Episode
Episode 340: It’s Not Called Show-Friends
Description
Schrab is comptrolling to prepare for his upcoming role as moderator of the Comic-Con Rick & Morty Panel. But Jeff’s still here, and without a podium, not-quite fitting into the seats on the stage. Listen now and gain the inside track on such topics as Jaws 4, Bees, and people who shower excessively: probably…
Transcript
hey hey everybody
Welcome to the beautiful Dynasty typewriter
harmontown is now in session Spencer Creek
I’m not driving truck driving tonight
text Mom
let’s give it up for the mayor of harmontown Dan Harmon
thank you
thank you to my friends for showing up and supporting me
thank you thank you to the Yanni is board coming in and standing in line at the right time damn seems like back in the day you used to not come here the regular way you used to come in a different way and now it just seems like every time you come this other way what happened to us
damn
I want to bring that back till the break of dawn making love to you damn
okay alright
what was what was the name of that song I don’t know we’ve been lazy lazy lazy lazy musically lazy opener yeah but also kind of in a positive way like like rolling out into the ocean like not a beached whale the original whale to become a whale after like I like I don’t want to be a giant hippo this is where there’s no market for this I took a wrong turn at the Albuquerque of darwinian progress like I somehow I’m basically like a big blubbery pig on a beach
if these giant ham hocks for flippers I could be the most powerful fucker in the ocean I’m doing it I’m going back to that don’t that’s that those are pre pre pre pre aquatic whales that the dialog of Base
Gary’s Auto Sales to the water will that I am I also went back to the water hey guys
what was I
am I not supposed to interpret that as you
Rob is practicing hosting because he’s going to Modern at Red Lobster
table for five follow that guy
what are the work to be done by that guy on the customer follow that guy
a bit easy
what is the deal with when you go to a restaurant that has a host and in also later people like is the host is that a person is it like the military person
is it like the military wear officer’s school is different from enlisted men like like like it’s like I was surprised to find out that never the twain shall meet the fast track they get promoted the middle manager or whatever is never scrub the disc possibly some of them have some of them haven’t but at any rate that’s not really there like I’d like to host well I have believed that host is usually where you start and then you work up to later cuz then you get tips
do the host is is is more like a shadow program yeah I think Wonder mutt at the Hall of Justice that sound you made that make well because you’re you’re you’re you’re picturing a laborer and now I’m comparing them to an animal an animal
first name is wonder I was more I was more thinking in terms of the strata like you know where you start your kind of training cuz you’re kind of like hanging back and I was but when you’re the customer you’re receiving the host is like some kind of the Damned power over things I don’t know where at least I did they have a power over like Hospitality like they’re welcoming you and it feels like at their place but now they can’t even wait
very conscious of my body today I was inventorying my mood it’s a new word inventorying and I was like I’m like I think maybe consciousness of your body should be like a mood that’s like like sometimes you just feel you’re just like there’s nothing you’re going to be able to do sometimes you feel a little handsome
that’s not know I did a little bit bit there at the end I risked so I was like go 90�� now or what are you doing you’re telling them you feel fat like they know what like what it what is your show and who are you why are you talking to a microphone who are they what are they supposed to think about Dan Harmon harmontown Comic-Con panel and
so he wants to practice Yeah I want to practice and I don’t want it to turn into harmontown because no one wins that way but you want to Pratt well yeah
you picked a great place to practice I’m going to make it worth my drive here is pissing you off so if I’m controlling I’m kind of you know I have a job to do yeah you said hi to me tonight so you know bonus win win I’ve got so much win
it is different maybe I just think maybe I’m an elitist and I think of hosts differently then guests and Busboys like I am like connected work I’m thinking the same thing could have been against as I am in my stagecraft post report you’ve done how many Comic-Con panels let’s be serious what what How old how many prolly there’s been like this for what are some do’s and don’ts give me start with the dues
go number one I think the big crowd Dynamics in general but you’ve you and I wrote at award shows together
won an Emmy kid but you know and so you’re familiar with the kind I don’t have to I don’t have to advise you on this but it’s like Hall h is like 3,000 people like 6,000 how many does Hall h hold many many feral be a problem my voice kind of carries a hundred and fifty people like they could get a laugh off of clearing your throat at the right time or taking the right pause and there’s an interface and then the larger the crowd get it’s not that they’re Dumber it’s just that they’re kind of wearing gloves on their feelings so like you’re it it just people make the mistake of thinking that that means that you have to dumb everything down it’s very close to that but I do think the 3,000 people aren’t smarter than a hundred fifty people to put in a different way
like like a kind of like more of a on off like Frankenstein switch that a light switch in terms of like you want to like be big and crispy with your hey who here wants to react to the word sandwich in a bigger simpler but more powerful machine is there anybody here going to Comic-Con this year anybody
two people people right here in this room that’s riveting
maybe they’ve seen you enough to everybody if somebody not doing that right
know that we we we we didn’t really come out do you guys remember Ryan Ridley Ridley I think we’ve already talked about it on the Shelf with red Ryan does a great job of explaining what I do I do I do it online and was way funnier than you told Ryan for those of you who is the writer on Rick and Morty came out he moderated and he dressed up like a king of whatever you do is go to the king look like a king from a pack of cards almost right now I’m going to I’m going to get like my way already spent some time on this costume and then he comes out and he like and it’s a huge room so the silence is deafening so he comes out and he’s like
and I’m smiling people to be laughing already and it’s he’s just there because my joke was it is a brilliant joke joke was that Game of Thrones battle was after ours and he was just there to you know kill the time like like the audience was waiting for it to get here so he could be at the Game of Thrones yeah it didn’t go over well because again he looked like a deck of cards and he never set up the bit for it to land after it kind of like hit the skids with my memory is that he also never had any fights on by the way my name is trying to work on the show a moderator right now but if you like me you just don’t know because a lot of the panel will be moderated by like some guy from BuzzFeed or something and
people are used to in those Hogs with like we do we do this person may be good at this job bad at this job inevitably who cares it because like what is being good or bad at that job for him when the people are like I just think the people are there till like like I don’t want to use the word worship because we tend to punish like you know like we I don’t know we have it like a negative view of like fandom in general kind of still but but like, is a Mecca they have journeyed there is the Kool-Aid is real and it’s the Kool-Aid doesn’t kill you it’s just good to drink it and take as a cool ain’t it great and people are in this room like at least we can all fucking Express Express that when we love the Simpsons for the next 45 minutes without loving it wrong or like someone like letting us know that it was ugly The Way We Like The Simpsons of things related to
really powerful about that live probably the same thing going on at the Grateful Dead concert burning man whatever why am I explaining audiences
why don’t we practice bringing people out because there’s going to be a big that’s moderators like they’re like they’re and they’re like it’s like but according to you there’s no way I can screw this up well what about like
just go on and be myself oh yeah the love that you bring someone out from his tour of America is Jeff Bryan Davis from Whose Line Is It Anyway
welcome back
this is Jeff Davis’s first win
he’s been on many different episodes of this podcast Jeff Davis Jeff Davis
Jeff Davis is now no damn they just made out
I’m not kissing you well if you’re going to do it that way
that’s like the fifth time I’ve made out with a man for comedy in 20 years and like but it’s all putting out that I’m like
is there the whole time I was going to go is there such a thing as they’re gay face now is there a like a like a good interviewing questions thank you you are fucking ready to go you know I’ve been rehearsing in your lips I love kissing I felt we cross the threshold into kind of late
like a real a real yeah we like a good same page Clouseau if you if you spend $5 you can see this for the subscription
we never said anything during all of pride month by the way we miss Pride months like I don’t know
I want to remind people to remember I guess David Cummings he is like pride month continues to be really like strongly celebrated in horror Fiction podcast like I’ll just say the no-sleep podcast like they just do it fucking great job of like rolling out the lgbtq carpet while it was out and it’s like it’s it feels you feel like you’ve done something for anyone by listening that you feel I feel like you’re cheating cuz you’re like but it’s better these stories about stories from gay couple perspectives that are about like not like that that are about like a hooks coming through a window or like it’s like it’s more compelling it’s like you’re it’s it’s better horror
where did the hook come from I don’t know what do you want to pretend at the panel and get real Hands-On practice there like Spencer why don’t you pitch me as a panelist like like some of that Rob has to interview on the panel this is the guy who plays Morty
okay so Justin yeah okay so what’s the nastiest
chica sexy is like
Nike thing that ever happened behind the scene at Rick and Morty we were in the room and and Dan came into the other day with me and we just started really really getting on each other’s balls on each other’s balls that’s how we broke season 4
how is that why the show take so long to make yeah that’s another thing you want to hit a lot what’s the show coming out so long as it’s so hard where are you at right now
Heavenly episodes I don’t like 70 anything how are you where are you three are you going to do what the fuck house with a giant pools all my paperwork
we’re going to be good do you know they got a B, Justin Roiland
I noticed here’s something or if that’s okay I’m breaking this is me just I was looking at other cues and panels and I noticed you were doing your homework you really is anything in
Rob gave it to a high five
I cut my finger I didn’t want to give me your age don’t audition when they ask questions usually like when I’ve done panels together tonight and then they do like this very day been rehearsing this bet and then it comes out very like the whole audience goes wild or whatever but your your your fans at Rick and morning fans there like why did dr. this or what’s in this bottle or are those trash cans from the the the Smith house or did he steal those are or what you know like they have very specific question which
kind of cool right I mean that’s not really a question
but it is and I don’t know if you’ve noticed that I think there’s a well I guess I haven’t is my answer cuz I’m really done panels for community and Rick and Morty and I I don’t know there’s not a lot of like there’s like a self-policing kind of enzyme in the are people that might otherwise like that they want to they want to they want to contribute to like this very short run time you know they don’t want to be the one that asked the question that causes other people a problem of some kind every once in a while there’s people that take a shot at the Moon with some kind of
larger than just a regular question bit but like 80% of those actually work there dude like I am I coming back next season when Papa and gets super poopy butthole and I think Dan is right you’re going to show up for that feeling better about my body
but just do Head and Shoulders with the camera
mirrors all over the green room and just kind of like in it it’s what it’s just one of those like that’s why I think it’s a good biorhythmic thing like my body doesn’t look any different to but I just like my t-shirts like a tarp like late over this bowling pin lyric and I like how I look in the mirror and I got like a fix that posture that and then I’ll go like this and it gets really depressing cuz it’s like a fucking monster was good posture like your belly didn’t change shape at all it’s just like moved on the y-axis wide is no certainly you may be yes but not to his fault but I’m sure it’s like I’m sliding and
I may be noticing or whatever yeah
he’s up I’m controlling
I did want to say you didn’t answer the question I’m going to get to the truth who’s on the panel you are just I don’t know I don’t know
navigate voice Talent like it might not like Ryan Ridley and they assume that it’s going to be Chris and Sarah and Spencer right I would probably
not me but I would hate to be wrong about that all right well if you could ask one question right what would it be
Dan are you coming into work tomorrow
good I like it when you’re there we got a lot done today we got a lot done today to almost two episodes almost two stories broken and yeah I think I am I wouldn’t call it working hello he has his moments until they get the fuck out
I don’t really know really we’re communicating in this language in the writers room where it’s like an old married couple on it’s like I I don’t I I assume it’s bad for the other people
okay why would that cuz it was late like there’s a showrunner and kind of guy like this deputize like his job is to keep the trains running on time but it’s like
but you can’t fire me and then he’s like and then I’m just doing this bit with schrauben but I’ll tell her I’ll be like okay well what if what if the space suit and a thing
don’t fucking questioning if you have something to contribute fucking pitch something otherwise shut the fuk up I’m just trying to help man
if you want to help pitch something I think your picture was a question was like like why why isn’t Rick Morty
invisible on it’s just how much do the job pay I’ll let you know at the end of the month and I do have to wonder like it’s going to be really pissed when I was younger writers that are like black man in the morning and they’re like oh wait so what what is this is husband at work
they’ve been coming around they realize that’s how we work and we do we we did a good job today yeah but it will I wonder if my mind goes back to the note we would get in Milwaukee in the in from The Improv community
how many sports are did well in both which goes to show you that we had the problem because one was like
when they were very different from each other but they both Food Express to us basically like it in the politest way is like it would be nice when you guys are doing something if you would let people know what it is and how they can help and not just make you like black I knew each other and make fun of everything around you make a Heavenly Creatures true British girls Glade fantasizing about homicide in the 50s kind of like five you give up playing like right it’s like all of a sudden just talking a die-hard references and there’s like a referee I don’t what is recreated die-hard theater game
I’ve never went when I first met you was 94 Sports tournament and I had been in LA, Sports for like 6 months so I can press pretty new and I’d heard about the New York ComedySportz guys like Tomlin and my crock have like all the other guys and then you guys that the dead are waves and I was so intimidated to meet you and we all like Mets and wanted to hang out with each other but we never really talked we just kind of stared at our feet and have a drink but then I saw you guys do the dead alewives show and I think I’m fucking blew my mind it was really you can be funny and weird and not give a fuck about the audience cuz you guys truly didn’t know about the quality was going on in the right way which is like like we’re going to do what we want
we didn’t know we didn’t have any option of pleasing the audience likely we would know how so but you are signing like Scott books and that’s why I think that’s when I first met you you were sitting at the table when you were signing Skyler I didn’t know what that was and I just want people don’t all right it’s time for one of your jobs as a host of the deal with segments bring music you have to sing if you want to if you want to add a musical sting to it update us on my backyard be problem
I think exactly four wings Flags
how’s it going I got the full credit and deserve a break or figure out like to how to do the Austin Powers as a B-movie we came up with a BB gun when we round Island in Collinsville
do I make you horny baby
how do you make us even more about I just got back from someone so and boy am I I was tired I was in there cuz they were there acting what the first submarine was like we’re going to have to we have to do we have to get our best Sailors Reagan and we’re going to put them in I mean their job is to keep the boat up until it sinks every doing that like you’re going to love it
answering Corporal the Navy has trained these men their entire life until you go again to everywhere, we got to keep it a secret or it’s not going to work on a plane in the Aging we can’t take a Jeep to deal with killer ants in the Yucatan to make me fly and then the lake okay have a glass of milk mr. T you love it
who is the first I mean I know it was like there was the first people that tried to make a submersible thing they were crazy people they had the first time you’ve built a submarine that you put a bunch of suckers on that thing that’s crazy man boat is made the sink I’m not coming near it guys don’t worry we packed a 30% of this boat is packed with baking soda my name is Ensign Davis I noticed there’s no sales on this boat things in these type but I know there is a story about the Civil War there was a I think they were Confederates you can believe that was a little little Dickens
what are they doing I’m thinking about science people however we might be able to breathe underwater
well wait a minute to pick a lane all we’re saying to you was one day we’ll live in a fucking hive-mind we’re going to fight that a little bit about how much you have to love slavery to think that you can breathe underwater
it’s like being a flat earther show program that works cuz you want to take pictures of the kitchen
I know you’re flattering me like holyshit you made your own space again fuck you I’m not a dummy it’s just an accent
there’s a lot of smart southern people fucking noodles of them just the way you talk I can’t figure out what was the first submersible probably first right which is just on a big Crane and so it’s not like it’s not a self-contained it doesn’t cruise around but you lower it to water and they would go up to like a sailing vessel and like to hire check equivalent of six dudes put in a bathtub over their heads and carrying a spear with a bomb on the under bed so they could walk up two ships and like that’s hyperbole is anybody in the audience like relatively Civil War story about game
do themselves up but they also did accomplished like a lot I think there’s a it’s a very Twisted strange story cuz there was also their friends X2 it like no one knows what happened down there what happened at the mission and then exploded I think is what it was that no one knows what went wrong was there a lot of Naval battles during the Civil War
what was the weather what was the ironclads and there were also submersibles it would go and try to torpedo the because you talk about supply lines chiefly you’re not you’re at like competing for Domination over the seas except in the description of all warm water on the water slide at Waterloo I’d like I was pictured Waterloo Waterloo
hey I’d rather you know enough about the Conquering the Seas I want to hear about conquering the bees Musical part of that segment
Six Flags
why were waiting for wings for wings and sacks on the knees Cherry in that cargo you’re the you’re the motherfuker please listen to my pleas they don’t know nothing I’m a flea I ain’t to be but probably make me sneeze yo King kingdom Animalia
phylum insect insect and sexy
order to file on King Philip eats pussy with the needs I think order right order order class glass pipe Hyman hymenoptera hymenoptera okay Texana Miraak
Miami High monologist call the Proctologist what’s the new deal with bees in the backyard we’re getting rid of them just quickly I looked it up the HL Hunley was a seven-person submarine Isabel we don’t need bees that’s a common misconception, what do you call a colony collapse disorder is a natural thing that should be allowed to continue until all because they’re gone and I won’t hear anything else on the subject but it was a seven man submarine that yeah they had a bomb spear they they sink a ship and then they’ve got lost before they returned and then they basically recommissioned it
then they did it again at the same thing happened in the crew all day anyway this this beam and the good be man okay so last time we talked about the bees there is this this, Colby man who came and he was hammering on a wall and he wasn’t getting too far it was great old boy had a great time use collected leaves okay there’s a retaining wall that hold back some dirt and behind that wall are just a bunch of bees cuz there’s like a hole in the wall is adjacent to another wall in that wall not the retaining wall has a hole in it and stir the bees crawl in that hole and they have a high are the worst new holyshit have you ever been stung by a bee I don’t know I’m never I’ve never had I’ve stepped on a bee and I got stung by stepping on it
like stinging Abby by killing it
oh shit
he was the true be all along colony of honey bees living in my wall honey bees but I’ve never had a whole colony of your house minding their business I mean come on let’s not great it’s great I don’t want to spend it on your jokes
I don’t know I mean I don’t want to share your jokes but I will if I have to do this or not, so now I’m just losses are fucking Chris my new friend out because it inhibits you they call it old coffin bones that’s what the down in the galley I didn’t know you were still here I know I know you’re I know you’re sure your comptroller slang that you try to use to say say stuff
left turn Clyde of honey bees living in my back walls are honey bees like that Every Which Way but Loose reference I just like dropping on you
he’s a nice guy knows two people in the audience kinds of bees are there like most of them are honey bees right otherwise they’re like wasps or some shit there’s a bumblebee Yellow Jackets wasps or yellow jackets right what is yellow jackets in the limbs in the super kind extended but I don’t know a real yellow jackets and hornets gemologist in the audience not even like in Tamala gist
you don’t know that but then you don’t support slavery what the fuck
we’re going to find out what you’re good at tonight
what do you think it shows you what do you think is a common denominator of these people that are like they’re all morticians who plays recreational highlight
two people two people so there’s a bunch of honey bees living in the back wall you didn’t tell me there was a wall I was like what time around so it’s the week before that guy can we have the guy from this company came he look like he look like he was 16 and like I know I must be getting old because I’m like you’re an adult you can have a job and he’s like you and you’re like you can be offended by being called the Young yeah when you’re young people who like that yeah what’s what’s the what’s the What’s the 411 on the you guys have a yard
so they can make my doorbell connect to adjust a gun that shoots me in the face
an end and they’re there I don’t have that I can’t look them in the eyes to tell them they’re working on a house that no one lives in anymore and because I feel like this is their Purgatory they deserve the work on this house until they died and so I don’t talk to them but I guess they’re stringing wire back there and they needed to go through a wall and one of the walls with bees in it so they the only one mediately quit ran away and said enjoy your doorbell and like they’re waiting for us to deal with bees so they can is it comes run the wires are the gold house never doing anything like this again in any house I ever live in here just going to get 12 boom Box near the wall I don’t have to I don’t even want to be there anymore be there isn’t one to be there thank you
you just want to remind your own business if I’m not the first person to do this because I’m just probably act so okay it’s not called Showbiz it’s called Shofu
chauffeur it’s not called Showbiz it’s called show is a fucked it up is that called show Friends friendship for Comic-Con
it’s not called show it’s called Showbiz not show fun for so looking for you it is funded by two
yeah when is Comic-Con how many days a week, its next week is it next week I think next Thursday or Friday what you going to wear as a as the panel
protective sleeves rolled up and walk me back to the Show Business joke okay you know it’s it’s it’s called Show Business nacho fun fun it’s not called Showbiz it’s called show the saving how I understand that yeah I never heard so far because it’s a constant problem in Hollywood people having too much fun and it getting in the way of business know it’s people having friendships that’s the thing that gets in the way OK Google write everything don’t open with this
ice cream. Show yeah I screwed it up on a different area entirely like where you going you know two two two lefts don’t make a r to two wrongs don’t make a right they make a wrong wrong formula do it over there safer interesting weekend if you are if we’re going to do the big thing yeah I don’t think we are
apparently in the backyard of Dan’s house they don’t call it
always going to do on FaceTime
they call it show business show.
Dr Beaman Beeville Dr Bayville
herb share $100 million dollars
$1,000 of the amount $100 is finger in different places on your face
why did your face what what where would you put $0.75 like what’s the worth of Pinky equivalent of 75
75
show me a freaking bird is it still possible to find a YouTube god dammit by a plus those with Josh for his brother who knows what peace of anatomy is heavily featured
how’s the beginning it was the best thing that’s ever happened we all we were having lunch at home restaurant on Hillhurst and it was damn Rob, tonight right maybe maybe Robert Ross are we all set let’s make with no one had ever seen Jaws for we knew that I think that we knew that Mario Van Peebles was in it Michael Caine was in it and that’s all we knew and then we all said meet back at Rob’s place at 3 and everybody make Jaws for and whoever get the closest twins to what we think happened and we were going to watch it we’re going to watch it and we got to Ross and I never knocking on the door cuz I knew it was different I used to live in so you can just you can just feel the weed going on
and
his Jaws for Dan came closest animated like really impressive thing it’s super funny you kind of got close to what the actual story structure was robbed put a piece of duct tape on a penis and made a shark fin with the numeral 4 on it
can you put like a little white ball on the head of his dick and make a shark called Jaws for and he fucked a lemon or orange or lemon raspberry lemonade in the end and what was Michael Caine and what was Catherine Deneuve for no reason and
left at Sea based on it and then the Michael Caine was just like square glasses it’s like this construction paper ocean that’s what West Anderson he like before I can hear you laughing so I can just kind of shut up
the shark comes in and it’s his dick and he’s got a duct tape 10 on it is and his pants are around his thighs and insurance I kind of pulled up like a fucking gross pornstar was like people up in your shirt the bare minimum pay is like going to his own construction paper ocean has like a Leti of Manchild like like like look I made a whole ocean so I can make my dick hard on you halfway succeeded in a heap a like I’m kind of glad I didn’t cuz it would have been really like why are you supposed to eat
how do you spell for you have like your energy Under Pressure you guys are outside in the hall if you have a high ball shaped like I was losing the light was last look yeah I just know you can’t stop me when you get to your house that you were kind of like 40% there and write and then but then let the final isn’t a spoiler if I tell you what happens at the end of OK Google stuff like is now mostly flaccid shark jaws for a penis into a hole into the the orange
and it’s hit him sucking my cock in the mouth
animal Den in the shark withdraws from the artificially gouged stunt stunt mouth-to-mouth carved in it that would be the size of penis withdraws from that whole trip memorably 7-27-20 Pires illusion the TV cameras of the time a slight string of either Citrus or what have you like briefly connect a subject or object and it’s got cartoonize boot on it for its final shot of the segment as voice by trav’s looked at Catherine Deneuve and says mind your own business woman
Ben greatest work you’ve ever done
spell adventuresome program she chose Rob to direct the Sarasota program off of Child Support
I forgot that yeah awesome Kota yeah that’s great
she put it in her butt
yeah nobody was on the internet yet it was going to thought it was a hole where you like through the Paris of the videos on the internet while you are working on Lego 2 which is just crazy to think that they put it on their front page cuz we got four yeah yeah I think somebody went oh cuz it was 101 for some reason for a really long time and then they end then the Comedy Central probably didn’t watch it this is a sample of what
not safe for work then I love that people call the truck jobs are people call Bruce Willis Die Hard waking up in the morning and there’s a roaster crewing and that’s when you first see Rob’s dick is the shark and it goes over to a half-eaten bowl of cereal with only milk and a cup of Fruit Loops in it and in and robs dick has what the hell Michael Caine ate all my cereal
I’m going to get my revenge on him cuz the movie was called Jasper in the ranch
who’s the protagonist in the jars for is that Michael Caine or Catherine questions viability is the sign of art he changed from not having a dick in his mouth you’re having a dick in his mouth yeah Mike, this is problematic in this we cannot get off of IMDb of some of that he’s done that was Channel 1011 and was just fun and now it’s like it’s the kind of shit that can ruin you and he cannot
you cannot expunge that from history
what was the one when you suck the baby in the car
weather in Bauer yeah I definitely affect the baby in the Channel 101 video
and then they were like hey look at this
and I was like why are you making everyone look at that
cuz that’s what I’m doing now that Liana check it out I didn’t say Siri anyting to turn your wallet off
anyways yeah fun on the internet said got fired Dan got Roseanne fired they had to take action as if I can a liar in this room anyways I know I was thinking it was floating in my pool today how grateful I am that right right before I became like to ridiculously privilege to like be charismatic that the that I got like that send off so it was like no one’s ever going to like you you fucking dork and good cuz I was just getting to that point where I would have to either give to charity or feel like a monster
and I’m just floating my pool going I don’t have to do anything everyone picked on me the whole time it’s a net the net result I can I can leave that paper trail in my own head do you give the charity you’re not listening to me
I know you don’t have to do anything ever I people are mean they’re mean if your nice they’re made of your honest they’re mean if your people are gross and me you don’t have to love them or dress them you don’t have to get up in the morning and set your watch by what they give a fuck about like they’re not real they’re bad people so if you accidentally tripped over a rock and has a million dollars under it you can actually sleep like a baby that night if you don’t spend it on cheeseburgers that fall from drones over the poorest neighborhood I think if you had the audience can take one thing away tonight it’s whatever the fuck then just said right now
truer words
rob you should try pandering to Rick and Morty fan I mean truly of pandering to Rick and Morty fans when do we just go like oh man that’s more helpful than Mr meeseeks like the fucking lose their gun that shoot portals and people be like why why did Rob get the job and not Spencer this guy fucking seems rented a row why why would anyone not want me to do that
you’re on Deck man look I didn’t I wasn’t part of this meeting I was napping serious
,
I don’t know I don’t care it was pissed to me and I was like that’s fine
who did it will rise I said I said there’s no such thing as a bad idea
I thought you whether you wanted me to be there with you
who did who did it before you rob who did last year oh boy I didn’t I didn’t I didn’t recognize him on a really popular show that I don’t did they do a yes I thought you know my friend wants me there to be with him I’m going to I’m going to try to do my best to support him
let’s bring up Steve Levy yeah
music music it was the
thank you for that intro you’re going to crush a Comic-Con you’re going to crush a Comic-Con God what if I what if I do this could be your big break this could be in this could be a real fucking game-changer unfortunately it wasn’t my pitch the network came to me and said hey we’ve seen Rob schrab Madre things where we really like that guy you think you’d be interested and I said okay well you got to let me check upstairs that’s good that’s good
so you’re just tolerating my presence always is so totally approve it was an awkward and the previous moderator was the Impractical one of the Impractical Jokers what are you doing my queen I want to be doing some studying and yeah yeah yeah yeah Austin Texas and everything you wanted
Mojo Nixon if you call Mojo Nixon okay
don’t look at me I don’t know he’s practicing hosting a Punk Rock Girl Dead Milkmen
listen when you start to do some fixing I like that song Stewart
might have to do that kids Stewart you know that it goes like that that was the precursor to Rick from Rick and Morty I think
where is there aliens
can I give that guy with the mustache was like Hey like you made the test go up to three Radcliffe’s whenever the Brooklyn Nets DC thing or it’s like oh yeah what are we call it we call it like what’s it’s just the name of some dude right like what is it like when you’re the clicks that you get Geiger Geiger like I’m sure there’s like a geiger is probably a capitalist and like they have their own Geiger because nuclear energy It Go modern thing is post like this stance so they’re not going to get there I got to measure it and whatever the fuck we do where they put the fucking who founded
is that like that idea that you’re most vulnerable to radiation in your reproductive organs I did make sense scientifically who is your favorite color favorite gravelly voice character which one is the guise of the one of the three the yeah the I like the guy who shot dogs good and he’s like don’t shoot the dogs badly or I’ll shoot you badly
did you wonder why they needed us to shoot the dogs well like to be part of all that I guess it was just that I’m not and I’m not digging it I’m just like did you think for any part of that where you kind of like I get it cuz it’s sort of like they want to they want to they want to give you a full pic portrait of a of a crisis that happened because people Reserve political and literal power for their control and then when that melts down if those people aren’t responsible it trickles down to a fucking dog I didn’t watch the series I listen to my roommate watch it I heard it was going out on a limb here by recommending you want to hear no evil very good news is very well done it because all of you were watching it
I liked it quite a bit
did you like the part where they shot all the dogs know I fast forward or that’s for it okay so Levy yeah are you still a good guy that hope so okay when the waldrons a bachelor party when I give it to you but I don’t know how Lantus we’re in Atlantis what the biggest yeah yeah the one where you at the commercials and you go down the slide to the shark tanks
yeah yeah so you Harrison 2020 guys there to celebrate Waldron you want your water park yeah yeah yeah like a great way to get all of the hepatitis there was a lazy river those are so fun but we should be fun they had like little Rapids so it felt like you know a little more adventurous it was a lazy I mean make up your mind a little Rapids but you’re lazy and mean come on
we were we were at the adults hotel and then there are the kids yeah jealousy of the people on The Lazy River at the hotels that both those actual River thing where they wasn’t a lazy river because actually ironically I think they would play at a lot of my social anxiety because it’s not lazy in terms of like if you could want in a figure eight around a hotel like eat you like a Mite I’m on the Lazy River by Ike where is Kyle you know I was on the lazy river
back splash Sonic’s slow down for Kyle and he’s going to be like to to The Lazy River don’t be clingy and then like I actually had this exact Kyle’s and then you’re like this is no lazy so I actually was like am I going to are they going to get too far ahead of me I had I paddled for some reason in my mind that would be way more doable if you are on our actual River because then it’s like you’d be like oh man I’m way behind or I’m way ahead and there is no like kind of your like hell that’s lazy all year long I mean like if like there was a CSI Miami where is he a shark from the Shark Tank at 1 Resort Casino somehow ended up in the lazy river of another casino hotel
that was that was the cold open call in the shark attack in the lazy river is like one of the Sharks was transplanted into what it from one casinos tank to another take it as like a lazy ass looks like I was like what if this if this is every episode of this fucking show but wait what
never mind try a different show why was why did the Brady Bunch go to Hawaii it’s fucking for wear two pairs of pants if they got a hole in one
what damn he was ready for that well how is yall’s Fourth of July about that quick we didn’t talk to either of those two through Kate and eyes emergency kits
where did I do where is you keep your emergency kit tectonics
you’re going to run out of your fucking bags of water in like 20 minutes but isn’t all that water like just unhealthy because it’s been sitting there in 5 gallon plastic jugs forever and died of cancer instead of in the apocalypse now but I’ll have like a tumor the size of an eggplant of my shoulder from drinking like NU Car
tell you goodnight. You’re going to rock it as a fucking,, thank you so much you are fucking killing it thank you
they say there’s two kinds of earthquakes there’s like the rumbling rolling thing or you’re like sitting there swinging which is the only kind I’ve ever experienced cuz I got here just after the Northridge quake and the but the Northridge Quake is the other kind and like you’re like some people fly out of there been around for that what it was that was that like for you man yeah right tell me tell us of the Northridge quake
daytime I was just there was one where I was in the shower and nearly broke my neck why it jumped it and I like stick completely like took a spill in the shower and got up and everything which is warping and bending is it was that was a fucking bad one that might be Northridge
text Alex has one and that was like we were pretty close to the epicenter of that one and I remember driving to school that day and I looked at our buildings and all the glass in the windows was just waving was really wild yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah what’s happening
Tarzan Boy
give me a stool this year we probably took those from like the other show always use an hour
well I I hear some here’s a new segment it’s called Dan Harmon’s earthquakes up positions music sing music sing
yeah okay alright good theme song I think that this segment will be coming back just for the take me to here’s a couple things in my old age that I’ve come to assume about earthquakes number one company out of there by the way I don’t know sorry and if I got a really want to accept positions
you ever have six sepa’s issues about something but guess what
got A plus one
I think if you were if you were listening to that I think when you heard is commonly known as the audio registry is that was a glitch where you’re actually hearing a tail on a recording session where it sometimes the theme song for a segment actually also was used by a record label for what they call okay walk ins
and I guess that Matt. Johnson I guess you heard a little more than we buy things in bulk
think I ate the cheaper it is like the more it is like the same shape and then I guess that’s what we were hearing there and I don’t know if it’ll be in the final at it but yeah I have the same questions as you why did you let him out how did he make parole why was he released from prison rap about my upcoming rape of courses that was he said he likes to raise up my Maryland institution wise and now he’s going to go out and do what he was going for
Andy got out for good behavior that is probably a misunderstanding Happening Here
people
for murder and he wasn’t supposed to get out standard earthquakes earthquakes a position earthquake opposition I suppose if you’re going to die in an earthquake by something falling on top of you
that that’s also how you’re going to wake up
that that that that like in my thirties I was very scared about oh God the big earthquake is like oh my God she can fall on you and now in my forties I’m kind of like wait a minute like there’s two kinds of earthquakes there’s like rock and roll and like that those are damaging we see the grocery stores in like the fucking Ragu is falling everywhere in the Rolling Thunder thing that is a huge amount of bucking motion and I sent him all the last Ragu but those but the earthquakes that result in like I thinking like disasters like Global Network things are collapsed I this is my supposition that you’re going to waste I didn’t research it at all this is my supposition is that those Society profits we have six more of these
who made that fucking straw sound who did that
come on own it and okay what did you do with that critical or were you kind of like I don’t want to tell you what to tell me but if you can if you can just pretend that it was Sandy
eat you and it was like it was it’s okay if it was mostly I can you do the sound again cuz I missed it I missed it too
I got. That’s what I wanted to hear is it all on one half of it is it is that you were kind of like Jesus Christ this fucking fat idiot had a lot of Coronas and like I don’t need this fucking Bros see what was the fucking kill you by dropping shit on your head I’m not saying don’t prepare for earthquakes I’m just saying in a nihilistic sense I think what they’re not telling us is that when the earthquakes that big like no amount of shoes and flashlights next to your bed are going to stop you from having a cinder block on your head lately that is how you wake up in an earthquake that killed you is the fit regular because of ice and I say that optimistically because I think there are a lot of our worst nightmares are like thoughts of like where people are like cuz we hear survivors Horror Story
fixer guy
hanging are you on are we where are you cuz you’re like you don’t know you’re moving it on and we’re like yeah we need each other I could use a guy to kick my ass around here and it should be my shadow self but you’re basically me except you’re less afraid of the color turquoise like that’s all I know about you like I’m just like I could never take that risk like that stew outgoing and you’re like I’m not on stage I don’t care turquoise give me a turquoise shirt fuck I’m kidding I’m kidding
okay all right number six as ever you could do a speed round from 6 to 2 the thing that you really need to be afraid of is called liquefaction it’s it’s when you’re in a like a moisture area than dry because earthquakes can then create instant quicksand that will suck your body or house or golf cart instantly down into the Earth and as quickly as it happens reconstitute the dirt you are fucking Han Solo to live and it’s going to happen to Portland Godzilla was alive to store number for earthquakes
hahaha sorry like I ate like what when people start worrying about aftershocks
as long as the as long as the next one isn’t bigger
you’re done
if the first one didn’t destroy anything and then the second one is smaller than the first one
take me to take that string off the back of your TV fucking ride bareback for a while or watch HBO was like a fucking an earthquake proof TV I think that’s a rash on the nail who was the string and I’ve never been more embarrassed for you in my life but I’m just okay but it was a foreshock not an Aftershock because the next one was bigger yeah and we were like fuck that was the time to panic because it was like is this a foreshock it could be we won’t know until the next one’s even bigger is the next one smaller you can jump into a a lattice of jumper cables
that are all Ginger arranged to only make contact with the leads that the touch your body put the string on the TV and what are you putting the string back to Anchor your typical Furniture to the wall with a screw in a stud this is especially for people that have you no kids and pets like because it’s a relatively non disastrous earthquake can tip a bookcase with 10 d8 this isn’t funny Steve I’m looking at Spencer
I’m not sure this isn’t easy to agree with you
we are away from the dying
and the number one earthquake spell position
it’s not
the important things to have for an earthquake you should have condoms and like a lot of shoes I truly think a gun is a good thing because then you just like roll into a fucking store and give me all the stuff I need this for my family have you ever have you ever fired you’re going to actually know he’s afraid they’ll explode I cleaned it it’s a deadly weapon it’s a good one right that’s what my mind clean
I wanted to fire one
what kind of gun is it the Glock clean all right number one earthquake I just learned that gas lines have earthquake sensors on them yeah dance dance hot water went out and we didn’t know why and I called the guy and he’s like I’m going to check your earthquake sensor and I was like the what now and I was like yeah all these houses they got earthquake sensors on him and I was like well that’s that’s the great idea actually and it turns out that the electronics guys were jackhammering or some such on that on the outside walkway to lay some cable and that Tremor sensation trip the earthquakes and turned off the gas to the house it didn’t turn off during earthquake
sensors! Did you know earthquake pictures of a secret world of Their Own
and there’s a one-for-one analogy of a lot of the problems that you and I have and Tony earthquake sensor is like Napoleon
and it’s like went white as the a Randy Newman song starts with like a reveal that yet again it’s just a guy installing cable what are you going to change your touch sensitivity on your the first to know about my love for you because you know you got a hair trigger for you and you for me…… Once again I roll iroiro
I’m a professional Center and I picking up on your eye rolls yeah that’s not ironic you pick up a bit and pick up some more stuff yes we should have less of an eye-roll yes okay fucking Deluxe be on the same team taken and my job was to turn off the gas Bill Hader re-education camp
you will follow the the unused gas lines that run underneath deer
last night when I hear camp and gas so I went to not here to a Pixar character in the movie you were like the producer watch a screen test going why why do we catch that my family died in the Holocaust Yanks there’s a deep cut but there was a Community season there was on Yahoo and there was like an episode where Ike Steve Guttenberg played this guy that was like a producer and there was a whole thing of this movie David Maiden with my favorite thing was the producer character watching on a laptop the kind of like that and I just really into it like there’s nothing the story doesn’t have to turn on him being like he’s like
did he is but you didn’t I think of that could just got all these like reactions from Guttenberg like watching this movie that I’ve admitted he’s just a cold. It’s like I like I like comedy words like everybody wins the movie that a little odd that I think they sentence him to be like a sprinkler sensor or something and he but then there’s an actual emergency so there’s a real earthquake and no one will listen to him where it we know that story has he cried wolf den den but then because of where he is positioned like so he’s been sent to be a sprinkler sensor and he so he is actually privy to the fact that an earthquake is coming cities like action movie thing like what’s it called San Fernando with the rock or whatever he’s like going and Jerry
I thought it was more local
San Fernando what’s a rock and Roller Rink
my girlfriend is named after the San Fernando jokes
the it’s a movie that it’s a movie that introduced the world to San Fernando Boulevard culture San Fernando Boulevard Ramos Boulevard all right
Street what is it what are you what does a real emergency heat works now as they stopped watching Bug’s Life what it was like wait you mean the fucking protagonist caused the problem like that that’s going to send them another think it likely know I don’t know like I’m going to watch a bunch of bugs go through a lot of shit that the challenges them because Dave Foley’s character did something wrong and then was I guess we going to do anything Outlook Risky Business didn’t didn’t Tom Cruise do something wrong and he had to fix his own problem no Risky Business his parents leaving and they’re like going to be a good boy or whatever he’s I mean he has nothing to do with creates a design and has to grow up and fix his own problems with me
he didn’t like make his parents leave town
but maybe he let me maybe that’s why they left Sonic is a second, I want to hang out with Tom Cruise on the fucking time that would be less enjoyable story he fucked up another food and then he fucked it all but all went into the river
and then he’s like oh boy I guess I got to be Willow now you’re not Willow damn all right anyways whatever I suck I suck worse than anything that’s why I’m so cynical all right can we get back to the what we were talking about cuz I want to make sure you resonate with this character like you want them to be like his dad skip to the idea that what ends up happening cuz I like this device I created is there’s like there’s a lower Tech back when California was still being Tamed
excuse my belching there was like there’s a there’s there’s the water and the gas and the used to come in the same tubes
and there was less room for alarm
there’s something it’s like a it’s like a regression to more primitive World from Chinatown he’s acting like he’s talking about how like it’s like Flushed Away meets Chinatown meets Ringo what’s the guy with the lizard Johnny Depp played Rango
I like the tone and then you got he’s like oh man I can’t believe I’m in a deeper tube I mean but that put some more in touch with the actually just wants to contribute so he’s like always going like hey something is shaking and they’re always telling him he pick your battles your job’s not to Lake rock the boat and he’s like one of an earthquake sensor and they’re like yeah you can’t just see earthquakes everywhere so that a real earthquake I think it’s got to be him actually being like Oh that can’t be an earthquake and for that reason he bothers to show up for work and no one else does so there’s like a kind of Simon Peggy kind of like like he’s naive that poor guy he doesn’t know there’s been an evacuation home alone like he had so that’s why he hands up like the only earthquake sensor in a community where it really needs to
what’s the what’s the meaning what’s the meaning of the Goddess are like where does the where where are we at in the story arc right now like isn’t it I think it’s that he senses the destruction of a new unlikely family that he builds in a new community I maybe not if not purposefully like like like there’s no such thing as Like An Earthquake sensor like the earthquake side Quakes don’t have their own censor answer could there be a character that is the earthquake going I can can you canoe anthropomorphize the actual earthquake
will you cut in the form of someone would like a mental disorder that was like a human earthquake I got character is because they’re like they’re unpredictable and uncontrollable and so like what they’re our protagonist is learning is like it’s not about the false dichotomy of alarm is mm versus stagnation it’s about mirroring and sensitivity he need he needs to become a person sense and end end it when he thinks that there is none other than we all do it’s it’s it’s true but it’s not a zero-sum game in terms of whether or not everyone needs to do something he can like see he needs to realize that he’s like the most sensitive earthquake sensor of all but he was not sensitive to that he has to become more sensitive to about himself or about somebody hit that. Like that’s important his own self-esteem maybe maybe
or maybe like it like his in his mother or like like some other character like it a he realize it like I don’t like my job is to be sensitive and yet look how I’m insensitive I’ve been to the people that matter most I told Spencer today that my therapist asked me to start taking showers
we got the sent me and Dan have the same therapist therapist the perfect except fucking dirty and gross real conversation Rose I got to fucking weird public pool in the middle of a dump and I was like where’s this going, damn can I ask how many showers you to take a shower every other day that is 10000 time for a shower ever taken of my life is it different times and you’ve gone weeks and months without and people are shocked by that and then I was like I start working out I’m like oh now I don’t mind taking a shower cuz after a workout I’m like geez I don’t want this to be the case
I know I just I have this like almost inarticulable outraged that I know is now and fashion anymore but like I know it just leads to Saadia of like like people being like I told you you’re like fascinated by like oh what you you don’t want to take a shower but like we you just like fucking think about like how much you want to take a shower which is probably a lot if you’re doing it all the time and like that’s not like an accomplishment like you’re not like fucking disciplined fuck you you fucking shower head like you’re just a fucking shower person like you don’t get a medal for that but you also don’t get shit on for that like I don’t I know I’m never like sucking shower people actually problematically enough because I was developing yeah I did a shower people which is like a whammy you don’t want to put on a guy that can do fucking hurt you or help you
is this like she’s like it’s like I’m sure it said I’m trying to explain to him like like look man if you’re hanging out you know like if you wake up in the morning and you’re like I can’t believe my body’s been in this dirty bed for 8 hours Great free I’m so proud of you for feeling that way about your dirt level when you wake up and I’m so extra proud of you for like like that that carrying you like a fucking black stallion to the to the Kentucky Derby Destiny lies in you going into your child room of your choosing and turning that knob and just rubbing that water all over you I mean wow I mean if you’re not a fucking hero I don’t know who is wait a minute I’m being sarcastic shower in my sarcasm at its is available as a fucking water that I know you are not remarkable for Desiring to be cascading over you
should be fucking weird I’m like if I haven’t wrestled with a turd in the last 8 hours I’m waking up in a queen bed
if not last name of the third child room which lake looks like the jigsaw room and like like like like your dogs don’t go in the bathroom you know why it’s like that Sophos leg leg legume you never said to your dog get out of the bathroom like your dog has a natural aversion to the bathroom there like that seems like where you get cut open but your new house has some really beautiful and I’ll probably take a million showers and then and that’ll make me a great person you would like The Jig Is up people I know you’re full of shit I really think I really think people who takes cars are more disciplined though like I think at all the things they could say I think they’re definitely it’s like you know the military it’s like all you got to make your bed when you get up at like I think it really is like
this regimen that they’re like resigned to and that like good
from your habit but then the people with the hat they’re like so don’t you think you don’t you think maybe you’re you don’t have my habits because you’re unhappy that could very well be true man like I like that’s definitely worth peeking into let’s talk about neglecting like I usually do you guys doing like like what you may be taking your body into a fucking weird operating room and like spraying it with water just so you can like dry it back off get on the bus and have a fucking dude with a crew cut go like
took a shower
I like
I’m positive that the fact that I’m not into that like means I’m going to happier than you like great unpacking it will not like yourself on the back what did you just say stop shrub shrub is it the act of starting the shower at the effort it takes to start the process of getting into the shower, do not enjoy the actual hot water like raining down on you I do it I do if if if the alternative is being covered in sweat and dirt okay then I’m like I wish this was a problem with the water all over my body and I don’t feel that way about like
she just not that’s Rob’s dog does not like being in the bathtub getting a bath and she hates she hates it she hates it but once it’s done she’s super happy she’s running around okay so that everyone or is it just me or is everyone has been going to like it too I hate it too but I still do it little trooper and every morning I take them on you you’re not do you have to have a you have a fiance and a girlfriend and a love of your life and don’t don’t you want to be clean when you guys are making smoothie challenge and I don’t I don’t I don’t I don’t like I’m conscious of that like I don’t like yeah I don’t know you had a bubble bath phase where you were
no more bottom of glass
not lately you but you’re pretty pretty excited about bathing for a while and then you put your butt too close to the to the Jet and you’re sure it rated it and like a water balloon
we’ve all been there you’re the Icarus of masturbating to a Jacuzzi Jeff Flake is that it was done and I was like well it’s not bad that is what I really like to know that is what it is
violation like like that’s not a thing in the bathtub for all of a sudden just like I instantly felt something snap shut I assumed so it wasn’t like I could sit in the bathtub and be liked and release it was like I was like what happened what happened and I kept it and then I sat on the toilet where my anus must have felt like safe to like this is how we do things and then it just like let out this like unprecedented torrent that I that but it sounded healthy but it was like there’s like an out-of-town do you associate with your butt hole if it’s just like a bunch of water coming out and I was like oh baby I’m so French
paint for us pay the rest of the physical picture of what you owe on your hands and knees with your butt against the edge of the the edge of the tub and as a jet going into your butt and you’re masturbating because you’re getting penalized with the with a jet and then you press remember you saying for a few days and I found out that the best thing in the world I finally get it that is what he was supposed to be signing your fear your feathers melted then you fucking faggots ironic because I start bike my my Kinsey like scale started till I probably drift you know I was like hey maybe you’re a guy that likes a little bit but play late night for the fight like lately it doesn’t put you in a category people you just a dude taking a bath and like it allowed me to me like we’re all different who cares like what’s the line between
that I got comfortable I was like I don’t have any I don’t have enough shame to keep my little teaster tight as a little drum like a sign of like You’re vulnerable You’re like you know what this makes me feel good open wow and then it was like there’s no more to that story but I like that was a really powerful last and I think I might probably mention this in the podcast but I when I was going through this with writer’s block thing and I was like procrastinating and stuff and she said somebody really important to me because there was just a series of weeks that way by where I was like you know that thing I said I had an epiphany about last week about writing and how I just need to do this and that haha yeah and then I was absolutely positive that when I walked out and then I went and did the same shit again yeah I did but it was like she made sure
like because she made sure that that was the place where I could always say that that so I would never stop saying it so I was like first of all she had to make sure that I my brain understood that this is the place where you coming say
it whether it’s five times in a row or a thousand times in a row I walked out of here thinking I know how to write and I and I went home and I didn’t write and now and I did the same fucking shit and I self-destructed and they ended up not writing anything and I’m back again and it’s the same story as last time even though then we had a 45-minute conversation about how it’s all going to change and then I did it again chance in that direction and and it like the fourth time I was in her office good I got did it again or just get here it is again and this time I said but you know what I just making me think that you know what I think I’m doing wrong is that I need to do it this way instead of that way and she said you know what I think you doing wrong is that you think that you know how to do it right and that makes you not sit and accept
doing it wrong and like pressure you put on yourself to be the guy that knows how to do it is going to keep you in an eternity of of of trying to get it right and you’re going to be continually confuse and you got it wrong again and here’s what I hear when you say to me you did it wrong again in spite of All Odds I hear that we’re onto something because we decided last 2 weeks ago that like oh it’s all about this or that I think whatever makes you fuck up is scared it is like you don’t you don’t walk away from die hard because the time lacking gauges like you know you’re almost there are you you need to drill further it’s like that’s another way of saying forgive yourself for fucking up as you have like sight of the thing you want to change about yourself you not changing overnight means you’re at the site of the construction like
at the spot where the wall needs to be a door
fucking idiots
but then she was like
why is your white why you dirty dick disease why don’t you take a shower you fucking faggot
cliffhanger
your comptroller Rod price
I don’t know what to do do do
goodbye to you and goodbye to Steve Levy and goodbye to Spencer and goodbye to Dan goodbye goodbye goodbye from harmontown
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