Episode: 75 – Selling Like Hot Snakes

Episode

Episode: 75 – Selling Like Hot Snakes

Description

Mayor Harmon is joined once again by guest Rob Schrab and Erin McGathy plays the role of Comptroller. Spontaneous combustion, peeing your pants and letters from reddit await you in this weeks Harmontown!

Transcript

what’s the best silk sheets wet
good evening
town is now in session
Enterprise 40th birthday
join me in welcoming to the stage my old dear friend the mayor of harmontown Mr Dan Harmon
just come through are in Agave is Jeff Davis tonight
Jeff Davis costume is that it involves so much more than the necessary it is Eddie Munster
I meant you seem to have a bronzer all over your face all over my face today I carved his face send a Kenneth Branagh yeah well I mean it’s weird to have
can I get the posters just a mountain and then to rise above it but that button down at the bottom it’s a shot of Kenneth Branagh and Julia Roberts kind of running
what is a mud Love Is Never receding
what is a recessive gene
what I put it on with his black hair I just reminded myself a 17 year old has black hair and I didn’t look like that rubbing dirt on your face tattoo
Contours but really I was like how did Jesus know what’s going on very special show cuz it’s Jeff’s birthday. But we’re going to we’re going to give him the gift / passive-aggressive taunt of having a great show for his birthday back by popular demand I want to bring them up right away mr. Rob schraub
popular Batman people on the Reddit they liked you what did they say timing known each other a long time and I got time
has a really good mood tonight I think I know why the two hours of me apparently just suggesting pedophiles are great people I haven’t I haven’t listened to it a 5% of my point that I just said
I actually thought this is a really fascinating weird
sing is there was an actual and I’ve been so busy and I and I cuz I didn’t want to read a bunch of people saying like what’s your point is it do you love pedophiles but I did notice that there was actually a self-identified pedophile that that actually came forward and I’ll be at anonymously and said you know I don’t have any control over what I am and stuff like that
judge me one way or the other. However I would I would say that that my point that I was trying to make is that when we get here it’s it’s whatever I don’t want to think that I did not have a sense of humor
what is adamantium what was it I don’t remember now and then go ahead I’m sorry I didn’t have anything anyway. I printed up a bunch of posters of heartthrob from 1995 from when I was typing up a picture of like at eight year olds and over all of that comes every time I clean the house
cleaning up against brick walls of our relationship is like when it was first before I was going out with Erin when we were still platonic you would crash at my place a lot but then the nights that you would come over you would put on his mustache that I had Dick is like before I put a detail and really like having a mustache on a sexy woman so I was I was attracted to a mustachioed one when it wanted to keep an eye on
well I I know start like like like my housekeeper Sophia would like cupcake one morning came in and wake me up from from from the sofa as Aaron bolted up from elsewhere in the living room with his mustache on and it was 8:30 and like she does then sometimes Sophia would find the mustache just laying around and she would carefully put in the little drawer
where the drawer next to the Gino’s in the little box next to the bed because you’re home.
Our next guest is the president of Mexico
he’s a member of Mensa has been given a Nobel Prize recently for being a human being Santa Rob have either of you ever been to a baby shower baby shower invite men to listen to what was the drunk without even communicating we were like and communicate like this would be funny if we all got really like bellicose the next time someone gives diapers let’s just hit the Roof Run
just like that all the women wear like a little little are there any game is this leading to the game today to say Dad 40th birthday at the clock at exactly 9:11 I covered up the clock to take with a clock on the top
and I’m at
you know I made it home it was at 9:11 or do you throw it away
going to pick if you could really fast pick up Roxy if you’re going to be playing for because at 9:11 I have a car in front of me when you think it’s 9:11 the person who gets closest to the actual 911 your proxy will win a case
right in front of me and you totally game tomorrow night what time did you come with him
play the American version of Anatole and a pretty Cold War end
foxy and
if you can this really quick you guys at the same color scheme just so you guys can see
text me directly back property
I think you fellows sit down he was going to feel bad for obvious choice for The Price is Right, that price or Right Price is Right rules I hate games I hate games I hate games I’ve always hated games I hate him now more than ever and I hate games I hate Sports and games anything where there is a winner or loser I absolutely hate going on in the background
show my games cuz the person after the game or the war on terror I do not like it Terror you heard it here first television
how many days how many series can I smoke a whole alphabet
so a whole alphabet boy I hate James jaded that game too but it’s over with it’s a little too late I’m going to show up and it’s why I fucking hate games is because I always whether you’re playing werewolf or Scrabble or 911 game or whatever it’s all right I’m going to do it
locate the first one to get whatever it’s just like the first person to die and sit in the corner and watch everybody have a good time as me
all right well speaking of games I have a chainsaw
came over here together and I was outside
hey do you miss traveling with your besties like a girls trip do you miss going a huge family gathering Viking soul food do you miss meeting the parents so I can get out well actually, no limit is that but you can still do all of these things with me Desmond Thorne on my podcast adventures and blackston amount each week I take you on a journey through a new black film how it relates to the culture and some Gunpowder themes would like to my own life so there’s always a little tea and a slight bit of embarrassment and of course as a filmmaker it myself and one of the blackest Phil nerdiest film Earth-like ever you’re always in good hands
adventures in Blacksburg, but Desmond Thorne executive-produced by Amanda seales new episodes every Tuesday on all major podcast platforms
this episode of harmontown has brought to you by Fulton and Roark Jeff you’re sick of us bill in all your colognes all over the place you hate liquid colognes that correct it’s my Nemesis it’s the thing that gives me Nightmare dreams all night long I can’t remember how many times I’ve walked in on you just just covered in sticky wet cologne I have traveled and broken a bottle of the cologne that I wear and then my luggage smells like a French whorehouse for the rest of time before noon work is a men’s fragrance and grooming company that specializes in solid cologne shave and shower products all designed to make getting ready easier and more enjoyable when you say solid cologne do you mean like solid in the Jazz sense like wow that would bet Jazz solo was solid you know I do mean that but I also mean physically solid as well like a little loan the travels in a little small package that I can’t spill all over my luggage and smell like a Mexican house so friendly wax-based colognes that can go anywhere
nothing to break or spill it of course they’ll smell fantastic like a Mexican pit house
I mean there’s different levels of Mexican I mean there’s there’s there’s the high quality ones there’s the ones that you wish you didn’t go to write to does funtasticks close is one of their fragrances called Mexican 10 house was designed to exfoliate the skin with or without a washcloth also you don’t even have to touch it, sand desert in the night well that’s amazing that’s that’s literally unbelievable a magazine or shave cream the very best on the market today so yeah of course I knew that was why would you ask me who my asking this guy you go to this house it’s like an episode of Hoarders so many back issues of GQ magazine they’re right and I got to tell you my house is made out of bricks of cologne wax basic alone I hope ya ya try it yourself at Fulton work. Come and save 15% off your purchase by using the code Ferrall f e r a l at check out check out
for what you fucking bums. Mel and good
Fulton and Roark time to get your stink on off your bad stink up and get your good thing on Fulton and Roark not by men different Corporation by Fulton and Roark for a really long time tonight but even if we don’t do that at least when I get Spencer up here earlier than usual
and another and another thing welcome welcome Spencer
wait a minute what really quick off music now I was talking to get my playlist you can have a giant eye.
natural phenomenon waterfalls
yeah is that right is leaving at 11
cuz I actually I don’t think I will have a I have a because it is adjust game for the three of you to play OSHA. Is it like a five minute
90 minutes
if you don’t answer it like questions about Jeff
are you doing are you newly what game has a conversational gold mine before we go into this game
I like to think so I’m sorry whatever I mean
yeah I really how’s your how’s your job this dice. No I don’t know it’s the only thing I don’t like is that I feel like I’m worthless and then I don’t do my job right because a lot of my car out whenever you find yourself feeling like let’s go clean my car
this is the kind of dialogues that we need to have this is the kind of died like I need to not have because it makes me feel like an elitist prick telling someone to clean his car I need you I need you to go shit I got nothing to do
rappers in the back I should probably take care of my car gets really messy love me David Spencer
check out all the Baja Fresh peppers in the packets there’s like two shoe boxes bean bag you know psychology
it’s it’s about poop cuz it’s about hot snakes
is that what you call poop I just learned about something all the hot snakes today apparently it’s a shame I thought I thought I might be lactose intolerant and I brought up to my friend Noah and he’s like and I’m like what is what is like you must not be and I’m like
things in the diet
Christopher Nolan Nolan Nolan fabric stand up
no one is wearing a jean jacket
but is it all is aren’t all poop snakes and
hey man you haven’t seen mine and it’s like it’s kind of things like if you’ve been there you know I never condescended dude thanks for also the Canadian tuxedo
what is your what is your poop question I don’t know if I’m up here when I do it
I think he seems like he seems like a good young man seems like you’re rolling with a good crowd
really quick, is that your own term or is that a common expression Hot Side
from regional thing
okay okay I didn’t mind the actual content that has to do with scheduling
for as long as I can remember now and this is not something I’m complaining about it all I think this might be a superpower that I have
every time that I eat
I poop is good that’s great I know it’s not because that’s ridiculous but it always seems like that I have an English muffin and then I like a half hour later I don’t know what God do not a half hour later saying the obvious thing that everything you eat you poop out right because I’m always filled with food and then I die put one like wait like right now in my mouth and then it moves everything down and one food comes out your ear taste like sugar and salt or you telling me how my
personally so I was worried Vaughan
or I mean I I don’t I don’t really like talking about my bathroom business.
I mean before I have like a big things happening pooping before I show cuz I was getting nervous and then I would poop before a show and have a great so I’ve always wanted to do that cuz you know it’s just you synchronize it sounds it sounds like you honestly wanted to do that
I think I just wandered into some kind of perfect I just do want to screw it up whatever it is in the morning it sucks because I have to go pee in the morning to people but like I always have to go pee and then go poop but I only have to go poop like 50 minutes after I go pay it’s like in the morning when I try to sleep so I got to get up to go to the bathroom twice and that just kills any chance I have of getting back to sleep in the morning you know directing and I said you know is whether you need it or not you know that your crew thinks you’re working always go talk to your actors in and the most important take a shit before you leave the house in the morning because sitting on set is like the most disgusting
thing in the world it’s terrible so every morning before I go on at like I’ll force myself to take a she is like okay you’re going to you got to take a shit now for some reason super early and I forgot to check like I’m driving I’ll be panicking because if I cuz I I have a you know this I have a love-hate relationship with my ass about this paperwork on the show and if I go to number two I need to be clean the rest of the day so I’ll jump in the shower usually to clean it up
you can’t do that when you’re about as but yes I didn’t get all real quiet over here. I don’t understand why I’d like to be clean when you clean yourself in the shower and I thought this before and I’ve never had the gumption to ask you do you do you bend over like the Coppertone girl or like what one point I had that the snake
the hot like unhealthy which go back to the doctor when do the doctor and the doctor was like oh my God what the fuck did you do to your ass and I was like what are you doing about it
I’ll call you about it really is there something wrong
notice
I just threw this together you know 10 years old with a shower that was like a communal shower sold
by myself
I think your thank you for the Silver Surfer there any wears a Different Strokes episode when I was your age
what was Gordon jump from WKRP was the pedophile and he took Dudley and Arnold to the bathroom and they played Poseidon
Kurt Russell one or Jesus Christ you guys I mean all I wanted to do is play G & G
so you were telling the story is amazing
in the shower I was barely know
I saw the dreams I had to poop and I just don’t understand the physics of the dream I guess I’ll log on top of the dream snake
you were hoping for a bunch of baby snakes to come out at night but I pooped on the drinking and I finish my shower in like wouldn’t go away and I was like a couple hours later my mom and I are doing something we’re making dinner and she goes to the bathroom she comes back to defecate my mother was very pleased with our values are
are we would never would never
I’m sitting there fixing the television I’m doing something and I’m just listening to her go on and on about how our family is better than other families because this is where she was.
That was me I could prove very interesting you don’t reflex to that you don’t understand things like you don’t understand physics you know like how it goes in your mind another going or what I put my put my pants I just took my underwear I guess I wasn’t supposed to do it when I took my dirty underwear and I opened the window to my bedroom and I just threw him out
because I thought that outside was like the garbage
there’s a abusive of your pants I’m like no absolutely not
Florida Lottery
Tremors in a grimace
Alec Baldwin and I did not a God complex I’m God year later I was walking home from soccer practice and I have like accidentally peed my pants before
too old walking home from soccer practice walking with my neighbor and like I had to pee really badly and I had to pee so bad and I was like I’ll just let it go and I just peed all over my shoe
adjuster from her shoulder
what
I just emptied myself from the top of my spout to and a strong sweatshirt that looks like we’re having allowed allowed me to stay safe enough to not mention it but I peed all over my shirt that on the ground there’s a trail there’s a river by me and she was just like are you watching Saved by the Bell later or like What’s going at like just walking all over myself all right that’s a pretty strong family I mean I’m very impressed by the year being ten years old and having all of that pressure actually buy the path of least resistance there and also like actually having you knew you were going to really disappoint your mom by telling her that she was making an extra parent
you told me you wanted to tell her out of guilt which is really interesting it probably your dad’s a pastor that was a there’s a different Force there I know my parents like my mom would get back I wouldn’t move my would take to drive to get out the Bible I wouldn’t I wouldn’t it was a deal-breaker for me I no matter how fucking cold to Wright’s I had my alibi like I did she just like she had a stablished this concept that if you lie while your put your hand on the Bible you go to hell and go to hell but my mom show me articles about to make my mom sound like some kind of crazy character from Justified but I mean Chichi show me article she told me about articles spontaneous combustion have you ever heard of that as if the people just be walking down the street with his birth of the Flames why do you think that happens

cigarette in their hand and it basically like there’s a set of circumstances that causes the body to not to burst into flames it just take off my panties combustion because you don’t find the body until it’s like basically like storage mouldered for a month until when you when you find it it looks like this is it looks like someone that just must have exploded into flames cuz it’s because they spontaneously burst into flames without any you know fire month later that’s not what I meant and even though they never actually saw a person so obviously can’t buy what they what they would find is is like he’s half retarded carcasses that thick that when you look at the crime scene or whatever it is that you know it it it looks like spontaneous combustion occurred it wasn’t spontaneous it was a slow
a rendering of body fat over the course of a of a month with no friends or no support system in like a nerd waves times
you don’t have to attack my mom I peed my pants 2 years ago
this is another heroic story Back the Night
about like the suppression of like children like if you’re caught peeing in your pants like children are awful like the teachers are your pants in the mom what does Jack Nicholson do
you’re both of your pic that sounds kind of like an American The Beatles
they’re from school
I live in at Fox or you’re on the other side
Santa Monica or something like that and you’re leaving meeting you go can I go to the bathroom I’ll be fine and I’ll go to bed when I get home so I’m driving from over by driving down Olympic to get to to Los Feliz where I live there I go get I have to pee and it gets worse and worse and I’m like I’m doing the butt dance in the cargo goddamn in another red light and I didn’t like it started and I’m crossing I’m crossing my legs and I’m doing like the
rolling them up and down all the tricks in the glove box I getting a sponge I get to that place on Virgil where it’s like you know next to the Kentucky Fried Chicken or whatever and it one point I like go I could go to the Kentucky Fried Chicken in at this red light run out take a piss and come back but for some reason my brain thinking that there was like a toilet it started when I go crap and grab my crotch
and kind of cap it off everything else goes all the way up to my things up and I’m like okay well okay
garden hose and you turned on the water and the water is going up to the top swallowing at the house of mouse
but anyway anyway guys know when you do that it’s your beyond the point of no return because the minute you go like this yeah it’s everywhere and it was with the pants on so it’s like I’m this is I’m dead man walking right here yeah I can drive home with one hand but the minute I walked out of the car next to the fucking Armenian people that live next door to me cuz I’m looking at down there looking at me with their fat ugly retarded kids and just I’m just going to be like and I should have done this I should have said this is what you wanted
fireworks but I didn’t do them the satisfaction you know and I’m having like this this internal dialogue the entire way home and I my God I really screwed up this time really having a bad painful it really painful like I felt like I’m doing some damage this is really somebody is going to tell me you know you really shouldn’t have done that in the car and his kidneys explode imagine that you peed your pants
for some reason Wesley Snipes scene from Demolition Man
Rob peeing his pants
and I and I kind of like just said to the universe and I said you know something at the time I’m 39 years old I’m an adult I can do whatever the fuck I want and I want
and I pissed all over myself and I said it’s my car my pants my life and I drove home after half take that Obama running down I did after I Pissed My Pants put my headset on and I called Ryan Ridley and I go guess what I just did
and I told him the whole thing and he said so bad ass man
that’s that that’s what you get by Rose come in all sizes I learned that from Willow forest in there but I thought we were building too and it answered your question from before why did they get quiet this is our condition when people start talking about human to expect a dramatic Evolution to happen because it’s always darkest before the dawn today they know from storytelling in their bones are like there’s going to be some kind of Bloom of humanity by Triumph and let’s Dino’s here it’s hard to to rain
what time is it in not like walking into a boardroom and go and hey how you doing the would-be hire these guys are 7 years past not paying their pants for real ones
other than that they’re that young they’re like they’re like shit I got to work a glow stick
but you and I are in a new work Gandalf the White
like if I walked in and you know like
girl like you felt like a hero
you shouldn’t have you were monster are you
trailer piss behind dude
wear my shoes and my feet
okay
yeah I do but I can see the clock pass through the paper somehow that happened and I can see what time it is I forgot about the games I’m going to lose anyway this music for me to read one read comments that I got today in the community subreddit in response to me I don’t like it when people know it was okay you can play the music again a second this is a comment in response to me starting a thread where I express the emotion didn’t Express the emotions make me feel a lot better of a very good mood because I did this today I express the fact that when people blame season four on season 3 it makes me want to kill myself today I hate makes me want to barf a die and it died bums me out doesn’t mean stop doing it doesn’t mean you’re wrong doesn’t mean anything I just want to stay here
stumble into a Reddit thread with somebody you like eventually brings up and they often do you think about it what what’s this word c I mean I’m just saying if I don’t get it I want to read this one, but I got an addition to all the amazing things people say to me all the time online I have a great life I’m more than I deserve I’ve nothing to complain about. I’m not a martyr I I don’t I don’t have a bad life I I’m I’m I’m rich and satisfied and I do everything I want to do but I think this is just a funny thing to do to that that I received is a comment of it’s the other comments so
YouTube music
shut up you faget
so wrong
new show is a worthless go time it up
for you to think the audio for your Farrell audio you can sync the audio there for your podcast take the audio to that time track so the tracks of time I said the person that hates my guts
backstory fuck it all right
shut up you faget
your show is worthless and so are you if you weren’t a worthless piece of shit you could make good TV like Breaking Bad
but you’re worthless to just wait until this season lives up to nobody’s expectation
fails to please the network get scanned and you kill yourself
right over at sisters
oh okay okay
I think I’ll be using Mayfair I miss running
okay they’re definitely am a fair situation
commenters definition of his Pilot
Dungeons & Dragons welcome to the Y
what am I explained
articulated
I think it’s at 11 right now I’m stage finally Julie will you come to the stage really called
tell me while we’re waiting for the caves will you just list everything that you like
I like sugar I like words that you like
hey
yeah let’s talk about the bow cuz it’s right in my face
happy birthday
happy birthday to you
happy birthday to you too
there you go
by the way I hate the Happy Birthday song copyright like are we in trouble why isn’t it a copyrighted song you know what I do because I hate to have a birthday song because I have a theory nobody wants to sing it and nobody wants to hear it right
say that what do you want anything and you decide to educate nice birthday we sing Eddie Murphy
so we sang Eddie Murphy can we have the same song Same Song same song is that we’re all smiling
I mean
you got it yeah yeah you’re an artist you just manage the Happy Birthday song
do you like. It’s just one of these bulshit things that we fucking do and I know we’re cutting into Dungeons & Dragons 2nd I hate I hate the happy birthday song happy birthday song is one of your leg or whatever and they have their own like do you like that Eddie Murphy
let me ask you a question why he talks about when he was running it I like how you think
I didn’t say I wasn’t
Play Are You song I don’t like hearing it on my birthday I’m sitting there looking at me singing this funeral song bring ladies gun every time Japanese ginger we get 10% back you got it I think I was we were doing stand-up in Lost we would know we’re doing at the LA freeway I failed history too many times and I was playing like make tracks
because I was about to I was nervous cuz I was about to do stand up for the first time and I think the video game operated coin operated video game it was a third chair Pac-Man on a stick
I thought that was an Antiquated term for this next I hope I can figure this out better than my first impulse was to imagine 20 25 year old robbed like like touching like a some kind of cell phones back then I met hurdy-gurdies VHS cassette side phone if people walk up then have like like like like a gallon of water tied around their waists and you know where my Geiger counter over it after I that’s under dumb
how old we are because you remember growing up early 90s this is actually like somebody in a movie was a douche if they pulled out the car keys
remote control car lot that mean phone numbers for one number of hard because Rob got them for both of us because we just become producers at a TV pilot DNR phone numbers for 1/4
do you know star filters
stand up before I didn’t you were eighteen and I was 21 what was the point of you at that time I talked to her point of view is looking at me for her neuroses and not wanting to have children and Herman’s point of the year that time I only remember really titles of I know my clothes are was a rap about masturbation
phone number for a good eight minutes of Jeffrey Dahmer joke that we do when you have like a bit about like a Johnny Cartoon fucking Ed McMahon the but I’m going to ask a question yeah yeah yeah cuz I was I was turning the phone on and I was about to turn 92 and I know why was 2191 and
Fairview are, but you’re familiar with the other person what do people say is Club promoters to promote the other person each other at the time Nelly Furtado
play last with Maggie says things about freedom and it’s just like how do you how do you describe just how do you promote the other person will bring YouTube agreeable after go easy on them folks are just
play stand up and then like the guy who is like the MC of the planet isn’t easy to do better that was robbed
are there before and I can’t get a straight answer why did it how do you like your club promoter what are your three sentences are not trying to figure out a way for us to do it like in theory that’s why you do it you don’t do like hypothetically would have been eight you know a damned thing I guess I wanted to be grounded or emotionally driven do you want to do you mean do you mean like I think it would just be the literal to be grounded I want to know what kind of car
at the time it was presented as you don’t have to be defensive about it being defensive towards Spencer said that we were in different Generations
Yeah by 5 years
alright we’re getting bogged down and stuff
so sorry that I’m committing to Best Buy really like to know asking for like a performance-driven starting out so I don’t need to know that like it was your point of view at the time jokes about Jeffrey Dahmer which is really interesting I’m just curious how you would plug the other person if they were the hypothetical I said how do you plug the person I fell in love with Dan Zach before I fell in love with him because he would do what I liked was talking about pop culture and I was obsessed and still am was like pop culture club promoter what would you say
I don’t know I think it’s 9:11 again but not on the clock
is a Ruble in ports based on observation
Dan Harmon’s observational humor about oversized women in the elevator at College remember his impressive impressions of man having sex with Johnny Carson could you imagine the apps that are happening next tribe come see a guy who looks like a young version of Michael Stipe doing a pussy and Batman jokes
so there’s a there’s a impression of what if what if what if Tonto
from Lone Ranger and McCoy from Star Trek both ended up on a planet full of dead people and is Kemosabe Jim Tim Tim Tim dead then there’s a split screen and it’s just the two of us, and I like him.
kemosabe he’s crying cuz they missed the Lone Ranger and and Jim I forgot about this life is a party party
elevators are horrible horrible and I think the reason people are not everyone did Andrew Dice Clay’s acted because they were afraid to do it I did not understand, that was a terrible stand up and we Cheryl material Marketa Marketa left in the dorm and no I don’t because I’m embarrassed about it.
because I thought that was acceptable to say a few words in your stand-up act like just a word it’s the word in the elevator and I pressed one and there’s these fatse were better and take the stairs and I go okay I’ll get off 2 3 4 5 6 and 7 and take the stairs
okay I think it’s good for my acne that I was young enough that it was weird that I was there 18 and 17 I was born and he was 18 and I actually got him in trouble because the woman that I was dating was the girl that I was dating that was absolutely Lee dating
five other guys at the same time was she was a waitress at the bar and we were living together at a time when she was not having sex with everybody else in the world and I’m rolling over here you know
dance funny right yeah whatever
you know he’s only eighteen and he’s just he’s so much funnier than me I just don’t understand it he’s 18 I’ve been serving him drinks are about fat country tracks and I was worried because I was about to do my first stand up at open mic and somebody told Dad and and you said Hey brother don’t worry about it
and walked away and I are going to like you know it is going to be a secret that she was dating other people but everybody else’s was fucking now
eventually I did after I found out she was having sex with everyone yes
hahaha
how do you say crazy sociopath
evil person terrible big green world and I think we were always like there was that party to ComedySportz party wear like like like somebody was somebody took me aside and gave me the don’t get cocky speech impromptu of my 32 year-old man to say to an eighty-year-old hey watch yourself don’t get cocky you’re going to win the Wisconsin cheese kind of competition
has someone took me two sides of the pickle Pantry in them
told me not to get cocky and Raps like what the fuck I just got told by so-and-so not to get cocky conspiracy we’re not cocky they just don’t want us to get caught if you get cocky I’ll tell you I’ll know if I get cocky you tell me that until then let’s get fucking cocky Which Wich
damn you’re getting cocky
okay if you want to edit
oh really
like talking about your friendship
Dan performed Rob’s wedding married me finally after all these years of be wanting you to marry me you finally married me to my wife friendship assembly to look up to
I think that’s bulshit what I made it tonight

sorry I look like the shoulders are what are bothering you right I pissed I know it’s a podcast
alright I need some dragons
no it good yeah okay
last time our heroes it found themselves in a roomful of stone you want to meet everything Rumble for a while and everyone freaked out and climbed on top of the wall
lava poured out of the mouths of lions of the Lions covered the hot
this is the time you were in a fucking room lava showed up declined on some of the top of some statues and then you heard Admiral.
and then Robo breathy showed up and he was like I’m Robo brevity that’s what happened
we’re going to have to bring the light cuz I can’t see shit I didn’t bring my glasses sucks
yeah
all right I don’t want to I don’t want to derail the train
no that’s not let you know what happened okay I love it there now okay I think heroin is doing the heavy lifting
Carowinds doing the heavy lifting who’s that I don’t know if you’re busy you’re busy here
I’m glad you save that before my episode which of the following week is there a young lady or an old lady is that deserve to wear or would be healed by participating it by playing at the front row
what is your name young lady
what’s your name my friend why do you want this so bad
what is your name music
forever home
thank you video tan tights and then like I got hair extensions are going to really long and then my name is Leah thank you Leah all right
you wanted to come up here
all right how are you do you know a Gigi Gigi do you know what you’re looking at and I think there’s some screw-ups here is that okay now that’s good that’s good you’re good this is filled with things that no one understands your name is mulrain your sort of integrity
we are sometimes not very logical Mystic person you do have a box of crafts and tools all right I got to do to read this now look at what I’m doing my body not dammit
all right my birthday is next month don’t forget Dan
Amazon
well well well we do Wesley Snipes on my birthday
that’s actually a good idea
I like Eddie Murphy
all right
where are we I already told you where you are at school sitting on statues that are kind of islands in this lava is there a roof the roof as it happens can’t he’s not quite like a jungle gym of chains came crawling down your heads question in the middle of the room or are we off to the side of the room are we like like like 1/4 of the way that you’re here about a quarter into the room like
for me to go is there a point A and B in this you can kind of jump amongst like tangle of chains but that’s the only way that was the way in was a door and I covered a lot of bananas or oranges
that might be of value just chains on the walls hanging from the ceiling heat well I mean you don’t know his emotions I’m about to find out cuz they call me in this game the great communicator
Raffi
it’s me Sharpie of the of the famous 34
no I imagine you’re angry with us for destroying your brethren and then murdering you while Jeff
if I’m getting that right
it was a weird night and I think that’s how it ended, you seem less intimidating but we have been through a lot since then and we only ever
feel remorse when we talk about what happened that night
and we feel although we’re biased the tabs
you didn’t let me finish you okay if you’re going to be rude you’re going to start to put me in a social corner and I think we got to start pulling and yanking on everybody grab that even the women just as hard as we can we might open up a trap door that’s a sneak out everybody I got to do this for some reason somebody I don’t see any changing on your end of the line armor
are we doing over there Corky want to yank on a chain or you too awesome
illiterate
it’s a condition affecting millions of Americans
framed it as a special abilities or
you’ll notice there’s no handicap section on they like character sheets you have to put it somewhere yeah that is a horse in your soulmate
call Sonata.
Who is not here
nothing you’re just Tangled Up and bolted to the walls so it’s like doing nothing pretty much know I don’t jump down until Ava down to statues
how far is about 30 ft off ahead of you is kind of in the middle of them climbing ability to my head with my like a narwhal and I stabbed him in the face
text Jerry guy Jack just
try it out
NuvaRing
they didn’t learn how to read they were too busy like if you were like serious I know you don’t you’re illiterate it’s important it’s on there so I think
modern it would have special disabilities on it
it’s your show man this is the real real leaping into a rage you climb through these things and you get so crazy you don’t even know what you’re doing you’re just head-butting a guy with a dagger in your face
it doesn’t it doesn’t do any damage because that’s not how daggers should be used
if you were to use a dagger would be a lot less accurate with hitting something if it were instead tied to your head
because you know you’re used to using with your arms yeah but it’s it’s not it’s not a warrior technique it’s just it’s just flailing around it’s not as effective so I mean I rolled it can we do we get up in order to start to find a pilot that’s just Spencer and Erin driving
and her just asking questions about
Dungeons & Dragons what was your question how long is my ribbon rope
don’t try to tighten your body I’m not going to do that, people tied into their bodies all that’s really depends on how is it in the lava is rising up above you in this obtained
I’m not complaining about this cuz I like it but you seem angry tonight it’s cool inside of intimidation points by acting like a lunatic. This is the guy doesn’t know how to use the weapons I see on his you nobody fair enough he’s got a flaming sword
where am I
am I okay well I’ll go okay I’m going to start like shouting really loud in a high-pitched voice okay
over there
bigger fish love is getting larger right yeah we got to find a way out I say we give me the phone number to change one more try and commit to you in a little bit more and not think it’s a stupid idea that the attitude had a lot to do with it not working I saw a lot of eye-rolling while they were pulling and pulling on change you know
halflings have like halfling size backpacks unless it was in one of our backpacks on North Face backpacks
okay what what do I get another turn and I don’t care to do anything until you know my guys can I do you control the universe if you can you melt
all right here’s what I would like to do
so we can all stay friends by the end of this weekend. David just to keep things on track that is true under this fucking arachnid assholes back can I teleport onto his back and could definitely try
you can see the back of his head covered in metal plates
and put it in my pocket and I try to read something I can’t
what do you guys think of this drawing
what is my son rod do you second shift light
what has shed light on.
Yeah you will be technically you are he shoots chains and all you guys
everybody’s want to change alright Kumail gets hit
he’s not here when you feel it kind of grind it around inside your body you you have no problem saying OK Google you trying and Tangle
D train entangle but entangling doesn’t happen. Do you see the chains they start to like shake a little bit like they might move but then they don’t sorry sorry everybody just let me know when it’s my turn man you can go I don’t want to have to go to the bathroom
I’m just like saying we’ll just don’t be a hero tonight
I’m just saying my life and we’re going to live it
okay if it’s my turn again because Maureen and I traded backpacks and where I have a human backpack I Spit on the cloak of resistance around the backpack and I spoke to hold through the bottom and the size and I really think I don’t
Ever After High on You
with my flaming sword I rushed breath somebody who doesn’t know about the world i e someone who can’t use your fire sword thing it’s just that you were you’re already really close to him because you wanted to head but I’m so but I guess just just I use my flaming sword and before I stab them I look in his eyes and I said think about your most vulnerable time have you ever peed in your pants
have you ever pooped in your pants and maybe breath is like kind of things back and fast when I stabbed him between his eyes and drink his blood
so up saying those words and clinging to the chains you stabbed it with your flaming sword of introspection
but you missed apparently it’s pretty hard to to clean the chains while you’re you’re swiping with a sword I guess so he doesn’t
just so you know yeah
DVD special features
funny
fall away like a trapeze
like that for the podcast listeners they flailed tribunal you sort it happens. I thought you were trying to make him think of stuff cuz of your history
hi I just told you the last time I did not come to terms.
Shocking grasp on this mother fucker RX that mother fucker was weak Petty shocking grasp on a craftsman about it with your arms crackling with electrical electrical energy you grasped is necking surging volts of electricity charged into his body dealing catchphrase do it
Yadira Castro as I stood lightning you
2102 Rob
I was 21 I was so wrong I was so wrong I’m going to ask you a question on behalf of our guests aren’t covering I’m here all the time around you climb around me why don’t heat the chains
Play We rise again I was so that I can heat up metal but still in my esophagus no that’s wrong
how can I take my round pack if I go
Hitman I mean strength of 13
I’m going to try yanking him in
can you get a minute
you want to do this job pulling a man and I’m just a hurt and I mean this change in my stomach hurt I did but I like you like an extension cord kind of a thing with the chain you know what I’m talking about anybody club guys are getting a wire going to stop pulling me closer and then I’m going to do hello Post-it notes it on your mother
okay so do you know what I mean come on you can roll it and everything but that ruled it cool to not allow me to do nothing but she’s a paper to affect my pulling so I just I had grit my teeth and harder heavier than you so like just kind of like pulling yourself towards him like No Holds Barred Hulk Hogan what is why I missed that whole thing
see I pulled myself closer to him and were nose-to-nose in orbit around each other
all right good Mezcal in in are Ivanka tonight
Coco the horse yay
all right
thank you everyone for coming to harmontown tonight thanks for letting me try to be just you guys are wonderful and special things to Emily and Dustin Marshall and everyone here thank you Leah and Rob everybody
and I read all of your comments I read every comment I’ll find your comments I read every single comment ever online I read them all and I apologize about that I appreciate being able to hear your mat thanks everybody.

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