Episode: 96 – SWAN OF DURG-A-DURG


Episode: 96 – SWAN OF DURG-A-DURG


Following the 826LA charity event, Mayor Harmon is met by an agent of compromise when a psychologist takes the stage. Later, Erin McGathy attempts her first Dungeon Mastering in D&D!


Hello, computer is nerdmelt E-Town, California
was you please get those supplies going on the stage for their apartment Town Dan Harmon
thank you
thanks for coming out
why so many people why
set a record crowd I think I don’t know if we’ve ever maybe it’s just cuz there’s lighting back there or something it’s a big crowd they walk out of a $20 worth
how do we how do we make sure that happens we are we just fuck them line up on the right
all right still a couple things I just want to I mean we had our our charity event here today we had the 826 l a charity event
and as far as I understand it it’s a good charity
I’m told I’m assuming I’m not going to find out that it’s like a charity that goes to fund windowless white vans
from what I hear it sounds like exactly my kind of Charity cuz I’ve always said yes there’s four people with horrible diseases battling them all the time there’s a there’s a million billion trillion zillion ways to try in vain to spread your money if you have a penny to spare around the planet to try to make the planet a better place try to break the cycle of Agony however in my tiny little bubble of existence I have always been asked this question why are you writing staff always a bunch of white from Harvard and the answer is always do that why is that big pile of scripts from from Harvard answer is because those people have support systems those people are willing and able to spend 15 years pursuing the app
amazing field of writing while their parents support them to think because their parents told them it’s possible for you to be a writer etcetera etcetera 6th grade did anyone ever come to you today would ever come to your public school until you you could be a writer you can do something creative you were allowed while you’re thinking of being a princess while you’re thinking of being an astronaut have you ever considered the possibility that writer is an occupation and that that doesn’t happen now I don’t think that if you tell 6th graders that are the world over that they should be writers that they’re going to have then wander into a world where they’re totally supported but I do think that not enough of them are being told that there’s not enough grade school era of your up right thing that’s what they’re doing there like like injecting themselves into that part of the genome and and trying to
do I exchange something they’re saying to 11 year old kids like write something create something today for them and hopefully that’ll go to something good but look him up Google it cuz we have people here from it and I wanted to ask them personally if I’m right about that come up and say no that’s not truly yet we’ve been working on biofuel you got it all wrong like the first teacher or somebody that supported your writing as a kid or are you a are you a brain as a child I did because I grew up in the 70s in Milwaukee and expressed an interest in reading and writing there was somebody whether it was my mom or someone some well-meaning teacher there was somebody that said Ho Lee fuk
they always responded that way it doesn’t happen for everybody and it may very well be as far as I know that may be why I ended up
being halfway decent when I do it maybe just hypnosis but that’s a story for harmontown about you being like you were separated and yeah in the seventies it was still okay till I grabbed his that that showed an interest in stuff I knew Yankton of General pop and you threw him into a closet and you said okay and how smart are you show us and they still did that with me back then they cranked up and then and I was like there’s a Sinister side as a humanitarian side but the bottom line is like kids you can’t Farm them it doesn’t work
you get you have to like lately every single tiny little human brain is a the whole thing that’s for sale with the human species is diversity the idea that every little Cranium contains not another kernel of popcorn but in fact a potential Picasso and it doesn’t that doesn’t make it shameful if the thing that pops is a delightful garbage man that that’s not shameful what shameful is treating them all the same that’s what shameful have to regard every free Picasso brain as if it might be the Picasso to Dan are you pro-life
then it gets more complicated hey do you miss traveling with your besties like a girls trip do you miss going a huge family gathering if I can soul food do you miss meeting the parents so I can get out well actually now I’m into that but you can still do all of these things with me Desmond Thorne on my podcast adventures and black Cinema each week I take you on a journey through a new black film how it relates to the culture and sometimes have the themes relate to my own life so it’s always a little tea and a slight bit of embarrassment and of course as a filmmaker it myself and one of the blackest Phil nerdiest film nerds like ever you’re always in good hands
adventures in Blacksburg, but Desmond Thorne executive-produced by Amanda seales new episodes every Tuesday on all major podcast platforms
I I I I I roll into the stuff early because we went it was so why don’t we let’s let’s let’s listen to bring up Tyler where’s Tyler see the front row there you are are you willing to come pick up Tyler
grab it grab a mic and have a seat
did I get what what do they get wrong when I get Tyler is what if you were there the beginning of 86 what became 826 Lau were there in San Francisco so old now thinking about it because I’ve had to think about it years ago right around now I was the first one of the first students at 8:26 once yet normal I don’t know why I should get a clean up but does that mean you were the beneficiaries of a two Sexes existence so you were one of the founding members of the chair that you were one of the first kids that benefited from this started by Dave Eggers at a San Francisco he’s the author Walter prize finalist for a heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius who wrote the script for Where the Wild Things Are the movie done work with Spike Jones many things like that
the book Where the Wild Things Are he started a much better charity
smart pure Lexmark 11937
Earth the higher and higher number by find it online that’s cheap around the world listens is right now when I do listen to in the future that a t 26 is not just a lie is not to San Francisco it is eight cities in the US they are always looking for volunteers just for a 2012-2013 year they serve 34,000 students they had over four thousand volunteers Nationwide but they are always looking for more so it’s not just your money that they would always love your money and if you ever want to spend that store across the nation has their own niche market that they like to sell things to sew here if you happen to be a time traveler their storefront is for Time Travelers Championship is a pirate supply store I believe Chicago is a robot supply store in New York is for superheroes
at the root of it is tutoring like it’s it is creative writing in tutoring so just thinking man’s voice Center what do you know try to keep him on a gags there was like what were those things called the like YMCAs or boys club club is a kid under what circumstances but I do know is that I thought I was to connect for a champion.
play rugby with a Kinect for like 2 things I’m great at
Connect Four
I will challenge anybody to connect four or Boggle I will get you I will beat you at Bako but I will I will tell you right now I’m terrible at foosball and ping pong
you’re terrible at bragging
I have begun to brag a little juice
counter 8 to 6 like you were where I was in the East Bay and I read Dave’s book and it it did quite a lot for me in terms of his honesty and what I would have been so amazing. Today is that to my favorite things came together in that I think you and Dave actually share the same as mentality of your honesty better than him of course okay all right and I just signed up for a class online and I took a summer course with them for I think 12 weeks and experience stayed in contact and it’s helped me for the last second so so since the last decade and in thousands of students
Reading Writing tutoring some famous celebrities helped out kids that they don’t need to know they’re not paid to do so Spike Jones helps out a lot and then many many people in the writing a kid like my biggest dream is like to do something that I felt like I could you know I want to feel good about myself and yet I don’t want to talk to people I don’t want to go near people I helped a kid
no not really I got I got in a physical sickness that kids like I need help I want to I want to I I I will you help a kid I don’t want to do is help a kid that would be me at 11:12 like the kid that would be me would be like fuck you piece of shit like why am I I want to go play with my Commodore 64 at home and I’m sure that’s not still a problem know I’m sure they’ve grown beyond that I we’ve stopped the Commodore 64 problem example kid that you would want to help if I can if you can imagine the kind of kid that you would think
telling me what to do I I grew up like hating adult not wanting anyone to tell me what to do I needed somebody to valued very much my parents when they telling me my mom was unconditionally supportive of me creatively like if I if I did anything my mom was like holy shit that’s amazing that you’re doing that I don’t think I don’t think that’s something a lot of people have told me what to do like fuck you like karate chop like like every mental karate chop ever anyway so what would it have you since you were you were a beneficiary of this have you become a benefactor of it aside from the fact that you came to the sale today and spend Untold Millions you’re welcome to have you become active in the in the
and even now I don’t live nearby you went to rush I didn’t even know you were dating if you don’t know what to do I mean the thing that I can understand it it’s a very big ol children oh yeah I mean the thing that actually inspired me the most is that on the walls at least in a 26 in San Francisco writers would donate their first second and third eye versions of scripts or book anybody famous names like Coppola on his script and he would just acts out huge portions of it and are supposed to instill and kids inside the other even some of these luminaries do not get a right you are always working that matter what you know and I never met any people you can just walk up and see someone’s name that you knew and you realize that it’s not always
right the first time I would love to can’t a kids don’t like me I don’t like like some kids like you really touch and go with me like I was like when she was a little larvae like toddler
loved it
and now she’s like 15 or something cuz just got the cell phone and she’s is rolling your eyes and I can’t even do you know actually kinda W active like I I why is it kid Martin is a kid more or less frightening than adult all right financially I like I own all of them
most kids don’t have a filter the girl that turns into a blueberry she’s still got something over me because she does understand Finance yet
we haven’t figured that one out yet
what does Deborah have skipped being good football and went right to owning things other people for that matter but our children more frightening than adult children
except in the most horrible sense that guy that guy
but I mean like teenagers are for good reason we send them to war and we worship them and we might wait wait we are looking to them and they don’t know anything like they’re like this monolith of energy cut everything comes off of them celebrate that day when the fucking Beatles played on Ed Sullivan or whatever that’s there be bigger than the moon but you see if some yahoo Landing in the Moon
how many times
where is company read the book he goes to the Moon by the way
no because it doesn’t it’s not interesting to me but there’s never a fuck
and in the book for a ghost like down syndrome like like like it’s pretty clear that he is like really low nineties IQ like he’s he’s like Hitler
I don’t know what I don’t know what the politically correct term is
thank you to all of the interesting shit he throws his medal the Congressional Medal of the thing in the book friend since he takes his purple heart and he throws it on the steps of the Capitol building and he hits a senator in the head
I don’t know yes I did we threw it the one reading I just bring them when I can.
I read Forrest Gump he goes to the space in the book I don’t want I don’t want to
what is garbage corn syrup and fucking tried everything and we’re telling us to follow in their footsteps but they’re really really talk to you yeah yeah
you hate teenagers yeah we were trying to help the kids.
Are are
teenagers in spite of not being old enough to go to war not being old enough to drink not being old enough to drive a car are somehow the center of our of capitalism that is a baby boomer invention because they were sentient and we are living in the shadow of that fucking quote willow tree and that results in all of us going on YouTube 48 year old people telling Miley Cyrus that she’s a slot in the comment section what would let her be a slutt what the fuck did she do wrong she’s a fucking teenager teenager either
no no
he’s a fucking child I don’t know
how to prove
tell him you did. You didn’t jerk range of a go-kart
everything you see him doing he’s staying to America why did why did I get more than a go-kart
go to charge $800,000 why do why does it go so fast why did they kill people for my pop rocks you think you don’t have a fucking religion you are garbage or capitalism you have a fucking stud Bedrock of money in God we trust in God and filled with dollar sign even though he’s not answering it
none of you.
Billion dollars
June 19th
I think I think you buried the lead on that work including me
egregious weird that behavior that we engage in 48 year-old housewives with a patch on their shoulders doing on their laptop
did you win
are you retarded
is the Tipping Point for your
because I
what I’m doing is I’m sitting in and out points on a fucking Canadian teenagers deposition so that she can make $80 from TMZ giving them clips of this kid really fucking out of her mind if you were a caveman how would you react to that how would you react to a try if you came over the hill and found them engagement Behavior
you eat something you would take their water if you would take everything they had and you would never look back you take their gave you take their animals you take everything and you would never look that ever erase their kvar
I just want to feel bad you feel like cleaning meaning
idiots there a strain of our DNA that’s fucked up
you got a fucking respect your elders and and love your children and further the species anyways so
it’s true it’s for the kids
we have 40 years left I just read this on the internet will say this conflict of interest with NASA
they sound like the population of the planet
so I will say that however we did give them nothing to do other than that I think of other shed its tidal waves and pickles are getting bigger
I would say either these are turning into potatoes out of Rick and Morty
bad guy
nailed it in my dream so big until my kids are big are Aaron’s Aaron’s Rifts area
will bring her out soon twenty-eight-year-old harmontown fan it’s listening in let’s say Seattle let’s say because there’s a cell a tag on a 2-6 la we’re doing things locally what what what what what do they do I’ll tell you know anyone can go to 826 National. Org fizzy to 6826 National. Org and that website will tell you everything can do for any city in the US that has an e26 and they can volunteer their time they can tutor kids ages 6 to 18 they can help with field trips they can literally sit down and read a book with someone only things you don’t want to do
they bring kids into these field trips into these local centers and the kids get to write a book and they leave that day with a bound book that they wrote which is I think I don’t think you can just miss the power of that I do a kid making from 6 to 18 is her know I will I will do it I’m going to do it
because I would say I don’t care what which age group you pick or what can you get I would say that it will be it will impact you in a good way I guess I’ll do I’ll do I’ll do whatever I can for I need I need to be like yeah I don’t know like yes I have that part of my soul that’s been decaying it’s obviously like we’re a limit supposed to be growing and reaching out to your old girl who dances
who are on site doesn’t like the cut of your jib
that sounds amazing
is it beneficiary of that organization and then he came today and he he bought a lot of shit to benefit that charity which may put people out there like what what are you like some kind of insect eyes
Egypt Egypt train people to are you like Scientology swag today how much money do you say the charity there was we had a nice garage sale today or at least fifty cents for the tootsie DVD in town and there was I was I was walking around with a sign around my neck that’s a shot with Dan Harmon and soon so these people took me up on my Alex
we raised we raised to be raised quite a bit it was good it was a good day for them and and America and God and Hostess Twinkies okay
so while I was while I was sick while I was at this event today this garage sale
I don’t I don’t usually pay attention to this stuff but I walked around the room and I saw a thing on the table I was like it’s funny that that Aaron’s got a book about Sinbad’s advice on comedy
that was like the comedy Bible advice from it’s a Jerry Seinfeld Paul Reiser George Carlin George Wallace
comedy insights, cover it just like those two column with two people and I swear to God every single person on that list is you can you can leave let it go and then just like right in the middle of an episode of Sinbad
Sinbad feel like a contest winner like after all this time I don’t remember which way it was going to be like in bed yet and I sat there in the chair and I started to engineer this Instagram / tweet I was about to fire off and this wave came over me that we all call Deja Vu which I wanted to talk about a little bit
because I suddenly had this incredible sense sometimes you get deja vu or your kind of standing in the kitchen I could swear I had this conversation before I get deja vu a lot I was still with like like little ones or you like it feel like I’ve been in the kitchen talking to the hipster
the fact that the government’s bullshit like I like how do you know that that didn’t happen already emailing you been hiding for two weeks like I did happen to everything was so freaky thing the concept of deja vu I don’t I am not I’m not a spiritual I’m a spiritual person I didn’t like some kind of relationship with the unknown I choose to personify the unknown I choose to have a relationship with the things I don’t understand otherwise I’m going to go into a McDonald’s but that’s something I choose
that has that has nothing to do with evidence I’m not I’m not Fox Mulder I choose precisely the opposite way that this particular episode of the podcast as evidence when you do kill people go ahead I’ll be dead I mean
when I tell you I love you I’m going to do it a way to take me out to the
thank you
so bad for you then that my predecessor is weird signature expect us to too soon to close to borrow
do something I got to do everything and he’s wearing a Christmas wreath on his head
I guess you can see me I don’t know like I said if he’s dressed as A Midsummer Night’s Dream for some reason
mainstreaming in Dead Poet Society
can you fly
kurtwood Smith
Deja Vu I was going to drink a cup and to God okay
I was told I was filled with the Sensation that if I had clicked stand or tweet or whatever the button says ok Google get you you gacha
GoPro whatever it says I don’t know why
you guys are Samsung you got the Samsung I was absolutely convinced that if I did it I was going to die and I didn’t do it. I was I was actually that convinced that I was living in some weird Nexus of time and space that a part of my memory of sitting there and it was looking this way and it was looking at an image look like a bunch of weird shit out of table that was like a garage sale thing and I was looking at like a tweet that I was about to click Send on and I had this sudden since I had this memory of a dream that I had when I was a kid
of that image
which I didn’t understand at the time because obviously there was no this space didn’t exist so I was remembering
a memory that I remembered having when I was younger of this same space but I also remembered not understanding what any of it meant but I also remembered that I was about to click Send on something on this device in my hand which I put in my memory didn’t make any sense because it didn’t exist in my childhood but that when I click Send I was going to die so I didn’t send so the question is is public
God which would explain his presence on the cover of that book for a long time and date it was the one on for a long long time and try to look into it and I’ve heard it explained that it’s an iron deficiency it’s a it’s a spinach and spinach the reason why Popeyes finish the reason why people think spending to the iron like heavy it was a typo that there was a
before that they typed up how many like how much iron spinach heaven and there was a typo. The decimal point and it made it seem like nothing but that we got lots of press and that’s why I said pop I had 8 oz of spinach

it was explained to me that that Deja Vu I’ve been here and I can predict the future but I think a guy walk in with your glasses are firing twice it’s as if it isn’t the first time and the first time it happens it’s been stored as subconscious memory which doesn’t have a date stamp on your subconscious mind that has no date damage it does is weird like grab bag of stuff that it could be it feels like a dream a childhood memory it happened a split second before is
but your mom’s rubber stamp collection tell me more about this
my mom collect snowflake for Christmas she’s got
we on that one that has a rubber stamp collection reality is based on do this happening then this happened but we in those fleeting moments we can feel like something happened an indeterminate time ago and it’s huge somebody here we go again
if you killed somebody and then someone came up behind you in the head with shovel
and then you woke up in a hospital bed and no one somehow the person you killed tumbledown a ditch and fell into a tarp it didn’t have family and I don’t care
and they were a babysitter that you got on Craigslist and you looked into a no no one knew she was at your house that night and you’re in the lower Bay Area is a bit on the side
theoretically you at the same time like like your friend comes up behind you and goes like
what are you doing you’re missing the party and they’ve got such a static charge on strike for the purposes of an existential
a tree falls in the forest and no one is there to hear it I’m saying one of these lips
is it okay if the song Forrest Gump see you at the hospital you don’t remember this person who fell into a tar pit no one that you got that you killed you never remember that you did it why because a guy has your brains not working cuz you cuz of the static static
do I have to be such a fucking sci-fi wizard that I could construct like a device that helmet that comes over your head I don’t remember if you’re not remembering that person so you don’t remember yourself do you wake up in a world where you killed this person
but you don’t remember that you did it and no one ever knows that you did it she just walking around the water cooler like hey Gladys
how about those Packers don’t don’t go there and you like getting mad to you and then getting mad about like someone would go Billiards or whatever the office I don’t be mad I’m mad I have no idea what’s going on
interested this is The Human Condition if you don’t remember where this guy is going to take her day shoes at Famous crazy doctor from Harvard Harvard from Meetup name world all of her up I need to wash the tip of your toes and she’s hyper graphic and she writes down everything she thinks about I read about her and I met her and I said something about a story and she wrote it down on her arm and I said will you pull up your sleeve
really cheap and she had a writing all of her arm and she is hyper graphic itinerary she has crayons and she can write in the shower or shower and replace has been writing feelings in her in her house a bunch of a bulletin boards hung like next to each other like Post-it notes on it to create more surface area she’s hyper graphic and he is a walking CAT scan and she can walk into a room full of people and you can see I’ve been going all the people and did you ever go scuba diving
what yeah okay you have temp temperature in Brussels is that you touch a certain kind of coral and that she just read people’s minds and stuff like that and I did once I do that she overheard me I was until you find somebody else had you just peed just pictures off thank God I walked away
what do with that you can email her ever since
TV show that never aired for a CBS coming in about another crazy talk of a tease for real and she’s like wonderfully brilliant there was an actor in the end of seeing right I find a neurologist and an actor was brought in on a on a gurney and he had the brainstem herniation he is based on a real thing at church day of electrified fence and it had a pacemaker and get him a brain stem herniation whatever that is and so she was there with a bunch of other people. They all got it in the hospital room in a hospital where they shoot like Grey’s Anatomy and is it really good like you know like maybe like late fifties or early sixties after laying on a gurney and what would happen on your back and your back of the Arts
and your toes will be pointed Arch and Point of together and your teeth to be graded and you’d be screaming gibberish and try that
neurologist we’re not like therapist or work like your brain is so fascinating to Jeff when you talk when you wake up in the morning but everything to do with your hands she can explain your whole life is really weird and then there was a point when you go into a certain kind of like severe like seizure can happen if your back and go all the way up and your eyes will go straight down before we could even see your irises we could be white with your eyes looking straight as you can cuz I’m in the same his eyes go straight down like you can still see half of the virus
I do not expect look all the way down here I can’t even do it. Trying to do it I can’t do it you can’t look any further down that I’m looking down as far as I can see even weirder
when you were like really little maybe like four or five or six years old somebody fell and you were looking down and it but you don’t want to look down anymore what would you remember that Andy guy cuz I have no idea what you took
is it for real for real
are actual medical like you’re doing it right in a hospital setting and everybody goes silent because everybody what is a parrot on the back of my neck stood at the brain is if you touch it it feels like toothpaste it’s just weird massive poop in our heads and will never understand it but she can walk and rim and go like you went scuba diving works
are we need a bad pilot what are you saying you’re the worst neurologist in the world you are not doing it right I think we’re bad with people we only want to solve the puzzle of the human brain and not good with human interaction but you guys you come into His being and you touch the other actor who’s going to this thing you walk in and you put your hand on the shoulder you smile and we know that you can reverse-engineer Happiness by smile you guys can tell me about like razor cheeks up and I actually cratejoy reverse engineer happiness through faking smile so we know that but we’re bad at so she read an article about how actor
taught her to be a better neurologist and so it was a picture of me in the Harvard medical journal
all right
put spring on my betrothed Erin mcgathy
I wanted to bring you up because I feel like you helped out a little bit and today is Charity I was the reason why everything didn’t happen today and now I’m getting absolutely the guy I wish I could show everybody a slideshow of all the times Aaron tried to make me lift a finger for any of this and I reminded her of the deal we had from the get-go which was you do whatever you want I will show up on Sunday if at any point you ask me to do anything I am who I am I’m going to yell at you and be mean to you and I held that
because I’m a hero
you work a lot. That your brain is complete mistaking the present for the past meaning that like there’s something that goes wrong in your brain and also before Caesars
Jeff with brain is just like a neurological misfire the idea that your brain can actually be like this happen before but it is kind of like it is a backfire like when you’re in when you’re most Muffler. It’s because like something’s happening with the Pistons your engine is going that’s the insane thing is that like our brains are designs to go down these railroad tracks that we are like
we take for granted has happened to slap slap slap slap slap slap slap but there’s absolutely no reason why a brain on a railroad track for instance just go backwards if for instance the entire track should go to decide to fold in half that has more power over the railroad then the people who built their little railroads like for instance the god that created the entire planet the entire showed it to me
I’ve never had a Deja Vu that wasn’t filled with an absolute like sense of dread I didn’t click Send after the deja vu was over I declined to click Send on a Sinbad bashing Instagram because I was so convinced that I had I had been about to click Send on this thing bad bad thing
that I was certain that when I clicked send I was going to die I just need to eat more Geritol
what was your friend’s name Alice Alice
I think your admiration of her is really beautiful I also have things hanging Everywhere by her description where you write a lot it if you are a bad writer and you write everywhere and you write on every surface they lock you up if you’re a good writer at your dusty Esky there’s people that have been hyper Graphics about the ages that they cannot stop writing and it’s a reason we have these giant tones by certain authors and she said the greatest thing I ever did was marry a publisher
but you made me sheet when she really does carry a certain kind of pen to write all the way up her wrists but also you she is like she was hospitalized for like stuff like that she kind of like melted down and they say you can’t like self-diagnose yourself we have to put you away for a while and I can do that but she was saying she wouldn’t sleep and she would build things that the Psychiatry psychology
because there’s a disease you can diagnose called being awesome
complex is it is a diagnosable thing you can go to a qualified doctor and you can tell them how you feel and they can tell you that you have a diagnosable thing called superiority complex for an inferior person
however you may need to dig deeper than that parasite is about as your name for what I have.
It’s okay we’re sitting here under light created by God that believed more isn’t there someone else that you could illuminate this room after after Sundown we we we understand the universe were living in because of a guy who didn’t believe unlike everyone else that the reason light seems to travel the same speed no matter what Point of Departure at has Isn’t because there’s some unseen Jello we all live in called The Ether it’s because equals mc squared
Buddha said like thinking that light is a variable getting you anywhere.
Weather in fact I know where can I go eat
therapist and I’m not saying that anyone that has a problem with therapy is going to be Einstein therapy you just hate change I don’t wait I love change change change everything all the time it’s like I can’t change enough
but he’s trying to change everything everyday I’m going to get the fuck ever
I ain’t catching that chip Batman I mean I got a positive things to change by yourself you just don’t like their offense because they’re not as smart as you think I don’t think it has anything to do with a hand shooting up and we like to respect us at harmontown what’s ways you can shoot him
hello there my name is Liz hello
Trinity Place I’ve been single for four years and he is much stronger than me and your little bit of Asperger’s and therapist to tell you that strongly about someone after find someone exact words are all intelligent person and you’ve been going to therapist that you feel you can send maybe hopefully he’s not listening or she do you feel like maybe they’re not meeting with this person so explain
how how that’s possible how you can go to a therapist that you think is dumber than you and how they can benefit you
eye drop prescription for $5 a month
we kept your drugs and you don’t need them
if you want diagnosis because he doesn’t believe in God knows he’s
add a million and five negative interest rate
we fight like everything works and I think Dan feels the same way I think that realizing that arbitrary things like anything that makes you feel better if the deciding vote share every time you see if she was going to remind you if humanity is important for you and I agree I think I think that the idea of therapy is founded by like there is no such thing as a revolutionary therapist there is no such thing as a person who sets up an office in a mini mall with a clipboard and to come in and sign their health insurance and can’t wait to tell that person
but when someone comes for you that’s true like it was your your happy for people to do their own thing right marriage
I guess people who are already happy with the way things are going here having like weird plan on it. I think that there’s ways we got it we got it we got it we got another coming up from the middle of the crowd
I don’t know why I hope I hope it’s not just okay I won’t say what I hope it’s not hello
I just want to say that I do go to therapy for a really long time and I started going and she’s amazing and not because she tells me things. And she’s a fucking awesome feminist and her right now tell her she’s wrong color her feelings are bad color her joyous wrong all right tell her she should buy a bottle of beer I drink plenty
I I just got a cat I went to a therapist was awesome
and he was he was way too expensive
like if I had my mental health would have cost me my home my everything I would have been under a bridge being like
get why this bridge has deserves to be over me I just fucking bailed because I got nervous because you was not covered by Blue Cross or Blue Shield or anyting and I just I just felt he was young Ian he he told me she’s probably extrapolate that therapist who’s actually so activated that yeah you didn’t feel like you were sitting in the strip mall with him he was an agent of compromise if I tell her I said hi feel she totally
booming out check for sense of self-worth as he was a union guy who told me on our first session she said go home and all Union stuff and I I’m in the Campbell and I got money now go back to him but I’m telling you I could be mentally unhealthy and driving around in a Tesla
are we going to wait for you and Joey can you pass the mic.
I’m a I’m a bring it to harmontown talking to a person but not the title therapist you like talking to a person and relaying things and actually having a conversation with someone you feel has the credentials to talk to you but the but the steripen the title therapists like to it gives them the right to take money from you in like all his stuff for like just talk like a person what are you I mean what are you saying that’s how I feel bad for your brain
school and it might make that what they learn at school is how many teeth people have they don’t take that fucking bite
but it’s so different, I’m glad this besides audience came here I’ve always been waiting to be called out on this I know I need to go back to therapy I know that I know that nobody needs therapy more than me
I am good you know
friends over my back at
how many chairs are there in a Bon Jovi concert tonight and I am very much respect but I do I respect everybody who sang like Ron and yet there is where am I where am I headed over here
are you willing to come out
accurate life leather weather looking at the healthy what are you are you are you okay have you ever been to the show do you know we never pick up people no one’s going to pick on your hair
okay you you said you got pushed up here but you’re okay being up here right okay all right what’s your name
I just got license w
I’m so excited about the show this is been a long time coming I really need to have my face rubbed in this section of the carpet I’ve been talking a lot of shit a long time about therapy
if I did it was a little tough.
Black Americans are professional helpers and like any doctor who don’t like the first one you find another one that you do like therapist and therapist that take advantage of people or are egotistical themselves but I went to school for a long time to learn techniques to help some of them you find a good connection with someone who’s going to be real with you and and lead you to be a better you there’s there’s there’s two things I just it just in the short time that you talk I would like to say that I’m sorry
the really hope that you get some money out of this when you when you go out I’ll give her a pile of it it doesn’t when you but went but when people go to study teeth in dental school they what they learned is that there’s a certain amount of teas that they exist in an ideal condition and the certain of row and things like that so the thing that scares me immediately is the idea of the human mind as an array of features that supposed to be arranged in a certain order that’s the first thing that scares guys in my profession I’m not I’m not unique in that way every hack writer in the world wants to hold on to his press on this and thinks that it’s going to be taken away 10 of those people fuck you you hack
stop using the fact that you said you did a rewrite on the patch with John Leguizamo as an excuse to be mean to your girlfriend go to therapy and give me an asshole but me that’s a different matter like I really like I got something to protect the doctor goes okay this is what a bone is supposed to do this is what a tooth is supposed to do this is delivered with the look like when you’re dealing with the human mind not the brain but the money the personality what do they teach you in
is 140 / character for the fact that some people actually are supposed to be a little bit crazy I think I think number one is we’ve had a lot of trouble even being seen as a sign and I’m a psychologist and a psychiatrist right here Todd ways to get you to function better what’s your definition of it not touch it I don’t want to cut you off
what’s your definition of it not functioning as it should somebody comes up to you I would hope if somebody same to you said you like I am like I’m having fights with my girlfriend I am going to marry her in November as a guy
he’s asking for a friend like I don’t know if I want to ask you a question but I guess we have all night do you have and what what what field do they come from what it what it Where where’s your office so how long you been doing this my new job veterans it’ll be
you must sell at a private practice in Studio City and we saw kids and teens with autism autism and ADHD and I saw just regular adults than they were at Kaiser for my internship or so give me everyone any Walk of Life psychosis to I’m just having trouble with my fiance if you could do what what is your definition of I don’t even want to say it unhealthy mind I want to say
I would say if the people around you are worried and there’s a consensus that you could be doing better that would be indication number one terrifying Donald Sutherland in Body Snatchers
it also be do you think you could be doing better I mean when someone comes into my office but what if what if I think I could be doing better if everyone else thinks I could be doing better and what if I don’t trust them then I start thinking about certain diagnosis and a couple hours talking to you about what’s really going on what are you worried about why are you concerned about coming to see me even though it’s always it’s always answer your question or not coming to see you
the last 11 times I’ve gone to a therapist it’s always been because it’s make-or-break with the I’m always on the verge of like I’m hurting somebody that I’m with
to turn into a bouquet of flowers
I just knew that if I think most people make the mistake of Last Resort
you’re not listening to what she’s really saying people do like preemptive you know marriage counseling or couples counseling too but that’s like right it’s like you should you should have dealt with this before but it was bleeding cool because I’m currently beaver
I mean I’m really I’m really happy with a relationship right now but we do have a few communication it would be nice to kind of work out a game plan or just kind of have it this isn’t one of the problems I will be coming to you as I have a fiance who tried to Parlay any situation in their political Advantage I feel like breakfast
can you tell me why can you take that money I Sarah I’m coming
behind the table
what’s your name Sir James Lively Jam is a lively fake name my name is most likely
my grandfather was a Hollywood red and white wine
why do you have a microphone in your hand right now
I came up here like that’s what I am
in a little bit interesting did you go back to your your your comment about diagnosing people diagnosing people have a superiority complex genius is going to take us all over right there like the technocratic like capitalistic like Geniuses but it was interesting about therapy is it’s like a bunch of people who decided that human compassion is actually more important that’s why they’re diagnosing things like
superiority complex that you did not get
Socrates you care enough to listen to like a rambling idiot like myself
you came up to support couples therapy
I misunderstand your
yeah I don’t know that there’s much of a thesis
can you send me back.
Change the white light therapy gratefully received
James Lively thank you very much
call James Lambert.
where is Spencer thank you
I have no idea what happened but thank you again would you consider seeing somebody like doctor Amber or somebody in her ilk I don’t know if her name is dr. Amber I would
don’t know what you’re nervous when I came home and went with Dr Amber I would be like
earlier earlier you said that.
Amber Amber don’t take sides
John Mayer side effects
going to sessions with dr. Amber let’s say Darren has a doctor doctor doctor
I thought that’s where his office is.

I wanted to actually I think that’s a weird name to give a person who’s valuable that I have for the last at least I have at least a year and a half on the profession of therapy in general and I I I don’t know I would like to hear out any prospective from that side like we never have anybody up here who has the guts to say okay I do that thing for a living and I’m not a piece of shit and I don’t I don’t cry on the ball and I’m not an agent of compromise I do just want people to feel good about themselves regardless of how crazy they are that’s the thing that I wanted to see him when I come over
remember how many how many times have you heard or have been to
I listen to
where I go is having her basically harmontown to nothing more than just a huge like Soliloquy of like what’s going on with him like is there any diagnosis that you would like us to mine ore
you don’t have cancer but I don’t have an answer for that there isn’t one that comes out really good
but also using a
a psychologist wasn’t diagnosed with Psychiatric association Owen Sound like real real and so if they come up with diagnosis more of you can qualify for this medication if you if I took insurance and you came to me and I wanted to be reimbursed for helping you and everything I would need to give you a diagnosis that it’s it’s a terrible sister cuz you need to actually come up with a label for a person who happens to just have a problem with the way the world is what a what a weird kind of like of Interest that’s not to say that you have wasted your life and your occupation or that you’re not a good person but I will say that means I’m fucking right thing that is fucking horseshit
capitalism in action if you have a problem with the way the world works you supposed to go to someone in the kiosk and they are beholding not to your condition not to your happiness and not even doesn’t happen isn’t anyone around you but does it happen if you’re fucking health care provider corporation definition of mental health there is no such thing as mental help just to find by a corporation a corporation to find normality as corporations being human beings corporations have any power over anybody that’s automatically insane you wake up in an insane world you wake up in a world of psychosis so by definition if you feel psychotic if you think rivers are red and the sky is purple you may possibly be saying you may be the only
same person in the world
the rainbow Skittles you can’t Taste the rainbow rainbow is it it’s not it’s not your fault but you are part of the Beehive and that’s why I don’t I don’t I don’t I don’t do it I won’t KC Royals last week at Dolly and Jesse Dolly and Jasmine
go to doctor in person I went to school not to learn what the diagnosis are but I went to school to learn how to help people who presented with a certain problem lots of psychologists lots of people are unhappy with the DSM if people know what that is the big book of mental illness there’s a huge controversy about it but I can still be a psychologist and throw some label and sending but still at the real issue if you have something you want to work and we work on that and I don’t think too much about something around on insurance form cash I’d say you’re just trouble with this talk dude bunch of fucking problems I would go bankrupt trying to set my mind straight for sure
did you eat that dude that was working on me was charging more than my rent a month
it was like I loved it but he was great but fucking whatever apparently being mentally healthy means you can’t live in this society which is what I thought walking in the door
that’s what makes me crazy
is tomorrow seems weird maybe it needs to keep screaming weird but I don’t know if you if you talkin to the fire hydrant everybody drive by like past their pockets as they walked by a sorry I can’t help you down from there it’s like I’m talking to a fire hydrant I have a job, those people are habsburgs it look like in the 17th century it is like a little balance in their head
I’m Shuffling off this Mortal coil I’m done with this planet
made it I fucking one
what I would I would like to do is look back on this Monopoly game from wherever beyond go is and go fuck you people what did you think was there was a part of the game it’s called jail how many hours do I have to do to be a good person because I want to have a I want have a kid I want to see kids I want to spend the rest of my life
I want to slowly crumble into a skeleton and like rumbling to die and leave a kid behind me but I called Parenthood yes you don’t want to leave a kid in front of a skeleton but it’s bad
I’m sorry you’re stranded up here or should we do do do any final words for your vocation or after Amber is there is there anything else
I feel like I have to give him some sort of message therapy is not for everyone but if you’re interested try if you until you find one that works if you heard people talk about it tonight and it is to find a connection with someone else in it if it’s not a therapist to your podcast is your therapy I think would you like a dentist get to say like okay this is where your molar should be in the front than something wrong in the dentist chair to another science with the mind but Amber is saying it’s obviously more nuanced than that however according to the insurance companies
that’s the problem so what I’m saying to Amber is in view of that than the fact that that that that’s how it is is your suggestion to people like that unlike a dentist with therapy we’re actually it’s been holding up on the consumer to actually explore as much as they would with a romantic relationship you have to actually see if you if you if you go to your first therapist and and your happy your your fucking up maybe and your teeth are Play Goo Goo set in order a order of six million years of evolution where is your brain is so all of you out there who are happy with your therapist you’re about as happy as people who married at a high school go fuc yourself
Pacquiao Pacquiao
enjoy your divorce
Stacy and Steve I remember
Amber’s I got to do I got to do to get out of here at 3
all right it’s fine you put a human face on it okay it’s finds a way
second therapist might have made you really mentally healthy like a level of it doesn’t take insurance so she’s not beholding to anyone should really pursue it don’t listen this is amazing I agree with that
okay now.
It’s not a competition I’m saying I don’t represent
for a long time I don’t believe in therapy and then I was so unhappy that I started going and it’s incredible I everyone should do it if you want to First surfaced therapist amazing first therapist right out of high school
what time 29 years old
not as much as your second therapist
I don’t know man how you say my husband is going to like me
crochet my first joke I would get a bigger last on the call back and says that
it is never fun. She’s really nice
I believe you do it I don’t I’m not I
I believe I believe you
that’s the point though I’m not cynical I’m not being an ass off that represents think of therapy I’m staying at Amber you agree that be because you’re being like and I don’t want to throw you under the bus but you’re saying in this world where you have to like that like like we should definitely all the Caribbean number one number two we should all be really picky all right all right let’s go to the zoo when she did a good job with the hero
thank you very much
I hope I didn’t embarrass you too much I thought choose all harmontown fans that come up on stage are fantastic. Quite nicely meeting with me standing up and be like oh my God my fucking therapist isn’t like some Jagged weird charcoal rock guy going
do you have to go to extra hands like a weird a weird microphone Party video bonus
weird pressure to blow up
no I I mean I mean there is are there their they’re passionate their passionate feeling from a podcast answer the question I don’t know why because you told me to say that I’m going to marry her when I go to the same relationship with the other one I’d like to go to a couples therapist
call Terry about the artist rejected your bed
the audience covid-19 it sounds like a siren view of failure when they hear it may I may I like to reveal
can I review a fan speed
yes we are
listen to me I haven’t spoken yet they’re going to become a rat once I’ve said I track
too much bro I was going to come and she made a really good point just now
does rubbing my face against them like a beaded curtains
we only have a few minutes left and
Spencer is not here but I have I have always fantasize I mean I go out wow it’s no secret that text
Foley walking up his heart behind you with polyhedral Falls
my IRA I’m not a celebrated excellent player of the Auntie but always fantasize about maybe just dungeon master in for a second
if I could just doesn’t like it just my own world I’ll give you guys characters just out of my head and we can just end just let me do it for a second.
For no reason she’s moving to another microphone happened last week really quick just character is a pillar head is Shania Twain
I want to check in with Doctor Amber after this is Jonathan
are you ready
last week on errands and Dragons
polar head and Shania Twain were traveling through a dark cave filled with as small boxes filled with presents
Shania Twain didn’t know what to do for her mother-in-law’s birthday
and tell her head it was was irritated by how much emphasis she was putting on her mother-in-law’s birthday
bags of blood
well not brought I catch up with Shania Twain and tell her head or will tell her head finally confessed killers
who knows what will happen this week
17th level Samurai
I take out my samurai sword which is has a plus 11 against nuts Ferrante the Goblins display he’s not he’s not in your visibility to see how you’re just looking for a present
hey I am in that sand I do a dazzling shopping spree
you find an appropriate hat
I found the appropriate at what time appropriate accoutrements really really granular detail
you look around the cave you see what looks like Harrison Ford in Star Wars what
you look beautiful can you see what it looks like a different gems trapped beneath a like a nice but the ice is not where he’s stuck in the thing can I train use your your ability to unfreeze Jim looking around for a second I just want to keep looking I thought that and I just keep looking at it really slowly Reynoldsburg
on the tongue
see what it look like hundreds of colored threads and they’re and they’re floating they’re moving they’re jumping up and down like they’re alive
are there is there is Magic there is like they’re like they’re snakes and they start hissing a nice I sent I sent motive
Daryl Hannah
I I I I I grab the swan by the neck
Swan’s neck starts to move around and comes alive
yes I already have the perfect hat but I think I could use maybe a nice accent like a brooch or something
I feel like you are being to do you know who I am
do cancers do I understand the answers now I don’t know who you are
I like I like over neck and I say is not repeater song
that’s the last time I will repeat my name as a rule I don’t repeat myself and I’ve made some exceptions there will be no more Jared Jared that repeat myself again
how do you say pie or a boy
you inflict to damage
he means no harm I always here to help you but now I’m here to Juicy’s u-turn
the swan of dirt dirt fits a poison egg and his court I’ve started
pillar head pillar head in the face in a flex
for damage
Ronald Reagan during I’m sorry we’re sorry we mistook you for something else we have we have traveled long and hard encountered many demons in Denizen you don’t want to meet my
we just we just want to hang out
okay with you we don’t want any trouble a lot of nice gifts to my bikanel I will not but we don’t we have no quarrel with you madam I swing my swag
I swing my swag bag of holding a bunch of CDs that were given to me. Kelly’s tendon nothing happened you got to work on that
I touched the swans waterfowl cheek
do you
for me
I really do snakes are you really looking I see a beam of light when I look at you
I see who you are I see your playlist but I see your favorite color I see all the things that your high school friends hated disappears falls to the ground and what you see in front of you is a beautiful young princess holding a pearl
in her hand she looks like Sigourney Weaver at at 12
thanks for thanks for qualifying.
You saved me
the desert visit difference
Melvin Swan lady years which is 18 in human years
I cast dr. Amber
Swan woman lady a terrible snake Swan for a very long time only providing gifts for people that wear she can guess their people that they didn’t care about very much
we are just here to fulfill our Quest and possibly if it behooves you buy you beer whatever you want human princess is five more minutes before my. So here’s my
we did it we won
engine Masters
James Lively
dr. Amber Kelly thank you
thank you guys


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