Episode: 79 – Dangle, Dipping and Heel Popping

Episode

Episode: 79 – Dangle, Dipping and Heel Popping

Description

After some women demonstrate foot fetish techniques that audibly won’t make any sense to you, dear listener, the enigmatic Brody Stevens joins Harmontown for the first time. Later, Mayor Harmon is inducted into a prestigious alliance and Kumail returns to D&D after a month long hiatus. It’s a beautiful sprawling Harmontown, come on down.

Transcript

the lucky few taking it live here it at Meltdown Comics in Hollywood has listing around the world the video planet Earth harmontown is now in session
who’s the mayor of Hermantown
Dan Harmon
thank you
thank you
buttoning my sweatshirt in front of my gut is pretty expensive. If you cover something if you don’t know it’s there
are you saying you put on a couple definitely definitely a lot of lot of lot of stress at work and a lot of seeking Comfort know you’re on a diet and it’s just like that’s its own thing it’s discipline and then any excuse at work you just got here all night then I’m going to eat chicken and waffles because I deserve that and all that stuff I talked to Tina Samuel topless friends and writer on your show you said that you guys are ordering lots of gourmet food like every day they still pay for meals so we we we we we we really try to shove them
what was the what’s the average anyways and every Friday is Friday I get hot wings for everybody out of pocket I don’t know why
what are you a great opening to the show or just talk about being fat and Corrections in order somebody tweeted me to let us know that the Internet was developed for scientific purposes not military so I guess that’s the one thing we got wrong last week
the only thing I’ve ever gotten in history Buffs using our show is some kind of archive or are you aliens digging this up and then and putting it into your factoids about Earth yeah we don’t know what we’re doing here or just to just drop into a pool and we reach for a laugh what’s the difference between scientific Pursuits and Military and I don’t even know why people constantly think that they’re being scientific anytime anything beautiful has developed or invented the military finds an awesome way to turn that in the way to kill people and they couldn’t figure it out isn’t that great but it’s kind of like see it coming and figure out a way to roll it out in a way that would we enslave ourselves with the internet
you can use it you have to have a 6 on your forehead in order to log in to this level and get the orange clearance here I can just kind of evolved organically we found out something for the internet which we don’t we don’t we don’t we don’t we don’t want to like the top of the power structures we we like we like Twinkies we like to know we like YouTube to control of the book we by Sammy I said I was looking at the first written in the future and people very willful a submit to control in a whole bread and circuses thing right that’s what that’s what the Colosseum comes from like you do you go just give us entertainment in exchange for all his power and wealth that we all have like a fear like America weird weird weird very self-loathing really lie about our economy but we still are not eating our own feet like
Fillmore food in the garbage that there is available and then you know we need a lot of entertainment stuff like a distraction I think it was well well from the further from the Corrections Department will be brought up Glenn who brought the Earth shine. Now it’s a high-quality moonshine for the federal crime of his absence but Eric’s are absent that’s what the correction as we have a lot of transgender in harmontown fans is a lot that’s a very peculiar state to be in transgenderism
when she came up
I asked what’s your name and she blurted out Glenn Ford to have it wanted to send a letter of other things saying like by the way so the people looking confused at the internet where he is very much out of the transgender closet and things as Jane spelled with plain transgendered but not enough complexity for you
your name your name is Jane g a n n e just in case we got through the transgender Gauntlet without alarmed or confused he how do I dress I hear her he or she identify as a female and so you the pronoun I suppose anything could be but but she has has assumed a new angle of identity I don’t know what are transgender fans come here in male attire like I don’t know either and what’s funny is that half of the people you brought Levi up and he started talking about his his thing you could hear people in our la
being closed-minded about describing himself as transgender because he said he wanted it is okay having a mustache cuz he doesn’t ever uterus and you can hear people coronavirus you know he said something that didn’t put that wasn’t the exact way that other people understand transgender debate transgenderism I don’t even know what to call it but I am very flattered that cuz I don’t think you could get more Fringe psychologically complex inside of a human head compared to what’s going on outside your body and otherwise as far as that somebody that you would look at in line at the bank and not be immediately presented with something that they registered with you that you couldn’t you couldn’t have more noodles going on up there more more more more twists and turns more more reasons to be distrustful of the people around you more more more suspicions were more feared
somebody might make bully you for answering questions about yourself or expressing yourself as I am very very flattered I take that as a barometer of our our good work here in my good philosophy and religion and end that that that that any any person in that situation would come it would listen to our podcast and feel comforted and feel comfortable like you know I think that’s a transgender
I think they all are more afraid to say it there’s a couple of Trance Scientologist people who they identify a Scientologist but they don’t actually they were there not scientologists they want to be called Scientologist because they feel like a Scientologist but they do they’re not going to pay for pay back fast
being liked by clip-ins you can identify as a woman look like a man not want to dress like a woman Inside you’re a woman dressed like a guy and that’s the Nintendo
great I think it’s just breaking it up into different strata like you can you can stop there if you want your that’s cuz that’s a thing and then there’s people of that that that are in that situation that therefore want to know there’s different language were they take steps medically hormones as they transition. It was a sliding scale from zero to a hundred or are you from from left to right that people’s sexuality tends to be somewhere at like along a sliding scale that nobody’s completely masculine or the completely feminine where do you feel you fall on the scale then
how close to totally masculine got into to the nether region
I don’t mind if you pulled up on his motorbike and showed me how to garden
I could surrender to I’ve never even had the time or energy between Adderall and Homo I would fall because it’s it is there’s too much going on in the header upset with me and my various like kind of Kinks and things like that I’m just sort of caught between like hetero and like a sexual like I feel like like like some weird shit happen to me when I was a kid involving like hanging out under the table while the 70s pantyhose clad women hung out and like there’s some kind of like it’s very very strange things that I that I consumed as pornography then said that you would not consider pornography
what what’s your favorite Thanksgiving I invited Mark Ruffalo over and he and he was like you don’t like nice trouser trousers your napkin under the table and you saw that my grandpa was wearing like a kind of a high heel he was my grandpa well if he’s if he could pass you know there’s guys on YouTube do that like they’re looking around
legs and tights and I live there to do a little a little shoe play you find something and it’s like I really like what you’ve got me Michael
yeah you know you have to look closely for that Adam’s apple right in the back of the calf
I didn’t know that what is shoe play tell me one more
when is it okay what does it at three sub-types if you play I’m glad you asked
what is the date of the difference between tangle and Dippin leg crossed hanging off the toe sexy secretary Library under something like you know or just alike just the leg is fine fine with this this old-timer
how many people are in the dangling and Evans
you did it shoot out of his wow and you said that you’re dangling dipping pop in the hole I have an eclipse last night
England open shoot pool pop-up what is dipping dipping is like a shoe on the floor as far as I understand it but it’s an audio podcast
yeah but I don’t think she’s going to be able to dip with those shoes
imagine like a loser. I got high heel shoe or a or like a flat or something that had like easy like you can get your foot in and out of it so dipping is like the woman is like in and out you know like kind of
I can also I’m getting weirdly like
making me nervous we’re getting we’re getting to the city limits of where are it’s not going to be very happy listening to music
I want to know about Django some dips and then then then what’s your name Madam people listening if you’re listening like I’m not this is not like I’m not I don’t want to be wrestling with women
it’s pretty important but I wouldn’t I wouldn’t tell her the equivalent was Aaron you know
no no no
anyways okay OK Google what’s your name an angle some dip and Nanny get the dipping is good of a stand up and then then you say you’re at pretend you’re checking somebody into a hotel you’re working the computer and your kind of have Hatchet minded are you like yeah that’s Dippin
all right although other now I’m wondering what what he’ll popping actually is cuz that that about to like I can’t do it in the issues I’m having such a mess up your heels for the pop song
somehow I’m still not turned on I don’t understand. I’ve never I’ve never seen the Allure of dangle unless you unless you pop the heel heel popping Enthusiast just want to see that hopping on a hill over and over again and yeah that moment you can stop now.
all right, let’s let’s take these lately
are more listeners Awards the live audience down start the laser show
tune visually
I never thought about that laid out in that diagram
is it all together
play Goodnight folks
Dan for The Listener describe the Jimmy Kimmel situation what would I be I feel like I’m part of the problem saying there was one there was it said that you know the tabloids Greek letter that Jimmy Kimmel segments that was sort of like Kids Say the Darndest Things is having kids talk about how to handle the various World crises one of them being America’s trillion dollar debt to Japan to China and one of the kids kind of halfway through chocolate with a little kid flash tree thing said like I don’t know maybe we should kill all the people in China and Jimmy was like
flash cut to headlines saying like you know apologizes to China for the you know genocide jokes on the Americans in comments section say
I just I don’t know comment on any of this I’m out
all I can say is I don’t I don’t care what you find funny I don’t care what any of us think you’re funny I don’t care about the empirical definition of humor but I just got one question are we going to be fucking Coneheads what are what what is what are we going to do what is it what is this world going to look like in 2070 do we really think we’re going to achieve some world where everyone just kind of quietly Glides around and someone like him it’s a proton and it’s the equivalent of a fart and everyone liked haters do you really think that once a new starts tightening it ever gets loose you really have you ever experienced anything that indicated to you that once people started introducing the concept of limitation anything ever got more liberated I know we all think that we were Advanced because they didn’t have the Seinfeld masturbation episode in Victorian England but there’s another way of looking at this if we are we are we are becoming insects like we are
have and and not embracing anything the primates have looking so forward to the day when we are have a hive mind we just barfed trophallaxis to do each other’s mouths and that you can tell from the chemical where you been where you going and then we just we just love it we can’t wait we’re just standing down the little bumps and edges like a gazelle femur
meaning of pheromone you’re you’re getting flushed and excited like by bashing the world around you trying to follow a little little little anomalies and get all the air bubbles out of the waterbed mattresses this Finish Line that you think you’re headed towards I I I feel like I can see it but I feel like I know it’s not it’s not going to be that the fun kind of gleefully sacrificing Liberty for security people that are learning how to be offended know where Guatemala is on a map online after the show my life is evolution Jack and everything is getting better I wish I was saying that the English language languages are probably degrading because we’re all like trunk heading language
language is always evolving ifucking disagree with the I think that language English language is a huge language and we don’t use any of the words we will use five words that mean one thing we do use one word to mean 11 things that’s not the growth of the language that’s the day that it that is the shrinking of the language and if anyone wants to go online with me and have a conversation about that I’d love to I don’t think that were evolving at all with technology and it’s not just me being grumpy old man I really do think that the language dies every time people say what the fucking word that people use awesome sauce awesome sauce, like a hundred and eighty synonyms for the word nice and we use knives for 180 of them because we don’t know all the fucking words anymore
what’s a nut taciturn what the fucking word that because we miss used it for so long that the dictionary just said fuck it now it means it means relaxing then like we we don’t need to wear it to say Alexa I love this great show we went from Uncle creepy foot fetish Corner 222 Grandpa Grumpy’s vocabulary police parking
the dictionary in your iPhone x don’t use that dictionary have a fucking real Merriam-Webster giant oeg have a big motherfuking dictionary with you at all times and use it
fucking Google weather Google weather says it’s 73 and she’s quite funny if you if you say dirty things you can do you can have a good time in bed and I talked to the other Siri yeah I got like I’ll say to Siri like why don’t you go fuck yourself and then and then she’ll turn on her Siri and then Siri’s response which will be like something like like I think you should watch your language would you like me to look that up on the internet
how do you like it bitch
I blush if I could
that’s my fetish very sexy hey do you miss traveling with your besties like a girls trip do you miss going a huge family gathering Viking soul food do you miss meeting the parents so I can get out well actually, no one messes that but you can still do all of these things with me Desmond Thorne on my podcast adventures in Black Cinema each week I take you on a journey through a new black film how it relates to the culture and sometimes have the themes relate to my own life so there’s always a little tea and a slight bit of embarrassment and of course as a filmmaker it myself and one of the black is Phil nerdiest Phil married like ever you’re always in good hands
adventures in Blacksburg, but Desmond Thorne executive-produced by Amanda seales new episodes every Tuesday on all major podcast platforms
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nothing to break or spill it of course they’ll smell fantastic like a Mexican tit house
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he’s a he’s a thing that you’re getting with quipped that I noticed when I got my bike it looks like Easy-to-Read booklet there it’s kind of indoctrinating you into a tooth brushing regimen that the except it’s like if you’re into self-care this year and you should be because the world’s dying bunch of people that have studied to the point where okay they’re going to send you a new toothbrush head the minute it’s yours is going to be worn out a new battery the minute this thing stopped vibrating like you, it’s it’s a subscription to dental security dollars and if you go to get quip.com harmontown right now you’ll get your first refill pack for free with a quip electric toothbrush at your first refill pack free and get quip.com harmontown
yp.com harmontown did you know that Farrell audio is a whole network Jeff
the only thing I’ve heard a lot of you know I know we’re part of a fucking Union of of brothers and sisters what’s the temp like of unpaid to talk about how many types and here’s another member of our family of Mr Brody Stevens
you know thank you for having me here Dan and Jeffrey it I am wearing a hat I just flew in from Toronto and I was able to wear kind of a knit cap thing it was cold there was bring the energy of Toronto with me here to melt down what’s the Toronto seem like is it like a Seattle in the north you know you would think so I was told I would say it’s like more
I mean it’s like Buffalo obviously it’s it’s near near they they share the the Niagara Falls I learned about that I’ve been to Vancouver but I’ve been a couple times I was doing shows last night and I think they are it’s just a little too little different up there you know it’s like it is America but it’s not
right there I like, a Canadian comedy audiences I think Canadians have an awesome sense of humor I think the quiet game if you were fucking shitting all over Canada we let’s be honest if I do in a club and underground pot Club
what is a comedy club there’s like six clubs out there were used by other they smoke pot they do shows underground meaning not legitimate like like like Secrets behind but they have a big comedy scene up there for that and Toronto so I was doing a show last night in there smoking pot in there and I’ve done I’ve been there and I know where I podcast I’m going to focus more on the podcast my I have I did what I did something with the assoc I think one time a girl saw I don’t have foot fetishes like it because that because I’m a heavy duty leg man and an eye out because the terminates at this beautiful part of the
Terminus then there’s a branch of the whole like the foot when you say foot fetish it gets into like I want I want someone to walk and chocolate and then walk on my face and then end and masturbate me with her toes and I want to eat the toes we put the other toe on the butt stuff
Sandalfoot it just like the foot is a beautiful little. On the sentence that is a woman’s leg hi yeah I got called out for looking at a girl’s foot 9th grade I remember it vividly I grew up here in the valley San Fernando Valley and she was like you know any of these and I can say like a stoner chick but she smoke cigarettes and then I was like looking at her feet just didn’t do what I was really I don’t think I need the dipped in chocolate I like looking at I would do what you said with the feet on the penis I’m okay with that when I was in high school at Lake High School in Early College my friend Chris to do his party is in his father was a sheriff and they were awesome because they were we went and did the parents room one time there was tons of bondage gear like lots of fucking chains and whips strap-ons and all kinds of good get it on kind of shit
husband and wife they didn’t care that we would have these parties and everybody would get naked in the jacuzzi and everybody would suck each other’s toes
we called the truck job
which made the unsexy even less sexy back and I got all the all the pathogens have been it comes out here if you’re going to suck a toe you should hot water would be a good place to get started I think when you’re looking at beach on on the internet like what is the what what what’s going on what was the what’s the fantasy that’s happening and I just like it doesn’t go beyond that of fetishes like it’s like the object itself is like this thing that’s more important than anything and it’s a it’s a really interesting question because I think and I think that’s part of what makes me
potentially a sexual sometimes a roach bite Behavior like if I if I’m if I’m working and I’m too busy and then I’m sorry I’m like okay I’m going to gratify myself cuz you know well excuse is that a prostate cancer going to come get her I think I earned his fourth 9 he said I think it recently passed maybe but it was like 90 like all the time every day and that’s what I’m going to be there that long guys remember that a couple years ago thank you thank you guys and thank you thank you thank you for all groggy to live forever then last night they would have just left me out there hanging. He’s a little a little more laid back there not responsive super high I was in a box
also try to have the street meat they have the fucking those carts with the with the hot dogs and stuff in his quiet cuz they’re all the time of a proud member of the Zankou Army but I went to a place I mean Falafel King it look like it has very nice and I had a chicken Tiki marsala or something like that it was it was good it was better than Zankou and I hate welcome to Toronto is Multicultural it’s great people get along I grew up here to Los Angeles people don’t get along I lived in New York people actually get along in New York you ask your together I grew up here Valley busing I’ve been all around and you were talking about you know a sexuality and things
and if you do listen to my podcast of baby 9 months ago
I I didn’t come out on my my podcast I am I’m 10% gay Bangkok and I pushed it to the Limit you were talking about strap-ons and Adam’s apples I got pulled into the night of Bangkok and I went there as well as be more pacific Brody I can’t be too I think the more talk about it the more comfortable all I can really chisel down that story you had a ladyboy encounter in Bangkok about 10% gay Bashers the Bangkok experience because we all go there if you ask
dad is almost accepted over there so I count that it’s like a 4% in search of a lady boyfriends or the lady boy find you by accident was it was it. Why you go you hang out I was over there working on a project and you hang out and you go with the ferry was just a nice pool sure they’re very outgoing massage haircut late at night all that stuff like it’s a good vibe I could go for a late night
I’m going to hand job from a guy named Cameron I’ll tell you about that off camera
funny you should say Kim but I’ll get back why is that a code word for something that I may just fucking get it out of
no I’m not I’m not gay like that it’s not that way they’re talking about do I see a guy like he always got a great show I want to kiss his his stick his beard no I’m not into that all right if I went over there to see all right can I see my mannerisms and I got picked on a nice guy and kids are cruel and I grew up here in the valley Jewish could I should have been sheltered by Weber school district hago Jetstream New York City I lived in Brooklyn
three years Williamsburg L train before it got half I was there
I’ll tell you what if I did that that ain’t so bad that ain’t so bad I watch locked up raw and I ain’t that bad nobody in Hermantown is is going to judge you first three holes are went down and then I came back and I went a little further just to see just to see that line and maybe go over it
there was a hotel in Hollywood and freaked out doesn’t it people who date your 50%
so much worse since I’m not in the hand-holding I
I I am in the I’m in the human love so what happened at the hotel Tim and scuse me a k a i can’t give the name away but you know what I’ll tell you what did he ask for me I am very active in the community to TSS transsexual and when you say active in the community what do you mean
because you know what it’s very popular if you were to go back in the day my friends ran taboo video up in Seattle which was the number one grossing adult video store in Seattle is right before DVD started coming out and the number of this day if you guys are still make it the number one it’s it’s 50s Duff and that’s the number one thing for whatever reason I got does that mean like chicks with dicks is that that’s what it is because you see your breasts like there’s no problems and then you go is it a girl or I don’t know I’m in Bangkok at something got shaved down is this you got to like it’s the sixties all over again just rock and roll I’m a comedian I felt like I had it to do that to share that story with you is that it is a guy who wants to move on
messenger
I mean if you’re following some sort of like Trey like I kind of start Meandering towards like like more specific things
I saw a girl like with a nice butt and I just wanted to put my face in it and I can return to be right there I’m not home what gay guy want to put his face in a girl’s butt when I just confirmed we didn’t say that you were gay I am 10% new segment is like asking someone to wait they are you going to work at a carnival and just how big is it is it raises interesting questions because how do you go because like that for instant use sexual preference as a binary dichotomy that puts a lot of significance of the difference between
I’m assuming just being sort of a computer programmer of a whole thing I got to bed late like there’s a but if you’re living in a genuinely if you’re living in an open field after some kind of nuclear Holocaust and there was running around in deerskin togas and I’m using bottle caps for money and and there’s no more like like you know there’s no more magazine covers or search Billboards to stick out of drive home and then the difference between 20% and 30% is what I will definitely agree what would be the meaning of 100% heterosexual I think I would have ever imagined to be less straight than what we consider straight nobody likes anybody that’s been overtly masculine or feminine being such a good girl right now for our guys being such a
I need a gig we can meet a gay guy let’s say and he’s really Queenie that where is you out pretty quickly it’s like enough with the femininity middle you get the more complete of a person you become a really Butch lesbian a little bit like to lean towards the middle and I was saying towards all things like like see both sides of everything and like I’m like kind of combined the beauty that is masculinity and the beauty that is femininity look at the if you so I think nature goes in bell curves I think that’s probably pending things in too much too but that’s an easier way to understand things that
that if you if a frog lays 2,000 eggs then you’re going to look at like there’s a there’s a bulge in the center of the survival eggs you know and then there’s Fringe eggs that don’t survive for one reason and Fringe eggs that don’t survive for another reason that every everything goes in a bit of a bell curve so so IQs there’s a bunch there’s not a lot of incredibly stupid people there’s a bunch of people in the middle that are running everything and I know there’s not a lot of incredibly smart people who are you know all here tonight sexually so sexually stuff around tomorrow ality Isabel cuz then I would assume like I think what you’re saying give to a hundred percent straight means actually some kind of weird inside out weird thing where you’re so straight you’re not even human yeah because because the bell curve would probably be well if I put my penis when I don’t know what’s up and then later I find out it was my friend
another word for prevent us from doing other things the same way that is incredibly sober person who sobriety defines every conversation they have is just as annoying as a fall down drunk who you can’t you can’t trust there’s nothing more fascist than a hippie like I got to go really hard core hippocampi the mud fish istic most dogmatic assholes will ever talk to like like like temporary little bit like I’ve seen both sides of it it’s hilarious that can NASCAR that. Once in a while for breast cancer awareness will paint one card pink and there’s people that are really bummed out about it it look at a big car go in a circle
hey if you could do like the color pink a little more are you stuck your wife a little better and fucking take it easy yeah
every white car is Pink
we’re back down to 10% to go back now

are you sure you didn’t wash your white car with the Pink Bicycle a red a red bicycle god dammit
what about your mother know the language I was.
as I’m with you on that on language I want to I want to go on a whole thing on that I mean he’s about talking like a steampunk person otherwise that how it’s progressing
I’d like to use it more absolutely I will quit but I will do so I think I agree with Jeff is that is that there’s a danger in in and getting trained by media and in each other that everything is either awesome or lame if there’s no more words for different kinds of awesome like yeah you’re getting trained to choose between Pepsi and Coke either fooling you and then I realized it was a difference between corn syrup and water so linguistically you think outside the box but that is exactly why I bristle and freaked out give very uncomfortable when people campaign in parade and things in celebration of just grabbing a couple little because it’s like it doesn’t it’s that you don’t even see where that stops you just didn’t you you think that you when you when you don’t make up words for a living at like maybe it’s harder to see how you can’t just
point at something across on the other side of the room and I want that potted plant out of here now department could be perfect you know that’s not how it works like you’re if you’re free or you’re not coming out of the womb with the freedom of speech the Constitution gets drafted up by some lawyers and says you have freedom of speech next thing that happens is unless you say fire in a crowded theater next thing that happens is unless you say this thing in that thing we can all agree that this would be a terrible thing to say is okay all in favor of eliminating it by I fix this this week get whatever man this is why I love what a boring conversation and I’m right there with us but here’s the thing I don’t I also don’t like people that aren’t verbal thinkers necessarily who think that they shouldn’t speak because they don’t have the same kind of word power I don’t like
people feeling censored by smart people I do I do I don’t like people being bullied because they don’t know how to use an apostrophe I don’t like I don’t I don’t think that someone who speaks grapefruits is necessarily going to be the most articulate person in the world I think that the use of seven words if there’s only seven convinced we can still create a revolution and and and hang out like the seven words in an order that’s going to make everybody sleep over so well that you’re that you’re amazing like Yogi Berra I like like if you got to keep my lap wrapped all the Time by Eddie Mallot prop is it was it was a shake for a keg of malaprop constantly said things wrong and it was using the language perfectly and you can’t tell at some point that he did he say it wrong on purpose or by accident but because he said something really really funny really really really good I was going to buy played baseball at Arizona State number one played their star.
what position does a picture I think you’re 10% catcher
wake me up at 3 might have a name forever episode
peppers and Catherine somewhere
so I think some of that comes from being in that job world not being in that the artist world I definitely have those jock energy and experiences and also my pre comedy experiences to you know that really kind of like I carry with me and not necessarily in a good way and then sometimes I’ll see myself like I’m working on a project also and I can go when do like how we argue over Warden argue over, day and then I think like who are you where’s your where’s your you don’t want to go into like specifics here but because I get that freedom to talk and I maybe it’s cuz I’m sure I’m neurotic or there’s heart disease in my family I got to get it out and when I do and it really is hard when it’s your living or your own production and its
own you know introduction of America and it’s truly not you getting to do that so I’m dealing with that and I think it’s all a combination a hybrid of everything you know hopefully when I come out on the other side I’ll grow from it but you are feeling stuff about yourself but also you’re hard on yourself about it kind of gay bashing yourself about his experience like I’m a grown up I was called or what are we called his help me because people want nice people around you know and hustling and hard work which I got you no help me in baseball but I think throwing up maybe in the valley at the time going to Publix go to public school
getting bust out to South Central maybe it made me tougher I don’t know and then playing baseball with like that then that’s early hate a little bit of hazing and then when I started doing call me like opened up a lot but now when I see myself on TV sometimes I can I kind of see like I would pick on myself I don’t know what that is I don’t know where that comes from your own self-loathing from we don’t all see that in some of that you and your self to but I’ve learned I’ve learned you know especially lately like turn it into comedy turn it into something uses a positive and I get a lot of support from people again I’m older and you know Twitter and the internet and all that stuff like it has helped me and doing the podcast just like emotionally Resaca bad guy but you exude like your voice your posture is very like loud and like like if you seen my sport seeing very like like me
Jo-Ann craft but like the way you can still like you can’t totally hide the fact there’s a there’s a a softness to you which is not gay it’s just as it was just being soft and negative terms for it if you’re labeled as soft or not playing sports I am getting I am getting used to that maybe at some of those jocks sensibilities and me and the fact that I’m still around that world a little bit of a round Major League Baseball bag I’m getting out there and it’s also just talking about it. And you know I’ll get not being hard on myself and then you don’t be I don’t want to you just keep doing it and I think you just work through the fans in there it’s like that I don’t need therapy to be honest with you and I
I’ll put it out and it’s like we’re being professionally I have like how to do warm-up and I start off noise….. The thing that I cranked it going to work at the midnight show with Chris Hardwick kind of thing it Go in nice. I’ve had some experience is what I’ve done video podcast and I got played completely to the camera and then people in the podcast feel like I’m doing a podcast lot of things going on but you know what I’m comfortable here with Dan Jeff Dustin and the what would be the big we talked about this I think last time a couple shows ago about something
like Dan wants to be perceived as a smart and other people come to him and want they want Dan to say that that he smartly what what’s what’s what do you want people to see you as or were you afraid that people seeing you that you wish they didn’t say
weird
weird how weird thinking about stuff that doesn’t matter you know like that’s a whole nother thing I’ll text you and what’s the fear of being perceived as weird like I don’t want to be just like you talked about it you bring attention to it it’s like you know things that we notice I’m sure you know you’re an actor you see yourself on TV like some people can’t watch him sell Johnny Depp doesn’t watch his movie Jared Leto free do you know I know that’s there you know that’s normal but it feels like it’s a it affects me a little bit more but he’s doing a Comedy Central show now right are you I’m doing some of that is seen myself on that my fear like that’s all I was thinking about like my regarding that would be one weird so it’s kind of I don’t mind it but I don’t want it to be a Pandora’s box of weirdness and we could turn into a joke you mean they’re going to find out your way like my eyebrows weird about my hairline my mannerism
do I think I’m gay what why do you even think you’re ill that kind of stuff and if you revealed all that if if you took off your hat and showed us your hair on your eyebrows today and I was in Toronto
hiding behind so exotic last kind of beautiful pantyhose clad legs
apparently with my Matchbox cars rolling them gently up and down or Cavs
I feel like I feel like researching that stuff that I don’t know I haven’t had red hair that married into the family but I was in the red headsets and kindergarten
Chris McCormack if who wasn’t she was the first girl that I ever felt hormones generated my body about like I was in a garden teachers would call your name and then every time the teacher would call my name is a Daniel Harmon Nicole McHugh ago and every time you take Nicole McGee Tyga
and we never spoke we never spoke to each other but she was my first lover that’s where the most beautiful relationships I’ve ever heard of that she had and she had copper red curly hair yeah and I started back girl so I don’t know where it came from you know like them because Batgirl was like a huge like a cork got popped they’re sexually so excited the opening credits of Batman my brother would be like my brother love Batman and we would play Batman together like it we put ski caps and stuff on the on the banister to the basement pretend it was the bat pull in like get dressed up as back again till I can get to the bottom of the stairs and I heard the Joker’s broken out let’s go get them together and then like there was a title card in the Batman title sequence cuz I know how being a producer I guess I I know that like I must admit design Craig was probably 6 of 13 or something I would not regular so there was an
opening title card that was either there or not there and it wasn’t a picture of Batgirl but it was always there when she was going to be the episode it would say and I would twitch even though I was absolutely years and years away from generating any kind of fluid that would have anything to do it with that I was just like transfixed and I was so excited that that girl is going to be involved and but you would be flying around with in her red wig around and kicking people in very often getting like Batman with big there was a black spandex or whatever and a lot of like bondage a lot of like they put a lot of like that when I was a kid like it was a lot of like like I remember being a kid like squeezing myself in between like couch cushions and getting really excited and thinking about Batgirl
and then I start Temple Grandin squeeze machine and I went over there I couldn’t move and do you think your sexuality is a moving Target or do you think that you’re slowly honing in on a fixed Target it’s always been there. Do you think it changes as you as you grow or do you think it’s something that you’ve always been there that you just now getting better at finding I don’t think I’m good at finding it I have fetishes and I think it are almost as the name would suggest they’re almost removed for proper sexuality I think the I think the eye fetishize things and then it’s like it removed me from sex like the my fetish for women’s legs is a clad in a material that essentially removes the chaos from them that turns them more into cartoons you know it’s all about removal and like like fully clothed
women just to hang out I like I’m just sitting there going to
and I gratify myself and then I’m done you know I did my little penis knees and I ago and it’s not it’s not romantic but it’s not sexual either thought you fall in love with a woman and you know when did you welcome her into your life and you like like like them during the courtship phase like there’s none of that going on and that because you love this person other than that your sex life is involved with theirs in the courting of them and stuff and
and then I go back to work and then all the sudden the mic Golem again lake lake regarding this. I’m just using like his fetish object to like get through the day so I like to answer your question I don’t I don’t I don’t have been honing in on anything I think there is always been like this sort of childish a sexual impulse that’s like unhealthy like an outcropping of sexuality you just masturbate on your lunch break that would I often do my friend. My little OCD work as whatever closure on this one thing talked about the show I don’t want to think too weird okay to weird that’s the job guy in me but where does okay
the gay stuff where it goes I can’t be involved in baseball two very jock World on its conservative I’ve done a lot of stuff for baseball to in my heart I would hate to be there and go oh there’s the guy who goes to Bangkok we can hang out I don’t know I have some big nightmare nightmare assistant unfunny not reflective of make those are my everything else I let go I got to go on I’ll be on at the Nick Kroll Show I’ll do Chelsea Lately or I’ll do you know what’s ahead and do a personal and we talked about lady boy stuff we talked about 10% gay stuff and it’s kind of not in my hands when I do it here or I do it on stage with a Combi store on a podcast it’s kind of funny and I know I’ve gotten a Twitter email
your vision and then you have to kind of give notes based on their vision and then it’s like it’s like it’s like a C+ but I know what I mean that’s how I feel now I could be you know being too hard on myself again thinking worst-case scenario that’s why I even asked why I’m carrying this is what’s funny about you what’s like enjoyable marketable successful about you is the fact that we want to watch you go through that struggle they want to watch a guy that that that throws a curveball in a fastball on a breaking ball and that was at 7 also goes to Bangkok and might have an encounter with a ladyboy and also we don’t want you to be like totally okay with that we want we want to why don’t you have to come home to your kitchen at and I’d say OK Google look up some stuff and I don’t want you to judge me before I finish
okay here’s what happened and that’s what I would say give me 30 minutes I’ll be closure it’s little OCD and the protagonist that you are is is is the struggle like not to be out like brothers karamazov there’s two brothers one’s really idealistic when’s really realistic the Middle Brother that he is torn between those two things it’s the struggle between here’s what I think I am. I wish I were his and I know I am we want to watch you fucking flip and flop like a fish out of water about being you being alive what would you like 6 for how tall you say me to 711 pounds I take psyllium husk
so Macho and then the other part like like like Brody it’s okay it’s alright cuz sometimes I don’t want to complain you know I just need a little bit of hand-holding sometimes especially with this subject on the door I was on The Comedy Tour and it’s like sometimes it just felt like it’s hard to communicate on your own personal project and email and then I mean at least I felt like let’s verbalize something so it it’s tough It’s a struggle I know that’s how shows are done hopefully I’ll get another chance I just don’t have a heart attack I don’t want to have a heart attack if I don’t want you know Molotov cocktail to my phone to my wonder why don’t we don’t ever want anybody here at harmontown
like agree on is we don’t want anyone to have to change themselves for anybody else but just keep being like that’s that’s really beautiful really yeah
all right good I’ll take that to keep your fists in the air and keep being soft and hard at the same time it’s your own euro coins spinning on his head I can take that as a good that’s a good metaphor I’ll keep doing them learn to deal with it exercise meditation casting I’m going to get through that.
listen at Festival friends on Farrell friendship
that’s how good you you dismiss Brody right at 9:11
didn’t know such thing as accidents man
it’s the second worst thing that ever happened to this country. I wanted to cuz I offered him then you can play D&D with us cuz Aaron’s not here tonight but actually I think I brought him up too late but let’s get to mail out here cuz he have
Jesus Halo stranger that Camille nanjiani
send
looks like it’s been a long time I miss you so much I miss coming here a lot of the Facebook so you’re doing so actually I have been performing on stage that much I really haven’t I was last night I was in New York and I performed there but I really haven’t been I haven’t really been that you have other friends you like better than ice in New York is a yam I’m like my schedules all fucked you’re all over the television trying to be ya Camille nanjiani thank you
thank you what percent am I gay for you I’ll tell you that
it wasn’t good for you
that makes you a regular person
all right wait before
Saint Camille
I want to get coballes I just responds to this
I got this email not because it involves you but I just want you I wanted you to be here for this right
engine stand in harmontown
this is you know I’m 40 years old and I I came out to Los Angeles and I wanted to maybe write some TV and some movies and things yeah maybe meet a nice girl maybe get married moving to a big house have a Goldendoodle how much even allowed in my dreams step by step but there is one dream I didn’t even know what this is I actually had until this email came in
God I can’t do I just this is from Karl Knoll a junior 11th generation distiller from the Knoll a Distillery
on behalf of Ketel One
email you
we would like to invite you to become part of the Ketel One Alliance
an exclusive invite-only VIP program as one of the select few members you will receive monthly Ketel One shipment
a dedicated concierge service
and personal access to Ketel One experiences and opportunities
I think it had pretty much every The Cadillacs.
You know what’s crazy you say the guy’s name his signature is on the stocking bottle and words all right no laying right here in Prides itself on being an ultra-premium vodka that aligns with authentic influential leaders like yourself
we hope you enjoy the handcrafted bottle of Ketel One and clothes and look forward to welcoming you as part of the family we are excited about the opportunity for you to represent the Ketel One Alliance
Adventures of booze yelling at me
for the planet
that segment brought to you by a fernet branca
play King of Italian Amari
all right so is another.
I think you should have got this email volume on the map but not. Because because he’s had so much to drink my manager called up Cadillac and they have a car called the Cadillac Catera and he said Mike my client plays Lisa Cantara Lisa Cantara and also it’s like subliminal marketing
I said so is she called up can you just give her a car that glow when she drive it in the shower so I can’t guarantee that we’ll talk about it on Leno and counted it shut your goddamn car there I thought I was going to try to change my character’s name to Porsche 911
Association
notice before my fascination with 911 predates all of the tragic story but they’re just too it just to express how excited it’s fucking big news man that’s a story about this is you becoming the Highlander this is this called me authentic
they came to me I would called me in an inspiration
it was a form email or that was a that was a handcrafted email to go
we don’t we don’t know that we don’t know that it’s a cool ship like that
going to happen now do we know what the outcome of this will be he’s going to be drinking more cattle one now that this has happened
the rest of life is improv like I I become a constellation that’s what happens
hi I join Ursa Major in bed and Archimedes in the pink Drink himself into the cosmos
is that what you’ve been trying to do.
Like like a boy that makes me happy that is amazing I got a letter of recommendation from spinach
we just want to let you know Popeye
you’re like the Popeye of vodka is where I get my strength my family has a relationship with so that is what I’m imagining that I’ve been to the writers room at Community up in Paramount and this there’s always giant Costco size bottles of Ketel One their courtesy of my assistant Spencer if I can just bring him out on that presser everybody coming out
sensor
what’s up
I I saw that email before you did about your Club ownership or whatever Alliance membership
yeah you look so stoked I mean I’m not getting any free vodka vodka is a huge responsibility of mine you might be getting late. What does that really mean they’ll bring you the Vodka that’s what that means you can call him at midnight and be like I need some fucking vodka at at 12:05 your doorbell
do you really think that’s without yes Drew Carey had like Baba Budweiser like that kind of hookup where he said
Jesse is the Budweiser of comedian that is.
Gary he said he’s the king of beers like the number of a truck pulls up at his house with kegs or cases or whatever he wants like the Budweiser is on the house like forever but that’s you what kind of want I want that was Vivienne Westwood suits black truck to pull out Bike Night Rider and I just be a giant rack of Suits call size 54 UK size and I just did just push it all into my place
I don’t know what mine would be I guess video games I would take some Valium and definitely
I want to see the Xbox Live all right now not to be provocative but not to like probe how do you feel about healed about what you’ll popping I feel like I don’t have any but just cuz I’m still just happy to be there you know like I’m just like so grateful just to sort of be involved in the process of fact we all feel but what is there anything that turns your head and like like Mr bransby I’ve been married for six years and I still will take any part of her that you let me have
it sounds so sexy
surprised
that was an anal sex joke about my work really hard for me as we all must somebody’s somebody’s giving it all to look at to learn how to fucking hold a camera and I can get the girl in the frame and I can’t say I don’t like it when the girl looks into the camera frames
what’s it like to talk to the camera I like not at my best right now like I don’t want to see I don’t want you to see me like this I’m pretending to be the guy at the way I do that right now how am I I’m not involved I know I’m not. But I do like it I wouldn’t be watching it I don’t want them to ask him because the fuck when the guys talk it’s over it’s over you don’t know what are you can you please stop cooking and doing that shit
doesn’t like being fucked by you and now nobody wins the biggest turn-on for me and point is when the gal at least appears that hopefully real realistically is enjoying it weird but I go if there’s like I go for that for sure she’s into it
what is great but it’s always that fucking Site Area check is fucking weird
she’s a good at it I don’t like when I get to take a bath and then I don’t I don’t I don’t like that recruiting is it’s it’s it’s physical empirical evidence of the girl enjoyed herself there’s an online look like
there’s a lot of you think so
yeah it’s it’s sort of a stunt am I being lied to by the same thing as the dichotomy between which which which is actually remarkable how this threshold has been able to maintain itself in a society which clearly holds nothing sacred anymore I wish that you there’s network shows called who Wants to Marry a dwarf or you know who wants to eat spider shit for a for a for a chance at a Verizon job over here in the darkest days possible it is on our TV is what was on the TV in the background of Time Bandits have gone beyond the pale of Paddy chayefsky Vision in-network all the way into just like people hanging up that on over lava and die
but we maintain this sexual Obsession here at 4 there’s a dichotomy between what we call pornography and what we call reality actually everything in our society has become pornography of the fucking species so is it is interesting and I’m going to I’m not going to be cynical about it I’m going to I’m going to say this is adorable about us that we are so
obsessed with sex so in love with it and consider it so powerful that we hit we still have been able to maintain the Schism for the the people that are willing to have sex on camera yeah that guy I’ll just talk about the guys cuz I don’t want to you know we’ve had with a dented our friend at the Armada on here and you like like I’m not going to I don’t want to add to the fucking landfill of misogyny that must be rampant in this is it when you go into any pornography so let’s just talk about the guys there’s no chance of being Politically Incorrect about that dumbest fucking people in the world are the only people that are willing to do it like we got it look like when they improvise their dialogue
he’s on the hook she’s willing to have said you don’t have to you don’t have Spike that football this evening
I mean it might not be true but either is the idea of like a slap in the face with your dick in your if ya just a weird Urban inflections Rich never can I can everybody can everybody stop spitting on everything getting pierced and covered with butterflies and what about the poor little forty-year-old guy with a little dick just want to watch a librarian stay your books are overdue
we have to do you owe me so much money and have the guy like Ron Jeremy or something like troll guy that represent me go
well you’re going to have to do something
does this book is overdue what are you doing what are you doing mixed makes what makes a person hard as a diamond
threshold goddesses opponents without fathers

Alia Bhatt
but that is Debbie Does Dallas is a big atonement with the father in there called doing Debbie
I think it’s weird to think about how it’s the only industry I can think of that good and right now and we will be fine forever because there is so much I have to watch one video for the for the second time
but you can watch more every single day we’ve been fighting great at it for so long you have that one image that one video that you can go back to over and over again. For some reason his potions like a sword always watch it but I had to be done before the achieve penetration
and John just how far away so I would watch it but right before they actually started fucking I had to like common be done before that because then I thought that it was that that then it wasn’t a sin I don’t want the guys to have a talk
don’t talk you don’t like them even if it’s not like terrible if they talked it better be fucking interesting and fucking
do you want them to talk about how we don’t use words at 11
the girls has hopefully you let me suck your dick to go to the guys he was in his voice about the characters I can actually hopefully used as an adverb is being misappropriated there if you were saying that you would like to suck my dick is full of Hope
can I yellow wood
and I chose the one that’s questionable.
the number 911 for many years
Dragon shine
yeah let’s do that or do you or dispenser want to talk about his debut as a network doesn’t seem like a good transition
why do I crave nothing more after sex than Dungeons & Dragons but well that’s funny because when I play Dungeons & Dragons I crave nothing more than
no it’s a game that I can buy and dandy with sex I fuck every goddamn thing I mean
but yeah I mean you I kind of dropped it on you like a sandbag yeah because I didn’t want you to have to worry about whether or not you were supposed to say yes or no. I just wanted you to have the luxury of having it thrust upon you yeah I know it was a really a really good methodology there Wednesday my my days he was in like a total of four scenes right leg is that like a guest star role in the morning Lions any theater in school everything you know I mean when I was in college I took a speech class but you didn’t even have to like memorize so like I was your process you really I mean not like a lot but you did
that’s my rule when it comes to vomit I mean get a lot because the combination of weird anxiety and eating garbage is on the time makes me feel weird sometimes so that’s that’s what was happening it makes you understand why you know famous people are all about a health because like you can’t afford not to be healthy if you’re vomiting when you’re supposed to be in front of the camera like you’re fucked right yeah you can’t be sick at all
I don’t care why did you have a good time because I mean I don’t even talk to people that are near me
arbitrary decisions about what’s a spoiler and what’s not but he was with Danny Pudi Alison Brie and Brie Larson leg and he was looking for a part of all of these scenes express enough how
my job like to finish this sentence without being applauded
that’s your car is just like the Midas touch and how many many many like punch lines to go like okay it doesn’t matter if you are nervous or if you know that that it would just be like cuz you seem unflappable like a lot of people cannot handle what why don’t you stand up on the slightly higher platform because of what we like about you most of us to become so conscious of of of the meta context that we actually kind of can’t keep being the version of herself with the people value down here yeah but we brought you out of the audience of your dungeon master Brooklyn 400 people are giving you a standing ovation for Rolling dice of stuff and and it just like your kind of unflappable maybe you’re puking in the bathroom I guess we’re learning but but but
jobs and stuff to their eye on the set of community it’s like you’re used to it like never mind the rafters like you’ll hear someone talking like 7 feet above your head is an apartment but it is a crowd it is a town hall meeting surrounding you and three cameras on giant dollies and I don’t know how I don’t know how I how to what extent I be able to Act Naturally in that environment and actors have to have a kind of psychosis because they have to know that the cameras there and they have to act like
I don’t know what’s there but they’re up because the camera needs the back to certain way because he only know you on camera you’re onstage and nobody asked you to be your on-camera the documentary nobody asked you to be like your your your persona is the Spencer that we know which is the guy that why is everybody looking at me yeah maybe you whether you’re sitting like a Canadian goose my we don’t know you’re just being Spencer that we all know and love but yeah I mean I don’t know I think I can force it used to look like Joaquin Phoenix by presenting an award at like like in 2 years
not that that’s an important goal but I think it’s I think I think it’s interesting that I don’t like seeing the clothes are off on a weirdo
can I say one thing about the what percentage do you think Spencer is what percentage Katie think I’m a 0 on the Kinsey scale I think my getting there when I’m pretty sure I will say this about myself is that one of my biggest regrets is going to be that I’ll probably die without ever having sucked a penis not because I just feel like it’s an experience that so many people have and I just want to be able to relate to it
and it’s never going to happen I don’t want to do it in the ass I don’t want to get fucked by a dude in the ass I think most people would do such a specific thing and I’ll never have it
come out you can do anything you want
it’s crazy to me like you need to turn the lights down real quick
Lake 8888
not bad voice timer
will you send me the stuff on that bed I didn’t know
like a closeted gay culture in movies like like another words architectural where you in movies and TV when closeted gay men are represented in media like the idea that they they pay money for the privilege of blowing another dude at a repressed we are dead men who are pigs and who don’t care about anything but themselves and at lake lake lake that they could be so fenced-in psychologically that they would give money something they don’t give you pleasure another guy that’s really do I get to eat that’s definitely gay like if you’re having a few fucking your dude in the ass you could be like I’ll just the woman to someone’s poking you in the ass it will be a woman with a strap on a penis
penis you know that’s a very top so you know you’re gay when you’re stuck in a guy’s dick but just thinking about another guy’s dick
that’s gay. Kind of a Budweiser e joke
I prefer something more important than that
DC Co-op
what does it mean it’s like humble bragging or bragging or whatever they get what they want but that email Seth Green
Jeremy Piven
Hangout
Hermantown is brought to you by the good people at Fulton and Roark the good people those are the best people those are the two things is there a little creepy Fulton to Fulton reception is Jessica work for nepotism and the glass ceiling, men’s fragrance aren’t we and grooming it’s a grooming company that specifies specified it’s a grooming company that specializes in solid colognes shave and shower products are all designed to make getting ready easier
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plus there’s nothing to break her spell and of course they all smell fantastic it looks basic guys are not famous for smelling fantastic you can use all the help you can get and who to get it from better than the Old Fort Fulton buddy Rourke has good buddy Rourke I don’t trust any work that spells his name o a r k I think somebody delicious fragrances that come in solid form
Tom Edwards barsa was designed to exfoliate the skin with or without a washcloth GQ Magazine just named Fulton and Roark shave cream the very best on the market today try for yourself at Fulton drug.com and save 15% off your purchase by using the code Farrell at check out your very first wax-based cologne or Salve will come with Spencer and you will apply it oh yeah we have a little of Fulton and Roark solid cologne will you treat me all right hold on give it to take off your pants on, Spencer’s putting on one of those Italian Renaissance of bird beak masks he’s ready to put them on now
alright let me just get my gloves on cam right now say 50% and Spencer will arrive at your house like a Mist 1971 provides the world’s finest homes or oil topical ointments solid and wax based colognes at a premium price for no discount. One of your life it’s me
far too long have we lived under the horrible tyranny of liquid-based colognes and fragrances replacing animals call Sultan Wok
we thought it was too on the nose
here’s some of our fragrances and grooming screams anywhere but says nothing can break a spell and of course they all smell fantastic hater of quality grooming products for men he’s the love of of wax base closed it brings Fulton and Roark together and exceptions
I was wondering why we chose a person instead of the word end my friend I know it’s part of my existence just as surely as he has designed to exfoliate the skin with or without a washcloth in likes and and ampersand
look, shortlist a little sweet taste I always do
I don’t get it last time on harmontown our heroes clashed with Admiral Dark Star the top of his black team the Admiral that the Hebrews were playing into his hands but Dark Star had a rude awakening as he realized The Shard were nowhere to be found after yet more disappointment Chris de Burgh not that Merle Dark Star from his post onto the ground where he was set upon by mulrain
Sharpie cast reduce person on himself in as a miniature man tried to trick the Dark Lord by Conjuring a crude figment of what he hoped would be the Demonic Warlords mother failed to beguile Darkstar Sharpie broke out into rap what did it mean how did the rap play out in terms of combat time was it actually Canon will find out tonight
that’s all I got
should we get a spaghetti and he’s here tonight to pay more rent in everybody
so yeah and play dies Christopher last week last week
did you know you have a
oh I don’t know how that’s a weapon I give it to other people like Rosie Allen do drugs
is it a cat-o’-nine-tails kind of it’s like two weights separated by a cord and you would want to let it go and then it’ll it’ll be like a connecting to ask superheroes
superheroes thinking of what we’re all standing on the ground is dark stars being set upon by there’s an illusion of a woman standing nearby concert news talking about this new patient I put a lot of thought to these days
everyone’s going on with dark star he’s being sat on his he is he is he is so much you can try
Admiral Darkstar we’re about to take a wire side of your head do you do you have anything to say about that yeah yeah yeah yeah that’s good did you have anything to say about that
he has nothing to say they all right he’s definitely not saying anything you’re so your trademark is your speaking voice to speak I think it’s because I’m sitting on him maybe I should move is not talking well you’d have to move more rain don’t I can bend down kisses face his face, didn’t I say that so how would I know what is it the neck being sad faces being sat on a presumably the neck has a bit of a jerk
all right I go to his back and I start cutting his neck you start cutting his neck say I’ve got some head
you are not happy with it and I say already came here you here pain like screaming muffled coming through like the anus
what do we do when you want to kill this guy I don’t know his limbs are flailing around
what is the difference between him and the power and have them UFOs and stuff give the floor to try. I’m sorry dude and then
Spencer real quick could you physically described as well. Looks like he’s you know just wearing black Armory can’t see any part of them regular 6 ft tall and the helmet everything’s all black and matte
I am going to look we can kill you if we want
we were cut off when we could have done it before you had freedom
I mean you say those things I guess he’s just staring at you guys
people who sell to his feet
that happens I mean do you just want to die
yes or no that’s how he sounds
what’s the what’s the time of and take him with us on our next adventure
what asaria what
he doesn’t respond if we could have
so are you out
it’s a good thing we didn’t cut his head off
I love Guns and Roses so I don’t know I don’t know we’ve beaten them and we’re just supposed to be terminated and I rifled through his pockets he stops you wrestle into the floor alright what’s your grapple bonus I hope it’s like 14 or something my grapple a critical fail a critical fail niconn like some sort of crazy nerd and before you know you’re on your back and he’s like.
like one of those poses when the guy has your arm and it makes you not able to do stuff for my slap my shoulder ice Sky scorching Ray
cutting his head off is not okay but I don’t like in the movies for him to try to kill us he hasn’t tried it all a feeling 20 damage or scorching you know missile and it hits him in the face in his armor
what are you okay what is it is he dead now. On the ground anymore he’s got you could definitely ask him what is it okay to ever wants to ask the question honestly I don’t I don’t want to ask him I say we just tie his ass up and we take this out I’m sorry I caused an extra epilogue sitting on a man’s face and sign his head off
there’s no there’s no dignity in that I felt uncomfortable do I get to the corner and start I take my shoe off what am I here for
you go to the corner
I can’t walk while I’m in grappled with my right foot I start dangling my shoes
I dip it right angle it a couple couple couple he’ll pop up a contact.
what do we do guys alright I take out the wires that go and I start selling his neck off again
so you start work ahead and he’s not doing the same thing as we did last time and you get a few Strokes in helmet pop off and you see there’s no head in the side as it’s all crazy you guys Happy Birthday know inside you see billowing black smoke that pours into the room and Swirls and begins twirling and continues this swirling into a black dark Vortex of powerful magical energy and you can hear a voice kind of kind of scream out I told you
if you did tell you I can confirm that you’ve become more powerful than we can possibly imagine something like that I can’t go that far to confirm we should kill them we shouldn’t have this is like the second time you’ve taken off his head and something like this has happened
he knows how do you know what do you want from us Admiral Darkstar Vortex of magical power
all right already have dispel that shit on their character sheet
no it said he might be coming out
are there is black smoke around him I cast a cheese victory
you achieve victory
cuz he’s really just going away right I wave the smoker go around continues to spin and it spins downward kind of like a spiral funnel cloud in a kind of you see it go through the group and then it disappeared yeah so it’s kind of like the worst episodes of Lost
but before you can react bling followed by a cracking followed by an explosion of Stone from the floor below is UCF metal quad hand maybe about 7 ft 7 ft in some dimension
Smash Brothers the floor the metal claw that grabs it attempts to grab cork leg wraps quark and grab them and begin fullingim towards this like it builds tension
almost like a cliffhanger
take me to Hermantown
Gianni thank you everyone
Brody Stevens earlier on
and all of our lovely have a night time it is I’m Jeff Davis your bear
Dan Harmon
I have to go back to the community offices where the writers are waiting for me cuz where we have to finish writing the episode the shoes tomorrow so if I’m if I’m if I shoot through like an aloof meteor to my car judgment into everybody
Xanadu but my fingers are too fat and I had a country song for no reason so I love you all good-night

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