Episode: 229 – Health Care Is Good, Black People Deserve To Live


Episode: 229 – Health Care Is Good, Black People Deserve To Live


Founders of Reductress, Beth Newell and Sarah Pappalardo join Harmontown to promote their podcast Mouth Time and Dan tries to gain a feminist perspective, our friend Brandon Johnson returns and more! Watch the video at harmontown.com/live


Hollywood California knock down, cuz they’re two seater
thank you for coming to the show
alright my therapist she recommended a book for me and she didn’t tell me she just told me the title and then I got and then the guy started talking and it is it it’s a needy but I think I might be on the verge of a diagnosis
but she didn’t want it you can tell cuz I was like to recommend another box and she’s like just let me know how this one goes but I think like she’s very big grudging like cuz you know I’m a self-diagnosed sir but I think she put wanted to put the kibosh on that right away so they can’t fucking autistic composer it’s hard and it literally on the thing that spreads The Blob like the beginning of the book get it even went to say how’s it going hey guys the beginning of the book went so far as to say ATD people have a hard time finishing books and
book was made with that advice but with that in mind they did not go that extra mile to make it accessible to ATD people I don’t think it was a great way to get away with writing a shity book on audio books it is called driven to distraction or not
Harlequin romance novels
might have eight hours and then I could only get the 3-hour was because I wasn’t on Wi-Fi and then that he begins it says like this is the three hour version cuz you have a DD but then also an additional a very boring. Boring book on medication
but the people I know that actually have that are diagnosed with ADD or ADHD and they take adderal they don’t get like a beat that they actually just as their memory isn’t it 15 minutes of this 12-hour audiobooks I can tell you if there’s a lot of misconceptions first of all it’s a everybody’s different. Everything is like it should be called attention disorder if it was going to be like named in a way that would help you like people have hyper-focus people have that are easily distracted like like like like scattered the did you just it’s like it’s kind of it’s it’s it’s all over the place you have hyper empathy you have it does a lot of overlap with things that you could see like you could diagnose somebody being bipolar like a lot of a lot of the things like you could both bipolar people in a DD people they could be high heel identically in certain situations
play it’s time to be like all that person’s bipolar or ADHD and you could be another thing cuz like both of those categories you could in spite of all out word empirical evidence that you’ve you’re doing fine you could feel like you’re a piece of shit and you need to just eat a bucket of shit and jump off a roof like in the first place cuz you just sit around an Asus TUF you never look it up a t h d vs 80d it’s not the it’s not like a TD and then you changed the name they change the name to ADHD you can have a form of ADHD in which you’re not hyperactive it’s called ADHD minus the H they don’t call it a DD they changed the name there’s some clinicians with the new DSM changed it up that’s why autism the same
super exciting exciting what do you think your your hyper thing is what do you hyper about
you want you’re excited at all and I got that because I told the pharmacist from Yelp that I had trouble watching movies or something by I remember what yeah yes yes three questions and said you definitely have a DD which I know you’re never supposed to say so but I have some things that I have that I would be relieved to learn more symptomatic I have a very very not because they would excuse the behavior because they would help me that would Empower me to go I got to work on that you know it’s I just have a really hard time being interrupted you may notice that sometimes I snap at you a little bit if I’m in the middle of a story
easy easy joke with rehearse at Backstage
but if I could be in the middle of a tweet like a fucking dumb observation that Trump is a dick or something like that ended my girlfriend could come over like I’m in the middle of a tweet and I like trying to read where it like or I can be in the middle of a thought or it will let alone like then you bring like addictive things like Minecraft or so I can see that like or if I’m in the middle of a train of thought even though I just ramble I don’t have a right to be upset when people interrupt me I would never stop talking if nobody interrupts the big eruption is like I have a harder as I get distracted and I’ll either go like wait or or like pretend to listen to what that is I think and like so knowing that you have that you go like okay I will work on that you know and there’s like things I’m excited to learn about called like a interactive metronome or something like that I don’t know sounds like it’s okay
sounds fun there’s like treatments you can treat yourself you know I think everybody should we go to the Moon we should all treat her usual we’re going to do in both sets of the words we’re going to all everyone everyone’s personalities going to be a disease every what’s your name sir Tom you have thomism you you you you have hyper Tom disorder or or or or inappropriate TomTom disorder like that but that doesn’t mean you get to just run around bar
it’s an invitation for other people to accept who you are that’s Tom he has Tom has them and then also the other side has you got to be they’re going to do that because they think that when you go home you’re like you owe it to them to be like a fucking time as I’m going to work on this ship until I’m going to tell him like you know
futuristic members-only windbreaker and not sure if there’s a hood or not do it equipment back there and it wasn’t what I was doing was beautiful
it’s a beautiful idea everyone exactly what you do and now I know whenever I share beautiful things with you guys and I sense that you guys don’t appreciate me enough it’s just the disease it’s you guys aren’t assholes
I used to think I was a piece of shit and then you guys are making me feel that way and then like I would go home and I got that audience I love them but we got to figure this shit out of my head like you’re just a bunch of people sitting around who knows what they all have diseases of your merry merry merry merry itis and Ralph
what’s the pressure of Entertainment Tonight on some wonderful guest huh Sarah and Beth really celebrated awesome
when should we know their last issue we introduce them with by their last names too before we stay here we got you don’t know these people names offhand honest because I have ADD and don’t worry about me
please welcome Beth Newell and Sarah pappalardo from reductress
all right so reductress is a
a parody satirical news site with a feminist could be satirizing both the Fenris point of view and the world around us it’s no use for the web for popular like it’s one of the old few like like like a temps in a Post newspaper world where they all recognize that the onions and the web became like this horrible Cesspool and, you seem to just like that onion instincts seem to just go to call should be it should be powerful if you can constantly lie, I’m so happy that someone is pointing out how clickhole is pointing out how we’re all fucked
world knows how fucked-up the internet is yet so they don’t even understand what clickhole is doing its really hard to satirize garbage a little younger than the nocne I’m not going to justify you but you you seem smooth and
thank you. They are certainly younger than you
I think that is it hot
and the woman about generational stuff versus like a relationship like I’m 44 I’ve sat up here a lot and said like I don’t think the kids are I don’t think they get irony is much they don’t see any at all.
we still have it right but is it is it is it let me know what you guys to eat and stuff delivered tweet bin like you make a joke that’s a question and someone answers the clan and I just wanted an end result Alex repeat your joke for that matter I can’t believe Tom Cruise and do that it’ll be like they’re actually more ironically detached than me cuz they’re doing up that stuff more irritating than my bed cuz I don’t think I know what they’re saying let me explain it to them also there’s the whole thing
Wicked wanting to debate whether women are funny and then the other half of the time when women the funny women who like their Force say things that are crazy sometimes that are a little inappropriate down harder than any dude right I mean your bias probably your women
but you but you noticed that right like big boobs didn’t hear the question as as women that are doing comedy are you guys of the camp of like suck it up buttercup because we want to be judged on how funny we are or are you of the camp of like Jesus Christ people need to realize that the perception is all out of whack I don’t give you that choice why is there is a kind of like the second I don’t want to be judged because my work because I’m a woman I want to be judged for what actually make same time it is fucking hard for women to do this because it always becomes about like how did you do it like you don’t see male comedians Memoirs way more obsessed with how did they do it like how do they close
Bellucci liked wrote a book and said they when he was six years old he put He found a piece of gravel up his little brother’s ass like like that that wouldn’t be coming up over and over again out of the internet Lena Dunham is what is a tremendously entertaining person to me she’s really like she’s not a senator she’s like whatever why I’m not trying to kiss your ass and clean it. Send it.
the meter is running
General sense of pulling back to just doing your your your on a website you’re parodying a cesspool which parodies itself do you guys have any are you guys like the head honchos reductoras his Partners have to seek out investors I just got distracted by a whole line of questioning but go with it so the internet is a ship place to make money so we make money so when you sat down and said this is worth trying it’s going to be brutal cuz there’s no way to monetize its going to fucking suck uphill battle do you have a full lot did you do you have like a comedic mission statement
a question I mean the community mission statement was mostly just like women’s media sucks and it doesn’t represent us and we’re smarter than this Escape unless it’s going to get you in trouble like that frustration like like when you look at the the pre reductress landscape of women’s comedy like what do you mean
having the big one was the fear and insecurity to make them buy things ultimately and then later on we started seeing empowerment marketing like the ads also using empowerment feminism in order to sell things woke me up more like like a homeless if I see a thing and I’m a guy and I see something and it’s like Hi-5 this woman for doing this like I think of the back of my head I’m like I’m like like like like like if I were a woman that would make me mad but then I don’t know if it would make you mad men see that and they’re like they don’t think that things known they think women are dumb in like that thing so we were trying to
you blowing my mind I’d never it’s true I think I bet that’s true like you have a tendency to because we have we have preconceived like Investments emotionally that we no matter who we are that we had like it’s stacks of poker chips in this game that we did not know we never met discount or like so if somebody says look at this body positive parade Marshal episode title
massage parlor and you’re like okay you’re only clicking on it if that interests you and it only interest U of A you’re a big Charlie Sheen fan or a big fan of massage or if Charlie Sheen’s a clown do you want to like it off your chest in the comment section like the stuff that has to do with women like like that Charlie Sheen thing I never think of my head of why is Charlie Sheen making me try to why is he want me to think things about him other than he’s into massage in his a good businessman I’m going to go disabuse him of that notion but if somebody tweets like oh Amy Schumer’s new music video does this and that and it’s not she doesn’t get to be in charge of how her joke is being delivered and then you go and you go I’m going to
thank you
we’ll be right back
Dove soap
I don’t know I guess I guess I kind of acted like I was cheating you guys up to say something about all I did was
I mean it’s interesting cuz it seems like you know Charlie Sheen just exists like he is an objectively existing and yet a woman is just a thing to place all of your reject all of your fears insecurities and anger onto it seems like it’s all our jobs have opinions about women it just doesn’t work the same way for men not to set you up to sound like a but do you think that that is localized culturally like a chronologically or do you think that that is like a weird like like crazy primate condition that the that that that women are scary demand and kind of like like the end may be scared to each other at like there’s like this weird flow of energy in that direction condition by media to like fear women especially if they’re in a position of power so like that’s all
are we see a woman in charge she’s like a horrible boss and she sucks Charlie Sheen like he can be here five years we could say he likes fix all the problems and people would forgive him and he’d make a new movie in there be some like Redemption story but if the garbage pile of Lindsay Lohan and it’s like she just never comes back and it said there is like before I started like examining that stuff like like your punching down before you know you’re punching down like you did because you think you’re punching up because you’re a guy and unlike women are just like they’re just important and and they didn’t buy a ticket to that ride and they’re also not all the same thing but to you they are because of your situation as that combined with with with privilege
equals like the situation where it’s like you can’t get out of the Starting Gate if you were to say I want to be a woman and I’m going to be funny in this way and it’s like explaining it to you that
it does feel like punching up I think when you’re taking a person who’s in such a high level of power like Amy Schumer they’re like so successful as women it’s like we only got to this year you know it like it’s like you guys had a lot but you know so you’re like I just I was watching a documentary about sex dolls
there’s a couple of these Executives about guys who have their $6,000 guys who are dedicated to the dream of inventing sex dolls the guys were engineering them in the guys who can’t wait to be there for a customer and I feel like I’m in the garage like making sex dolls all of the other guys are like I can’t wait to have a sex robot when they get when they graced the topics of like just a sex in general even though they’re supposed to be deconstructing it with with pride and whistle on they still feel like you’re as the pelvic thrust for a certain other activities if you know what I mean I know what you mean this whole thing is a camera crew in your garage or making a dick piston like that so
why do you talk like it’s NASCAR and here’s the thing like like the guys that are waiting for the sex robots who also talk like that they go there and I’m looking for a certain as I kind of like the shirt for visceral topics that wouldn’t like the guys that are inventing the sex robot by making them in their garage and it’s hard to make beautiful things by scratch with Lumber and Nails the under all of that budget in your Sim City of life from Mike physical attractiveness kind of like it hard to like. Already hard to make a thing that looks like a beautiful human being in the first place and then these guys are trying to make a thing that like
that’s right and talks right and goes like this and so what I noticed for that reason is that then they would go to these these guys were connoisseurs Pay It Forward kind of stories of sex robot that don’t exist yet and all of them as the energy between them talking about this guy’s new sex robot he’s like I’m in time unveiling sensor but it just looks like David Lee Roth focused on other Southern functionality that thing just looks like your uncle in a wig and and
and it just as I’m doing right now it’s like those guys they cut between them and all of guys that are like if you know what I mean about all that like stuff that has to do with their intimacy that then wanting pleasure when they got to say that it’s ugly like they just relax you can see the weight come off of their shoulders and I don’t know how to work Tik-Tok I was like I paused it and I was like straight guys are going like it’s not that they’re bringing that background of this it doesn’t feel like punching down but you’re you want we want to punch down like we have an urge and I don’t I think that probably all human beings feel like we just we we all have some area where we justify it somehow like I’ll go I’ll be like in a comment section of Jezebel and like watching under some articles like here’s your here’s your thing where you get to call someone a piece of fucking subhuman shit you know he will need to make a robot to be like
they started coming up and I wouldn’t fuck her with someone else’s dick and other stuff I like when you’re talking about your own dick but I wouldn’t put it with someone else just like each other because we feel like you’re ugly you’re ugly. You’re ugly
all right well I told you told you I told you I went out what I’ll do with your besties like a girls trip to huge family gathering Viking soul food do you miss meeting the parents so I can get out well actually, never misses that but you can still do all of these things with me Desmond Thorne on my podcast adventures in Black Cinema each week I take you on a journey through a new black film how it relates to the culture and sometimes have the themes related my own life so it’s always a little tea and a slight bit of embarrassment and of course as a filmmaker myself and one of the blackest Phil nerdiest film nerds like ever you’re always in good hands
adventures in Black Cinema with Desmond Thorne executive-produced by Amanda seales new episodes every Tuesday on all major podcast platforms
you want to meet my friend Brandon Johnson his black is black
Brandon come out Brandon Joshua
the Magics already started welcome, so happy to be back then what were all the black man from the 30s
I want to be like one of those 70 80 year old that has a kick-ass came you know yeah and I just one of the cool old dudes that you see walking down the road and I can you can pull off like a cane with like an owl head on it yeah I wanted to be I wanted to be full of Jameson a little bit of weed in a little bit of cocaine when I bump into some young dude he’s like a motherfuker
I’m not so unimpressive after all
Diamond hit that motherfuker
I change my ambition I want to be at any point where I’m confident, it’s mine because they do not they give you that look like you not cool no more do you want a black dude behind the counter and she serves you a pork chop you like all thanks old black lady at the probably going to be delicious this year old black man in this sweater handed you a pork chop you be like fuck that what did you do wrong
that’s a very interesting but thank you for the compliment that you look like a very well I’m just trying to find out who killed bumpy Knuckles black detective is that a black Detective
I think it’s in all the papers is there a is there a Charlie Chan for blackleg like an old-timey detective archetypes that was okay well I’m not going to I’m not going to throw his detective work under the bus but
I mean going back to Charlie Chan days when it was like like what was there is there like a classic like Uncle Ben of detecting like like
there’s not there’s that there was there there isn’t right because I want to make up with dude for you right now
work at all dude
and if you’re rested moments later because your women in 10 minutes and you you’re making Alex at Tanner’s of like that would you think right now with Trump being Trump and being an office office. Do you think I’m hoping it’s the case with the March that’s going to happen all the stuff do you think there will be some awesome like Revolution like for women now because it’s so ridiculous that we are we all get to actually call this shit out and like women get to be full on vocal activist at all times 53% of white women are finally going to like latch onto 90s feminism like they’re going to finally catch up with the rest of the world
and then they’re going to make some like movie about in 20 years he really still satisfied
seriously a lot of people in this country that need to catch up with just like basic tenets of feminist what third-wave feminism is even about really basic stuff like equal pay and Reproductive Rights of those two have jobs that I would guess that third-wave feminism is about diminishing you can’t even get through that name without getting the subconscious implication is that it’s fleeting and has been done before and will be done again who came up with that phrase is it the crowd is it was I who came up with it someone in the audience probably knows better than me
do your brows burning lasagna and I know it does
when are you going to realize you’re just women doesn’t matter how many waves you go through there just waves they come in they go out. Isn’t that kind of like a subconscious like going to go to a grinch. Sunita riots and shit like my own record calling for a physical actual prosecutable action when we met I am I I I think it’s time to light torches and pitchforks, to be on Twitter as the world CB radio but a guy used it to become our first like actual evil president like
you just just got on Twitter and was like breaker breaker
and everyone that was like hashtag and cancel Colbert because of Isaiah look like that didn’t work but that did I think that means the Twitter’s probably for listening at that so much for getting stuff done and then you go back to Old wheat paste fire wheat paste
shut up on a wall if people have to see tell him fucking fucking yeah takedown takedown they live glasses
look I don’t know
I’m going to I’m going to get off my lawn
I’m 3 months from Kaylee every time I have a rant on Twitter I’m like 30 minutes later I’m like we do
but you just do don’t don’t don’t flip off no one else to do or what is you and Mark Hamill what are you doing
have you heard from Mark Hamill doing lately has a Batman son amazing I know last person to know about it so I’m explaining to no one but he has Trump Tweets in the voice of the Joker and it’s fucking amazing happy new year is it
and it’s so perfect I anyway yeah I feel like sometimes I feel like I’m 3 months out for just a minute what am I doing I should just sit in the lawn chair put on a red baseball cap and say who loves Trump so much they’re willing to work for some minimum wage for me
like I can just game the system this is how Nazism works like you just guys like me just slowly go I’m tired
when is women’s March 21st 00 a space that is not La an Omnibus permit was taken out that prevents any marches during inauguration day to to be dedicated to anything meaningful likely to be a big ass fucking free for all crazy ass like it’s going to be huge cuz there’s like it’s not like four times the buses like it’s 200 buses for inauguration is 1200 buses for the women’s March so that’s impressive
I hope it’s eight billion people weather report start coming in with people trying to covertly Stir It Up and getting exposed as fucking like you know that they’re trying so desperately to do it because we lost we lost like oh that sucks but it’s like holy shit we haven’t lost in a long tightly we haven’t been to the people that are allowed to just do anything with no accountability to logic you can just stay in the presence of a fuking idiot you should be thrown in prison and anyone that comes at your goes like
I don’t have to hang out I don’t I don’t I’m not saying is like when the Dixie Chicks talked shit about Bush they were nearly we get to talk so much shit about Trump because he’s such a buffoon but like that completely takes all the point of of descendants and what’s his what’s the word I’m looking for Taco Taco anywhere like the scent doesn’t even matter anymore because it will
because maybe it’s what I want to see every Twitter thread ever that I can see the confusion and the fear and the frustration that used to be ours is now being handed over to the dump humping redneck fuckfaces
and they don’t have the attention span we have and their 2018 about like they’re confused Southern Idaho.
I like like like this is because because a lot of the Trump thing is like it’s not fucking like we got in that I just did it but I’m like punching down and fucking like like like like like like fucking like labor it out but but like there’s a big part of that movement is exploitation of those people by people that are like fucking Prophet except but it but all of those people across the board all of that meaning and bleeding and all that shit like that was like Snickers bar energy compared to like the energy you have from eating a turkey leg legs if they can’t to last and they’re like confused like they just keep going yeah but emails and you keep going to she lost back to talking about how he’s a dumb fuck that can’t spell and should be thrown in a hole with sharp sticks on the bottom
beautiful butterfly
I’m just I’m just a dumb fucking idiot that just wants to cause trouble ever heard your first hundred days in office and you just got a bunch of people just flying at you like cats like running any rumor they can stop at nothing to just ruin everything
how are always going to be here when there was a particular cotton candy that you can’t throw a dart that will stick in it because it doesn’t exist is I need a concept that you can’t actually mail them on anything because he doesn’t give a fuck about accuracy or truth is like 80 cartoons things a day that he’s like Scrooge McDuck so you’re like you’re like hey like when you can just look at that crazy fucking horrible John said he’s taking everyone starts talking about something he want a fucking obsess about it and start melting down on Twitter
see what you do with it is not politics not campaign simply talked about how he looks just call him a chubby chubby pants I didn’t fucking blow his brains out he’s so vain I think you should do that because you because when you talk about how people dress and how they look like eights it carries weight leg light
because it’s in your essence because people would like you to say that they dress well I like that shirt you wear
and I think and I think that you know I think Nabisco should say he’s not crunchy enough I don’t think that if our our our emphasis on how things get done and whether something is going to work and whether or not a bratty kid just wants your attention and therefore you should think counter-intuitively like the only Silver Lining of this defeat and the situation where it is that we don’t have to spend that much brain power on that shit anymore you can just figure it out eventually
put a frog in a bottle in light it and throw it in any general
how to work we got to do the digging the trenches to live in and the caves to hide in but you’re right you could just put that red hat on
we should talk with this dude until he’s up on out-of-office like more than ever before second of two black friends that I have the other one called and said they could not make it I’ve had this conversation where it was like I was like no you’re right dude you don’t have to like I get it like I don’t get it but I get that I don’t get it and I get that that’s like I don’t I don’t I’m not going to be like what are you guys doing but two women and black people and especially not a black women because it’s like the line was towed and all the shit and it’s like you had this is a time as that Chappelle’s catching Us in Allen like the like white people are like having to deal with frustration for the first time in their lives since my friends I unfortunately cannot do
there’s a way to look at like what’s about to happen in a way that doesn’t mess up to get you down it’s kind of interesting cuz if you’re restoring it’s one of the most interesting things to ever happen so like if you don’t become an activist there’s still something interesting about being about paying attention to what’s happening you know nobody sitting on the sidelines of an activist it’s still a crazy fucking time to witness with a potential healthy result because it is you know like bipartisan system is full of shit and it’s like I don’t know it’s like Keith Olbermann do the thing the other day where he was like yo would you trade like that we could all just vote for Mitt Romney like search yourself up like I’m craving the bipartisan system Comfort until we can figure out how to fix it this is not fixing it and it ended like like I have to that’s making me wreck

that all my Anarchist bullshit about like all the system is stupid what about to choose between Coke and Pepsi well because corn syrup isn’t human urine it’s bad for you but it’s not it’s not human urine bad for you that’s a bad example human urine is actually better for you than corn syrup because it contains water and probably human nutrients and delicious and Tom comedy people have boobs like it do you have to have conversations where you tally likes I’m trying to figure out what I want to talk about the kemetic aspect of an industry where it becomes like kind of where your pocket you have to talk about shit that’s not coming from
you can just following your bliss every time someone moves to write something or is there some kind of like restraint or guidance being put out of what I was trying to get it before there’s a lot of restraint yeah I mean for Bliss to a point where they actually has to be clear and readable so that when your scanning through Facebook or Twitter you’re like I get that conversations like well what’s the joke here and if it’s the last thing then locate let’s come up with a different line that you turned down cuz you have some of your bylines are hilarious and is there anything that you’ve ever been like that’s too fucked up songs of Simon says we’re like What will the opposition do when they get ahold of this sort of thing cuz it’s just a lot of like
see our articles as real as written by real women and obviously they hate women so every article you write as an example of how women are dumb and terrible because we’re satirizing women’s medium article we put out a couple months back if Trump wins I’m moving to Alaska to call to get the writer fired and someone wrote an open letter fired because then we will be all cleaned up for me
but it’s really just about punishing this woman from you should fire her
fired from the Ku Klux Klan
what happened
1000 word blog posts just to articulate the fact that Alaska is in the United States this fictional Rider so if everybody is just dumb now this is just broadening out until like okay and you can’t really tell that is perhaps gyro locally perhaps villain Isley spend it spent its time on top reallocating assets slowly from the future of educating children like like like we’ve been focusing on dumbness like we were at like in a horse since we’re like oh we’re Cowboys and we’re going to we’re going to Russell the doggies of the world and I click who needs to Terror If evolution is real in order for that to happen you just need a lasso and the bomb and like like like like
young comedy people who was who have no choice but to be thinking about a wish for the world that you’re not jaded nihilistic troll people who are just going like fuck you you’re stupid at the world is stupid do you guys like is their goal are we supposed to just make dumb people smart with comedy are we supposed to just like like try to avoid getting shot are we supposed to like shift things so that’s 60 years from now in a world we don’t get to participate in things are better am I overreacting to dumb down our message for them to do it cuz like simplify we need to start to affect my my goal is not to take down Donald Trump and convince them he has a tiny penis like I think is still like shift their focus and be like hey like healthcare
where is good black people deserve to live just like Focus Slow Down slow down
I’ll take it one step at a time if I’m if I’m like if I’m a satirical journalist and I’m like I want to do a like because there’s a you can see it misfiring a lot people think that’s a tire means a lot of times just pretty much not ironic kind of like sarcasm like was sarcasm sarcasm between that you’re trying to I like there’s an art there’s a real art to like leading people around to an absurd thought that forces them to realize something like black people deserve what you don’t do it by typing an article that says black people don’t deserve Healthcare get it
I’m not again I don’t know why I’m explaining it to you
I guess my question is is there do you have any like like like a fundamental philosophical kind of tip like like where I’m trying to think of an example of it from another field where it’s like if a welder where to say or if I football quarterback where does a follow-through like lake lake lake or somebody laughing and then also like looking hotel with separate the Craftsman from the from the from the craftspeople obvious saying it out loud but that your headline actually says what you are trying to say like if you’re like okay what’s the joke of this piece
this is this is this and if that’s not actually reflected in the headline then like you wouldn’t believe how many times that happens this is an example or clarify more cuz I’m not sure if you’re sorry just opened up Pandora’s Box and it’s when the headline is super funny it’s a joke but it doesn’t relate to any of the article the article can’t back it up so you sort of lose steam so do you mean that have that kind of a capsule into the whole bit right there right or do you think you might have been saying like actually that the height headline shouldn’t even be ironic
I don’t know I mean like very leave basically like what you’re agreeing to click on is what you’re going to get in that article unlike a lot of mainstream journalism which currently has a product that are you writing and hoping that tire is not for everybody and people don’t know if it’ll act like you’re joking when you say I’m moving to Alaska that that that that’s that’s the whole joke is in the headline there like that that’s all there are you writing for what percent are you hoping that stupid people bite on that and right crazy blog posts and are inflamed by that or are you hoping that everybody gets a joke and it’s hilarious across the board for the Dum Dum change anyone’s mind
guilt and shame though well-intentioned liberals who are not actually fixing the problem and answer will do things like these have all of San Francisco these headlines about black lives matter are breaking my heart as I scrolled passed them a lot of them are like hey white women you’re not helping you know I read write or like I can’t believe this country is so racist says employee of all white startup like I mean like when was it
you know talking about like a big rich white man because I think like anyone in this room can like pointed specificity makes us all turn inward and look at ourselves a little bit more and I’ll have a little side of us
that guy is just not profitable
I have one every night
when you guys when you guys do encounter that thing where it’s like somebody even as individuals or as reductress but but like I know if you accidentally snared somebody like with your legs just doing something there’s a ironic and somebody does go like that makes you feel bad doesn’t it not to leave you but it makes me feel bad like I feel like I stopped up or something sometimes it’s like to true for people in your like I don’t know it like I did I want to hurt this person are you pick on me you know I dumb
I can’t feel that way sometimes I feel like I feel like I feel like we’ve come as close as soon as we’ve ever come in this last election we’re like like like a lot of people are saying like like oh well in a world where we supposed to go. Shame for not being a society’s ideal of beautiful that some people are saying this is not my speech about we ignored the Rust Belt I have fuck it fuck them I’m from Wisconsin fuck that part of me that I’ve had conversations with what who I thought were smart friends of mine that that like we’re like yeah Channel that’s filled with like little rats and bits of newspaper and but there’s like this fundamental almost should grinning honesty about how it’s an anti-intellectual Revel
that that that all of this like that shaming people about punctuation and not understanding the world and things like that that that that’s like what is my point is it’s only that’s only an observation it’s not about it we didn’t do fucking shit wrong we’re good people I’m not saying that at all that’s not my thesis I just like that we’ve come as far as we ever have in our life of a group of Americans saying like I’ve been feeling dumb cuz I’m dumb for a long time and I was just hoping maybe dumb people could be in control dressed that up when Bush way with the bush they may be used to dress that up and that they’re getting closer and closer to his going dumb the Trump election is kind of similar to Insane Clown Posse followers the Juggalos
where they’ve created this community that basically exist to say fuck you to anything that would say fuck you to my community and so in doing in so doing the kind of created this arm or where it’s like anything can be used to then justify their own their own means because their whole premise was just out of anger and resentment of you know that we have in greater numbers that meant for but other things that are often dismissed and don’t have electrical power because they’re City Slickers like folded over on themselves eight times which is the maximum and so they’re all in contact with each other in a big sandwich so even if they do have a low IQ they have they have they have a snobbishness to them when it comes to what you say to an Indian man when you meet him at the day
you’re in these other states where the electrical power is so high and the positive way of looking at it isn’t so much like oh they’re trying to take over there they wish that the whole country was it was it was a cattle ranch or a or a or a welding welding
weird like we’re on the Eightfold and they’re like
Because the Internet full did them so they’re having their first experiences with with like with things that you learn if you like if you go to college in a big city from the Midwest to the next to the nearest big city and you as You Follow that path if I could just show you a Albert Brooks Defending Your Life Montage of of how dumb I’ve been at the dumb things are like like like like it had it didn’t stop 5 minutes ago on the green or am I just like a big meeting you guys was babbling on like try to prove a good person is like me to imagine like the shame of being a just a dumb shit just a big dumb shit bucket eating fucking moron
from a fucking town full of 800 fucking fucking idiot the whole bucket
there’s a shame that I think I’d exchange like our biggest problem like I said it’s white fragility and male fertility in a nutshell cuz it’s like the experience a tiny fraction of that pain they’re like oh I hurt someone the part that I just heard was the thing you guys always do well you’re telling me that it hurts you
you do kills us and then they’re like that hurts our feelings for you to say that but
that’s a little bit bigger every relationship where we’re because I just had one tonight was like I didn’t have a fight with my girlfriend but we had a thing like we love each other so much that any turbulence causes a conversation of you like if someone were to express a need if someone were to say oh I’m just satisfied in this area if I hear that unless I’m fucking on point and sober and ready for anything and it just finished breathing for time taken for a second and then a big mouthful of peanut butter and I got to go with my ID and a hammock go to bound to hear your dissatisfaction as I fucked up I fucked up like it’s easy to look back on it after your autonomic
my cools down we always look back at that person told me I fucked up like wow they must really give a fuck to tell me that and also my ability to say I fucked up is actually like a pretty cool sexy Alpha like like like like but in that moment you’re like I’m always like like I didn’t fuck up I didn’t fuck up you should know what we’re okay maybe I did fuk up but that definitely pales in comparison to your fuk up so I was trying to scramble and it’s a panic that is equivalent to when your drowning is fight or flight
at the heart of it at the heart of it all is like you’re like a war movie about hurting people and there’s not a ton of like how my shoes hurt the fuck you saying that they’re like not hearing them and not looking at them as humans and there’s like there is a place you can get to wear hatred and and privilege and all of the things that were struggling with a get to a place where it’s like holy shit is really bad and right now for it to be in a place of people freaking out all the time like like like like that the fact that the internet is a goddamn fucking like Cesspool is because like we’re like we’re getting hurt by each other and half of us were 20% of us or whatever getting hurt by the idea that we’ve been doing it wrong the whole time
and we really want to prove it to them but it’s like I just wanted you to know I was like is that you didn’t mean to his travel trailer yeah I’m just trying to tell you to stop doing it and it’s hard because every human being shares this I think Prime at a logical there is a serf curl or a wind that gets in your sail the moment when you it’s self-righteousness or just not even self-righteous is that sounds pejorative righteousness will you truly are right it’s not fabricated that you are right like that’s when we a lot of us break down by heroes are people the people have changed me
are people who have been right and have taken mercy on me and then like hey man like like you should know you’re wrong and I’m right but like the thing is like, somehow lower its I don’t know ever even know how they did it but like I’ve had these experiences around like I would have just argue about this shit in like been this way if it weren’t for this one person this Anonymous person on Twitter or some some some flame or that was like it’s not 11 everybody dangerous mechanism in all of us that we I think when we feel when we feel correct when we feel right we
there’s like a Newtonian laws are that like Puffs us up more and then and then scrape the syndrome because when when you feel wrong you have a you have a defensive reaction and then when you feel right you have an aggressive reaction maybe that’s be describing then I don’t think so though I have a theory now that we are our coping mechanism going forward is like a spider fly so it in certain situations because we’re like Pikachu out of household but you should just grab one hundred percent of households even if you think you lived in a Beaver Cleaver like household to think you’re a kid so it’s chaotic I do think it’s like you have these like tyrants who are going to say because I said so and they’re going to be like and I think the moments that we that dopamine Spike us an evolved us are the moments we stand up to them and prove them wrong
I didn’t learn learn that the more I could roll over the more freedom I got at all like my curfews got extended by fucking monologues leg like like my my my posture improved every like all my leveling up would had to do with like the moment I finally lost my shit and fucken like prove someone wrong emulating what they the weapons they would use against me which were like yelling and shaming and talks of buying us stuff that’s the that’s the I guess that’s what we’re up against is because our whole species is descended from a one big dysfunctional family that was reproductively successful like we don’t give yourself enough credit biologically for being that grew up in God’s crosshairs and yet beat the fuck out of giraffes and ants
we are going to the fucking outer space and and and and if you were a good giraffe you can come with we’ll think about it
it was not a good solution to grow a longer next cuz you couldn’t reach leaves dumb you thought you nailed it you would have fucking eaten this if you would have evolved past that you would have fucking eating us we’re eating you you don’t even taste good you just got your own neck
and you can’t talk for their next can’t talk you hate you hate your ass so much maybe I should add some lyrics has so I can save anyone have any ideas about how to build a lab
my point is we didn’t earn this company of one don’t interrupt me and irritates me
we we didn’t learn any of this but it also is recognized it was over like like as a species we fucking like we we are the biggest success on the planet until you get to the part where were so successful that the planet and then fail but like as individual human beings then we don’t fuck I had it I fucking had it I had the meaning of lights right in my fucking hands
God damn it I whip my tail back if we’re so successful
we lost him cuz we get so big and fat cuz we’re like fucking nailing it we used to be like squirrels and made if you just if you back us up all the way to assuming we all came from one amoeba we represent the part of that amoebas family that was like peace like we’re awesome siblings are like amoeba shirt and we were like I think I’ll be a fucking monkey think you’re better than me now we see if I can grab grab on the shit with your foot your cousins becoming nuclear-capable
toe thumb
I’ve got to a point where we can upload our Consciousness into a simulation of having two thumbs but I just got a couple more a little conniption fits to get through. I really I swear to God I had a fucking point I was going to stitch the drafting to the fight to a thing it was going to blow your mind you’re mad because I know that it was hard about something that it was like like that I got off of the sting out of a thousand times but I was like all right
you going to eat your fucking worried about you rap
you’re a gladiator big that they have a shot where you can see search giraffes like being like loaded into the coliseum’s loading back but they don’t have the scene where they were like holyshit please monsters with live next week we should have eight of them fight Doug
I dug would be like are you fucking kidding me
I’m not a horse for God’s sake I got a long neck and we’re like we have bronze you’re dead and it’s not fair to you talk about you know you don’t want to fight you don’t want to fight a zebra a zebra if I can get you
I would want to be in a ring with it with a giraffe even the even with the sword I was I would like that he’s going to walk on your face I don’t know what do you want to be in a ring with a sword with a crocodile. If you would send a female feminist parody News News website editors why would I say that if I go back in time if I could be in a ring with anybody and it was an actual sword Nero who used to make it people fight him was fake swords
what is a sex robot
just just because
address to make it cry
I would do it just for that I’m glad you’re back I can barely sit between my legs ease the seed bag on the seat back on a tractor and it sounds better when I figured out that it wasn’t the case I thought the phrase blow your wad was exclusively sexual and was so grossed out that mainstream media would just use it that like
Edward go like
and then I realize I always like a wad of cash
I I did how are people saying blow your wad all the time so gross it’s like Pearl Jam and he learned what Pearl Jam as in you’re like oh stop it what do you eat to hear your name all the time but I I know it’s a way of referring to your fucking gross pearly come to an actual thing
they don’t like it
it’s all bad
going to comedy show like that
I really baby I projected that did I come up with the name for come and I’d make it Pearl Jam’s call gue Pearl Jam if you’re listening you’re you’re off the hook
that sounds like something to just send interviews in the 90s
oh okay so it’s all right you’re right they made that up so they could explain their name in interviews
yeah I also like the Beatles Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds
what does Limp Bizkit mean
when one person cancer golf in the Olympics
what is the new world in that Kimberly and journal journey is a bunch of people jerking off and a biscuit and I had to make up a phrase for when that fails yeah it seems like if everybody successful
but you’re saying that the guy that can’t keep it up
he’s a winner there are no winners
I guess he’s going to eat the biscuit punches you in the mouth do you know you’re about to get into a fight now.
so fucking embarrassed or Smash Mouth Joseph
you can hold me forever to faithfully and just
is that what what’s Faithfully how do I not know a journey Saga Missouri
pretty sure that’s when you poop on somebody’s chest
so are you going to forgive my ignorance but are you guys out here because just because you’re awesome or are you also may be moving to Farrell audio with a podcast on Keegan check out our pots are podcast melts time and if you’re in town tomorrow we have a show at The Comedy Store at 8 p.m.
what was the podcast called
I mean everything is is time we stopped denying everything is right because otherwise I’ll never become president
what was what is mass time about what’s angel on mountain
it was kind of inspired by a particular women’s magazine podcast of the editors of reductress in the world of reductress of entertainment killer picture of your butt is it usually in studio with not with an audience
we got a couple Life podcast will usually record in the office I just want to feel then after and then so you’ll be unfair Eladio after that and that’s easy enough to just look up let me see did you know that the hadd is just They just added it and where is this members only jacket I heard so much about from the future
I think I killed left he moved Lucas Lucas that you have a gift bag for Dan and Spencer I see I knew you were such a good sport I listen to that by the way I was as much as we were self-effacing about how we were just mocking you for your height I listen backyard is like holy I mentioned I was a painter when I was on and I posted you and Spencer of that’s awesome
I mean are you is it okay if I fail at the old one in there for Spencer to awesome thanks so much no problem I missed you last night I was gone yeah
I didn’t have one for Jeff that’s okay next time video games video games play with them candy jelly jelly Saga Lee correct Thunder stores in between the words spelled with a K which is a sign at Lucas of the K crazy have you seen standing right in front of you guys
Dennis asking me questions and
say what you want
positive if you want to take paintings is your life going to make your life a serialized well Christmas ended so I don’t have a job anymore because of the course of the Santa’s such a tall character are you there for grinchmas and I can see where is platform shoes on the same height as me but you’d be eleven feet tall was the best game in the world cuz you get to wear a suit and a mask and nobody nobody knows who you are
you don’t you’re not like Stephen Merchant I don’t have my finger on the pulse of the people I don’t know who the hell right now you’re giving reductress the best lap dances I know right it’s so still I’m sorry
I like smell bad I’m just like well
it’s nicer when it’s their idea to sit down and makes me feel more comfortable I feel like I don’t want to thank you great company what have you been up to Brandon man I’m just I got these bootlegs of his podcast on Pharaoh so if you guys want to get that shit then I’m selling that after this show are you doing I’m not doing the character name of the character which is the real
African Catholic mass in St Louis you live in Greasy to call St Louis
oh cuz it had a real a real greasy Jack Hall in St Louis of all place and it’s a Catholic University greasy dick hazy dick Hall how do you spell r e i s d i c h e r a n d o n
never asked me what I’m up to
looking for a cheap Vape
hey so I will literally change the pitch of my voice
that’s awesome
call my cell phone.
Do you have any do any do any white people have white friends that when they talk to any black person like they uncontrollably affect a little slightly like kind of like urban legend

I always I always act like I have social anxiety, Christina I’m hearing you I agree with you I want to be on good terms with you because if you start the hard-r me when I’m like chilling with you but I’m like
Miracle officer we were talking about
I think it’s a good thing maybe I think it’s been trying to reach out and they’re on a freaking America
cooking Papa
yeah yeah yeah I try to be I don’t try to be someone I just talk like this
talk like a woman and I talked to her but I’m not changing for you I’m just showing you all I can do is break your body down to the ground is so soft and so Jordan Court
where is a house yo his Dick Powell
big fat pussy crap
he’ll invade your pussy like you are Rome and we’ll take the Visigoths but yeah I’ll take you back to 300 BC motherfuker
I think we probably shouldn’t have a phobia of finishing a show before 10 p.m. we should probably at those moments we should be like I’m sorry ladies about that last I don’t know if it has it occurred to me if you never heard the show before you be like are they doing this to like go to mandatory it’s warm mandatory y’all heard of salt and pepper this is turmeric and ginger
I’m so spicy I wish you to me up with his dick hit me up more like I’m very very nicely because I come in and check your mom 10th but it’s got semen all over it because God knows what I’ve been doing
piston lunch Alabama
you are a saint
nobody wants to restyle to this shit but I guess I’m going to have to do it because it is
I have to say I want to wash it like a car it’s going to cost me a lot of money like a cam he’s a Toyota Camry a very good car doesn’t take me very far but it’s reliable
I need I need someone to wipe down my dick after I drop my Pearl Jam e
girl can I get your camera unreliable
I got upset my Blue Book rating pretty high resale value is pretty pretty good
lease to own
Sammy dick
Panaderia I’m going to put a big limb condom over your test left cuz that’s the only way that I’ll get you pregnant
what should I use when I get like I’m not going to put a tarp on it because it’s like a kid supposed to stop in it supposed to collect mud and dirt because that’s when a car is worth something up, you driving
I’ve got to make your money if you’re giving to hysteria but I don’t care cuz I’m excited nothing I got a I got a boner and my car is my boner
yeah yeah
so heavy heavy years in my deck
Yelp Front Street great
grasp it hurts my feelings
I need free to show it to women
emphysema shaping deck everybody
alright DJ Camry what are we doing just fine if it’s that was a is there a have to be improvised D&D and we have two doing role playing Legos make this official business like what we need to figure out like an what should we do should we do Shadow run again or should we find a new thing that’s technically whatever you guys want man has got kind of confused because we would play it characters and sometimes none of them are here and we would never remember what the hell was going on so we’re talking about going back to kind of the old days of like Sharpie and Cork & Spencer where is a segment were the three of us
little RPGs drunk so we have no idea what’s going on but we have a little legal may be trouble with because of harmonquest if it’s just if it’s not it’s an excellent point actually I like your babies being sarcastic is weird weird but also don’t want to say weird because weird could have positive connotations like dum dum to yell that out
big dicks about it I mean only one thing
boxed wine
please take her box of wine away
dumb Danielle that out but weird to defend it. Which is which is a positive
I like yeah she’s she’s right you don’t think I just weird, but she keeps talking to him that way
he comes home every day of frustration is like yelling out Electric Boogaloo
yeah yeah yeah I love you
eat the face I want to eat the Seoul
Florida to Los Angeles that’s why we moved here yeah
don’t even try my heart is dead
I paid my rent this month
your favorite get on board
love I come with my beard and I might helping you build shit and I’m like I don’t get it to tell me you explain slavery to me I don’t get it I don’t get it
we’re going to get you out of here you would certainly be the slave
statue although I do feel sick my month I remember my mom’s house
just because I take to ownership well doesn’t mean that I have like like that’s different
but I do feel like there was a constant thing when I was growing up in Milwaukee where there was there were people that would call our house like cold calling around up family reunions and there would always be this Awkward Moment where the person calling would be like yes the Harmon family is getting together in the park and my mama going to forgive me for asking but are you whites and we aren’t and then my mama get off the phone
I think someone in your family own slaves. We should go to that nice black families party
beet juice
call disinvited us if the guy was like very little like you’re not invited
do you have
we party with everybody
job the blacks weeds
are you fucking pissed that I showed up for the free food I’m not stupid to our barbecue
we should have gone I didn’t have a say in that family I would have gone. I should have I should have said you made that made change you could have stood up here let’s go party with black people I didn’t do it I had not too late
so long
show me no familial love Dan am I still your favorite
what up now it’s okay it’s it’s it’s hard it’s like a thing that you learned it’s like do you have blades on your feet and it’s slippery out there I’ve done both of these things and you just go out and it just like that
are they are the only people that get through are people short so blind drunk that they’re just like
we welcome them all and we want them all to come up on stage and and and and stuff but then there’s this is Jerry Springer a fact and then crack the crack the whip
like a ringmaster
ring master
I’m waiting for don’t you think you should just be hanging out I don’t get it
you know what I’m going to talk to a guy is going to talk to a guy I think I could get you signed with an agency that get you out of this. Of this is southern area
I’m from Sweden I don’t know what’s going on I just produced the movie white man trying to do a good thing
all right well so what happened
Brett Franson
that’s where we loosen the reins enough for the void it to two to choose in and teaches that there’s a reason why some of us are elitist and in the confines of a studio or you guys don’t have to deal with it
oh yeah
have you guys ever said when you do it when you do your life show do you ever how loose are the elusive the grip on people like chiming in and do you guys like what what are you feeling there with your philosophy 11 times in at all actually I don’t know I mean like our hosts are nuts so they kind of just like create our own crazy
it was verified from one of our a producer Kevin that the woman that I jokingly said I did not know this I said she was drinking boxed wine apparently the only is that true
she’s taking the bag out of the boxes drinking out of a bag
how do we how do we end the show how do we end a show how does anyone ever end a show I’ve never learned I try that’s why I know he’s coming in boxes
thank you thank you thank you thank you
Rachel Maddow
I feel about Keith Overman do they want it cuz I feel like he’s not as popular as he should be like I love that he’s like sitting in a basement just like fucking calling out and just going like that everyone’s not like Keith Olbermann Is My Jam where does it is never going to forgive you for support
is that what really cool
cuz I acted like I looked at his Wikipedia I was expecting to see like oh he you know I don’t know something that was like that dirty to him just enough that he’s like just sitting alone going like letting everybody was because he donated while he was working on his thing he donated $2,400 to each of three Democratic party and then it was a technical infraction so you took a suspension and then after the suspension they just didn’t read negotiate a contract and nobody really knows this is all is Wikipedia that I went there to going like I fully expected to hear that you like hit a kid with a car
he has his major failure that is not an intelligent lesbian I think that’s really what is lacking I watch The Rachel Maddow Rachel Maddow is doing and she looks at the camera and just does like like extended stand-up bits or her I have room in my life for both of them I got when I said that I just said. What are the other like I had any he looks like Sam the Eagle soars I would think that I would think that he would have like a hard core demographic that would be like I’m I’m ashamed enough of my straight white male like Althea whatever Alpha Beta this thing that I I want I want to be ashamed of it but at the same time he’s just like this like he cuts that silhouette to like him cuz he’s going like
Keith Olbermann likely he’s like he’s like sitting in a basement somewhere hyper verbose like the hyperbolic like the sky is falling in the end and his Twitter Avatar has him wrapped in a flag like Daniel Day-Lewis Gangs of New York and like fucking want to marry him do you like them he’s he should do what he should do a show with Sandy going that’s my guess.
I only I only trust him and use it when I got I got in the car and I said what do you think of Keith Olbermann you’re like he’s fine and I was like I’m not going to be like now what do I do I’m just going to do Thai food across the street before the show with my girlfriend this is my fortune fortune cookies look like drop the ball be really bummed out
can a person standing at the Den read this out loud I got two Fortunes in a row that were blank and that is essentially terrified in my fortune cookie and I wanted to punch Confucius in the dick this is some CBS bulshit your fortune is as sweet as a cookie are you fucking kidding me I was physically upset that made me physically upset like I thought that maybe they changed it from Fortunes in to advise cookies because they’re trying to avoid litigation so they would just feel like they used to say like or like like like you’re going to miss somebody. And like maybe they like pulled back because people were like suing them or not
yellow hat is going to give you Curious George
forever for this. I hate people in a yellow hat
whether it be and then it just became like you’d open your fortune cookie and it would be like it’s better to be good than to be nice or something like I don’t care what you think about how to run your life
I want to know what’s going to happen with the tapestry of Fate you guys can Chinese cooking I broke the cookie I did my job you have to live up to your end of the fire drills in the fuck up telephone
flipper reductions on Farrell audio or not it’s not going to be popular.
Brandon Johnson
Lucas Romero gif
call Jeff Davis
thank you so much


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