Episode: 78 – Earthshine

Episode

Episode: 78 – Earthshine

Description

For the second time in Harmontown history a bottle of moonshine appears. It’s Integrity vs. dishonesty, Baby Boomers vs. Gen X’ers vs. Millennials, it’s Mayor Harmon vs. the bathroom at Meltdown Comics, it’s Adam vs. Levi, it’s Harmontown vs. the world!

Transcript

LOL
oh yeah
I have a very good feeling about this one
boiling point
Thank you thank you I feel obligated to reciprocate your energy I don’t want to hear you’re so how do you feel in contrast if there is lethargic I feel like you guys feel like you’re like Joey from Friends you’re like a Goldendoodle stupid twice I’m sorry about that. I’m sorry that’s the okay that’s adorable but stupid I said only a God could could could embody
maybe you are stupid it doesn’t matter
maybe being smart isn’t isn’t a good idea what it what is being smart me and knowing more about how we’re going to die the night what we’ve all found out as we’ve gotten smarter like don’t don’t don’t we just figure out more and more about Howard dying
dumb people at the beginning of the human civilization when the wind of the life expectancy was 25 didn’t didn’t everybody think they were going to live forever is that why they did some dumb shit because they thought that Gods walk among them and they thought it was okay to abuse each other and themselves because they thought that even though they only lived to 30 before they got eaten by a saber tooth tiger that that’s that they were destined for greater things and they never really died and ended in we slowly uncover the fact that we were actually only going to live for a certain amount of time and then evaporate into the cosmos as we uncover the stones didn’t we figure out ways to keep it alive a little bit longer ironically species to around 8 and we spend those eighty years knowing that life means nothing Jack schitt
toga wearing like they click murderers run around in the dirt
it’s just a bunch of a toga wearing Matt leblanc’s running around
what’s the best character in friends right Joey that’s the guy you want to be that was the Troy and Community terms like the kind of like a dog loves his innocent and serve looks at things in terms of vertically salt must be better than Pepper or vice versa are there is no salt and pepper
that’s what I always said about the Troy character I said this is a guy who you have to imagine like don’t judge any of these characters but the character of Troy knows that there’s 26 letters in the alphabet and and he knows which letter is more awesome than which if he doesn’t look at it like like just a wide he has but it’s not it’s all jumbled or awesome cuz it’s like shaped like a no more awesome way and then go put the keys are above it anyways what am I talking about how do I tell you what you shouldn’t do it you shouldn’t do what you did as a green room
I came into the green room and could smell it from outside the Green Room.
It was it was Heavy I made I made a boo-boo
and you weren’t there I came in Dan wasn’t there and I assumed an got here took a shet quit harmontown because he took I would have put her
so would you have like while I was doing it I looked at it looked up and looked around for events and stuff for your above till I quit while you’re taking a crap I actually started specting the infrastructure I bet I bet this is going to be a problem I think I’m poop in someone’s garage I think I’m going to ruin the party yeah it’s bad back there I feel emotionally the raft and yeah but get gastrointestinal clear
anyways let’s let’s do that I’m a bad person I took stinky schitt’s everybody knows you’re a wonderful Millennial Angels who believed in Civic service vote for politicians you believe in with your comments and your comments section Generation X your your bright-eyed and bushy-tailed your wonderful people you don’t understand why Instagram whatever ads
what’s your Instagram
I hate the Millennials Jeff
are millennials and Generation X Millennial love the Baby Boomers it’s Grandma and Grandpa you know Guadalcanal the greatest Generation because they dish it but if they’re alive they’re going like so the Japanese are good now
I’m supposed to care why are those are the Baby Boomers Generation X Generation xers YouTube like like we’re actually the Generation X Copeland whoever know that that generation get together like in Ender’s Game and has some brood you go by the start of sine waves and I don’t want to buy into the ship any more than anyone else however I can I do feel like when I listen to today’s thirteen-year-old talk I do hear my mom and I I do think that that our children these fucking like these new babies that are coming up I do think they’re full of shit like Unity I think they love
don’t have that like you feeling baby boomers were like sort of typified by
play Billy Joel with Woodstock in the space program
all right you’re right he did not start the fire
I listen to that song today
it’s just funny to me that you follow the phrase children of thalidomide with a guitar
hey do you miss traveling with your besties like a girls trip do you miss going a huge family gathering Viking soul food do you miss meeting the parents so I can get out well actually, but you can still do all of these things with me Desmond Thorne on my podcast adventures in Black Cinema each week I take you on a journey through a new black film how it relates to the culture and sometimes have the theme to like to my own life so it’s always a little tea and a slight bit of embarrassment and of course as a filmmaker it myself and one of the blackest Phil nerdiest film nerds like ever you’re always in good hands
adventures in Blacksburg, but Desmond Thorne executive-produced by Amanda seales new episodes every Tuesday on all major podcast platforms
anyways where was I don’t know where is with the thing and generation we keep our flannel tight we keep our hands in our pockets we don’t look we were like fuck you fuck everything fuck fuck fuck everything that has a gimmick fuck it all that’s not culturally either but we had one thing we perfected one thing integrity
how dare you scoff at that I heard I heard a full-blown like yeah those Adam Goldberg
carpal bone rap Integrity Integrity Adam Goldberg you have going for you if you sit in the corner of the room and go like fuck this fuck that fuk it at least get you you may be part of the problem you may not be a hero ever in your life but at least you know you have you know who you are and you know what you ain’t doing and you’re not planning to any like larger hand and I think that because now those people are having children and our kind of going to do it like it did like these 13 year olds have these has like a little textures and their hands and they’re kind of like they’re so excited about this idea that we can all be one and we can all unite and we can all recycle and we can all free freeze the polar ice cap I bet that but the general like result is that intolerable fucking cock set a 13 year olds yeah yeah
first I want to see the Ben Franklin 13 year olds
have to kick their asses they’re going to they’re going to be driving soon what was the last show me what I read online
I don’t know, sections mainly R12
I assume everyone online at all but they’re all 40 is like a spinner
but what but what about what about sexy 12
42 caught me I don’t know anything I’m talking about
Millennial way of thinking right there
can get away with it
flying and throw it out the window no one no one
if you said
we didn’t do that we did we did allow our country to go to war several times and didn’t we kept our flannel tight in her hand in my pocket
I really Placid ineffectual generation I would say no nope nope also if you could maybe yeah music XM radio station a shity song is playing right that is a fucking guarantee Jeff what a shity generation have the self-awareness and sofa face meant to have a pocket full of its own Kryptonite
that’s something that Millennials won’t juice all they want to do is bring sexy back
I don’t to talk about it anymore and I don’t want to talk about something we don’t talk about it cuz I’m Generation X and Millennials can go fuck yourself n m a i don’t know what I’m talking about
then I think of you trying to say is you want them to get off your lawn
not every weekend with your lawn mower at your mulch, we are at section and they’re frisbees in there hula hoops
Grandview Fox
America
Instagram said we’re going to have ads now I was disgusted by your response you guys
it sounds like it sounds like you’re the one disgusted by ads on Instagram
because I want people to
dog my dog sometimes cute when he’s sleeping I look at it I don’t care if it’s a tough titties for me I guess it’s hard to run Instagram I’m Generation X I know what’s up
it’s hard to make an Instagram
Intuit is going to be lame for you to say you’re 40 and Gen X that’s already lamp reinvented we called Generation Y Generation Y Generation Y like Baby Boomers went well I don’t know what’s true I don’t know
give me directions to Generation X cuz the baby mama said you’re like Generation X and we don’t care
and then will you and then the next Generation came on when I went and we don’t know why they were like
I only want to Trivial Pursuit Edition
what were the what were the trivia categories beyond the other on the pie of the Generation X
fairies different fairies have fangs anymore
alright what are we what are we what are we moving on to I don’t know
you really are a grumpy old man
I think wait wait wait you have a special guest I want to put her on the spot Aaron made a new friend tonight what she was at a Kamikaze which is Stanley’s convention I cheated a piano with some ladies I don’t know what the panel was called ladies of powerful ladies I don’t know sexy ladies I have no idea my girlfriend was on it but she she made friends with a pioneer of what is an institution which is kind of interesting saying and I hate that she has hair if I just awkwardly say everybody
did laraine Newman make it tonight okay
wow who is that guy that such an expert on her not making it
no
I would know if the Chevy Chase back then
why did I was hoping to talk to her a little bit about our mutual yeah we both work doesn’t make you a little giant shed you had probably 5in smoker out with my big gross like a McDonald’s poop
laraine Newman if you’re out there thank you for not coming you would have only smelled my poop
just a little bit I don’t know how sick she isn’t talking about I said out but she was there 1975 getting of what is now like this the Exxon of comedy of Comedy but it was a variety show it was just a variety show it wasn’t it wasn’t it wasn’t meant to be archived and you know about this was Coneheads number 3 of this is us NBC show to fire at Crater and bring him back crack when I was cool back back when that resulted in success
container in the back of the fridge that is that has got a lot of different colors that I can see through the translucent body
Jeff Jeff I don’t go and read it anymore and I don’t go on a diet
well hold your applause because this is a segment of the show called because I don’t go and read it anymore what the fuck is going on in Reddit
cuz I get tweeted things I got tweeted Jeff subreddit is twice and I don’t understand what the ups and the Downs a little picture of a Martian that I don’t know what’s going on I like what you wrote and I moved up and down my look at it one day and then go back the next day it’s all in a different order based on its own popularity
crack
all right so and I’m a gay and a Gen X I don’t care if Gaius back yet
Integrity is a retarded person in the one self self contained self-contained
some of us are self-contained good people Kurt Cobain
you seemed all right
on the inside
I don’t really seem like a good guy to me
have the balls to blow their brains out
do they have the balls to marry somebody who hire said she hadn’t killed come on she fucking had that dude killed
because you have integrity
that’s my point
we’re not going to go down as the coolest Generation X
yeah that’s true but we did we did we did to open the roads to a trade agreement with China
Conway
you say what you mean you and me
is really really drove it home with Chyna
Iron Man 3 had a special segment in it where he the Iron Man lands in China and says
that was arguing with generation does dysgenic we have now come to terms with the fact that we have to like them
to the point where we re-edited Red Dawn and airbrushed out all the Chinese flags into North Korean Flags, terms with it the wake of gravity
what are we talking about
okay alright so subreddit there’s a harmontown subreddit
all right so remember I find Levi yes I do with the shoes yeah so he treated me well Adam
you’re you’re coming up I don’t know what you’re talking about is that that I don’t either Adam has to come up and talk about this Adam is a moderator of the sub-reddit Levi was banned women who like to the Adam moderator of the Severn Adam created the subreddit
Adam would you like me would you don’t have to come up but I’m inviting you up to going to talk about the subreddit maintenance
this is a fact-finding mission how is adding beans to Iron Man 3 Integrity I was obviously being ironic
Iron Man
wow
all right we invented loving him
okay after Baywatch there was a series called Baywatch nights that everybody watched and it went more than six episodes and after harmontown there was harmontown.com and then section to the scouts harmontown so I created it someone in the wait May gave him a week off their back now and I learned a week off for vacation harmontown
what I got.
Minutes. It takes one to know one is either do I know nor do I care I don’t know what’s going on I just want to know I appreciate the fact that dragging you up here is your ear up at the plate with two strikes against you blah blah blah but I really do I am actually curious I also think there’s something here and entertainment value and I’d be wrong this is like the DVD, DVD commentary when I was talking about that brother I’ve been in the harmontown separate and I’ve seen like you know you as an olive Reddit you see everyone around you see the brackets and it says deleted what does that mean what happened
leaderone
like if you say something like Tahiti being something something you can be like I didn’t say that yeah, I just leave that person hanging there going like
brackets
which is why you have to quote extensively you said you’ve been welcome to the Zone hashtag on zone so our friend Levi Levi
is in the harmontown subreddit where let’s all let’s all admit that nobody’s tomorrow’s senators are not running running through the hard times. It is a hopefully a place where Mr. Field of Dreams of glory holes but there’s an animals mixed in there right
okay
it is a
place where normal interactions are theoretically possible but the media makes them squeal Earth and nearly anything else that is a toilet theory yes it is I’m speaking to you as a guy who won’t even go go back there cuz I realize that even the act of being there can cause harm to people so I’m not attacking you but I’m definitely curious and think it’s an important conversation as we talked about going to form a colony on the moon and you are the situation appointed or not where you created the subreddit which I thought was a I mean it’s a good place it is a good discussion venue but it would put you in the place of a moderator and now you’re in the position you got this band but and then you clicked on it for this guy who’s been on our show with no shoes and it’s crazy how you wanted to be pregnant so so what what what what what what to do in the summer
difference between cooking pan I just let it go let him go with post of Why Did You retroactively Justified if it doesn’t make sense one wrapped around me time so I don’t want to read this ever again Susan I was being the Dan Harmon of the harmontown to put the Adam Goldberg actor
bantam which is why this is so fascinating power has the ability to be arbitrary cuz I was annoyed it was getting to the point where every single comment was him responding to someone and I’m going to take this as a personal level back in January at the show at the Egyptian when I breast on States and embarrassed myself that was because I was thinking about harmontown almost all the time what am I going to say what should I wear for harmontown we place to be
and when you see someone who’s all there internet post our pay this relates to harmontown this is how I feel about harmontown is that how you feel. Harmontown realize that someone else is something that’s been plaguing you and so giving them it’s arbitrary it’s a sign of power and I regret doing it because the entire communities consensus was I should have done it for you right this is the Trap you fell into you if you felt like a you felt like a nerd and an underdog and you felt like you had you had done things that you shouldn’t have done and then you and then you saw someone else doing them and you were like yeah that’s what we all do and I think about how late is internet is not a venue for eloquence it doesn’t have a lot of eye contact it doesn’t have pitched I have a very high standard for word choice on the internet I demand one hundred percent being sarcastic
the fact that we can create communities about communities by someone who created Community your theory that Millennials are a really abstracted pictures of pictures of pictures of frames generation because everything is a 2 rated everything has a comment section everything is a direct response a way to yell at Clint Eastwood Clint Eastwood you are test LOL LOL and that’s our culture.
everyone thinking they’re terje it’s every single day in the high school library writing to every other Daria using this thing cuz we thought Kurt loder was as good as it got
don’t be trying me to fucking Kurt loder you loved him is he here I don’t.
Kurt loder
like I do wrong he did nothing wrong but it didn’t speak for us extrapolating from that is that a huge technological threshold that we crossed Generations depending on where you draw the line is that we went from passive one-way transmission into a interactive that means that they get to say something back doesn’t fucking matter to Rupert Murdoch what they have to say and yet we have to all deal with each other and the swirly Eyes Wide Shut toilet of everyone staying back to each other and gen-xers are coming from a place of like you know you did what you had to do and you put yourself out there and you know you if if somebody had something to say back it was it was it got back to you through less channels spinner or Fiber Optic line

and now it’s just we’re all swimming around in this turd pit you need to find out the address it’s a few clicks on your phone and I think that has a deeper effect than just being allowing us to yell at each other a little louder psychological or philosophical maybe you would call it the impact of of people feeling like it’s revolutionary to use that Medium to police each other in my day Kurt loder told what to dance to I never was a president above him who went to war with all the countries in Blountstown hot muscles and nobody ever questioned the politician does not have nothing to do with what the president did above him but but Kurt loder told the kids what to think and what the feel and the kids church
I told Kurt loder whether or not he was full of shit and you reacted to Kurt loder by getting your haircut different from Kurt loder or or getting your haircut the same is Kurt loder and nothing ever affected the fucking president Flash Forward to today we have a president and instead of Kurt loder 8 million fucking YouTube channels you have a bunch of people swirling around each other what you don’t have is anybody asking what the fuck the president is doing that’s why it’s a little infuriating to make it underneath the what used to be Kurt loder is now it’s consumed with policing each other it’s like they tricked us into like self hatred which is a common thing that happens all the time are you racist are you are you sexist or you forever and I’m alarmed about it because they they they they turned the key on the internet they’re like here we go everybody must have been like holyshit what the fuck
are they going to do
n a s a n a cross their fingers and close their eyes and then they slowly unplug their ears at all they heard was got milk ads
it’s a super friends doing what’s up motor in the internet there was a show called PRL total are 140 around with your factor between mass culture and prescribed it because you could totally request live
people would go to New York and make part of their hope it’s standing outside and I need to hear bye bye bye I need to hear bye bye bye. Now there’s nothing like that because you can watch music videos whenever you want you don’t have to hear a snippet of 98 degrees is new hit and you don’t have a music video television telling you whether or not this is a hot record or something that’s going to be into the pit with that affection that doesn’t affect how we react to the people who live behind his marble walls it’s a person it’s a person to listeners on it isn’t that crazy is that weird is that weird day for all of us to talk to each other all of a sudden has absolutely no impact level it didn’t do you think the patricians in ancient Rome where like all that guy that diseases stripling’s these of Route I think the dress code
that there was a new way to measure a rectangle sometimes I do get his fucking arms and let me out off but the guy that just died at the sun was at the center of the solar system a seemingly benign idea was forced to repent that wasn’t in the Bible practice is over 200 because now that we’ve defeated the Christian we have now we have we have nowhere power structures over, right we don’t have a religion in this world that’s like telling us what to think I think if you go look at to Ron or something that religion as a powerful societal influence can be extremely restrictive and what people say but also how they think they found that in some Saharan African cultures that if there’s no past tense there is no words that follow Concepts like promise there’s no word in Swahili for promise because
requires the past tenses I said I was going to do something now I’m not under that application words are directly power and when you give words like the Bible like that or like the core on the power to be absolutely true and free of the strictures of Science and free of the questioning of the man on the street those words gain eternal power now we don’t have that the internet if it was even there at all when is the first websites I visited was called the skeptic’s annotated Bible that was when I was a little shit it was 2003 I would sneak off from swim at summer camp and look up all these passages in the Bible and then like little pics in the side like how can that be true that’s mathematically what did it say in Genesis 1 and just the ability to
transmit ideas instantly against the strictures of religion has like a Martin Luther effect on changing our culture at Lunenburg affect you can look at the skyline of a city and see you the the buildings that have to do with money and Power Rangers power combo is not reach the stage how you been
I was just thinking about today is come up onstage I was just thinking about you the other day they going I got mail we squandered our Harmon our Harmony and who was actually building spaceships I was just helping people build them yeah but if any I mean you doing more than an atom in terms of space flight
can we meet Adam to tell us a big No-No No-No No-No No-No No-No if and all I’ve done is read and I’m just like an internet guy I’m not going out there I’m not actually talking to people it’s just things our bread if you go to any kind of area outside of a city things can be like hundreds or like or just at least 60 or 50 years behind what we think we’ve already beaten absolutely and that’s and that is when we talked about all that just rule area well that’s that’s most of the country of the world places where children can’t go to school because of their gender we haven’t beaten religion in Los Angeles we have in Los Angeles you could be gay 80 years ago and it wasn’t a huge deal in most of the country that is tantamount to saying the devil has control of your senses motivations and instincts
you are a flaw absolutely conceited you guys absolutely however like the people that are making things the people that I have constructed the glass in your eyeglasses the people that are like like as a society the people that have built the skyscrapers that are taller than the church is in the skyline the people that are printing the newspapers the people that are kind of like you know secular the people there in the silent majority like with its strong language to say we won we beat them because that implies there’s no more fight to be fought the what I mean when I say that is we have to get our shit together at a week we are empowered now we we we know how that logic is important we know I really agree I think that this is something very strong and I guess I I’d I’d like to broadcast out to the world I think everyone
the pick the path of least resistance you don’t argue with people arguing never convince someone of anything we just convinced him of something he told me that I was wrong about something I would have I would have fucking bad and it off because I’m a primate like me and you and that you changed me by saying how you felt about something and I was invited to make sure that you knew that I was also in that water that’s important to know when the most opened up and I just walked up I had no right to do it and you’re fine with that you know I don’t do it
but it just it’s fact that when you when you can. I’ve been calling you the Fox News comment section and just being like Obama trying to give me gay Healthcare trying to take it to the Telfair when they like go back in the other republics will be like I don’t think you trying to do that that hasn’t happened yet they just kind of agree it’s a nice little resistance to just going in to the New York Times Facebook comment section no matter what the story is interesting God is real and someone will pick a fight with you someone will pick a fight with you and then when they do you say that’s a good point but you forgot that God is real
but I can’t even remember what it was
what is this rabbit hole that we go down if you guys want to fight with with people that are you know that that that their worldview around something that absolutely needs to be argued with that are so immature about their atheism that they sometimes encourage them to just be Christian about about how God doesn’t exist like I feel like you’re protesting too much in like I didn’t walk into the bar feeling like God didn’t exist so much that I needed to get into a knife fight about it where is you do so maybe you need to go back to the thick spit and I also know atheist that are the most compassionate wonderful thing like that’s why that they’re technically live the word atheist almost
I don’t think people think when you become an atheist or Christian that’s like an achievement but no I feel like an asshole will be an asshole in any culture sure they’re just going to grow up and be like all this this is the way I get to be an asshole and tell people what to do and In some cultures it’s easier to be this way or that way it doesn’t matter it’s we need to stop thinking of the spectrum between atheism and Christianity it’s just you’re a cool dude and your nautical do and do that LOL was created by these programmers those bills created by the military to communicate ideas together because kill people give it to the library
I’m talking about the code that we the code that was built this isn’t there what is it 40 years old now what would it what is UNIX what is the code that we’ve built our entire virtual structure on it was I’m pretty sure that those guys didn’t go home at night and red rosary beads and stuff like I I think those guys are a Christian can I get back to where I started this all was you saying that you are now not on subreddit you’re not on the internet anymore because every time I get on Facebook and Twitter to seems to be doing fine like like likes and I like so I put dog pictures of my dog on Instagram and I am on Twitter and then on Tumblr I people can like send me messages and like like these kids
send me messages and sometimes they say like you know I’m gay and I want to kill myself and I can write him back privately if they were privately and go don’t do that it sounds like you missed out on everyone after that episode where you felt that you were hurting someone there was like no I want that and how many percent moments you have to shoot straight to the middle and I I don’t want to I want to get Warped by that idea is not hanging out on their I’m not aggressively I’m not living in a fucking comment section I can’t exactly like I, II is just a bunch of fucking anger a bunch of misguided spleen for no reason trying to get a reaction
you are in control of something in the first time can be reminded you of yourself you you you you you snuffed them out like a cigarette it’s an ugly ugly world like I looked at Reddit I went down a thing and something that people say very sweet thing sometimes people say I don’t like it here is why it is very very succinct and very well but mostly it’s just a bunch of Spirulina stop what’s going on here but watching for men talk about religion and politics is like the fucking like like like it’s all guys do a guys get together we have a couple drinks and we tried we tried not like we haven’t even talked about Jesus has choose which are fantastic but I did talk to the fuk up
call me now with women talk about interpersonal things in guys try to solve The World’s problems when we get we get together when you spiral around and do all the stuff on the internet to me is just as this weird spiraling look at it if I want to just complained all types of shit and it it’s wanting people to bicker and I hate bickering it’s not a waste of energy waste of a waste of the English language I hate I hate the the abbreviation of our language into into cliques and Grand switch your thirties predicted before typewriters and computers in before I went out for typewriter before people wrote through typing it predicted that our language will be reduced to a series of the short Grunts and clicks and end up dead end abbreviations in anagrams of discourse like that it’s
it’s shocking our language is dying and I think there’s nothing to be proud of a culture that communicates through feedback loops like that I think that it has no intelligence necessary and I think there’s no vetting process and has no qualifications for someone to go on there and moderate something to ban somebody to go on there and Flames somebody going to torture people to going to tell you to shut up for you to feel bad about that for you to even care about it like like my go-to restaurants I look at y’all because I travel a lot and I’ll type in Italian restaurant if I’m in the mood for pizza or Thai food whatever I want and you look at it and I look for the worst reviews and if I see some country douchebag or something else in. My day was
what happened I thought you had a bad time if I find the most bad reviews I go to that restaurant because that guy won’t be there
yeah well it so but listen so you go to the drawing-room you got your suit on you play darts you have the same conversation you have with the regulars there there’s there’s some repetition there there’s some inefficiency there I’m not standing up for what you’re talking about but I’m saying it is human nature there’s there’s introverts and extroverts there’s there’s people who want to look good and people who are better at making eye contact I’m not in that school I’m graduating I’m being forced to graduate at 40 years old I do not want it to be happening to me but I didn’t want to quit smoking either I have to get off the fucking internet and I have to go sit in the corner of a bar in stock that’s all get off in and it’s all just throw it in the toilet it’s about whether or not the internet and the moment there is a protest in Seattle against you
the World Bank or whatever and they turn their phones so people can’t say that’s all and one person says jail and didn’t commit a crime but for inciting a riot the Egyptian spring on stuff that they made our stars are telephones illegal because it can be very powerful we do have an in fingertips the ability to take down and institutions governments all kinds of things they are very happy to watch his just LOL at LeBron James is tweet about somebody’s asshole. That’s what it all is in the moment it becomes effective and we do anything with it like it’s possible to be great graffiti on walls with the situation as what they write the graffiti was incredible political screens and things like that that made sense and work provocative the moment we provoke anything on Twitter that they just shut off your cell towers and they don’t want you to
play communicate so we’ve been limited to is pretending that we’re doing or typing these things in and summing things instead of talking to the people making eye contact anybody we’re not communicating shit we’re just the opposite of communicating inverting like a sea cucumber like we’re not doing anything positive communication doesn’t have to be Revolution and fun can be fun just because we’re not washing on marching on Washington driving their trucks there and some failed attempts to take out people in suits and change things but not legal is always leave A revolution is always illegal Checkers you can play Candy Crush and he’s going to take your phone away from me with the moment you use our ability to communicate with each other for anything that’s provocative or are or possibly revolutionary that’s when it’s going to be a legal absolutely but I don’t think we’re revolutionising anything in person either and and if the feds are the only people that have phones that are capable of winterizing I don’t want to live in that
decide either cuz we were the last people I think that 1973 I remembered I was a child and before then the phone just rang and if you didn’t pick it up if you weren’t home then you can fuck you and whoever like like I ain’t coming and going to rain at we all look around and have a cocktail
we ain’t doing it and the beauty of its Solitude and I had a pager after anchor to the seafloor now like I can never ever be alone I can never ever be free and I think that’s my grumpy like curmudgeonly grumpy old man thing is like there was a time when you weren’t constantly Tethered to every fucking person is a guy who wears a suit to a bar and talks to people that hangs out you are getting a huge amount of usage out of the fact that everyone’s in a connected to the internet Yelp as one example that you mentioned right you’re talking you’re asking a different question which is why would anyone ever choose to emotionally invested ourselves into the conversations that take play right round the internet as opposed to the conversations that take place between you and your friends at a dartboard in a bar and a half
those conversations people like me are rendered completely irrelevant and also look at everything is irrelevant I don’t want to talk to those people I’ve seen those conversations I don’t get any joy out of them I don’t like I don’t like interpersonal small talk I got a damn word of those things my girlfriend published a book of them and I was I was forty years old walking into my house and yeah I remember writing any of that shit and if that if I would have I would have been no way because with a diary there would have been No Illusion that anyone I was out there reacting to me there was something strange that happen to me when I discovered that thing called blogging which of the dumb words and all my hipster friends were going like login
AAA and I would come home at the end of the night and I would be a medium in which I could type my thoughts which I somehow felt like
someone’s going to read this somehow it’s just some weird paradoxical things like I’m allowed to write whatever I want because no one’s ever going to read it or care about it but only if people could read it. Read it the erratically whatever right I think otherwise you’re not going to channel reactions or connections to the two comments sections and reading some things because I find that it deleted the my Reddit client from my phone and I’ve deleted my only connection
I believe it is not like you guys read it because it’s only against the secondary effects that can happen because it’s red it actually is such a beneficial media and I think because of his conversational town that it lends itself to The Gawker defamer kind of Spyro for a guy like me it’s because of celebrity in the intersection between celebrity and Technology you having a cell phone is wonderful for your life you’re an actor you don’t want to be in your apartment every day hoping that you hear back for a part you can go out you can live a life you don’t have to worry about the answering machine you don’t have to worry about not having an answering machine as someone who gets gigs while he’s driving or while he’s at a party or at a friend’s house being able to take my work with my pocket is tremendously freeing sure there some day is the phone doesn’t ring it all but it’s 7 p.m. on a Sunday I like to be able to know I’m going to work on Wednesday and I have to be at home are you mad at me
you’re lucky you might possibly convince everyone to unplug the internet flesh-and-blood efficacy and so we like to sit in the corners of our dark apartments or in my case mansion
because of what I write
committed to being a bad person I love or unhealthy but it possibly produce good effect by every night if you want none of us doing like like special dances among the Nobles look at a picture of a note that is
Town Hearth shine give more than you take is the slogan of harmontown I don’t even know what this is am I going to get up here
I’m holding a I didn’t know I think somebody must’ve been allowed what’s your name sir it says it’s a harmontown earthshine and in the slogan is give more than you take so tell us about this look so what kind of liquor is it
Shuffle distilled if you got a hundred hundred without 3430 proof
but I doubt you have to be after is Santa Monica tomorrow
next step is going to make the third one about like
if you still need from Priscilla I mix Bass with honey and maple syrup fermented out with the with champagne and then double and triple distill it I love you I love you I had immediate sensory memory of that Nashville show
but I’ve been here in the council Hall on your fucking car on that stuff
so strong like paint thinner for paint thinner kit
it’s pure like this but I use as a base for an absent that I make every year for people to start making us our own booze in the moon that’s brilliant so it’s funny so am I picking you up Homebrew
Iowa kids TPC metallurgical engineering Oregon from the Sun is about to happen right now
god dammit storing so much smoke in the World Trade Center interesting Natural Energy you had back
at what point you started dipping cheese sticks into Ranch and then just marrying their face
shave cream put on the Rocks when it’s an interest that started with you with making a home brew beer so you’re making stuff in your garage that’s designed to sip and get fucked up on but with Homebrew beer you have that sort of logical out of like you’re becoming more of a Timothy Leary figure I just am curious about its really it’s warm it was for me it’s more about the apps like every year guest list for the rest of his life
call my friend
thank you Adam
having a conversation about the nature of the internet I think we all have different you have a relationship with the internet but I don’t have because I’m more of a gregarious person and when I look at people having fake or perceived to be on forms and you are having this chorus it is actual conversation it just so quickly dissolves into ego and Mimi Mimi Mimi Mimi Mimi kind of stuff is just so much bickering and fighting that I can’t dig it but you know I like to go be alone in public I love being around people and not talking to them I got I don’t need that much
directions you know and I think it’s awesome if you said you don’t want to have that much of an emotional tie your ego to the internet as much as you do. I’m not allowed to go anymore I was I was talking to the community writer tonight at the drawing room before the show and he was talking about some guy was a professor or something at some college or something it uses the example of a phrase he used really hit home with me where he said all this guy was a Critic of literature and then he went to end so like he became prominent become prominent because you was good it wasn’t cuz it was bad it just became prominent he was a critical literature and then he would he would criticize hand life and then there were people that would go holyshit this guy even he can criticize he’s the best and there were other people that would go you fucking kidding me
fuck you lock you in a coffin and throw it in the ocean criticizing Hamlet go fuck yourself and it was polarisation this guy like like the phrase he said this a community right or telling me about this guy that really hit home with me was so it kind of warped this guy
which made me realize I do you know why it worked him because he was thinking about both of those things because neither of those things are true he should be allowed to just have an opinion about Hamlet
and if he’s prominent because of it that’s just tough titties for him and tough titties for anybody that listens to him he’s not allowed anymore to base his identity on what people think about him cuz he has entered the business of being prominent whether he likes it or not I didn’t boil boil you have sure he looks forward to the day when he’s not, not anymore but until then he’s going to be here between those columns he can’t be affected by the gravity on either side there’s some people saying he’s a God and some people saying is a devil and they’re all full of shit that’s like that’s not they’re not talking with a person anymore that has a feeling about it that’s not what you told anybody that I got to get the I have to stay off of forums Reddit, sections all that stuff because that’s where people will say that I am a God or a double I cannot I cannot let that stuff affect me anymore that’s great you’re great
chicken and grapes
hey guys
how are you guys doing tonight
I’m not you audience the two on stage
mad with power you know when like a friend or roommate or a family member takes a shower and like right when the door opens or like right after you open they open the door and it’s like it’s like hot and wet are yeah that’s what going into the green room tonight was that
I’m sorry it was certainly hot and wet like that’s not even that wasn’t even my fault
why cradle out of Lysol that’s on the Lysol particles distributed makes Lysol effervescent to cruise about the I just carried your poop like a Magic Carpet ride around the world like your poop was wearing cheap cologne
it takes of it takes a big man to take that big
an even bigger chance is to expose sorry because I walked in there a certain a certain essence of you is there like you left the scene of a crime that’s that’s that that’s all that Erin’s doorstep you can ask her about why I wasn’t in there she took a shet
are you covering for her shift know I’m throwing her into the bus and she can I’m leaving it up to her if she wants to talk about it or not cuz I was sitting I swear to God I was sitting in that room and it actually feel like I deserve it and I didn’t say anything to him I don’t have that kind of relationship with him I didn’t say sorry I took a huge shit fuck you can fuck all of its
I’m telling you my thought process I didn’t I didn’t welcome into that world but I knew that he was probably sitting there going down, I was just kind of sitting there thinking I just have this conversation came up between me and Neil and Aaron had an emotional reaction to it and took me out to the parking lot that she wanted to talk to me about and that’s why I wasn’t in the room cuz otherwise I would have sat there and I owned it only when I came back because it was one of you know how you leave a room and then I think when you come when I come back and do it it’s like a holy shit that’s what I knew I’d done a bad thing
I’m in a bad bad thing
zip code
cuz I was like I’ll leave it up to you if you want to talk about it or not I don’t see a horror movie and I like walking into the bathroom after you accept it can’t smell it anymore
identify with a terrorism of pants asshole
parking lot and I’m not a proud person I’m not proud of this but I don’t see Dan I was out of town and I heard a thing whenever I see Dad and I was asking him how is work how is the how is your walk to the store what was that that thing and then understandably tired and doesn’t tell me about Neil knew something that I didn’t that I was very excited about so I got bummed out because I felt like you didn’t share with me and I am I conscious of how much I’m not telling you kind of alone because you men are a the harmontown meal fantastic filmmaker
the harmontown documentary is sort of a Trax Spencer a little bit as it should Spencer is sort of a represent representative of the fans and whatever he’s interested but I do metaphor
explaining I’m catching people so because Neil’s making this movie that has to do with Spencer I told Spencer I think yesterday something that I hadn’t told anybody which was that I had recently willy-nilly Spencer in a Rowland community and so I told me oh I set up Spencer’s going to be shooting on next week so you can come from the documentary that would make a good spinal images see expensive.
so Jeff doesn’t know that you guys don’t know that Neal knew that yesterday I didn’t hear it was in The Green Room feeling my shit and Erin felt like she was like she feels locked out of my life not a big deal it was a big deal at the time I mean we had to go to the parking lot
also because we had talked about it before cuz I was something that I was hoping was going to happen so I felt like I was laughing too but I guess I was smelling my shirt this because
Aaron didn’t know I got Spencer
now I feel weird
I understand
please please dear I feel embarrassed I feel a little so that community at all hours of the day I feel like I feel a little thrown under the bus right now I just I just want I just want to talk to you I really have nothing to do with anything
MacGyver laraine Newman
I like I like that guy guy a picture of a giant wild like mr. clean like white T-shirt guy has arms folded biceps as big as his head no no laraine Newman alright 925
what does that mean
how to get rid of the dungeons are alive are in a gift set
so happy all day and nothing is wrong but happy
you can really feel the happiness
Lorraine he promise you
all right that’s what’s up you got character sheets so I don’t give the people what they may or may not want a little DND they go from the top down at yours and hers and then his I know how character sheets go I mean I see you pass them out everyday and you clearly do not
yeah by the way to Glen cook for that are shine I can call me fireman line that down to me I want to sniff
I love the sounds of diverse shine special people pass me that booze
Robin Avery Prince
champagne
Jeffrey
sober for 20 years
about Andy Dick
okay that go by check with Sam Bishop bubbles come up how do you how do you spell creatures
I’ve got that moonshine ready to go
I just cringe watching it
you don’t love me
Michelle got white trash it real fast
treasure if you would okay
Camille’s not here I guess I’ll be back as soon as we can get up here
I got one leg
how’s it going man and I love this homeless dinner has a has a kind of football cat but do Rak he’s a handsome black gentleman with a thin Moustache he is he’s a friend of mine too I was looking at character sheets when he came up but I did go to call it out earlier but I’m actually I live in a house with his brother
that sounds all right it was a dinner theater in Oxnard a place called the kitchen
are you can we hear a little bit of that kind of your lines you’re going to do each of your 10 lines and I will be the other character
in a segment we call dinner theater Door is now open I start off at
welcome to do at Waters Club Royale this is circa 1940 thank you guys for coming out tonight you have a vodka and soda please thank you
which one was Marco
don’t you have
listen to me and listen to me don’t look around while I tell you this I’m passing the schematics for a jetpack across the bar
last night when did you fire her it doesn’t matter
you get ahold of it we’re all dead
Rye boss
I’ll meet you in back I’ll be the one with a monkey on my shoulder you got it
I want this to go on for the rest of my life
damn that was very satisfying for all concerned if you likes to throw a knife with a string now he’s a rogue have no idea how to read this though
he’s a rogue he’s a thief he’s good at picking locks he likes trouble and he’s very conscious about tying weapons to Strings and ship them in trouble he loves trouble
when we last met Our Heroes had slain breath has metal weapon dark stars evil lair that’s right they climbed Higher Ground before the bug the surveying their surroundings above they were full of corpses coincidentally your to the null showed up this Melly Savage was acting suspiciously drawing the attention of cork and Sharpie using powerful magic Sharpie Read The Nose mind and discovered is apparently your chicken plant practicing blood magic blood magic to attack the party but the party tacked back whatever
after dodging his Blood Spells work let loose oh yeah that cut your cleaning to playing the evil know but as the party headed on where do voice rang out you pay for what you’ve done to our blood brother for a shadowy figure in the darkness but before the gang could pursue this figure it dispersed confused Our Heroes charged up the stairs and into the top of dark stars Dark Tower where they found the man himself Admiral Darkstar cut the music
so you just ran up to the top of the stairs and you see in the middle of this room you don’t see anything but a massive pillar of black Crystal and standing atop that black crystal is Admiral Darkstar fully clad is black plated armor and a black cape on his body and he screams out as soon as you come up
I’ll field this
Admiral can I call you dark

have I got bad news for you
kind of gable are shards in hair
yeah yeah here’s the thing about elaborate plans like yours
play in Vogue
choice on the part of the people being we felt like we needed skeletons
is there a dark minion who can speak for you and a lower register
I love the way your talking but boring don’t give him notes
happy birthday to anatolia’s the fact that he thinks he’s fully recline.
do you want some stuff
so many of you were you were looking for your dark minions Sarah probably don’t have any
no shards for you about to kill you now listen to me ask you this Admiral Darkstar
who makes a Girl Like You Admiral
pleased to meet you I’m General going to kick your ass
Stars
and I am a major bummer
and I am
Creative Murder coming up the top of the stairs where you guys are you see one of the one of the dark stars dark cultists coming up the stairs he’s out of breath he’s right among you guys there a cultist hold it right there
I’m going to I’m going to make a proposition to you
we’re going to situation in front of us here that I want you to look around and do the math Admiral director is about to get his ass kicked BR dark cultist
can you explain why I just kicked him in the test I kick my friends in the chest to thank you
I take a Dan Harmon style shit in to fill the room looks like Jesus Christ you guys did you see down there there is a bunch of bodies and they are all ripped to shreds and there is blood in buckets yeah that was us that we did that Jesus Christ he he thinks
one guy that faints at the sight of blood
oh Admiral
DIY he raises his arms in the black shadowy ropes find you guys for try to fight you guys by the arms will see if that happens
you know sometimes when you talk to a little and I will talk to you guys. Happens to bird gets gets caught by these ropes
Tamara black Santa Claus Can’t Touch This
black on black violence under back leg
yeah that happens can I throw a bowl Adam whatever you guys want to do
I throw a bowling ball ride ship I got to roll this dice you hit him in the legs and catches his legs he falls off the crystal onto his face Truck Yeah
well done
he takes blood damaged Cola
Camille’s out of a job
I’ve always wanted to replace come out
am I a Minecraft box now do I have any new text yes okay spit tacks at the
rope at what about like a knife
all right you have actual weapon
hurting other things more and realizes that she’s not going to win with using crafts
knife holder beef and I start hacking away at the at the ropes right testicle you managed to hack your miles away
you’re free.
Now that are sleeping proudly action
now that’s not some crowd reaction or was that whatever 6-speed has had
here yeah he’s like on his he’s on his face right now on the ground well perfect
do an easier where are these tentacles that are holding the very ground itself to get free online client asked you a question about the armlet of spring sure which I have always had in my arm and I have never until now asked you about
it’ll power being to entangle can I assume control of an entangled Vine that’s not really of all right okay I just drank 130 proof of my saw that was impressive is really good all right good I just slipped out of the the serpentine grasp of these things sure all right
reducing yourself to a gnome size size you quickly jump out of your binds in a way from the grasping tentacles
so so dark star tries to get up with no rain on him
do you want to try to like hold them down yeah yeah for sure
I’m just going to have to punish myself a complete my son. I’m going to try to make him think that he’s in a different biome by the way that I am sitting on his head
wait take that to me come again
I want him to believe that he’s in a different place
let’s roll it
he said he tries to pull himself up and goes
Super Mario
any he tried to get up but he doesn’t so instead he he kind of tries to punch you in the kid name
try as well either that or he just missed but in any case your your kidneys are fine they’ve not been impacted by anything I continue to sit on my face all right throwing yourself into a barbarian rage against your
yeah you free yourself yeah
thank you thank you for that an action hours of energy that style at dark star with your mighty sword
and you critically fail him you swing your sword back and you let go of it and it just lies behind your back pain and numbness weight difference affects you greatly in your face and you like three somersault kind of spins before landing on your back wow I get up when I go to take free damage from skin
all right I have a quick question so if I have this what is Bluefin poison is that like bad sushi
what’s more like a puffer fish sweet
give me the sneak attack cuz you’re a rogue sneak attack this guy with with the Bluefin poison on my knife
attacking at is back with your poisoned dagger you plunge it directly between two you know plates of his armor thrusting it into the spot where his meet is
wow that’s not cool what does right for dealing my to round it down
thank you to damage plus sneak attack damage which is for four and five what’s that you guys 1315 damage
he doesn’t seem too bothered by the poison for whatever reason but otherwise has been hurt but never saw it coming I must be nice
black people problems
okay I give you permission I’ll even give you a black car do you want one
but what I do with that but I just like imply for one minute that I’d just give it
get back to the arresting officer say I don’t need it I don’t need it
I like them I’m enjoying this
I’ll put it at More instrumental
from my position take two of my arrows and I
because I’m sitting on his head I take my two arrows and I try to stab him through his ears into his brain
desert combat maneuver that is a combat maneuver
the brain Pope
I don’t know how well I mean in this case it would be because he’s wearing a helmet
I guess you mistook my meeting you hit with one of your arrows in his head but not the other so one of them has helmeted head and stabs him right ear right yeah I got to put inside inside inside goes through the ear into his head parts right into his head made backwards
got to love that H1 N1 he can’t say anymore or something but that doesn’t happen to him he just gets hit for 6 damage
blood flows out of his ear
you guys are thinking right ahead
Marc Maron
Earth signs
dance turn them off and it’s called major image illusion with sound smell find heat yeah it was a pretty convincing I think I think your chest at the Great River for this car
14 Savage
it was a critical shit
mermaid tails
definition of good night
that’s the show title for sure right there was a critical shit
I want to create an illusion
yeah I’m a woman
that looks 20 years older than Admiral Darkstar but has kind of his face
in a bathrobe
Alice is serving and saying and I want to make her go
you made a mess go to bed
little penis pee again
fight it off
with my dentures
go back to bed I want to take this moment to thank you for reading by how to play D & D instruction manual
so that’s what you’re doing right in front of them
oh God damn be careful take alcohol weird I need somebody to drive me home we got a uber tonight
Remember When
I love you guys.
Tonight I made that guy’s fictional mom yell at him for peeing after work
are you talking about the fictional mom that threatened to bite off her son’s penis with her dentures
little bit of autobiography in now
I’ll let you figure out which no no Revenge yeah I see you you, you knock it off like I don’t have a mom
I mean yeah I’m not going to give you my back story everyone has a mom maybe you didn’t know yours maybe you don’t understand the cosmology of all the different planes in the Multiverse I don’t make the one thing that all of them share is that everyone comes from my mama
and maybe when you don’t know yours you get a little angry and you want to make the cosmology more significant than it is when it really comes in and I make her go that’s right
go to your room and I go yeah if you didn’t know I just I think that that suggests remember better if you saying everybody comes from a mama, it’s a great song anyways just roll for it yeah
I don’t want to negate that but it’ll just be bad drinking if you want here we go
Angry Mama memory rap
everybody comes from
every mama’s going to have a son
everybody needs a friend sometimes and he wants to lean on someone don’t expect to reply and when you fall for me don’t expect me to fly by where’s cuz I couldn’t find you what what you doing traps message through you fucking that guy again I just took you to the tennis court I lost the ball over the net a fuck your mama so hot
everybody has a mama’s baby
and every mom has baby has friends
and every tractor needs an admiral and it’s making me pee and everybody is alone in the end
Admiral Dockside
what’s the weather for e m
that’s a good detoxing your feet boxing meltdown one more time for Spencer Crittenden
Erin mcgathy
I’m Jeff but was happy I married a diamond
Newberry nobody drive home tonight

Published

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