don’t have to. Do I make everyone around me happy quick quick change over you after I show you but you’re on the road all the time I got you am so you you love the the Acclaim and the why don’t you get to the Acclaim I do it because of Edith Piaf
because of the arch but claimed as nice to me that the difference is I’m not a lawyer you know what I mean for a tax collector I’m not a vino member of society I’m not a public and you know that people come up what what’s the word in the Bible where they are render under Caesar and all that you know I like one of the disciples is a tax collector for the Romans because they farmed it out and people are bummed when they see you if you’re a lawyer or you’re a dick head like I saw Karl Rove in an airport and I was like
you know what I mean I didn’t go like I was here this is awesome
now there’s two people usually happy to see you cuz you’re Canadian so they associate you with a moment of joy in their life as opposed to Oh I thought you and you raise my fucking taxes in 87 I was finding out it illegal to have a right knee all I want to do better and it certainly will be October by the time you’re hearing this podcast October and if you care about this podcast that you dress like Jared from the Labyrinth for Halloween that’s David Bowie’s character from The Labyrinth
dressed like him for Halloween to talk about before we play dungeon dragons talk Apple Friend Finder
and life after death
one in the same
guys guys are all signed up for your friend finder app use a new Fun Finder I signed up because of you you invited me so now I know at all times that you are at home and do you know is that the dryer I thought it was the year for you to actually like I’m probably going to turn it off your location thing is I don’t have a girlfriend you do if I had a girlfriend and I could see where she was at all times I pull out my brains out but you don’t have a girlfriend do you have a girlfriend you’re going to destroy your relationship with each other are going to destroy I am like I like that she could see where I am you going to it’s going to destroy you all right
next song
what’s your next week is a reason why we try to make that you’ve been a real treat dispenser everybody a dungeon master extraordinaire we have a we have a dungeon master whose bearded ponytail and I got a bag full of dice and the ongoing saga in the campaign of a lot court and Greg Smith made a late entry as a as a unicorn character last time
alright Greg what do you think happens after you die you mean in this game of Dungeons and Dragons after we die I haven’t the slightest notion I hope that it’s a fantasy world of what you wanted in your life it if there’s any justice and I know this is going to sound wildly sentimental to discard of youngsters bad as I want to be with my wife after I die I mean
i v heard around the world
I hope it’s fun after we die I hope it’s not a terrible you know I can the Sci-Fi movies where you wander through Universe were clocks flyby and then there’s an odd random joke and then a book and a dude in 18th century with a wig on comes by and you like was that cold it right that’s the seventh time I’ve seen Taft were they supposed to talk him into eating less
I like the Elysian Fields in a Greek mythology part where it’s just that you know internal rivers and fruit and what not and I would like her to be a big bag of weed that just never goes down to the beach and do it in like a fucking still the same level instead of that disappointing oh fuck I’m down to the last one I wonder if animals like there’s got to be an animal that sinks while it’s dying. I’m dying. We we we think about the big difference elephants are and that’s how we express the fact that we think about the back door dying we bury each other and with odd is that neanderthals buried each other which we are not in the end Earth all swear not to send it to of them were cousins of them the same way we were of chimps and gorillas accept whatever we are
make no goddamn sense I kept making the NFL pons and Cro-Magnon puns and it was I would make up your mind we’re human beings we descended from
caveman was that they had a lot of makeup and teeth and they couldn’t enunciate net and their places of work really should have just made it a multi-camera sitcom the pilot of cavemen that wasn’t the one they are the one that got a picture of it was just flagrantly racist to racial but like you have big dicks and dance really well.
it was it was pretty on the nose it was it was an hour off and name stuff like AJ and Scuttle bucket and what not what you’re saying bro go to Rachel allegory I agree that people think is racist or is it people thought it was hacked to keep going to that well and I think I haven’t watch the pie out I was like we get it
after world can exactly what do you think this is my biggest fear.
I take poops his answer who cares who knows who that we don’t know but the thing that terrifies me is something that this this stuff that my original dungeon master Graham said at one point when we were in high school he said well when you die
your awareness
gets bisected
moment-by-moment and you become the moment before your death as you approach it it gets increasingly small sit and if you cut a number of that measures time in half you can cut it in half an infinite number of times which means that the moment you die you may have the last thought that you ever had forever according to you
that that bummed me out like I was 17 right now for the next five hundred fifty million years still a good graham cracker that’s hell that’s hell
I like Michael Keaton in my life like that movie fifty years ago people died a lot younger.
wait wait did I ever tell you the story of the strawbs interpretation of the you know that Major Tom song that the that the 80s version of the Major Tom song at one point Ground Control 6 hey are you still up there and Tom who’s in space says send my wife my love then nothing more that’s what narrator saying there was nothing worth talking about that song with strap and she has like a badass man in the ribs you know it’s like it’s not Citizen Kane but it’s like Kevin Kline & Dave you know it hits the spot
and and he’s like yeah yeah I know it’s just like the guys out in space and he’s about to lose contact and the last thing you thinking is don’t fuck my wife and I said what is like now it’s like give my wife my love then nothing more like
quotation marks and going out into space as I give my life my love the horny bastard I know she’s hot
my favorite is our friend Matt Young thought that you know the song Panama by Van Halen oh yeah, break down between my legs he’s the seat back my friend Matt Young thought it was his favorite song and I can’t blame him when he thought the lyrics were reach down between my legs he’s the seed bag bean-bag to imagine
the idea that they would have had the imagination to Stacey that bag
if you had one you need to eat it with me awhile cuz what I mean sometimes you have to ease the seat back
everybody Central American country Jeff you’re sick of us bill in all your colognes all over the place you hate liquid clones that correct it’s my Nemesis it’s the thing that gives me nightmares if you’d be so kind as to recap and take us up to date where we are in the campaign when we last met Our Heroes were in a Tavern
they were hearing some rumors about a building that was rumored to be from the Amber Muller rumor and it’s pretty meta in pursuit of the Beast they set off after talking to an old man about his burned Farm by ended up in a burnt field where they saw almost miraculous site a unicorn
Tylenol with codeine was a wonderful unicorn
for Fox sake
and with his help they defeated the Amber Muller then they return to turn in their quest to Ferris the captain of the warden’s so you guys were just talking to Farris last and what Hawthorne what’s it called Thorndale Thorndale you may come back so I Carmine Ragusa and they run fast they can just come in anywhere who knows you guys when your characters yes
five or seven times and I still have no idea what goes on I’m totally lost the first one I had to remake it and left it here at the thing guys don’t fight
all right so you’re just talking to Farris you had just gotten 1400 gold pieces from him as a reward
go enjoy your reward you have slain the Ember law and you have shown most bravery in such circumstances let me leave you one last Tankard of Ale before I take my leave. Pretty cool I don’t know I feel like you and I need to level up make out
I know how do I level up I don’t know what you’re talking about who should I’m going to are we are we are we in that Tavern Spencer cha cha Z their Chacho’s there
good good tip on a $10 and yes I heard you took him out very impressive you have any help well yeah we have a unicorn drop by for a while to make sure where that got us but it we certainly got out of there alive was it Tylenol with codeine
Tylenol with codeine watches over the county Forest to the South maybe we should go hang out with him because you had a unicorn sit on your head for a half an hour. You never go back
was that like a day’s walk to the South
Cha-Cha what what what’s what’s what’s in it for us if we go down to the South and hang out with the Unicorn weird weird what’s in it for us to ask
find gentlemen’s race car gentleman place we’re not open or not in inventory
can we get some horses yes there’s a there’s a stable a bit south of the tavern called coram’s horses occur as Horses
I’m playing Korn in this Dungeons & Dragons I’ve been dead for 37 years now I love you and to have and have not
hey did you haven’t got any money for a drink a beer
all right and I only got one I got this and then I got this tiny gold I smile I’ll take the goat
you can have these for free where you bound South to the forest what about you I’ll take the Appaloosa
what happen if she’s already saddled up and I put them in there for years
you can just make sure it up
examine the emerald
straight so drunk Sharpie dagger has a silver handle with a gold pommel if that’s a thing that nice halves or Dare season 3 years ago this very nice
people taking for the forest too but he never got there boating did you say
but maybe he shouldn’t have given you that dagger do head Dragon will come in handy shirt. I think it’ll be good luck for you good on you get out of here
after being slapped in the butt by the the horse owner the horses take off towards the forest thank God the 1930s of creeping me out
you reach the forest as Dawn is Breaking
you’re at the edge of the forest the path delves into the trees I examine the path the path seems of solid construction well-traveled I fucken love you so much
I examine the bathroom up a series of solid Construction
people walking on it have given this path a solidly constructed feel tight with the years gone past
several thousands of feet made by either side of it then on it as walking upon walking has resulted in less growth.
I think a lot of people have Walk This Way to pass the yellow can see but perhaps if you get farther away from the path you might find another way in Friday I hear fairies
fairy I’m a guardian
we approach the guardian has been well packed
cowboy
one of these guys look like you guys especially Sharpie but no I’m not that hot on this Forest is an exclusive Forest where people party like it’s 1963
900 years in the future
is here that doesn’t exist yet and that’s why it’s so hard to get in I’m going to let you guys nice dagger
are you looking at my Emerald I wasn’t but that’s nice too
yes I am luckier Jagger blisters like the very emeralds of the sun Glitters if I sent you this dagger which is been promised to give me luck for this Forest would you let me access to me
you bet your test
flattery flattery charges my battery I’ll take the dagger
we are in the forest all right into the forest that guy so exclusive
upon entering to the entering the forest Tylenol with codeine is noted of your presence he can do I smell gnome say hello
brings you all to my bailiwick I thought I’d left you after the Amber ball was defeated by the Thorns of grandeur flask
whether you’d Canyons of the Nebraska
Ford wrinkle Doodles I’d love one I could murder a drink on Google right now I’ve got unicorn punch and I’ve got unicorn Kool-Aid
what’s the difference
that’s unicorn humor
give me while I take a nap
look at him go Tylenol what do you think happens after you die
what happens after you die I am immortal
are unicorns Immortal mostly we live on forever in people’s dreams
they’ll never be a unicorn that doesn’t exist if there’s one child thinking of him or a small boy matriculating to a Catholic School
Is there any
tune to be had in this Forest as they say in their lives a man so dangerous
Admiral dark stars started a cult deep within the forest of Shadows
list of Shadows used to be the Connie Forest until a dark spell went off corrupting the branches in fairy trees themselves The Shadow Forest threatens to overtake the Tylenol with codeine unless someone can prevent the dark influence of the cult has been a bummer most major for the morning and the evening toilet with baggage your digit
you seem pretty upbeat considering that you’re a forest is about to die I haven’t seen all y’all in a while
where where is the Dark Star
some 50 hectares hence that’s like a couple hundred yards
Terry’s underestimated I have mine in brain and therefore my ability to discern distances is somewhat impaired Fusion camp for the night. What an idea I will make a magic fire using my fucking
I have a I have a good thing I can do we should Camp there for the night will end that the campaign chapter they’re absolutely
on Sunset in front of meltdown said that as of what did you guys
yeah you you guys are going to go park in front of hair do you have 30 minutes I can start telling people to tankers
three fingers cut junior high school and every fucking day there was an ass what they go through the whole school and they would say if you’re parked on Franklin or washing your car has been marked because they come by and Mark your car there’s like spots where they say you can park there for an hour but we’re watching the chalk on the move your car it was insane so it wasn’t a public school in the teachers would have to bail maybe in the middle of telling you about the meaning of Life Care Center of your car parked on Franklin your cars with Mike with DNA becomes are in a Becomes of you and I because I D A I’ll be right back and I got to go move their fucking Capri whatever
I’m having a cocktail and I’m thinking of you day drinking is 8000 things that can go wrong with your car when you go to find your car you left to go pick up to take Aaron to her car that you had left last night in Hollywood probably let you know because for safety sake and then I got a text from you and it has been stolen because that’s already been to it looks like in front of a driveway to the impound lot no
all right so that means that it’s been stolen and then the last final thought from her was
so it’s been repossessed was it really I guess so
so fun so fun to be poor so I can say it’s not like the least fun thing next to being rich
fun things in America in that order being rich being poor no fun because it actually turned out to be not as fun as when you report so then you get all bummed out because you spend your entire time being poor craving being rich and so there’s an extra depression to be coming right there’s a there’s a
Slaughterhouse-Five Billy Pilgrim I don’t know what you call it in a book Billy Pilgrim it up Billy Pilgrim is a prisoner of war and he finds himself eavesdropping on a group of Nazi soldiers discussing the imminent conquering of America they know they’re in a war with all of Europe and the Americas just joined and they’re discussing he’s is Billy Pilgrim is Kurt vonnegut’s advertised the protagonist easy listening outside of window and shoveling shit as a prisoner-of-war he’s listening to the Nazis discuss America and how are we going to get him how are we going to defeat them like what is the Nazis point of view on America at the time of this war and and it just Kurt Vonnegut fucking riffing about America has nothing to do with Nazism he doesn’t give a shit he’s using the Nazis is a is a Mork from Ork feel like looking in
Anna commenting on all of it that’s it what would a fascists think about America if you were a fascist country how would you invade America how would you take it over how would you how would they look at us and it’s a it’s a it’s a naked disgusting invigorating look at capitalism through the fascist lens turns out not that much distortion
fascism capitalism they’re compatible
they both depend on the idea that there’s a pyramid in place there’s a bunch of people with a bunch of shit at the top and there’s a bunch of way more people with a bunch of less shit at the bottom and the way you move up his by turning people in you know the way you move up his bike lying over people living out of value at the top is defined by the amount of people that don’t have as much at the bottom you use to treat you that’s it is Mary Kay cosmetics it’s it’s an way it sits at any time and Scientology it’s any any organization that has traction this room you know that there’s there’s been like likes anecdotal like things about like professors who have studied this stuff in their classrooms there was a professor who who did it is it started as a joke is that okay my name is the wave in those people who are in the way is the equivalent of the Stanford Prison Experiment but it was like it was an experiment fascism in
about the staff but I know that we all are primates we all like we all want desperately to not be excommunicated by each other and we all look to our last to look to our right and go what am I doing wrong I got that is there any way to move up and sometimes it becomes very evident by the guy on directly above you fucking up and you got like what he keeps backing up really he keeps bugging up tell me more would you like his job but yes I guess I’m a real hero
yeah you’re not too depending on the context depending on what was going down the conveyor belts at the bottom measurably more or less happy having some money with the risk of being poor I don’t it’s so hard to fucking tell there’s that debt that documentary as it’s like there’s this thing I like
it’s like forty thousand a year or something like you Peach at your like that’s how happy you are and that you liked anything beyond that you’re no more happy than anybody has depressing like not being able to pay for ramen noodles is depressing being behind on your gas bills and having the government yell at you getting red envelopes in your mailbox and having people knock on your door and go
all of that affects your emotional level, said money isn’t everything but it eases the nerves but there’s a certain point where those Knox stop in the Red Envelope stop in the ramen noodles are easy to buy any by where the fuck you want that’s numbers are wrong forty Grand a year or something like that it always changes cuz what the fuk is his numbers mean what does 40 grandman don’t know what that means but there’s a level where it fit tops off and after that you ain’t ever going to be any happier than you are at the level the serotonin level the amount of good mood that you have it it topped off fast if you know where your next meal’s coming from and you’re a review of you stink like your girlfriend likes you and yet it get like there’s a couple of minimal like requirements you need to be really happy and then at you could be making 8 million dollars a week on top of
and all you’re going to do is go punching your girlfriend going
why do you make it so hard as you do I am considering I think you’re right though I think it is at the moment when you’re really striving and like I think about I was so desperately poor that you know when you when you have this moment we go do I buy a pack of cigarettes or do I buy food today or what was that Susan Helia, going to San Francisco have a great line when she got the first thought you have when you wake up in the morning is what in my room can I sell and then. At that goes away but then I always think there’s another kind of it like a built-in on happiness what what what struck me when you were talking about that was more than
still bleeding comfortable or having enough money to live is the psychopathy of people who have billions of dollars who won’t desist like what keeps you going at the Warren Buffett level what keeps you going at the men’s County Jail you know what I mean
electronic I got a billion I bought a house last year with all of my anguish all of my sweat and all my sadness there’s a number value on the house that I bought and it’s bigger than any house that in Milwaukee I was like oh I’m one of these people I’m a douche
details magazine is doing a photoshoot called TV Mavericks
so they invite me to a photo shoot it’s some of the some of the people that I love people that certainly would make TV shows that I love I’m a TV Maverick so I’m going to be like they have four curity location going to shoot them it’s good wood to make it look glamorous cuz they’re Mavericks and I show up to this house eventually asked the caretakers of the house what is this house worth 82 and 1/2 million dollars I was walking around that house and I was starting to go on the ceiling
in my living room
I didn’t win at no point was I having happiness I wasn’t I wasn’t thinking I was just lost from the Amazon
Smosh progress the same amount of beer makes you drunk in the same amount of you know when I’m King of the county when I had enough money to buy myself dinner and somebody else ya enough for a burrito or enough to buy myself a beer and tip the bartender that I thought was any other amount of money and that’s that’s that’s a good perspective to have that I think the happiest moment of my life is like 25 years ago when my wife and I weren’t married and I got in a cab with her after your gig and I remember thinking she was the you know the woman I wanted to be with and everything and that to me is the happiest moment of my life not getting a big check or being until a or any of that fucking make your parents happy I remember I remember their parents or my parents
brighten early I don’t spend it all in one place
I want to tell me a better story I want to tell him about you went with me and try to read a story and a straight-up hobo and we were heading home with suspenders on it for it to Spanish I had a bend on a stick and we go over to my place and we can rent a movie with back then you rented movies from a geographic location that’s how was your movie in a weird Matrix grid I want to watch Young Frankenstein pulling it for myself player and what I’m talking about it was a weird error
Avenue in La Robin I just moved out from Milwaukee six months ago we woke up one morning Jeff was gone there was a note on the coffee table that said I’m boy Rob Dan
tonight I did something
then I will never forgive myself for
you guys left change on the table from Del Taco and I took it
I took it because I’m broke I love you guys I’m ashamed of myself and I promise you I will give you this money back it was beautifully written by Herman Melville a crash between Jeff and I I was into you for two grand at one point and then you were into me and then back and forth like we would like goddamn by Nickel Arcade stand-up Filippi’s in fact he didn’t have two quarters to Shake together a year later but he did have Pac-Man I’ve been a puppet of paloma apartment
Island eyes and down over there
the day before I got the call that I was going to be on Whose Line Is It Anyway I was evicted by the sheriff for my apartment and I had to put everything I had into trash bag and I and I’d lied to a new landlord that I would have $1,000 in 10 days I didn’t have any money at all I’d no prospects and I just completely lying I was I was I was thrown out I left a bunch of shit at this place I really should go pay her back I guess she was kind of an asshole
I went to this new place and that the landlord was your friend Matt before I’m back in ten days just give me $1,000 first and last and can you go check out if you want to stay at my place until I get ready to go to your back house that little kitty back has nekopara cuz it was really cool but it’s not a tiny time in the sky is nice house and I got two trash bags and all I had was the 45 or 45 cents I found in my couch and I knew that I could eat a burrito that night I was so happy about that and I put my bags and I’m literally the phone rang and I managed to trace he’s been with me through thick and thin cigars are you sitting down or no
no furniture and a half years I fought against you from the beginning of the process I don’t I don’t want to harsh this story at all but I
and that she got you got you got the thing and I go when will they pay me to see work on Tuesday that you’ll have the money in nine days the day before the guy got back okay cool and I hung up the phone and I hit the ground like a sack of dislike
lordy lordy like not like I just was out of energy I was like that was it I was the end of my tether and if I can pay this mother fucker in 10 days I will be alive in 10 days. Everything was fine but it’s a beautiful thing I’m getting right to the end of that rope as I I don’t want to go work at Starbucks I’ll blow my brains out I can’t do it
have another option from Dan Harmon until it says no other no other recourse first of all no
I think we’re in the 15-minute window for you guys to light it up. Let’s just close
I’m going to think of something there’s no rush baby you’re rich and I’m happy you’re going to die all right who in the audience is the least happy Adam Goldberg
call Adam Adam why are you unhappy
podcast is at home I hit myself in the face with a microphone while being interviewed about why I’m unhappy for my job because my supervisor left at 7 last weekend I worked overnight and I walk in today and she’s holding the transcription pedal I brought them home and a paycheck was $90 deducted out of it and email you but I didn’t get around to it so I don’t have a great night
Adam Adam Adam come up on stage
Adam Goldberg Adam Goldberg
he’s become something of a mascot for Hermantown mascot called
Adams Valhalla
Adam this is a world where everything that you say goes okay the rest of us like like you you have a microphone
you stand there and you’re like a god in this world and the rest of us will obey your win
the Gators 2012 it is September 2012
an attractive woman comes up to me and says all your spine looks normal and not weird is that a hunch or are you just being a sex monster
I have a hunch that I am a sex monster I’d like a yield to you almost immediately my name is Yolanda I have a size 18 waist get going
let’s make it size 20 now
I just expanded
trying I’m trying I’m trying to be the straight man fully Tendencies and my buddy Dan Harmon use these comb his hair for the very first time just on my account
I’m I’m with the Adam on that one then
what I did by the way I didn’t whatever you’re trying to give you a slight personal grooming and harmontown
I can only get through to you through podcast look like eating a lot of washed your car hunting the rag a person with the I doubt you you can’t use that rag again it’s too. I just want like like a car rag that you can reuse I’m down I’m just curious and let you use it and then you’re like oh I’ll wring it out and it’s like it’s all gray and I don’t want to put that on my car again
dust always go
I do not have his for there is a difference
my voice is cracking on you guys fix it coming
Adam Goldberg
dreaming big thank you so much
Prince Rodger Nelson master
tell Katie Lavigne audio recordings Equity vertec Emily Gordon producer Daniel Kramer program director Justin Marshall podcast I’ve been Jeff Davis are kind of tell that one more time for your mayor Dan Harmon
thank you so much I hope all of your car is have not been towed
and when you get in your car I urge you to reach down between your legs
Annie’s the seed bag
thank you