Episode 200: Simulation


Episode 200: Simulation


Harmontown turns 200 with Rob Schrab and Rob Corddry, some Harmontown regulars return including Adam Goldberg and Harmon lays down the greatest rap ever. Watch the video for free at harmontown.com/live! Thank you for all your support. This episode is …


Hollywood California
the 200 harmontown is now in session
bring up Spencer Crittenden everybody
can we bring her over to bring up Dan.
I forgot Dan Harmon the mayor and let me make that decision
what does summer mean in privacy
Pirates Cove
incredible though it took his 200 episodes to find out that you are a great Rock and roller on time now it should have been Jody White from from Manson and from what are the circle
a little slower lower baladi
I usually ask when friends make music for us for to be a little bit more driving let me see here
by Jonny polonsky good friends
we’re not going to work you just you just keep hold it like that music I didn’t put on there cuz I never used it but now I’m at the Sochi 2014 3
I mean really what we’re covering
is it a weirdo cuz it feels like you’re showing people things but you’re filming of like a game show host
that you have a look of utter distaste in your face right now
all right well so no will sing the 200th episode song later alright well let’s talk about
all right we’re going to stop Periscope down cuz you can watch us out at harmontown.com Life for free so
closest please don’t stop this it’s that’s it can’t we just
don’t listen to them
but now that they’re going to be typing and they know that you’re not going to be a listening
they’re all talking to each other they’re all seeing it right they are they all hate seeing each other scopes
I’ve never seen it before my life I’m so I’m kind of excited
hey Auntie how’s it going she doesn’t wear and tear in the front room
200 episode
it’ll be fine there
another tonight at the only time at 3 to watch the live stream of everybody in the world
you don’t try to dictate how people see stuff that’s why people have failed to monetize the internet you don’t understand it’s a trough if you love bacon go to the pig like dog jump, jump jump jump jump jump jump jump jump jump. Came out on Tuesday and
repeat is still there the whole time
what does it you’re not watching described as looking glass
he looks he looks a little angry
he looks like he might be in his mouth
you want to sleep Ibiza
again we’re making podcast history with all this visual gags
the only Road
won’t you come come up and I’ll come up and sit down then I guess
the people behind you paid $10
get another chair
feel a little embarrassed cuz it feels like Rob expected there would be more of a who plowed just from seeing him so that’s why he had to just start button thing what do I do I thought standing o for sure just came over and he was behind a pillar and most of the crowd
everything went exactly the way I wanted it exactly the way I wanted it to but it but it doesn’t matter because we’re all in a simulation as confirmed by Elon Musk hero to probably all of my listeners
he said that there’s a chance to run a simulation very very slim chance that we probably are in a thousands of simulation deep inside a simulation we’re probably one of the things a chess computer thinks it might do before it decides to make it’s a real move we’re probably not even though an actual fake artificial thing that’s going to happen it will probably a hypothetical algorithmic you like the exploration of a possibility you know deep blue whoever it was fast. He play
Hasbro you think of the computer as I can I’m going to go to the Motions of thinking about my next move should I just tell him I mean
I still got to go to work in the morning but it’s a simulated job I would rather think of myself as entering Oblivion having Taken part in some kind of artificial man-made lady made the universe there could be women working in computer science
how to say man woman versus man
I still have my charms
I’m at Casino Royale feminist
I’m a feminist and that I will let you walk run your tears down my washboard
as I emerged from The Saltwater ocean, tough on the ladies feminist
I told them I’m a cowboy literally because I’m not always just did the relationship sometimes I want to just want to fuck Bon Jovi Wanted Dead or Alive what did he do did he rob a bank in a steel horse I think that’s illegal now that that’s why I don’t think
we’re running on a steel horse I mean it was got him back to back then now those sentences it’s time to realise his head still hurts and he didn’t find me it’s like it’s like that kind of when you’re at the peak of your rock and roll neck back me up here like
I feel bad I feel bad we feel bad so so bad I totally right yeah I know we get it just saying like like like I don’t think people even care that I’m a human being that’s what he means is this next song was bad you know like like like I use the cool beans saying it’s like I don’t even know anymore I wouldn’t song Bon Jovi a couple times for some reason and when he came out on stage with a woman and her daughter and the woman was probably like I wouldn’t say maybe late forties and the daughter was you know 18 or 19 or whatever the woman is
somebody was told that’s that’s good so anyway I’m sucking them
find me and Sam I mean Bon Jovi Style
on a steel horse
a little bit older cuz they were both neither of them with Primetime Bon Jovi fan age but the daughter was there to see the band’s cuz she heard about him cuz I guess the eighties are coming back you know who are you people and and I was talking to Mom is like I don’t even know if she plays and she loves them when Bon Jovi came on stage she was like a young girl a ton of this concert it was just she screamed as much as anybody there that was amazing to watch like what whatever you like or don’t like about Bon Jovi’s music he’s got great blond hair and he’s got two buns
is she going to have a rock and roll Dan great hair buns
is in buns
if you would have hair in more bones that would be amazing because you could watch it at harmontown.com life and you’ve probably figured out how boring the Periscope we could be by now just there’s like five cameras on the other thing stop being so open files
okay she just resent that it knows how to work her societal perspective it sounded sexual this is why they went like he’s giving her the green light but you know what I meant. I meant in the like a David Bowie way which is never sexual
we’re we’re in a simulation I think that’s about it that’s all I have to do scientist make fun of like religious people for having ridiculous beliefs that better than oh there’s magic people all around and they get that back to life
well I mean
here is stimulation but there’s no fucking gnome
I didn’t really know we would have some Talking Tom’s in the backyard right
where is simulation we should be mad that we’re in a normal is Dragon list simulation we pick up we got stuck in a shit simulation only means that it’s closer to reality which means that we’re the simulation that may prove that it’s possible to simulate a reality from within a simulation we could be wicked wicked really butter our bread with this why we could get her we could be you like headed for the major simulation leagues make it make it bump us up to 2 to add to a thumb drive that they sell in there Best Buys in their weird alien world where women are equal say all right our next guest for our next guest was peeing while we were talking for like 5 minutes before I was supposed to bring them out now
I’m going to sit in a chair like a normal guest
trap you’re taking a big Liberty
you’re exercising a liberty over there I think I think Rob is such a director and so completely conniving and Machiavelli and I think he found a camera at here in our mix it he really lied like he knows he’s being hit by Spencer Cam and it needs a new sexy to shot at all times right now
should I wear this red plaid
either that or my default jacket that goes over my default shirt that’s like a default shirt kind of event Rob or 200 episode
yeah yes oh grab a microphone you want to me to be louder this is Norman Lear was here by 200 200 200 Joe it’s your two week and we’re always looking tuxedo on my 200 Shelf
hey I want to have one right because you view view host you guys host and you feed on me yes. Never get rid of me
anywhere I’m going to be right here right in the corner of your eye for the rest of your life
mocking you episodes you better I want to see your texts either.
come on dammit Dan then I want to apologize to you because in the weeks that I’ve been away your shows have been excellent thank you Norman fucking Lear was on the show and
I wanted to be here just to Wrangle I felt like my job if I was there would be Tarango Schreiber it would be so nice to feel like I was so nice in that one what are you talkin about I was like thank you good job thank you
and I was making you hand gesture
oh yeah woo yeah I’m you listen to good Rob
thank you question but just talked to ask me if I’m a loser
is it likely I asked himself how was your day and I think I overdid it with the Red Bull my my tongue is feeling very very sensitive right now and then
I think I think Jeff is trying to prove that something about the camera and the only one in the entire time
yeah I don’t I’m not here I get paid like a big back, right now I think you’re trying to sneak attack undermine my comp trolling of authorities can I come outside now. You did not I cannot stage left and we show our 200 episode you had to come out stage right and sit down at the opposite side of the stage is me and I feel like I know exactly what you’re doing okay I think this is real
if it if it if it’s a simulation
so so so I want to know I know that I said I asked a question you know our people watching me jerk-off is anyone watching me jerk off
and every morning when they come over to your house
I asked Cody that she said why would you when I’m I’m in there like they’re watching me for pleasure or even for just like oh look he’s drinking. But I feel like I feel like they might be watching me for like kind of like just like what look out dishonesty is whoever is watching us you might be like a like a splendid there like at this is a special like I’d like a guy because he exhibits a lot of very fascinating behavior of the Dunder Mifflin in front of me so by the way since it’s our 200th episode
I heard you robbed mr. go ahead and I I guess I guess maybe a few I don’t know you know hashtag any questions or questions that you have for harmontown of the 200th episode tweet tweet at Jeff Bryan Davis was Jeff is that your Twitter half Brian Day of Brian with a Y okay Brian Davis Brian with a Y and maybe hashtag hashtag hot Q’s Hatchi questions questions if there’s if there’s any good ones and things start to slow down at any point on this episode
hey I think anybody was a hashtag me too just to help out with the show
you can cash tag me if you want hashtag me
take me to the show is this become about how I hate him
who named Jeff Davis saw a good percentage of my followers love and hate me because of the TV show him frequently Fielding like sex hormones and death threats horrible okay well you know what I mean fucking win in a fight between
Rob’s Rob and Rob corddry hashtag hot to use
it’s not a good question it’s not going to do this to help the show it all okay now look at you man you got muscles doesn’t look like he’s eating right in the week so you know I’m here he’s a vegetarian now come on yeah you’re from Boston oh I’m from Boston but I do have that at
and smaller bostonians is all he eats ahead of time is it in the in the out in the storefront tonight and it’s our 200th episode and he’s been a big part of our mythology he’s, he’s gone he’s been around he’s like I mean I don’t know if it’s going to pick things up give us a new scapegoat that just drives things all the way into the ditch and bury us with our own shovel but if Adam Goldberg wanted to come up and pay a visit
oh no
all right for a while
what up 9 for the hike used to meet the Adam Adam Goldberg
perfect the Canada Barrel breech
how you been Adam good good good and pretty good good good and pretty good yeah I kind of kind of Trail after in their pockets how’s your spine that sounds rude but you haven’t see I finally stopped being on I’m actually producing a movie in Ireland which is yes delete the subject of the film is currently not able to talk about script development because her car was destroyed by an ex-boyfriend who blew it out do the IRA nonsense that’s my life that’s my life so in your short time in Ireland you’ve actually I’m not going over there yet until I don’t use somehow
really I thought that was because it’s coming from that have the snakes
Adam what do you think happens after we die man I guess I guess we reboots I don’t worry about what happens after we die because I know there was a lovely time in history before I was alive and I figure we’re just going to the other side of it I don’t think we’re in a matrix inside of a matrix inside of a matrix because that just took a really good movie and ended up with more theists stabbing people with a katana on top of a oil tanker so many unanswered questions if we’re in a simulation do you think people starting to say I think we’re in a simulation is a the goal of the simulation be a a a Corruption of the simulation that will have to be terminated with immediate whatever the opposite of the Big Bang is a big suck
did you with the concept of a simulation or is it just a byproduct of the simulation didn’t want people to know it was a simulation Rene descarte would have said I think therefore I exist and then died of a nosebleed for a second later why because he thought so if the only thing I can know about myself is that I exist because someone has to be able to say I exist and therefore God exists but he was doing pretty good for the time
that was him wasn’t he wasn’t not him
take us out of dirt Telltale
is there a Jean-Paul Sartre in the house
Adam Goldberg what color are your nipples ask somebody here on hot to then they still that’s a great question
what about that right there
no I mean like let us not let me look on our side we’re getting a lot of babies with like a dark red hair like a dark beige with like a dark red beige element sweat thing I mean I feel terrible about that and I sometimes they don’t have to be body doesn’t matter wherever you sweating sweating I’m sorry. I’m going to do it I do it to do an Instagram photo with my sweaty titties yesterday and I thought that I thought I heard the word body slam
your underwear was with your hand was our entire world
pictures of
did you did you do
this was a great escape from The Lord of 400 episodes hope for but those are my Mia.
do you want your distended lower guts to do to be sociable at Beetlejuice three times and now they’re very they’re quite comfortable there it’s almost like cheating on me I think I think we do you know always said that Civilization peaked at Desert because we were like okay so I’m eating and I’m not hungry and we definitely like it was all downhill from there but I think it still sounds like it will hold true but I’m starting to get real real panty light real technical real sad because it’s just like me when I’m working at work the other day I had to wear a dress
that’s my job sometimes and but it was a real hugger and there was five different pairs of underwear hanging my trailer to Tryon Woods address lines to lift and separate your bike huge huge and I’m headed to my stride on all of them until later because I don’t know anything about men’s underwear and there’s a whole world out there a wonderful world has Blake Blake pieces of fabric shaped like a fantastic we’re in Palm Springs in f of x x girlfriend Kate I didn’t have a bathing suit and we asked around what’s a good place to go to get my bathing suit I gave him to the place
the place is called gaymart America’s favorite game Superstar absolutely compendious after Isle road after row of complicated men’s underwear and guess what this feel good right now I’m just kind of boring Calvin Klein boxer briefs right now laundry day tomorrow I’m traveling tomorrow so all the good ones are in the back I hear you
how about you Adam Goldberg I just never been like all my underwears uncomfortable not since like I moved up from the tighty whities around like well this is really holding me back I feel like I bought one pair of enjoyment of all mine on Me on the underwear on your faves it’s the base Hedonism level of underwear but you can’t wear that you can’t wear that kind of blue Murray boxes ones cuz I’m going to go right at my neck glow on you
your funky Reigns
stag fuck you hate for you to Adam sorry I wasn’t yelling at you if you want it now we’re cooking good great show
Jeff will work out I was going to ask another question but someone just said right now Scott Sweeney ask Jeff Bryan Davis Dan will you make the ruffolo kissy-face hashtag with a little soldier hashtag what’s a Ruffalo kissy face
the secret is he.
I think I’ve never done it in a mirror but that’s exactly that’s the spot light seduction interested in it.
who makes the banners someone asks where does the hot Cheetos Banner go with the flow. We can we can show people’s tweets and answer him I could I could say look at this I took a picture of my dog today it’ll be great
Goldberg did you that I heard a rumor that you had some kind of quiz quiz I think this is if we have any super fans in the audience
all right yeah, he’s a Super Fan cordray raises his hand for the people get your your your wife and kids and you but you were like working with the time in in Bowling out country. But your wife and kids in there for sometimes you were living next door to me without end and end at one point you were trying to get on Wi-Fi at an Airbnb which will you do it like French rapper you rent your reference French rappers living next to you at an Airbnb it’s in one episode on so I was I was at this Airbnb and it was right near my house cuz we live very close to each other and and I was trying to get the Wi-Fi and I didn’t get it for my wife and I looked at it said my Harman Carmen Wi-Fi
I was like I got to change my password and I was going to text you and say what’s your password
the story is you remember the episode there’s a great 200th episode by the way you got your neighbor’s up here to talk about the trees that’s a good episode
what countries were they what country is kind of trees is there was this whole fig it was my favorite episode where you you this would you read your tweets with this your neighbor on this stage of the best about the with the eucalyptus trees and when I saw Harmon Wi-Fi
I like I looked out the window front window and there’s one eucalyptus tree splitting
between my Airbnb and Dan’s what I know now is dead I was like that’s the fucking tree that damn won’t cut down and then forgotten about since they made that’s framed that I wanted to give to Beth because it’s an embroidered kind of like plaque and I like bless this mess style kind of thing but it says in a weird way bet that tree can totally suck my dick
and it’s like very very nicely done and I was going to give it to her to hang on her wall
I don’t know why those two that why she wasn’t like a regular on the show you should have had her back every week maybe. Maybe people aren’t as interesting after their first appearance even if they come back literally dozens of times.
that’s a milestone for guess I thought he was trying to find a loophole to forgive me for giving himself so if you get it right that’s doesn’t matter around here we can right now what time. Nobody’s home or not quiz which is having fun it’s the episode
mean and quite friendly and also I want to punch up so many of their jokes Rob this is probably the best question go ahead trivia question for two points what was the question for for one point I can say I’ll give you the question you give me the answer man oh man I don’t know that I don’t know the question anyone else that’s going to be on the episode 200 quiz these are really scared to have a hand-waving out there
what did I step in the music is the answer to the question which was Dan’s favorite my favorite Shoe Play If I had to choose between distilled the corner what’s going on with that house that evolved what’s going on what’s doing with your foot thing had the pantyhose challenge has gotten harder hey what’s up with that is going to come on man tell us a little bit more about that is my beautiful.
that one for the spotlight I mean is as easy on the eyes as she is lovely lovely she is not like you gave up her voice so she could walk on land with humans
she put it in her words she loves attention as much as anybody but she like she like unconditional attention as soon as it starts to get a conditional she doesn’t have the stomach for it you know I don’t know what some people are going to fucking hate my guts and tell me to kill myself with my air conditioner out with me

that attention to other people and she’s one of the ladder so I’m not going to make that choice for her and I don’t think she’s given to she’s not going to go like I should come up on stage where you from and what if I said Cody do you want to come up and say that she should be put under pressure and then if she came up we would even know if she wanted to know if she wanted to come up she’ll be right out the window and see how do you do your thing
don’t worry about it we got I asked
how can you have Dan put anything in this but since the first episode of her man challenge the Sharpie that I put in my butt in harman-wright that was a story that it was happening before Harper got a long time ago that we were just
and for some of you remember who did will you put something like this is great, this man in the world one of the sponsors is Mendeecees I can work it when I get a nickel for this Greg proops is getting all that $0.35 per second skin feels like I got a sizzling give me a hot item Goldberg how do you say pow did you get the associated with which of a while did they contact you if you have any great stories about in two doors out I have a lot of Lucha Vavoom is one of the coolest things ever got involved in that I just have mutual friends and they blank a patch of the buddy of ours yet hilarious comedian blanket patch and he and people like
Golden by the friends of ours would would rotate through with him and I just managed somehow to kind of be like a secondary host a lot in that show but being my friends come to the show what would the show is if you don’t know it’s part of Full House if you have two shows ago sitting right till I left was Morrissey and he look like morons they look bummed out the whole time
3DS games
I like sneaking over and taking selfies when I have been waiting for
haven’t had a dream in a lot of women are like is my frequently when he will come we will say I was here and I’ll give you that Vegas thing will you say that like the woman that Drank in the movie he directed the movie get the shit out of your ears
and I would say it don’t ever interrupt but it said that
200 episodes are like you we do it do it do it the end of the show like that we do we run Bill Morrissey and you can do is let Tina Angeles oh yeah
a real conversation that actually happen it really is a thing. Text that made no sense.
But we’re like the we do it and like it
I’m here that Maurice he’s here it’ll be an avalanche of people because right before we got up with this whole Entourage and just slipped out the side right way to go Morrissey was really going out the door I don’t know what it sounds like
I’ve only heard Morrissey in Prescott never heard
but the problem with me and more as it was I was the right age for to be in high school with people that the people that were in the Morrissey or just a bunch of assholes ruined I’d get specific about and buy alcohol for South discover hockey man
this one’s pretty tricky I got the five episodes out for it let’s make it four episodes I don’t think Dan can put them in order by air date is going to be 4 episodes
first wide
Grumble snakes
complete access to are The Gramercy New York Comedy Festival 2015 Night 2
I will complete access to areas last working backwards from that would be wide and then the one that’s not the Gramercy we’re not done Gramercy in the whatever one’s left out so it would be Grumble snakes wide.
why do snakes Gramercy wide no
this question is boiling it’s so hot snakes
Gramercy a wide and access to are for new pets and name of those
I mean I almost a year and again that’s not really a combined with a hot cue cues I think you should too hot to go great together Twitter’s riddle riddle riddle riddle best served their Pet Sematary you like would be great together and with Spencer in this one
has Goldberg had their dad buried them in a Native American burial ground and now they’re back but something’s different
all right now that you’re not out why I asked questions and you were enjoying the hot quiz and I felt bad for for trying to Railroad that contributed a combined to a guy or gal named Ron at our I jerk jerk jerk jerk as something along the lines of when are you going to make this show funky and drop a funky Beats
I’m going to combine that with work with a more recent off the Twitter griddled Burger didn’t we have him on the job before I didn’t make brown with food as a funny monkey which is what you asked Dan to do Ice-T explaining the simulation
and I believe exactly keep her back here are a sound check agendas extraordinaire has a Beat by one of our loyal how many Foster let’s drop that beat
alright Ice-T explaining the simulation in a in a rack
right about now
time to get serious
not that I’m ever not serious
when there’s a thing called the stimulation and you can’t see it when you stand in one place because it’s all around and the sound of my voice is being stimulated so fuck you
simulation in Japan
simulation in your ass out there once was a boy named John selling crack break your mama’s pussy so hot she had a heart attack I got to come down from that I was kind of surprised by my own freak me out back to the simulation I went outside like I said I don’t rhyme well
but I didn’t sound like iced tea since the beginning of this rat but okay it’s not personal business and personal is business that’s my not going to do it for iced tea back to the impression lickety-split simulation not personal not going to do it facing simulation Ice-T nation is it the Matrix are we a battery for that concept don’t work thermonuclear League spot so hard if you got a hot I made a friction now that makes sense I thought your mama like how many was El DeBarge
what type of the rabbit rabbit Rihanna hook the hook
emulation not real it’s not all in your head in your head is going up a chimney up onto the roof, so hot and I was like dr. Ruth I’m going to ask for it and sexuality I’m simulating everything is not reality I eat your pussy so good eating real Peppa Pig
too hard to make a life I thought your mama was sharp as a knife but that don’t mix those images
that’s some seven kit
I love the ladies around the street I love the hot dogs made of all kinds of meat that stimulation and it tastes good so if you had a simulation wouldn’t you do it the chit
are fun screen television dinosaur stories everything about this world is great cuz I’m having a good times and swimming in pools hit there was a simulation it would have three rules rule number one love Ice-T rule number to it’s all about me the number 3 I mean your mama teeth are so hard she can’t even see
best rap ever
that was out of town
I’m so glad we’re all here right now
can we please tell me we were recording
I started to show your about it rapping good at rock and roll know tonight you’re good at everything
does anybody here know anybody here bring a cello
side assist for Zach McKeever laying on the beach with my friend
Harry Forrester and that’s like the equivalent of like that’s like the makeup airbrush ain’t of you know that’s a big deal that’s like the foundation that I think are going to last for a while
there’s a lot going on at the El Debarge reference now.
References Lake Manor frozen lake before 89 what were the three I made your mama. I thought you so hard your mama can’t see
oh my God
I kind of wish I wasn’t here right now I wish I wasn’t here I want to be listening in my lonely Miami apartment
shooting that weird show all alone in my underwear and I jump up cheering I would get out of here that was really good Hooks and said hey hey
hey hey hey he just had a real big moment don’t worry Robbie’s not real problem what did I do in the Norman Lear episode that was I thought I was in really good omigod you don’t even have card you make people make you cards
that’s how it was before even came out you don’t open for we weave we talked about this Rob what did I do what do you come on I was really nice always been nice to me we’re good friends I do this is not I there was a couple episodes where I was like Trump I thought I would be a good bit to tell you the truth I wish I was there my bit right now would be to tell Trump to shut up
that’s that’s actually what I was ugly would be helpful
hey Robert Robert Robert go ahead and do that
if you’re not feeling it no it but if you’re quiet or not like
I’m only going to scold you when I feel like your school double
thank you thank you thank you thank you that would be a real good idea if somebody would do that for a change when I deserve it Robert the world’s best rap thing that there should have been wolves in their suspension could have come up and we’ll fight during that rap but as I can animals coyotes are different rules I could not demonstrating how he would it is 9:11 in the search hundred episode 2
it’s time to talk about politics how he would fight off a gang of coyotes using only a backpack and his feet then he had it he had figured it out I would we do that clip and then there would be like we’re all stuck in the can we have to keep warm by remembering things about harmontown that’s why I’m asking. Did I name my poop Mister about that
watching anatole’s posture change from like Yakov Smirnoff to fucking like like Dracula might be kind of similar to my girlfriend and that you’re not much of a showman are you I’m just saying like I like to I’m big fan of the show and I like connecting with people that I’ve heard their names and you’re one of them and we can see what you come up and just sit just for a second
I didn’t mean to do it I do know you and I see you started coming coming pretty early in the Run oh oh yeah like 4 years ago 3 years 40 years that was one of the guys from Adam in Spencer
yeah, I was just talking isn’t this like episode 204 something technically are you one of those people that was born in June
Spencer Jesus was born no no
Spencer celebration of the Equinox it was great at what do you mean that because we did have several episodes before we actually go there and this is the one where I got super duper drunk and probably cooked up and like I announce my return to community had a lot more unaired episodes by the way I really want to get a hold of those
we’re going to release me by the last episodes but I have been through so I had to go through a lot of my Persona is like like I had to come around to the realization and the internet had to become the white there was a point when the internet was just a place where people kind of huddled even after it was only nerds it was still then it was just like social Misfits and it was always in the internet’s existence right was still kind of felt okay to just go to expose yourself or whether I wasn’t like famous at anyway what they were doing I would never do that now because it’s like a feels like everything you weren’t so aware that other people were human looking at you aware of this it was like oh your wildest dreams someone would find this written on this coconut that you threw into the ocean and oh sure enough there’s there’s my friend Kelly Oxford she’s she’s she’s she’s respond
the comments and we’re friends because he’s one of the few people reading or the all my friends are reading it’s like there’s 600 people reading your Myspace blinds your kind of like Gossip Girl terms of like what you’re saying I’m assuming she got them so I don’t know how did The Flash Forward to like the Chevy Chase event which was like I wasn’t trying to put that on the internet I was but that was before we started podcasting I was playing it as a microphone here I thought you know don’t lie like hey what are the persons that why don’t you stand up
but then I was like oh I’m affecting other people’s lives I act I have to stick to talking about myself I can’t remember why we’re talking about this but what was the point no idea what this last episode was like I’m talking about community and I’m talking about Chevy Chase was like every time I open my mouth I just don’t want them to be touched by my thing you know if I didn’t explain explain like what happened I think it’s the actual episode where I played it that it was it was recorded at the last minute to read it on the internet has owed we go buy iTunes counting the episodes that we uploaded it start 200th episode is Spencer
so what do you think happens when you die you what happens when Spencer dies what happens when you die you stop living is what he says no
is there a vegetable in a long-term path probably Oblivion right now I don’t know
a white wife think about that they got so much other shit to worry about
what you’re worrying about I’m riding I don’t you know working on harmonquest coming to see cell
I love that attitude I don’t care about that I have a TV show TV show make sense I’m sure King Tut didn’t come for the pyramids to be made like during some big battle
but everyone can see the whole time I’m sure he was like there’s no words used to enslave what should I do with them was a fucking City
what if you had to navigate by Q from Andrews brogue a stroke at a stroke hot Q’s kill Mary Rob Adam auntie
well I’m going to try them I assume it’s Rob I wouldn’t be so sure about this
because he’s he’s sensitive and he’s like he’s going to know how to act like we’re going to agree we’re going to escape it and then I eat a lot of Mary Spencer cuz he drives me to work every day I don’t know I don’t think I was and I was robbed as it was what do you mean where do you do dance
Rob and I marry one of us killed anyone second Spencer will you marry me
I hope I get invited to the wedding guests Aren’t Alright Alright so so so the night okay I should back into this world who I’d kill like the thing is like if I kill if I kill yeah well it should kill Goldberg and then I wouldn’t have to like it wouldn’t have to leave ruin our lives would be like like like like when we packed it and yeah for that thing where you had to fight either fuck me or kill me yeah
I do remember that thank you for like no thank you alright life is weird yeah I know I guess I’m married to Shrub
that’s not cool I’m not going to just make a movie fuckmarrykill
I’m man enough to admit that I think of anywhere you can’t hide in your house all night in a rabbit mask and draped in an American flag because levels
I’m wearing a clerical collar cuz he didn’t religion killing more people than all the wars in the world I think about it
always leave them wanting more
I mean about
48.50 minutes you can do 20
did they didn’t expect that from you and Jeff but I’m going to add what order well I mean you’ll be easier to marry after you’re dead
I would like to hear the phone
what if someone could fuck you so hard
it’s so satisfying when you would die of pleasure you just said that you fucking playing at pussy with a knife
I didn’t admit it stop that
don’t make me turn this podcast around
alright then take me to kill Rob schrab Rob corddry Rob Schneider
that’s a good one
you’re like yeah I’ll kill Snyder cuz I don’t know him and and so then I am marrying
I got hostiles to Elmira Drive-In window at yeah we’re like an Auntie could we can figure it out I got to do a couple appletinis I know exactly how I’d fuck you
I mean
with the house I got the house I got the house
I get the house
antique what do you what do you feel like you’ve either learned or unlearned after all these are harmontown episodes you wisely stop coming
I took like a two-and-a-half year I mean I don’t know if I learn anything I’ve never tried so little to be a part of something you’re already accepted
just even for HD or H’s I didn’t get that hot cute is Dave playing in the house
do you cry with me let me know I’ll have what he’s had so all I can say before I’m throwing out
thank you
that’s what I’m doing I hope that’s my job
I like a white button-up shirt and I’ll pick up the sheriff department Town
David Davis just like a guy in the scene where it like as a bunch of people like that chordsmen there eat like drinking out of like wooden goblet and he’s definitely a drug dealer in a Broadway musical
clay clay clay clay clay play a Broadway musical songs are illegal Black Market songs
was my birth certificate resale Jam freestyle gems on down step darling don’t step on your glasses they fell off their right underneath intimate moment that’s okay but just don’t step on your glasses today. He’s wearing a seat cover
can you call that whatever you wants to come only have two things I’d rather picture them having legs so that they can run around saying I don’t have arms and then picture of the line same one of us and he told us that old Moon and ladies I have one
thing you need to know you either know how to choreograph a leg
or you don’t
snap into a slim jim. I think it might possibly be in charge of this giant can of Fosters
Unleashed no not New Zealand Australia a nation built on the social experiment of the best prisoners and mine’s they could get I’m just saying like I don’t want to see like a lot of Australia’s stuff like necessarily I’m just saying like as America becomes more and more social experiment
put our criminals are masterminds on an island where they were just like murderers Wallace no no no not that much happier there what was it have to apologize to Rob Schneider was thinking he was the guy in Corky the movie
yep cuz I will I’m Rob Schneider
well I mean I mean cut his fucking head off Klein is gripping that microphone so tightly feels like the ball of it will smash I’m only going to say this well I don’t believe that for a second he’s definitely my grip
I got a hot Cube I got to knock you to stay for the whole panel your mom was a dancer that’s not a wonderful news my mother was the leading coloratura Sopranos with the New York City that’s right that’s right
conduit for all the light in the universe
my mama was yeah that’s right where you did you actually go to class or long story short so
I dropped it again
I would say I was at the Brooklyn Public Defender’s office trying to like be a social justice Warrior and I saw some gnarly and I went to Italy to follow my folks to do an opera Festival in the glory and Linda people that can like kind of put all the darkness aside Channel The Fury of their Spirit guides my favorite person in the world go for it
that means like I’m fucking around with VR and guys that are doing 360 like I’m fucking around like fucking rob corddry like a beautiful spirit talk to him and Guy listen to me like I’m somebody I can’t even handle the sky so great
all I got to say is
my wife change my day like
what I listen to some spirits in the darkness and all I can say is you’re not the only one but you’re one of them and it sucks it’s crazy to say you’re a spirit in the darkness the darkness one another
spirit in the dark as he’s so dark Robert and you sound like you’re being sarcastic Robert Robert everybody else everybody else up here is being honest like a stick for a minute
I you want to I don’t I don’t I don’t agree with Dave you just want to go out that way
I will thank you Dave means a lot to me. Who what Game of Thrones house is David Klein from 84
the wife you up to back up and go wait what the fuck to explain to me what happened 3 episodes before I don’t know if I know how hard you guys are the Game of Thrones but I like one thing when that when that ruined the first man that redheaded Mastermind gave me the look she gave him a little bit of a look tonight
on Sims 3 nights ago
can I go down today playing you’re getting 50% love and 50% not hate but those are good numbers 50% in my experience indeed be married but one of them is a client I know that you can man and that’s why I love you somebody else and I won’t go back to find a time it’s growing up too fast Somerset can we get Dave Klein and I might even say maybe Dan and you guys do a little dirty white Marilyn Manson Rock & Roll Metal he’s really good on you I will cut this out quickly this is it doesn’t have to be a few minutes late just let it go
290 me to give you a chili when you guys
the best night of my life

Voltaire books brand
tell you what year it is and you better get it quick cuz I ain’t no front man son
I know frontman know what’s going on
wow winter is coming you guys
I mean you can type I mean but it’s not going anywhere
I of the fat finger butt
all right you got to finish on your ass but the voice
I’m not stopping
plate mail
a rare encore
fantastic man oh man
poor auntie
I just I just felt like in his shoes I felt it was just going on just of General climax of temperature look if the whole lotta hey hey it looks like we’re a bar before you leave if nothing to sell here
Regis is ice over here instead of the table I don’t know why it keeps the bike over there Rob what did I know it’s not it’s not it’s not
just be like fucking near just go and then and then somebody goes like oh you know what he did now you’re like like everything stop stop stop what do you mean by that but now do you know you can’t do that I just did it know
I forbid it you did it but I forbid it is forbidden to all right just kind of based on other ways to look at your phone when people talk to you from today
somebody asked if we could sing either chicken noodle dick or Pringles dick I would have you know the words to them
you think you know the words to what is that
what is it what is that don’t help him get put it together now.
50 chance that you knew every word to it no I don’t
the songs 2
and I didn’t add the music somebody else that one of our how many times did that was great and I was a super fan fan with a photographic memory for us just you’re worried about you. Remember that shit man
forgive me I forgot your name Doug Doug Doug Doug
hot in here so I’m jealous of those calves
so you want to get some pizza, Pringles I gave my dad gets out of Franco’s can cuz if it’s the same as safe and dry never really found out why here.
then I eat very much
what you’re doing here is awesome what are you doing what is this what is this movement I could be back for two and a half years what do you know why you leave the bunker I got a noodle chicken noodle
I got to take a noodle can
I’ve been doing okay
I’m thinking chicken noodle man you got to work all days chicken noodle menu
Spencer doesn’t remember his special face
you are the most beautiful people on earth
swear to God that’s my own song that I improvised call Pringles dick I want to write a song the song that that’s like 3 hours to craft Hey Jude
and that song is almost like an hour left
how about when we got it we knew that we’d had some you guys nailed it I’ll tell you that I’ve been working on it was worth it for the song that I use for my alarm it’s the what’s the quick way to go to Sam’s and then I can look for it or do you want me to look for it while you keep the show go wild dance doing that Spencer a lot of the hot cheetos are about missing the game mastering and that mole fuck you
here’s some excuse for about 35 seconds
that’s amazing
I don’t think I can do it anymore you don’t blink a lot. Well just told me that he took he took some mushrooms for his freezer not long ago so
I’m sorry that they were probably old enough
is Mom’s cool his mom’s cool
yeah her mom fucks her that shit
did she put them in the freezer how do you how do you find the thing that you use when your alarm on your actual alarm in the alarm set cuz it’s not a good time just take your time take everything you need is right in this little thing to write weight with the guy with the IT department it’s the one that went when I set an alarm
it’s not what your underwear like whenever I set an alarm in the what are you doing look at his pictures just go right to just blew that weird shit
could I hear you it’s this song
you guys do this one
so I am still working
wait ok Google again but but but I’m taking it cuz Okay okay I noticed
okay now I have to have to let it go over its cuz cuz it it’s it starts right away after all that I fucking missed it
are you a joke about how long it took and now it’s like are we at just went into a black so we can get this over with only through this is going to be great if you want to talk about it
is sucking okay I got it on the mic but I’m going to put me last on the mic cuz then you’re alright okay here we go
oh my God like a spring-loaded trap
I’m creeping with you sleeping I’m snooping when you pooping
I can’t
I want you to get this right and again and again
get this right
I have to know
pics of Jordan up in the morning I’m hearing a different cuz it doesn’t sound like it’s working right it’s like it’s like work it out. I’m sorry I didn’t finish that song for us I don’t even think it’s the right Melody
I’m snooping when you’re pooping I see you in what European I need something like like like like like like like like like like I don’t know if you need something like it needs to rhyme with like the shooting cuz it cuz it cuz it’s like Elsa like of the subject is that it’s a very pleasant sorry but it’s clearly about some creepy man who’s like in your apartment
what’s up
bareback bareback like Putin I and where you’re drooping that’s gross
didn’t have to rhyme I probably should have welcomed you guys at do it early stage of open and open and then yeah I know I don’t mind does not true rhyme I might have the right that your soul recognizes another rhyme that makes sense in Coralville right it’s about sound you hear what your soul that was your Lexicon no stop it we need to hear a long time ago we need you what about when you were getting somebody ever been in my life
but what are you handsome is but I don’t know I know that
Frederick Ellington going to call your card or just because I say Rob’s somebody is there a Harmony in like favorite person from listening to the show from the past that is not present spoiled the last two times I’ve been on it was a guy called I called him out and he was and that lived up to all my expectations and teased hair decline we’re like best friends by this point boy who else is there Jane never met James Jana’s New York I think it’s a great way to harmontown programming President Steve Levy
hey everybody
what what are we talking about this is all true though and harmontown had his biggest year yet and it’s not going to stop there
yes yes the fourth quarter of two thousand
promises bigger shows bigger audiences and bigger events yes stammering
more syllables per cent
who’s all in the fourth quarter of 2016 is going to have lots of I mean it’s definitely I mean we’re going to a lot of places this year we’re going to be in some huge venues like crazy but internationally yeah we say that we’re going to be in Canada I mean we didn’t sign in on Sunday you know how hard it is you got a book in advance
you know how you get to the Vatican
Ono Ono practice
will will be in Canada Montreal first then Toronto September I think we could spend this Christmas season and then Christmas season real hard on it are very first Canoga Park show Israel Australia
and look look under your seats and everybody has a plane ticket
you might be listening and they were very mad about the fact that koalas aren’t bears and that nobody drinks Foster’s they’re marsupials everybody knows they’re marsupials I didn’t know that you couldn’t be a quality the real bears to the world but there’s there’s marsupial mammals of all kinds of like you know I mean look at the difference between those guys who can’t blame you tell you they all look the same marsupials things with yeah you got a point now thank you
vicious also need to put crowns on them
do they put any Barbie
little bit how do you say Barbie or is that not even too ridiculous
price you know what I love about the Australians and the English get away with this when you say like I know a guy we would say
BB Derek and you would say he’s called Eric like he’s called Derek I would love to be able to say that
you just did not but as an example but I can’t just say that normally it would be and I would be affecting it right to be right
it is the c word
yeah it’s like it’s like it’s like a funny it’s kind of like what like like we’ve managed to coax bitch into it like you can stay at misogynistic lie but use my bitch can also just be like I’m like really I think they’d see where you can take everywhere but America they’re more comfortable is just like she really
no that’s fuck you guys
not cool. You forced me into that you’ve forced me into that and that was a cheap joke and I take it back but you still laughed my daughter is obsessed with curse words right now she’s obsessed with it the other night she was like you know that me and my wife were there putting her to bed and feel like you know if we have thoughts in our head we think something in our head it’s okay I’m like yes you can she knows it’s a simulation
that’s what I’m getting at that’s what I’m getting at
she’s like yes you can think anything you want you can pick any of it but you just can’t say certain things like the f word you can’t say the f word you just can’t say sorry it’s rude and she’s like what you can think it
yeah you can think it she like for instance I’m thinking at right now
I’m thinking it when I say flugelhorn and today she just said daddy the the the worst curse word is the IMF because yeah that’s a really bad one but I was like when she said that she has no idea about the c word she said she never even had the kids in her school don’t even haven’t even been exposed and that word yet on the minutes
it’s like that it’s like it’s like she she’s learning about societal hypocrisy now she’s going to unlearn it then do it by the time she’s like 15 or something like like we’re all Geniuses when we were to let me know everyone’s full of shit stressing like the hold the lesson is like you can think whatever you want your head with a jesus-like isn’t that funny I just like like like 20 years from now she’s not even isn’t that the reason I want to kill myself one thing and saying another Spiral until you die right now she’s like that seems fun I’ll do that for 70 years ago that you have no idea it’s going to
you’re going to have to make a language is going to lose all meaning to you and end connection will become a miracle it will become something that acts happen to accidentally end and is abused
call Jane our friend just texted me and said hello and she said she loves you tell her I said you hear Kelly alarm song on the loop if you want to do you want to get one more crack are you see if I can take I don’t think I don’t think it’s working. I need to I need to really figure it out and I don’t think it’s I think it’s it’s it’s like I hear a different one of my head cuz it doesn’t work
but it doesn’t know she’s singing it
shut up
I’m dying while you’re snoozing hahaha it wake up to that what was the elf song way back there was a song that he sang about I’m a fucking Elf or something but I had a better be a treat I mean we don’t have to
and I also found out that that this financial quarter before we do our next in within the next two hundred episodes I will also write lyrics to The Popcorn Song by hot butter popcorn I know it’s just something like all these kernels going to pop popcorn never stops when you got the figure it out
yeah that’s good yeah
Yeah Yeah Yeahs y broom when you can mop this is a stupid all right we’ll figure it out but it’s going to take a nap I’m almost certain I said this if I said it on the show I would have been a very long time ago but you know you’re rapping when you’re around the house cleaning the house and making a sandwich and you rapping so how much I have a game where how can I embarrass myself so much that I stopped doing it and I’m watching and if anybody else is a long time ago but I was taking a shit
and I said I ate so much poop I too much food I could poop on a dude
it made me laugh for a while I remember when we were in the car well I like I like to eat poop I use it everyday I want my poop back I’m about to have a heart attack
I’m about to have a lack of food with heart attacks as well and that’s it with with with some kind of some kind of high-risk high-yield
oh yeah oh yeah make your body go I make it go fire until you just hit the Stars I’ll write it up like a penny racer I thought you so hard that it wasn’t a racer it made you stop existing do you wear in a simulation I fuck you so hard you get itchy delation I made you food I made you PB&J I fucked you so hard you turned into curds and whey you sat on a tuffet for your name is Miss Muffet spider came down and have a safe buddy said fuk it we said Mother Goose playing a broom and put your mama’s so hard I made room in her womb
went inside and saw myself I put a trainable up on a shelf from a collector of rare Antiquities theft your mama’s so hard grew 3/4 of her but I myself I’m a clone project in a Sci-Fi movie that takes place in the near future let me start over. I don’t know how long it says
it’s going to be in the morning everyday until the break of John I know you are you’re in the studio yeah but
we’re busy I don’t obviously I know the metaphor is pretty thin
I just want some
but do you want my respect r s e s p s Dad forgot how to spell it and it’s in a famous song Yo Yo Tony take it easy
people take it easy all right take it easy you did it again to text finally you admit you have problems too
yo back in the day by used to miss you but now I miss you in a different way when I’m going from town to town and I’m going to start to feel for you know they do stupid or it tastes so good in my mouth the deconstructed phone pea-soup is from the south and make it to agency put black peas in it I don’t even want to do it I’m on my knees women over asking you why are my other problem has a baby baby want to come home and take a piss in the toilet only one Great Wraps on going to be in the same show already of the greater rap from
tell me three words that start with Def Leppard to the rich after lately
when we were children we would see a lightning bug flying for the park the lightning bug fly away lightning bugs in a jar
that’s the Trap right now
techno Viking Garden
play that play the music and stop doing the bit about how bad the rap is sleeping music only never helped everybody was telling me to stop it I try to help it out that’s alright everybody one more time
where are they going to lay down some crazy or at
feeling emotions are feelings
put it on YouTube put it on your pizza put it everywhere where you think it needs it to the spice ginger in the kitchen cooking twice looking for you.
I’m ten times spores hot chocolate with marshmallow I thought your mama and she said hello I said you did that in the wrong order you’re supposed to bring me before I was born here with you she said borders with me I said yeah she said I said okay I’m going to go outside
start and I saw it. I took it up a tree I cut down a lot since the dog died cuz the tree fell down and I buried it and then I
I saw the life I took your mama tonight I bought her dinner I bought her I just put your mama and I have to poop I went in the bathroom I came outside and I said I hated whooping why I said she said I should take you to a doctor
put it on my heart
to look at your eyes to look at my writing up you said you got cancer I said what did I do so during a dancer maybe it’s too hard
what’s the weather
I want to have it there was a stipulation and I said hey what was you doing
I created the Earth I’m at the Pearly Gates to keep you out too so you got to go back now you got no clock to take Peter is here to keep your ass on the other side and then I didn’t and I want a site like a robot but I didn’t get invited I was walking around 6.
but I didn’t and I went to help and I killed the devil and I said well
being sad we can plant trees in recycle or garbage
I don’t have a plan of action
episode 123
we’ve learned things before the races to why I made friends with lesbians
how to private show.
Spencer Crittenden
Adam Goldberg
play everybody on the hot shoes but if the laptop charger is everybody
are you from the lightning bug thank you very much
I’ve had to take chances


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