Episode: 76 – Hug Me, Hug Me, Hug Me

Episode

Episode: 76 – Hug Me, Hug Me, Hug Me

Description

The room is packed with Communicon fans and two of them are asked by Mayor Harmon to come on stage and discuss a recent internet exchange about why they feel Dan should “stop talking.” A lengthy game of D&D then ensues.

Transcript

Hollywood California in meltdown, thank you so much for coming
we’ve been off for a week and we have a very large cash and I pray exciting apartment town
thank you
thank you thank you probably especially for some of you I think some people are probably here out of town for communicate
that’s what this is all about people here a lot of people are here communicating with their second second year of having their Community convention over at the Embassy Suites in Glendale
I’m already at 6 p.m.
you think do you think that you guys are on Pace for six seasons as much as we were busy and don’t you think that looks like it has been on the chopping block since it’s the first episode airs or you can die at any time like I sent you just kind of embrace it it’s the show represents the Human Condition that’s it is it is kind of weird like mudskipper of a show because it yourself of the mind of like Donald Glover’s incredibly talented ring his soldiers died in to that show like I don’t I definitely know that he did not leave because he thought I’m going to go make a bunch of money but a kid like Donald has Donald was and for the amount of work that
did on that show 15 years earlier like like can you imagine like he would have lacked the set of community at the end of an episode taping season 2 to the parking lot just want to let you know I mean it’s change the climate changed and I don’t know I mean Community like to make it a deer season is fucking hard and to make it into your 50 now you just do it crawling on your belly over glass now you just do it like you make it to the end of the fifth season and at the end of it people are just going to welcome
I’m corny but really before 9:11 like the new show
characterizes cording
fashion Chestnut
time will I get was a thing called holding the network or I or a studio and also like when like he got picked up in a second season of all the cast walked out and they all had brand new Porsche has like you say do do do any shows get that just like Big Bang Theory get the cars I’m sure Big Bang Theory gets hot yeah I mean that’s an actual profitable like actual things like that like I don’t know you. That I mean you know we should we should have built pretty on is a showrunner for Big Bang Theory and and and and ostensibly my Nemesis but we like each other and I should have him come up here and talk about what it’s like to run Big Bang Theory because I’m constantly cursing it like the Red Baron but would be interesting to know what it’s like to work over there and I know it
God there was a time when I was a kid watching TV there was three networks just three and then there was your local UHF station with some yahoo like Jim Henson doing some weird shit on it because he hit the bricks with a suitcase full of tapes of Kermit the Frog and said can we do this indicated but there was three networks and did those three networks basically cooperated so there was like Battle of the Network stars with Scott Baio fighting the Hulk on a Highwire everything was just a big as a consumer it was like plus the chicks on television that show right on the island you had Mary Tyler Moore
that goes a little kitty cat that has likely been said MTM Mary Tyler Moore like Charlie Chaplin before her like crazy the collective of artists that the her whole goal was to say the creatives we need to be able to swing a heavier dick than these rich people who just paid to do nothing at the same time is Norman Lear of total monopolization there are there was more conscientious is more creative Passion of the part of some of these people that’s the odd thing but but the fragmentation of all this media you would not be able to have a Breaking Bad on network TV in 1980 obviously for obvious reasons because there’s 25 million people watching and possibly if you’re the lowest rating Show Breaking Bad in in 1980s
go on Google TV Jesus Christ big jackass talking about TV I took it the biggest poop you cannot find that on Google
I don’t care you can Google it all you want really take a big poop I was kidding
Jesus like that man a lot of harmontown attendees probably Kid myself I’m sure the only reason we’re here is because they watch Community but at the same time there is a division there’s like a you know there’s harmontown fans and their Community fans there’s a big ol Venn diagram cleavage in the middle but there’s also a separation like a huge Community fan arguably the biggest fan in the world would have a huge reason to be like Dan Harmon fuck that guy every once in a while I open my mouth and I say something in the sub-continent of us comment section on Reddit like for instance I care about my show and I think it’s stupid when people tell me it sucks and they can eat poop and fuck off and die like an end and here’s how that makes me feel because I’m a human being and has a heartbeat and is going to die one day and doesn’t want to go to my God live
everything’s fine in that than that subreddit and it seems perfectly fine and then someone goes like this in my dumbass block I could get like a million pennies
and then it gets out of control the end result is always that there’s a lot of community fans I think and I know cuz I see on Twitter they literally will go she needs to stop talking
what percentage of the of the of the feedback is that I don’t know what his Twitter represent what is the humidity fan syrup is that strip do you miss going a huge family gathering Viking soul food do you miss meeting the parents so I can get out well actually, this is that but you can still do all of these things with me Desmond Thorne on my podcast adventures in Black Cinema each week I take you on a journey through a new black film how it relates to the culture and sometimes have the themes related my own life so there’s always a little teeny the flight that is an embarrassment and of course as a filmmaker myself and one of the blackest Phil nerdiest film nerves like ever you’re always in good hands
adventures in Blacksburg, but Desmond Thorne executive-produced by Amanda seales new episodes every Tuesday on all major podcast platforms
is our is our top Community fan is like that was a quote from from from I can’t pronounce her Twitter name is she here
quickest route to stop talking lady is here he needs to stop talking
why would you come to the shop
that’s all it is that’s what I was would you be willing to come up and talk about how I shouldn’t
so you going to have the conversation is it going to be on stage
yeah you going to take grab one of those we talked about this very contentious right now
she’s got arms akimbo like as if I can find a fight about to break out
okay yes
can you come up and explain
what is going on
and by the way can we start doing the show in the round because it’d be so much easier just to have the surrounded by people to access to the stage you be so much simpler cuz now the whole show of people just storming the stage like a bad deal
I was not invited up so late
I did not create a show you do not get to tell me to stop talking
all right so what do I do when I first Robin to her Batman I’m Catherine I guess I can thank you and you guys were principally cheated
all right so what the concept okay why do I need to stop talking
in three words or less
you literally did
sorry I should I eat my Mike Futurama in the contest
yeah I talked to Mike and up reflecting poorly on you
I really didn’t think that you would go so far as to have me off here but so I’m glad I’m glad to have such as punishment I don’t know if you don’t like feeling like you’re under attack so I don’t particularly like it myself either
damn if she doesn’t stay up here I will stay up here and defend her from this concept to understand why I would want you to come up here so we can have it out so that we can be an honest ground whether they love Community hate Community don’t give a shit about Community love me hate me we can all go home tonight and go to fucking sleep and wake up in an honest World why should I stop talking it is great and I love that you care and I think you’re brilliant and I think that the show is obviously wonderful I’ll be here I’ve spent all the money to get here when I read the comments said I’m not the only person who said this Stan is that not that you should stop talking but you let them beat you to the point where it distracts people from wanting to enjoy the show and you found people who don’t know you people who don’t know that this is your persona or the who you are and they say who the hell is Dan Harmon I don’t like to see that
and I’m so happy that you’re back I am over-the-moon happy that you were back I wouldn’t put all the time and passion into doing what I do online to get people to watch the show and to love the show if I didn’t care so when I hear you say those things I don’t think you shouldn’t say them and then people said to me you should come and see him a few times to come see him in Harbor Town and see what he’s really like as a person he’s not the quote that was involved I’m going to do that for me to to be defensive and express my pain what was your response with how I should stop talking to you
okay can you turn me in if I don’t like many people do that on Twitter the things that you say can come back and forth just like the things that you say on a subreddit came back and bit you when you respond to it and that’s why I didn’t respond to that and I’m sorry I’m a little bit around and going around and sounded like I don’t quite know what I mean cuz it’s complicated you’re a complicated person I find the whole concept of trying to understand where you’re coming from as a person to be something that I wrestle with but I also tell everyone that I think you’re a total genius and that’s the show wouldn’t be the same without you we all know what season 4 was like not supposed to Whitehurst
what on Earth do you mean by that please tell the court what you mean say anything after the word season 4 say anything
say season 4 I like Arby’s see how they twisted and you didn’t even create the I mean there’s a lot of energy on that topic 8888 stuff sometimes very you like something from the background and there’s two different things here there’s Dan Harmon there’s a guy and then there’s the show the Dam created and do you feel that you like down a little bit less than you like the show you you were that Dan had the capacity to hurt the thing that you care about which you like you feel like Dan has the capacity to actually be destructive to the thing that you care about more right Community am I getting it wrong
tribal is Paul Newman make salad dressing and then Paul Newman is in the paper guide
salad dressing sales that is the
I could hurt all salad dressing except it might actually cause a spike in Hidden Valley Ranch yes that’s what I’m saying his his salad dressing would be harmed by him saying something like that so you’re looking at me is like a Colonel Sanders or like a Ronald McDonald which I am like in relation to community because this article Safe Community Creator lashes out at what happens to them thinks it’s hilarious
do you think you should watch it on Thursday….. That’s what those headlines do enter as a fan you’re like I get that 1.2 up to 1.3 and he’s undermining me Paul Newman salad dressing that’s my best guess at what you’re going through I don’t think I’m thinking that you’re addicted that they don’t want to watch the show me
how do you feel about Dan Harmon individual
I don’t hate you
wow
really, there’s there’s there’s two people in stage one of them does not like being told not to talk that’s me for sure LOL that sounds like that’s also how you feel because Amir reply to your Tweet hurt your feelings
I said something and I responded to it and it hurt your feelings being brought up here feels like an attack you make you feel like a bad person you feel under scrutiny you feel like you’re under a microscope you feel like people want you to be different
can I just have to find out what I’m assuming is a friend of yours is on stage
traffic go ahead and do you have the Conch all right Dan
let me talk when you take them like that let me talk.
I mean to. Draw the segment that is almost a lion man to try to get me all right we worked our butts off on Twitter for season 4 season 5 season 6 this girl and night with Mike in Canada to get season 5 I don’t want her to get pissed off and quit right now there’s a reality okay I love you I’m just saying it I need to stand up for you right now the other thing is okay as a Navy Club member on that hundred sixty thousand, we love you and we want you to come hang out with us and it’s a sad okay you can go to read it and be nice to attack a community fan leader and then you’re going to go and like Shawn the AV club I’m just personally like go to the people who love you and come back and be like okay what on Earth instead of just coming back hard cuz we do love you so much but there’s so much backstory
stuff to this that’s so confusing two people though that’s what I’m saying when I wake up in the morning here’s what I do I wake up and I go as Dan Harmon I am going to think things they’re going to drop down out of my brain by gravity and come out of my mouth some of the stuff is going to go through my fingers cuz I won’t have time to say everything and end up being a TV show if I’m lucky I’ve been doing that for forty years and counting so that’s how I operate every given day and then this wonderful thing called the internet which doesn’t demand eye contact from me like I get to go in and I love going in I was born on the internet I go in at somebody says to me what does it feel like to write that show and I go you know what sometimes it feels like a penguin fucking a moose and only recently like it’s worth money
to printed a headline that says like Community Creator says penguins fuck Moose’s that’s an issue that we are experiencing all of us and when we experience it like we all have it it’s a bummer for me but here’s how I handle it I go fuck that sucks and you go fuck that sucks and you go that’s that sucks we all go to bed but I don’t say to anybody even defamer vulture anybody I never say someone’s got to stop doing something that they’ve been doing I go to bed I wake up and I keep doing it and I experienced pain because of it just like I did at the playground just like all the characters in community that you are constantly being punished for who they are the outside world closes in on you as you express your Humanity it’s it’s an important theme of the show and it’s run by a psychopath
is run by somebody who just goes by and I’m bummed out I’m a little baby a little poopy pants baby about the idea of being told to shut up and what I should and shouldn’t do like a it’s like a big issue with me and and and I didn’t like go off on you or anyting I tweeted back at you like a defensive like blowing over do I get to do I get to jump start I didn’t mean to cut you off look back at me and I talk to my friends most of them were here tonight who all said he’s not trying to hurt anyone he’s hurting himself maybe you should think twice about what you said maybe you should go to harmontown see what he’s really like came to see from that thinking I can see why he’s such a
powerful figure in why people like him so much it’s interesting to hear you talk I was hearing those sound bites out of vulture like that you’re complaining about and I responded it thinking you’re the man who makes it so there’s a show I really want to succeed and CeCe 16 Season 5 I’d like to see more I wish he would stop talking because it just makes him look bad and I don’t want you to look bad so it’s not that bad and it’s that puts me stupid or I’m attacking you or I don’t even know exactly what we’re getting out right now because I never ever ever call you stupid for throwing a little bit because I know it’s tough up here yes and I watch the Sarah Silverman program I got fired from that
I get fired from every job I had Milwaukee I just thought you caught me at a normal time in my life
I have been getting fired my entire life everybody that I work for eventually goes that I like the Sarasota it’s a bummer to me I wish that I could be who I was and constantly get promoted
I know it’d be great if people get me cakes all the time instead of firing me I guess but the truth is the way that they respond to who I am as they fire me and all but at the same time like I like my life like I like I like I like the way things are going I got a hybrid I got it I got it I got a Goldendoodle I got a redhead girlfriend just going to get that order
but the thing that we’re talking about this is why I wanted to bring you up and you’re like me as soon as somebody is like talking about what you’re saying you know lately like I am feeling what you’re feeling when we come up here and talk about this late like like that that’s why here’s the thing that I have found that I have found when the autonomic response holy face down when we talked about it for 10 minutes longer than people usually talk about it and the show does everything 10 minutes longer their Miracle starts to happen when I get my MySpace block existed why everything that I’ve ever done that has gotten me in trouble exist why there’s a letter online that I wrote to an 8 year old kid about Steven Spielberg being a fact because I didn’t like me
after house enough why there why it why it why I’m famous before that for saying that my Kung Fu Panda Stockton it all the shit like every fucking job I’ve ever worked out there’s always is always like this thing that comes out that I go like that gets me in trouble but another thing that has always happened like when I when I first came out to LA I want I was working for Ben Stiller and I was just happenstance also working for this famous guy but still we were going to a party at our place in Koreatown and I was going to invite him over and Rob should have said you know you should probably leave a funny message message machine bread machines back. I practiced a funny message and I kind of
couple times and I dialed his number and I I left I tried to leave a funny message on his machine a kind of fucked it up and I had to call back and because I forgot to leave my contact info and it was a horrible experience that I walked away from his with Chrissy never showed up for the party I had so much Shame about it locked down in my body that three years later I would open my refrigerator to make a sandwich in the privacy of my own home and the color of the mustard bottle would somehow remind me of the time I left a fucking shity funny message on Ben Stiller’s voice and and and I and I there was a Tipping Point where I said I got a I got to stop making this my problem and I went over to my computer and I typed up the story of how I left the funny message in Google Ben Stiller’s a answering machine and I click submit on it and it was a blog entry there was no guarantee that he was going to read it was just a message in a bottle that I went down to the ocean and it was gone he was out of my heart
and everybody in this room every one of those planets walking around all the shit that we do that is shameful that we have sexual perversions and we we collect down and we bottle them up and I don’t think it’s a good idea for everybody to barf them onto each other but I know that I would go insane and then I would be at toxic horrible Portuguese Man O’War half-dead on the beach TMZ headlines Dan Harmon lashes out at the Portuguese
and I would be filled with toxicity if I didn’t like the weird thing about putting out as it doesn’t poison other people that turns into, date it turns into things that they can feel a lot of people basically just say is that dumb fat piece of shit petty ass hole to get up there and be honest about being a big fucking dumb shit head wasn’t doing something so wrong my whole life and so I I do that stuff and I’m going to keep doing it I keep defensive about the idea of being like I feel that pressure Community was a new chapter in my life it was this plot point that happened to me I stumbled into this job of a being able to actually affect people and being the Colonel Sanders of this of this thing it was like 15 year old girls following me on Twitter and you having to go I can’t tweet about jerking off anymore
I could but it doesn’t feel right. They’re only following me because Joel McHale follows me like I’m a fifteen-year-old girl I do is act like you start to ask yourself who you are what you have a right to say I didn’t only constrict in from there I forgot my point a long time ago but but but that’s where I come from and end end end my point of bringing you up here absolutely not I knew I knew that if I did I knew that there would be my my cheeks. Hot my ears got hot I knew that would happen but I didn’t want it to happen I knew it would have disastrous results probably tomorrow is probably too late to prevent that because there is a juicier story and whatever whatever happened right away but I also knew that something would be resolved that something would go just finish it just be done with it
you guys love a television show so much that the guy that created it is an obstacle and it’s past and I think that’s a beautiful thing but it’s an obstacle is not going to go away
I don’t I’m not killing that applies as it’s going to sound like Dan Harmon brings up a community fan in a dogfight pit and makes them applaud him saying he’s a hero III anticipated everybody in the audience being a communic on a 10d that’s why I won’t that’s why I wanted to talk about this is one of those be more apology and atonement than anything without promising that I’m going to change because I’m not going to I want to just tell me how to explain to you guys that this is this is who I am
so he doesn’t need to stop talking
did you get your mic microphone Lisa there’s no way this conversation so yeah I don’t want you to tell me your feelings feelings feelings not don’t talk about Lisa Lisa what’s for you and you still seem pretty wound up about it like what’s what’s the unresolved issue with me
he’s a microphone, that made you upset and the larger take me to the big city of magma under their does fandom like there’s a my music station with my PR speak for anyone but myself have you said that then like how you feel twice now that I said that and I’ve talked to people about it and they said find out who he really is and now I feel like I really have found out who you are and I’m not going to worry about it anymore you can say whatever you want
Lisa and Katherine everybody think it’s on my toxic
good job
there’s a thing about season 5 to thank you for season 5
so that was healthy for a little bit
alright let’s bring Spencer Crittenden up
hey hey what what
you guys almost passed out
from from boredom or before his all the blood was in my penis
did you get
do you get turned on by Banda Ms shoes or I said the past out thing and then I thought that came out of me like that conversation
yeah
we learn more about you every way so because it was about the show and it’s mirrors for me I think this projection projection projection projection I feel so fucking much I go into any comments section or article about the things that I do and it’s the only right way to be so detached I can’t see myself in that kind of person and yet at the same time everybody who says the same thing they’ve been saying over and over and over again which is like stop it stop responding stop getting warmed up by it’s stopping a petty person like they’re all right they’re all absolutely correct that is not how Vince Gilligan goes about his business that is not how you do good people make a good show but it’s
I don’t know when to you don’t like what do you dye your beard sitting on top when do you when do you start manipulating who you are and what what would it how people perceive you when is that like maintenance do you think they’ll ever come a point for you I would have do you aspire to have up to a healthier place when things don’t bother you like that do you foresee that even being possible I don’t I mean here’s what a healthy guy looks like on the internet is not there he’s healthy why would he be on the internet
if he is on the internet when he usually looks like his little eyes wide shut masked got his face because he’s not calling himself the the job that the guy that his boss can fire he’s calling himself scuba tube 69 and he’s and he’s just yelling at people about about jet propulsion Lori Hall at people used 40 years old like I really never rarely rarely like the anonymous bag of always been myself look on the internet like maybe that’s not weird self destructive thing that I’ve always done I should have a long time ago just like burst into a weird aerosol oath of weird characters that can just block their hearts out about how much everyone’s a piece of shit to do you think we’ll ever be some sort of a cross over where you become Buddha and you and you and you just said
Wii internet no bro did you alter you that’s a good thing to not bike but do you ever see yourself just like becoming you know just becoming the dude about it like letting it all happen and I’m not looking forward to it most of most of the good things that I do I do out of a nervousness that people aren’t going to like me if I do something else I’m not looking forward to the guy I would come when I am forced to disconnect you probably start writing it probably stopped running really nasty shit I don’t know I’ve no idea what I do I don’t know what I what I wrote I don’t know I definitely reached a Tipping Point of definitely reached a point of like like like clearly if I was in therapy right now I know
the therapist a long time ago listening to Matt my description of what I’ve been going through he would have said you have to figure out who the fuck you are because what’s happening to you is you are you are going to strangers to figure out who you are and when you do that you get what you deserve you were going to get static as a result that you’re going to that in as a personality that that is what a crazy person does a sociopath but in reverse a sociopath is is is is taxi a plane. A Runway because he doesn’t care what other people think it’s like some weird what am I I don’t know who I am bummed out of here if your identity is defined by
a lot of here cuz you’re very singular person but like a lot of your identity when you working on community that’s a that’s who you are it’s that it’s a relationship that you have the characters are kind of you to show is you people like or don’t like to show that means they like or don’t like you that it that’s that’s that’s thin ice like psychologically you don’t go into a job like writing TV with unresolved psychological issues gymnasium to work out there you’re going to exacerbate and Charlie Horse like pre-existing conditions shoes popular success or the whole like you know you can have the Big Bang Theory you have Breaking Bad you got to shut it the universe loves you on all the talk shows and everybody’s ignoring you do you think that would be more comfortable. I think I would figure out a way to self destruct I did because I would feel like a fraud I would feel I think that’s Oppositional Defiant Disorder or something
I would go like nobody’s pissed off cuz it’s not working I would I would figure out a way to fuck it up is that you not liking being told that you like you know your hand if you want to get punched at the bar you going to keep grabbing ass and tell somebody throws a punch at you I don’t know I love you Mandy
I feel like animals like you put them in a big pan in like there’s a like maybe there’s one of the animals that like has some kind of because it was a puppy mill puppy or something like I got to keep digging at the annex some dark corner I’m going to really change that or if I think it’s going to be okay I think I have like a it’s a tick like I I look at my brother is like frustrating with the same what does it say about you like you can be like part of it drives you like when you write anything again in class years ago and it was monologues until we were at a bar an hour before the class with no monologues and down going to go home and write you a monologue about you being in the CIA and I’ll see you at the class we have five minutes to look it over and kind of memorize it and do it anywhere great really really good there’s something going on in your brain that makes you very very good at typing thoughts down and making like an Makin good writing out of out of ideas that you have
it also there has to be a deficit there has to be something on the other side of that scale that that makes you a crazy person has certain ways that you can’t you can’t be good at that and I’m good at everything else and the same way like being a friend with you I just time for you to spend so much friendship it’s so much wisdom but you can come to you with a problem you just like I could just tell you a dream I had and you would you go and you dispense Yoda with them and they’re like like like a father that’s always on you can be completely distant and unapproachable as a friend but you get both of those things like you get incredible outpouring of attention and then you get zero you know I’ve been a part of
oh you just texting me
I’ll get back to you later what are they doing
I’m a bad person I don’t know
perfect artist guest
I do feel like what we should do like I did at least for a couple of rounds because I feel like there was there was there was there was an intensity that they represent the day they represent the fandom and then they don’t want to be accused of that or whatever it is I think it’s some kind of now has to because you came up as the voice of a certain thought but you really she’s just she’s just being Lisa having her own visceral reactions to things and I will always do that I will always punish people for for telling me not to talk to me what was Julie we don’t do this why do you like a little cute and grab a couple looks like there’s a lot of people here is there any questions or comedic on that didn’t get fielded
yes back in the back of the room
is there going to be more assertive
well now I’m sorry there’s not there’s no inspector SpaceTime in season 5 as as well as of right now cuz I’m going to space or time business trip there’s no space or time I kind of felt like I’ve talked about this before like inspector SpaceTime was like a it had this like really lofty goal and I wanted to actually be what it did start to become which is like the show dialoguing with the fans but what happened was it like it was so successful at doing that that Sony legal kind of panicked not to vilify that like didn’t really realize what they were getting into and it was some poor guy whose job it was at Sony legal that had to watch all the Doctor Who’s and whose job it is to somebody and I’ll take that job
I know and if some poor guy is Jody who didn’t want that job is like so funny about it and it illegal adding machine is desecrating his emails going like this is obviously a reference to Canine you can’t kid a Kidder it’s you know it’s a robot she had to like take it all of the all of the minutiae anyways another question in there
who the fuck do you think you are I’m glad you asked
Dad
I just think that you know about the whole thing yeah I just think that’s what it is if you don’t do what you do all the time is there a question in there I don’t bully him he’s praising man
I think I just hate when people you know don’t get questions
how do you feel about these before and we can’t even imagine
the writers that you know where is there a question in there
yeah is there a reason why I dance gun back

nice
and in case I didn’t get picked up over the microphone that is I feel any gratitude to the people that worked at Sea to walk into a barrel of tar on a show that had that entitle especially like they did take over running at they clearly like looked at what they were up against it actually made the the weirder decision which was to try to do the weirder show which they did not have to do and may have been like it so I can drive it I have I did looking at that I was like well they didn’t have to do that and of course any but it was working which show was not doing it to say fuck you to me it’s hard to separate that from the kind of brain that just gets up here and says well my garage needs to be cleaned out.
it’s like I’m not a diplomat a politician and I am so sorry when I say like what I watch season 4 what was that like well it was like this for me that’s what it was like for me and I was talking about myself and time of the stuff and then the next day it’s like yet I forgot to add or is it wasn’t as delightful for me to add of course and then you think about the fact that I want season for Once and probably like boom boom I want you probably heard my commentary on the DVD I’m not I’m not a big fan of my own work when I watch it again so I was definitely not going to be a big fan I think it was a noble thing I did was not
not watch that season until I had to because I had to go back because I knew I think that was probably the only healthy part of my brain was like you’re going to fuck it up for everybody if you watch that thing and I watched it and then I got your came up here whenever I I I I I said how I feel and and it’s it’s it’s it’s sucks when I say how I feel and it hurts other people that sucks yes everyone that worked on that season is the hero apparently everyone that works on any half hour of Television I don’t care if it’s like Tim Allen go ask Grandpa or what
it’s a are like like like like like like
it’s a young vivacious hipster to Tim Allen
who is Grandpa moved in with him and after years of being apart and he goes asked him for advice cuz he knows it’ll make him feel better I have you seen it and now I have to stop motion in it it’s crazy to get all these sequences into the grandfather’s dinner done in stop motion his father’s like is Cthulhu like creature in the window just go ask Grandpa Tim Allen goes in Grandpa always right half rock cod on the grill
but then there’s the other story is like what grandpa said I need to get into the restaurant on my wallet chain Scott and it’s the end of the second act is like
Star taxes took out his pants is really fine
I forgot what I was talking about the people that work on network television shows her or anybody would be a villain that’s hard work they go home very tired a lot of times they don’t make it all the way home they pull over to the side of the road and go to sleep some things that I was one of these people pull into the garage and could only make it that far and then fall asleep in the garage with the car is running and every once in a while statistically you know something happens and it because we pushed the limits of human labor I know I was telling me that why you got a hybrid
so I can sleep twice as long as yeah
it’s true I probably be dead right now but it never hybrid like I I remember one night waking up in my garage with the car running cuz I got to shut the hybrid people who think they would have to figure out was it a suicide
well did he have any other things going on right now yes of course god dammit and also in a larger sense I can’t apologize enough for anything I said that hurt the people that worked on that shit I’m sorry I sorry I grabbed off at Megan Ganz on Twitter I’m sorry I I’m sorry I sorry I feel like it’s some kind of personal issue for me that they made a season of my TV show without me I’m sorry I think it’s my TV show me perspective
that’s how it is that’s how the fans feel that’s how I feel it’s a Fan’s perspective a larger person like I Paul Newman would be like it’s my salad dressing I’ve got a rat tail in it I had said I was in which its Sundance I don’t give a fuk really is he
let’s do one more and then let’s move on let’s go up in front of your house
all right
you’re having an animated at the psychologically
dude I mean for season 5 where we go
help me out man
stop being a dick
I bet this is a whole other episode where you come up here and we talked about this James at starburns got you a work visa alright well boo hoo so you can try to help you out
didn’t James pillow from Starbucks under orders from Colonel Sanders
come up with that idea and its own it’s a great guy but my God so we can get a visa to you can’t work
seems like you’re dealing with it pretty well
I don’t like my job where you work like a giver Mike if you didn’t
what up yeah I’m an animation teacher at a university which reminds me of you know I I smash
I don’t enjoy teaching them enjoy the time with your career when you can say there’s no repercussions from my hometown from my my students are not going to listen to this season 4 of community was like Monterrey Mexico
16000
chameleon
yeah but I don’t know
people that you remember my little friend of course I do you know the real reason I do is cuz I play the game Pocket Planes on my iPhone at Monterey is like my big strategic like layover so well I’m so glad that we are useful for something other than drug dealing
I’m going to go to I’m going to sing karaoke at because I’m going to sing it happened in Monterey in your honor tonight you Julieta likewise
I honestly I end this is serious I cannot Listen to harmontown Because I get depressed because I’m not here I cannot it’s it’s one of these key chains
that’s me hanging from my hands
all right yeah I love you Dan and I respect you
you finally got what you wanted somebody come and pay as you go
I don’t know if you were like it what would you do I would I would I would be a majorette I would leave parade
give a little bit on the reason I do what I do is because if I did that everyone would go what’s to be thankful for a really
maybe we should just watch Wizard of Oz and the Macy’s day parade with shut down but if I did I would teach girls how to play Billiards
never met wrapping my arms around them and now you’re doing it wrong
I would manage a bank for 6 months but you can’t have any I’m sorry if I did that I feel like you fucking gross fat turd and kill myself so I stay away from that
I just understand what you could do if your popular if you can walk away from anything guy I would do anything I would probably be a serial killer
cuz that’s like the top job that people like come down on
if you’re a really popular you could you could really yeah you’re right it wasn’t a popular a popular figure now what you mean like letters you now like I I I can affect people to make shit happen that’s writing that’s what that is
the good guys are out there ripped like slaying demons with their actual sword and like making out with chicks like I’m going to have efficacy I’m going to write cheers I want to touch people but I might touch him in real life though flatmate that’s what that’s what writing is
is it a gross person getting a hug
I can’t believe that that’s surprising to anybody know who do you think does this sad and so sweet at the same time hug me hug me hug me hug me hug me I agree not a person that gets hugs all the time you didn’t all right I’m kidding when are we going to get into Dungeons & Dragons sweet
God do you want more players or what fuck no man alright the gruesome twosome hey man we still got character sheets and shit but I should have held the music at least our stuff out what’s going on what’s it like being my assistant this is the same question every week too I’m glad that sometimes you know we feel more comfortable talking about my weaknesses as an assistant now because you know that’s where the feedback is important to me and it helps me improve my job where do you feel like you’re dropping the ball Spencer I just I come from a lot of jobs where you have like everything to do a hundred percent the time like that Apple like there’s always things organized before that I worked up a company and like there is literally just carts of books and they wouldn’t stop so it was like you know that Sushi I Love Lucy thing but with books so I’m not constantly
chocolate yeah yeah sorry Josh
I thought I saw that but yeah they executed a lot better
The Villa near me
Eiffel 65
no no not blue they had other songs
specifically that song PlayStation 2
I don’t even know what to Jake and Josh’s I don’t know what you’re talkin about the school’s the PlayStation song has been stuck in my head and I said
this is my nightmare
no not blue was a good song also I mean about PlayStation or something it was just like some synth-pop stuff oh my God all these buzzwords I’m just seeing my words does fly over your heads amazing but yeah
rock and roll song lyrics for just like really really repetitive because they went along with like the the dance the electronic music back then that was kind of repetitive sometimes so was just they were little most of the song was just listing off video games I got the worst like I have an earworm song almost every day and they’re really bad cuz I get songs I don’t the words we have a song so I can hear that you don’t even know the words to it so you can’t even sing it like a heard somewhere that the most important part of an earworm is like the tempo like if you have a song stuck in your head you have its Temple exactly right but I don’t think he can make songs that have complicated tempos that just doesn’t happen to us now
when you’re done but should we have a guest play Chris de Burgh I thought about it now okay
and I’m just going to go bye bye bye God and Satan have a Tyler reprise Chris de Burgh lyrics
character sheets have been dispensed to Seminole pass mine down to me please and Spencer take it away sir all right
when we last met Our Heroes have been climbing these teams after filling the room with lava thank you Rose took refuge on massive stone statues but their next move interrupted by a familiar face breathy spider Creature from the shadow plane was back re-engineered quickly cyborg spider with a dagger strapped to his face preppy shot back
I had nothing to do with that
that’s true I pronounce Narwhal Narwhal
Jesus you’re not wrong he shot spikes it hit him in the stomach
alright alright so we’re still in the midst of this fight with our former at Ally turned enemy 20 right now is standing on these three statues the island in a sea of lava so above you the wise a lattice of link chains forming a sort of dizzy and tangler web of clinking steel above above in this web of Steel you can see breath he’s kind of situated in the middle like a big spider and cork you’re up there with him your your head button him in the face didn’t he get a chain and that was you all right you have a real din reeled in by the stomach chain scorpion style last last last I remember I wanted this was something that I was into I want to pull him for myself to him I mean that’s all you man can I start off by taking off of my head
oh yeah good thank you
you hear the scary scratching middle-grade and you see steel pump place open up in breakfast armor you see spider like metal things scramble out of his body and go into the the Tangled chains around you
spiders are all over the place robot spider the worst kind of guy is there in in dire strait I’m on breath he’s back right you were yeah I don’t know different I don’t think so okay he was he was like that
give credit where credit’s due you were on one of these islands
prices robot asshole I want you to have rope everything everything
should I go ahead to my arrow and I shouldn’t
like somewhere where you can attach so I can do no collect
you shoot an arrow as you shoot you realize you must have I not tied the Rope or something correctly because the arrow is pulled into the lava trailing with an all the Rope falls into the lava how do I roll but critically heavier than an arrow arrows used aerodynamic aeroplanes
putting it at Sharpies to use a metal chain coming out of them that’s in Maine for me I mean that would have been a question to ask 20 seconds ago
call Mitch and I going to be okay I can grasp that what you are to place buddy I appreciate that dealing
you feel a buckle Under the Electric stress of the lightning but it doesn’t move you like that am I going I’m good I mean sure but I’m quarks doing all right it’s clearly the heat me that he’s mad at me cuz I sucked him and then stabbed him in the back of the neck and killed him a long time ago in that order I think I recall I got up on top of me he was unconscious when I saw him to sleep kind of what I was going to be romantic about it
it’s worth doing is worth doing right to tack on brefi using your far sword attack on breath you cut a wide swath of flame
it hits you straight breath in three of his legs
they’re burned he takes 10 damaged in a fire sword wave continues on slicing through several of these chains and causing him to fall and kind of hang hang down who that could be good because you have to climb up maybe yeah as it happens and kind of readjust this balance to compensate for this he’s not but he’s unsteady cover the legs you guys he can’t stay up there without legs
most of us can’t just let me know when it’s my turn I will putting it at Chris De burgh’s turn my turn I definitely will
don’t worry we’ll let you know I just said that okay I’m helping me that’s not great yep yep
I’m going to use my armor to Autumn and go invisible and see if I can get a little bit close to do without him noticing that I mean you might notice I’m attached to him but I’m at least try I’d like to getting closer to him and Isabel
yep that after I was just making sure you didn’t run out of invisibility for the day wow
Stockton California man
you go invisible on the end of the chain well turn brefi turns his head all the way around like a robot person from that movie Clash of the Titans in Clash of the Titans there’s all sorts of things and all sorts of places
but Jeff you just got to keep your head up
you’re my present
sorry ever questioned as his head turns around to look at Sharpie his eyes begin to glow red beans of them I assume that’s the red light
and I just want to say you don’t have to feel bad we’ve all made mistakes siding with Admiral Dark Star was one of yours murdering you for no reason was ours
I don’t want to throw my friend to the bus but we’ve always wondered about him you felt the pain you felt the burn now let’s all live and learn
usually I like the speech happen but light is faster the speed of light so about like three words into that
your speech turns into something resembling
8 damage steering blade
in heat all right you’re going to keep track of that right yeah I think you and Krista Berger pretty much the only people hurt right now anyway she’s all right at the same time spiders start to Scuttle down the chain start to get closer to all of you they they start to they don’t start they just finish jumping up on you
it wasn’t a joke I mean
no it’s not that’s what I just said anyway managed to dodge however the rest of you get hit by robotic spiders you feel a kind of sharp sting as they do you feel their legs poking into your back pay stick stick on your bodies
turn
we’re going to find out
thank you for putting it more answer
putting any more intern
Wednesday morning at 10 so I don’t know like how much space do I have in my island in the crawl space about three feet above your head or some of these chains you might be able to grab on three feet three piece of meter I think that’s a pretty fair thing to know who the leaders of change
how much pain am I I mean not much it’s more the weirdness of a metal spider thing on it that’s the problem you know what if I’m very flexible
we’ll see
you try and grab that it can speak and price it off your back LOL they’re Saturn you got you got you a move action if you’d like I will oh yeah well since I can’t do that I’ll just try to climb
you leap upon a chain start to pull yourself into the web putting it now Dan it’s your turn Sharpies turn
you are clearly stricken low Rafi you have chosen your photos and alliances unwisely I understand why you chose them but now you need to look at how practical those choices are for we will kill you soon and you will only be left with death and integrity
join us now and have shame and life
do we really want a robot spider that are you applying at the Ghostbusters Slimer look I don’t know what happened that night
I wasn’t involved with that I I just know that we angered the spider it was a lot of misunderstanding like we go through this universe breathy I’m talking to him and we we have Random Encounters with monsters
we didn’t Craigslist Escalon on conflict resolutions and and and and you know things go off half-cocked and I don’t know people get hurt and I’m saying to you brother
with my
11 charisma
and my 12in decipher script

I can read the script of your face and I decipher your feelings I forgive you do you forgive me
no
well he’s been well this is this is nice that you’re doing this long conversation cuz I’ve been using this time to climb around to get into Prime fucking and killing position behind record
all right are you done I mean yeah
despite being on his back something about something maybe it was just a long speech it gave him the time to avoid your attack if you managed to miss touching him while being on its back
all right
I guess I accept that you ran out of breath
how close am I to the chains that he is hanging from it and do a Cleaves if I am a bad idea she can release him into the attached to him I mean I mean earlier
am I being suspended by the chain you’re not you’re not like yeah.
I mean do it man if he falls at 6 try to go for the queen
on the remaining legs you strike one of them dealing
Jesus Christ 17 damage
his leg is shorn completely off and falls into the orange lava
last minute I mean no all out only one leg is gone three or damaged okay rest are healthy legs
yeah okay just counting in my head Chris De burgh’s turn to spend it solely on a chain like an ornament to pull yourself up by this chain okay trying to do that you tug at the chains but is it insane
you can’t you can’t do it what’s beneath mean
I mean I can try sweet I mean I kind of want to get this chain off of me though I have that’s all I could get yourself into a chain that you can actually like you want to be on my way over to one of those things are you at let me see if I get some animal myself you myself closer one of those chains
alright you manage to swing yourself up you’re starting to get some momentum but it’s going to take another turn to actually get you that high
I’m really excited about how fast I think it’s like a metronome or something anyway it’s worth a try was worth a try
putting it at breakfast with no Arrowhead Dynamics
I mean do you mean it was no pun
anyway you feel these metal spiders all up in your back there digging in deeper and they’re they’re pulling in Tighter and it’s hurting and it’s hurting and now they’re starting to heat up their feeling warm their feeling hot all you got is like a hot stone and I hope
I just say it’s more like a metal spider that has dug Pond your back isn’t it again they’re not glowing red though like the lasers they’re glowing green and you see crackling energy develop on his skin and it actually goes out and lightning arcs directly at you and you feel all these lightning is going through your bodies and they hit the spider on your backs and you feel it just light up white hot on your back in it and it burns in your skin is melting and the charred metal spiders fall off as electrical energy surges through your body
dealing
you take seven Chris de Burgh takes 11 true work takes zero Christopher takes 11 also takes 11 damage
Sharpie taste well
not going to work it’s not just that I’m not paying that you he was right I mean I totally forgot that I’m sorry sorry Jeff. It’s kind of like when a guy stabs you he no longer has a knife
I’m sorry I didn’t know I was barely any more fires turn okay
wait what
did you say pseudo okay no I thought you said you’re already wearing that that’s on your body I’m just telling you
so in that case I’m going to shoot two arrows to one of the injured list
sorry like I said I can’t listen to the podcast without being depressed so I showed three arrows arrows two of them strike true
being useful woman female character that’s what that was that was very dynamic
what does air has what you did there was very aerodynamic
call Dad pun
I thought that was funny and then I got it if you have to think about it then it’s still funny
tickles you if you think about it there’s no reason to laugh at that
Kris Kristofferson
character design 1017 I’m on top of them I’m still swinging assume that I’m at a shocking grasp right now it’s like three yeah that reduce person doesn’t work on a spider person correct even though I knew him as a person that’s true a physically reducing size reverse
okay so so just do do Uncle Dan a favor just indulge me for a second I was raised in an era of video games I can’t picture what the hell is going on right now we are in a room is filling with lava there is chains hanging down in a sort of web webpage Nest that Weber says yeah and I’m on his back what’s his knuckle is like hanging from ya like like I pulled out of his chest cavity it really does and I’m an ornament
an accessory visible
I know there’s something really smart invisible straps
Cadillac
okay
yeah well you have to deal with this mail
invisible I can’t shrink item on the chain in his chest and make it small enough to come out of his chest well I just saw you can do ray of frost on the lava underneath underneath Tyler can Kyle and them know you have this thing called the staff of that also I like Powers but it’s not a zero level spell right right of frost right I promise if I do think that if I use that on the magma beneath his feet but it would turn it into a kind of regular Stone like City and make it make ice cream on it I want to do a camera take right now who knows man
bringing your water frosted bear you pull the trigger and as a trigger on it
why don’t you know a seat
I don’t know how later
I’ll throw it to a room
a cold blue cone of emanating Frosty energy sprays into the lava in it creates a thick hard shell on the surface
yeah yeah you know how the dinosaurs died
it wasn’t as most people maintain a giant meteor that hit the end of the testing of dust into the sky to cause the food chain to be disrupted it was the ice age
you got there
nice to see you guys just eat you ice just eat you out it it it literally is I used to see you thank you sir that’s great
I used to know I used to see you is better Adams to get lit up we have a winner
there’s no second place come on
it’s been fantastic
putting it at quark’s turn my mighty sword and attack straight into a breakfast face parts
I want to kill this guy and I did my part you know some of us are going to keep fighting the spider with an I was having a bad day and Nana
Oh you need to stop talking
call back mighty sword attack on Raffi
you deal but a mere nine damaged shit I guess not I thought it was + 6/14 damage I mean you have the sheet but you know I write the episode when I’m driving driving driving the harmontown never see these sheets it’s not true he’s 14 damaged oh yeah Chris de Burgh Stern we last left swinging invisibly on a chain
okay I could try to cut the chain in. We heard it the first time that I’m sorry
my cold
I don’t know still try to grab a chainsaw chain for the first part of my accident if I was at yeah that happens at the crest of your swinging this and you got one free okay I’d like to use my wire side of a wire saw here trying to see if I can cut this chain off of me since all the stuff you’ve been doing is like takes all these turns I’m just going to tell you could do that but it’ll take two turns do you want to stop by just to give a shit by the way the noble work of signing away your trash
put these turn as it continues to spin around in his eyes kind of turn blue lights and you guys all feel a little weird because we can tell how ashamed of himself he is that’s the blue light of self-awareness
Christopher Hadfield sick to his stomach that continues his song Maneuvers the rest of you are unaffected turn
well I think I’m going to do the thing I was doing before that was almost racist
not if you say it
okay so I’m going to shoot three more arrows to another like because somebody has to actually try to kill the spiders
the new Fire free arrows two of them fall into the I guess it don’t fall into the hit the hard lava Krusty floor the other one does however strike true hitting them directly in the eye and dealing damage robot metal I shattered stops glowing blue putting it Sharpies term take a step back
I’m kind of busy right now shopping
what is what is Rod of the serpent do turns into a serpent of Old Testament does not I mean look
suppose I use my router frost on breath he’s head just wait Sun rod
what’s the sun Rodney Rivers like a flashlight
I will hang out of that
okay there’s one more alright I’m going to use the defrost on breakfast okay bringing to Bear Your Rod of frost you pull the trigger
several shards of ice shot into his head knows you lose
you had a whole round to think of that but I swear to God I just thought of it now
I promise, cross
all right, there’s a heavy traditional out with the that movie is amazing YouTube clip of all of Arnold in a row did the dinosaurs die
just chill out it wasn’t an invitation sorry
sorry I said it was a gentleman meeting is about to happen
all right what the fuck happened
I’m sorry a lot of terrible puns teen damaged face head
I used to face head and you see his other I kind of start to Flicker and go out as it starts up
which is a bit like a person’s twitching might look and then he begins to fall into the drink
you’re on his back still that’s why I jump I use the spell jump
now you can’t cast that but you can jump normal Style
jumping off of them as he falls Heath crashes to the Krusty lava floor and he hits with a thump you see cracks begin to appear in this lava floor how long is the chain the catching him as he falls you know you’re spying viciously at this chain in the impact combined with all this sign all this hard work you’ve done causes the change of snap right at the point of sign it so convenient shit
is Murphy alive or dead he’s not quite dead but he’s also not moving you see cracks develop in the lava floor and they get wider is lava I think is there a timer at how how much time do I have before this lava lava is starting to consume them as we speak you’re going to have to it you’re going to have to shower never Road
just driving how bad I want to fuck Raffia go
how do I get to myself
and I passed it to the chain and the rat my chest and I swing down as I’m swinging over
Sparta Tire Service try to swing by
I go down like Mission Impossible like that I got and I got to come down there aren’t my phone if it goes straight down
and I try I try to like I kind of like become like a spider which is consumed by Passion your rope tying skills are what they usually are and how do you lower yourself and raping position
The Roots lips when you fall directly onto the corpse of breath into the hot lava jump back out or do you fuck them real fast
how fast are you tomorrow do you have rope okay cool I grab the rope and
can I throw in my button staff staff that has the button on it when you press the button that stays in place okay button staff do not require a crap if I grab it when I get going down and I I grabbed the first half and I fucking real quick and then I jump out of the staff and give me a line
I’m a lover not a fighter, Lori had the hots for the spider
yeah that was appropriate thank you guys at so he’s now does he go into the lava
touching the button on the button staff you extend the staff is it the Krusty lava Lair and into the molten lava you don’t know what’s happening for a while but then you feel yourself rising up on the staff into the chains you get into the chains but then the staff becomes hot in your hands too hot to touch the chain as the staff melt into molten metal worth it right
i i i before even says anything I give him a lift this is worth it
you did the right thing
as it drips under the lava thinking man twice died
now
I showed up at the ceiling
the camera pulls out
becoming a Hermit and everybody
thank you very much for coming in tonight thank you for coming to communicon
I hope you love season 5
Thank you Lisa thank you Katherine thank you Julianne thank you all thank you for your help with the puns
hi Jeff Davis tour, Keller and I’m going to keep it going for your measurements or Dan Harmon

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