Episode: 136 – Dick Pic

Episode

Episode: 136 – Dick Pic

Description

It’s Oscar night and Dino almost had a three way. There’s a new Adam Goldberg, Erin McGathy’s acceptance speech game corner, Shadow Run and more. RIP Harris Wittels, we miss you. End music “Lisa” by Don’t Stop Or We’ll Die.

Transcript

we brought the mayor of this town
Dan Harmon
you want to lick your face
my name red carpet John.
Hey I got my tuxedo on interview with the Stars
red carpet giant relation to AMC John and of course
probably the same guy that Izzy related this is the same guy at a jacket to do and you don’t bother to the button to your clip-on bow tie I just dishes
what can be done
I bought this text the first actors actually get Amy’s or something I got to go to and I think she wait wait so a little bit so it was the shirt you couldn’t get the boat I actually doesn’t it doesn’t go around anything as soon as you know did you watch any of the Oscars and the opening so it’s it’s in th so he’s coming out so we know we know what they’re going after they’re going after the Hugh Jackman Oscars that I wrote right they’re pursuing that
okay we know I won an Emmy for writing those Oscars look it up and I did not get a humorous elements and it was but it was it was a nice like it was both sincere and like totally respectful of the modern world and also like you could you felt it did a good job I like making it feel like you were watching something worth watching live in the increasingly start to ask a question why are we watching this shit like I said it was an opener that like really answered that question like like check it out this is nice as a dude dude he’s doing his thing and they did like special effects that Blended the live-action with
saying huge kind of fuck you too Billy Crystal like they just did a kind of like just a little quick like thrown over the shoulder like a little visual Montage of him like sitting in little it wasn’t a fuck you I’m just saying it was like that and I said no standing ovation
and by Hugh I mean you I thought you said you and I have no problem with it your ear is filtered out the Hood part of that you Jackman I looked at my phone later some that you I was like I didn’t hear my phone beep when it beeps when I saw what time the timestamp wasn’t it was as that thing I did and it was a text from Rob schrab that said no standing of
nice nice to know we’re still keeping it real let’s see what I got in here huh I mean what it what is it some kind of Gala
it just says no standing go in my notes what’s it what I thought was going to be at your Oscars how many Oscar has was that a go how many years ago did the 81st is going to be 6 years ago now we are watching from a tiny old school CRT television backstage and it was awesome because it it we were in the shity rented taxes because we didn’t have time to go home and they just like they have like this tux kind of service for all this so it cruel that works on that show that everyone’s working right so they just like to get you get like a number and you go up to this wardrobe floor they just give you a talks for the night like if your crew and so we had this like laminate time with his shity baggy touches I were just watching from this walk-in closet on this a little television screen
watching it watching Hugh Jackman go to the same place where I broke a bone in my foot from jumping up and down cuz he was nailing it really fun time in my life and every once in a while Ben Schwartz who now it seems funny that that he was one of the Three Musketeers because now he’s like a famous actor is it on Parks and Rec & Ed of course House of Lies
with Don Cheadle is that the name of that show
every once in a while he’ll see he’ll email like a photo of Ben Bruce Vilanch like sleeping in a corner or something like 7 I took from back then we were just kids we didn’t know what we were doing at Hollywood loved us for it
if I could go out with my Hollywood Story. I got the hair I have to bail out of the cab yeah it was bad pills and the booze was like combining and and she she hopped out and I remember why she was why she was there while she was previously been nominated for art department or something like that if you win anything like if you if you drew Shrek’s balls do you just have to keep going to be nominated you’re allowed to govern yeah we were sitting way up but you’re not down in the main thing I was watching it even just a little bit I don’t know if it’s jealousy or just like what
yes but it’s definitely like it if it’s if there’s a haunted feeling I want to be back there at the Kodak
the smell of greasepaint here’s what I want to know a couple years ago so some of you kids are young enough that you you you were around like you probably don’t remember that they would do the in memoriam Oscars and their time before I told everybody clap your favorites
cuz they’re all dead sea so it’s starting to get weird but it was like free if wherever that was just a tradition they would just show people you know and then Ernest Borgnine would come up in there would be like this like it applies brake and then they fly through three like if it needs a bone man key grip or whatever the fuck you
and then like bizios rousing applause if it could move great cultural advancement that we made as that seems a little empty as far as like correctness but I do but I do think that we involved when someone said let’s tell him don’t applaud until after all the Death however they do that now it’s even weirder you got to take that these these faces come up and it totally sent you Callie brace yourself for Robin Williams cuz he’s the headliner death and you’re like are they going to save him for last how does this work you always are always asking is morbid questions right way during these things because it because you have your blending two worlds that don’t belong presentation entertainment and the inevitability of the corporeal world
chronologically in order of death
how did you know that Mike Nichols was last
okay alright 2.2 terminal Ian okay traffic in terms of the amount of famous that died
is it hard to honor that the famous dead without it like feeling weird cuz you’re like what is this a routing for a know them but the so your break but the people were silent there was no like okay with Robin Williams okay great but the weird are you here like this and come on up in a second let me finish my point
you’re like this little girl say Mike Nichols and then you just here like like like like two or three people like somewhere in the back of the house like
we know that that’s not like mrs. Nichols because no one’s going to express their connection to the the death with Applause so and we also know what to do for a human being that had that knows that they’re their breaking rank says it was just like the world’s biggest Psycho Mike Nichols fan
you got my game like who are these it’s so weird I would say I would say to somebody who’s going to be somebody who doesn’t like to know if I’m allowed to apply to Mike Nichols because he he wrote The Graduate or whatever it’s like some kind of weird career brothers and writers in the audience like like they’re plotting or something for Billy Wilder I don’t know I don’t know I don’t know I don’t know I don’t know
are you a little little on the way that you’re not invited back to see whether or not when I was at the Oscars I was I was a lowly Keebler Elf backstage I was honored to do my duty I wrote a little bit the pattern for Jack Black is Jennifer Aniston and I wrote that emmy-winning opening and thank you thanks if you want to look it up I want an Emmy for writing the Oscars which is kind of cool can you can you sing a little bit of it for us remember your favorite line from it
The Lonely Island guys were on stage tonight at the Oscars in the opening opening he did like a sort of pseudo Jack Black wrap was fun. Wondering if they wrote that for Kanye and then got Jack to do it Jack said I can trap the Trap I hoping it can you could come and just watch it and we were in line in the rain Dan we weren’t late feels like
weird to not mention that our our friend a friend of so many of us Harris wittels is lost now it was it couldn’t have been a more tragic passing totally very much just tragic just accidental like like I and I really like you know I would like to take one moment to say to people who every time like somebody when somebody’s death involves a car you don’t like you don’t divert your attention away from who the person was in and whether you respect them or not or whether you’ll miss them to like spend a lot of time to buy automobile statistics in the industry and insurance and stuff and here’s a number you can call and make sure you’re insured
it like leave it the fuck alone if somebody lately clear everybody takes cars everywhere Every Day card kill all kinds of people writers do heroin cocaine in the drink they people have different addictions and struggles and they are an addition to that human beings and if you could if you could if you don’t know the person and they died in a way that is symbolic for you politically like could you could you I mean like I think for a second before you leave that Instagram caption or that earlier that tweet you know it’s like it’s not it’s not your time to work some shit out like it’s it’s just a guy that died and it’s they could do no more no more cruel on God’s part to kill somebody through a horrible you know like pressing addiction than it is to kill them with an Ansel or cancer or anything it is all part of this big city world that we are all like you know
I didn’t and Harris was a like if you go if you go online and double you’re going to see like how I like it incredibly like tragic is that that he would be taken from us at such a young age and he he he was not a responsible and he did not make bad choices and he he was very smart and very self-aware and just very very very very funny and very like just a just a good guy and he just had a bad accident and and now he’s gone and this is the way that life is and so go Go I mean I retweeted like an article that was a really nice like trying to find the words of who was he you know why was he so cool and why did we not notice
you know what what what what labels to put it on how to describe him as one of the nice things about this new podcast universes you can you can just type in his name and you can go find him on so many podcasts like telling really amazing stories about about struggling with his addiction for a sense about a bit about all kinds of things I’d like he was a linchpin of this community and we are like so many of us are just really really shaken by this one it’s it’s a it’s a it’s a tough one and if you want that bargaining phase to be okay so let’s all make up our minds call your sponsor a sticker on your singing where this ribbon is that such as bargaining is healthy is denial and it’s ultimately acceptance is the only thing that’s going to be honest like like who gives a fuck how they died it’s not important it’s not who they were at it’s not it’s not it’s there’s no such thing as a deserve death or anything like that so please just like like Yoda.
will the guy was go go go go go listen to his stories he was he was an old soul I guess I didn’t know either he was that he was just a kid when he he started work on the Sarah Silverman show after I left he kind of arrived there as I left to fill that vacuum and she was literally a child and was just like you you can’t swing a cat in the city without without finding somebody that has a a good story about him and I know it’s all laced with the with the stuff and there’s nothing there’s nothing to do but grieve and and and accept it
I seen since he died
I just want to say that I actually met your hair is here once and kind of shared a moment and can’t believe he’s gone humblebrag
is there a lot of humblebrag and go I got in the wake of his his his passing see this
I tried it peed in my pants what do you mean tell I well I got here and I had to pee really bad and and and the guy out there he was really nice he’s like he’s out there like I don’t know why I don’t know for some reason I felt like
sorry yeah I went in and I took a piss and I and I zipped up too soon I was still peeing
where is a nightmare that really peed in your pants I mean news on them stupid I don’t know if I’ve ever done that they say that no matter how you shake or dance the last drop is always in your pants that sounds like something MC John would say
call cheese do the parents of the parents to the keys they put my drink to go together I know I know you’re working a lot and I’m just drunk and I ate your traveling you’ve been back for a couple weeks now and I haven’t seen you at all like you go off the traveling the world Canada and Canada must be working for Smigel insult comic dog
it needs work but I think it’ll be okay so what’s compare them to me vertically hierarchy
he has I could sneak out easier of out of his shell than your show so he’s more talented as you are living the high life out there man I yeah I mean it was ridiculous visiting up there and tell me if I’m wrong you would work a little bit at the office that you would take your work away to the barely at the office I was like you know I can really work here I like working at a bar and I like yeah whatever works for you and you know I would just get drunk and and boys and girls and
yeah it turns out that everyone in fucking New York is beautiful including me apparently you’re sexy yeah I don’t know how I think people go out there because they want to have an adventure they want to like I want to fuck things up I want to be I want to deal with ugliness and then there I am I mean
is there a scene from their kind of pee color pants on us these were white
wow that’s a lot of pity you got to you got to subscribe to the to the live feed for stuff like that that subscribe to the live feed you’re really missing out on a pee stain right now
how have you guys been doing really hard to write Community this year it’s like extra extra hard seriously admit it I admit it
no I really don’t want to write if you want to do it for the people that’s that’s an admirable I will admit that I don’t know I’m not a hundred percent sure I did it for my own Joy by I put the last thing I want to do is lay down the fucking fans doorstep
I was saying that you want to do it you want to do it I think I was I do feel and the other thing is you’re listening to my running commentary while I’m in the process here so you know don’t I mean I just feel this in the moment with me cuz I don’t I’m never right I don’t know I never know what the fuck I’m talking about but right now I feel like I am I am doing a horrible job and like a couple weeks ago I was like I’m a guy and then a couple weeks before that and I’ll be like oh it’s working okay then that’s how God works. That’s why there’s a fucked-up yeah
when he pops up on a part of God damn I made too many people again so now I just feel I feel the burn it feels like it feels like doing a crunch like I just feel like For Better or For Worse like I’m like I’m working and I like we need to do it for the fans and safe lay off him let him know let him not work on a community for a while and I think this is a problem solves itself in the year would be like Jesus Christ like an idiot like am I in the zone of the first seven characters are gone so now what am I doing with the remaining four and what am I doing with the new to
am I am a servicing them to my exploring them can ever really I try to I try to be like psych myself out and tell myself it’s just a new show so just know Isaac characters or is that my job or am I supposed to just be telling jokes tonight I don’t I don’t know what I’m doing and then I watch a kite and I’ll be like on Tuesday I’ll be like I did it the best season ever can’t believe it’s on the internet so TV and then on Wednesday on like I fucked up I did it real bad I want to go home my wife hasn’t seen me like that like now I just sleep on my couch in the office like I like like last week she saw me on Valentine’s Day which was Saturday and then she saw me the following Saturday I was slept at my office every day and that’s the way to do it I don’t know I got some pretty shity text
we should we should we should we should read our text messages with 222 jazz music now I
I don’t I don’t know what that would be I don’t know what that would how that would work that you were you told me about that oh yeah for some reason you know I go out to New York and I’m attractive I already said that and it’s baffling to me and there’s a 23 year old couple and they want to have a threesome with you know I got I guess they want to fuck their say you’re an early that’s a good time. It wouldn’t
I’m not giving you space
so I don’t know if it’s a good story or not I just and I forgot because it has happened in a little bit
how does it how does it sound like and look like when a couple chooses you I’ll tell you what it sounds like it sounds like the girl is going yeah we’re really opened everything we are where we want to go we want experiment we want to have sex with the grossest shit in the world and all that and the guys like yeah whatever she wants
well I don’t know whatever how you doing a drink and then the guy obviously wasn’t as into it as there’s a girl I’d rather hear that story of the other than the where the woman is all right for you to Bob so so in the middle of that I was like what you guys figure it out I got I’m going to meet my friends and I’m going to go have dinner and they went out and they got Coke and of course you know I’m start getting taxed like my you know for you kids out there if it was my phone was ringing off the hook I don’t know if you know what that means is an expression like yeah we’re ready we’re ready where are you and I’m like eating fucking Peking Duck and getting really fat and
and finally I just said like I can fart through your our threesome you know let’s do it tomorrow after I take a shit
yeah so the guy doesn’t want to fuck me anymore and and the girl breaks up with a guy yeah and I know she wants to have them for the rest of our life I have a kid I have a I have 8000 fucking animals and frogs I fuck you know I mean I don’t know
meaning are you you’re you’re an untamed stallion is what yeah oh yeah I didn’t want to put it that way cuz I’m humble but so you know what then we had some good sex and you know I ever her pictures in my phone you want to see him I do her address up there so you might like scroll through a few of my dicks
do you know who Stephen dicks
I got I got a few more since New York full of cuz there was so much pouring out of there so my mind you said porn but you must have said something else it was like ambiguous like like like like like sex movies or something because I remember I just heard I just thought I was like really you on your phone like that’s that’s interesting is like just for using in the bathroom or later like no I mean you do it again
can I see
I thought you meant I know I was like well that’s Natalie from marketing
yeah well I thought mr. Harmon from community
you’re breaking so many hearts after his girls are just falling for you it’s not just that you were out there being promiscuous and they’re resilient there was a girls don’t care I mean look at me I’m if no one’s going to break their heart over me or I curl my phone hiking like a year ago and that phone God damn it has so much shit about me like like text like ridiculous text and pictures of everyone and me and like you know like I like to take pictures of my dick and my face cuz
can I can I get a picture of my dick in your face a newspaper headline that says Dewey defeats Truman
because I want to I want to remind the woman like like don’t believe everything you see
what is an early edition
yeah actually it when you take a picture like that with your dick and then your face your dick looks cute like it’s the enveloping your face has a small penis thing I just don’t understand take it like this works that’ll be like if if you and McGregor with my headshot I was inaccurate. They want me to come in
I don’t understand that the dick pics on paper when you hear about that you immediately think yourself this is something that only men would think that that that women would want like like on Jeopardy as a cultural thing is that there is there is participation in that you can go to the point where you’re actually like kind of
I was right I was I was thinking I would ever go to remember the last time they solicited a dick pic from some of the people that stay out loud then how many women in the audience like have they ever said to a man in one form or another and text like send me a picture of your dick I like you know something like that one woman says oh yeah for sure
we heard we heard mother nature
if you if you want to
did you face the crowd
Meet the Press
is it like it’s just a guy you like and it’s like I mean I guess it’s the analog is if it’s
I mean it’s not like it’s not like it’s not like oh hey dude I was getting your number when there was only landlines like

sometimes our relationship would get to the finals but like like like I’m not with you and we can’t be together and they do weird things through the medium that’s allowed I said now we have pictures and you’d have to be in your phone already registered what’s your number said that the way the conversation probably goes is the guy probably says is it in terms of flattering a woman like I am in this state right now and then the woman says no pics or it didn’t happen that’s yet
when you’re at when you’re asking for that did you for this particular guy had you you had already seen the wiener in question you weren’t seeing it for the first time that would be weird or not you’re going shopping for a little bit and go like you know what maybe women like sex too I guess like the kind of the way that men do way of having sex without having sex is like having sex with a distance lucky so generally the face like a centaur.
he’s got his pinky out there’s a hoverboard I don’t know what it’s a dick is a dick you knew what you were getting more less of it wasn’t me a picture of a guy’s dick shaped like an ampersand
I mean I would be interested but for different reasons
it’s a dragon dick that’s breathing fire that forms its own Spencer’s dick is an innie right now after you said that
I don’t have a compressor for different reasons but it is critical I don’t know
what time is it
that was on the way out the door and you were bought it at so what does that make you do actually shopping for more dick pics
not nearly enough Dan in the house
harmontown nights I wish I had a big dick so bad it to everybody
remember I took my shirt off a little bit lately people are impressed when you just like not afraid to show our friends like Chris romano and actually Harris wittels was one of them like like for a joke they would just like you know if Sarah would ask like like they would just you just naked other put their balls in the coffee whatever but you know I look in there go in and my dick smaller than that that’s why they’re doing acid well yeah I think that’s what it is like dude I make my eyes have a set of the show I like mine isn’t it my mind I praise only its practicality like
or I when it is not an operational mode like it just made as a nipple
it says mine it doesn’t matter back then I’m going to like it in the future is what matters
well I’m married. I got out so I’ll send a picture of my dick at some point I guess I’ll send it now
going to the bathroom right now
take a take a dick pic will wait for you
I’m not going to eat that it’s in the morning down in the DMS going a huge family gathering Viking soul food do you miss meeting the parents so I can get out well actually, never misses that but you can still do all of these things with me Desmond Thorne on my podcast adventures in Black Cinema each week I take you on a journey through a new black film how it relates to the culture and sometimes have the themes related my own life so there’s always a little tea and a slight bit of embarrassment and of course as a filmmaker myself and one of the blackest Phil nerdiest Phil murdered like ever you’re always in good hands
adventures in Blacksburg, but Desmond Thorne executive-produced by Amanda seales new episodes every Tuesday on all major podcast platforms
but let let let slip slip slip bring my wife out here in mcgathey
play she’s doing oh yeah yeah I want to hear the woman conversation about
you got to fix Coronavirus
call Aaron
wow
down to harmontown you’re dumb
Oscar night that is a whole lot of crinoline can we get another chair a committee thing or a power thing it’s dirty I’m nervous to send this to you you’re my husband but I was like I want to I just want to ask him to take a picture of his face
I’m not as opposed to a k a Scoops my little my little Cloud baby
you’re wearing that because you saw the red carpet this year is all about beards for the men and white dresses with more white dress then a wedding dress uncomfortable send a picture of your face as a like maybe part of it’s a power thing yeah I’m taking a picture about the dick pic and playing with whether or not to say that so I guess I’ll just say that I have asked for dick pics today
there are a couple times and I’ve spent your sexy pictures of me and then I felt embarrassed because they’re not reciprocated but it’s like they actually came to me oh no I’m glad I got to go see you’re in the kitchen making your Greek chicken in just the beads of sweat dripping off of your disgusting body and he is
something to cover up how you feel sorry for me to feel like I’m fatter than I am
so I can I was like I was like a jiu jitsu move
I should send you a picture back when you send me one of those pictures during the day or it’s just we’re looking cute I should send one back how many copies of Bridget Jones Diary about you send me back a picture of your penis
space for it but it’s better for me because I don’t know what to type so
State Street
where you from
New York living out here now you visiting
what is 1 / everybody
recent having fun
gets me script soup before it I guess this is what a liquid Aloha from Longhorn I don’t know if it was the only thing that was a horrible heavy Stout my friend is drinking straight of Ketel One though so there’s so there is that
let me finish that are you fucking him are you dating that guy what’s your name of this insignificant
what are and you brought you didn’t you bring an activity and ask for night activities
Coke you you’re cute you’re so cute that is so sweet but it’s really sweet that you let me have I asked when I could get up and talk for the Church of the first and last time he let me do this I came in early and I took bags of glitter and glue them underneath all the chairs to at cuz I wanted to tell us store I just heard read the story or heard the story of Meshach Shadrach in a Bendigo really stuck with me they were protected by an Angel and they lived there a fire in three of those orange glitter and everybody reached under their chair and brought out the thing and then got glitter all over them and and told the story to remember when we were preparing for the wedding and my dad was like don’t give her any good or if that’s because of that
do you know what that means
I could probably put three and a half hours
honey you could fit that with them millions Thursday I do have an activity I have a little game Corner activity I left someone can hand me the black book that’s back there
thank you I’m going to read my goals for 2015
I’m not really okay so if we could if we could set up two mics that are facing a camera that look like presenter Mike’s at the Oscars this is a game called present
staying with you for this game thank you Jeff is wearing a lovely charcoal suit
I’m not sure which which camera should we makes us look like we’re presenting at the Oscars this one or that one
that one is your red light your way of saying yes
all right it is here is the year 2020 these are these are the Oscars and Jeff and Dan are going to be playing various presenters at the Oscars
presenting various Awards and a Dino and Lana if you feel inspired at any point to be a part of this you are welcome
we’re going to organize the best night of our lives
fly from the
On the Dark Side of the Moon
fighting movie award for best supporting actress is Alan Cumming and Charlie Callas
working
best supporting actress has a very important I think I’m British
and the nominees are Jodie Foster
how come there’s no apple juice
Meryl Streep for the virus in the Wind
exactly what are you talkin about
Renee Zellweger in
wow
the Oscar goes to
Jodie Foster
okay
I think we did that wrong right I’m going to say I do
come to the street from filling in the creator of the Dark Side of the Moon
they will be presenting best
do they need no activity you because we respect their power they will be presenting a best original song
you know they say that the song is the heart and soul of a movie
and without a song
the movies not really the whole experience has got to be the worst Oprah Winfrey ever
I was going to say hello
I got so depressed I sold a joke I peed in my pants
denominator
alright later in the night Drew Barrymore and Dakota Fanning presented the not have the Oscar for best original screenplay
I got to do the AC why that’s the worst
the writing of Kate Hudson’s impression of Drew Barrymore is what I’m doing right now
and is magical
what’s the top what’s this what’s the combination again which is which category original screenplay

what’s the name what’s the name
Dakota Fanning and a moment that will be forever Remembered in Oscar history as the time it happened when Billy Crystal and Benedict Cumberbatch presented best picture
come on Billy Crystal’s dead by then right he’s got to be
that is the worst Oprah Winfrey I’ve ever heard
all right
how’s it going
all right that’s Dynamite that was fun thank you for my opposite of a beautiful alright let’s make sure is it is it Lana Lana is it land is it is Lana spelled differently from Lana no no Lana was just a few correct people
sometimes if it seems like they’re going to be like my name a lot but I really am that bitch was out of her mind
if I’m sure she’s the one
I kind of feel like it’s a thing happening with Dino and Lana right now I feel I feel like it’s happening oh yeah well don’t tell it I don’t think I’m going to whisper sweet nothings in your area
Niger
my cat sprays Babel
my man is always work
such a hard r
alright well what do you think I’m trying to figure out a way to put a ribbon on it not the dick
no no he’s he’s here visiting from Texas know what hit them believe it was he supposed to also have sex with you or was he supposed to just have sex with the woman alongside is come off for her or something like that
they didn’t put the n-bomb as hard as that exactly what I was thinking
it’s got to be at least one African-American harbhajan for tonight it’s just like wait a minute
I’m going to go home and let it go
is come off of any way I used to ask when I was in high school and thought I was clever would ask all the guys that I knew how they thought of their penis was it a tool a trophy or a toy a to a trophy
what was it what is the what what is a tool a trophy or a tocayo
like it doesn’t have to be big cuz I know how do you win a dick
come over here.
what it was to come over here I’ll show you
that’s right but it’s your own I mean I understand how someone else could win it like I I consider all of the all of my weiners collaborators to be winners and Subway I hope they’re not feeling like they lost something but I took the trophy with me and also nevermind at 8
I mean would you have lipstick I love my dick would you have when you know one organism
all right well I need any Penny parting socks if they’re Moment Like That sweep you want
I don’t have any final. Either the I’m bad about it interviewing a bad about it figuring out windows how do you say you’re good you’re a nice guy how do you say just I don’t want I didn’t want her to leave just feel like I was feel like the Wisconsin in me is like wants to be like ironic about it like I don’t want to I don’t want to just like I want to be like Craig kilborn
no no I wasn’t interested is a spineless thing I want to take charge I don’t want to be I want to be like like like like I don’t like the idea of me print across as having the pretense that the show has any direction at all that’s what it is like you guys to talk right now either
not so spineless anymore
I think it’s because you’re wearing a text that you feel like now there’s suddenly a structure to the show their experience as I do the show for years I’ve always done this I’ve always had trouble at the end of this your first fight of people I’m supposed to go like I feel like such an odd thing to be the person that says try this phone calls over it just it’s just a lot of power do you need to prove that you’re working through this I get that doesn’t need you to talk lady
but I liked it
I just play that play that song I just want to say I got it in my head it’s a good song right got famous
Tom and Jerry
I’m going to break it down break it open the door
don’t know what’s up
are you off tomorrow
can I see my shoes
City movie
Stop in if you would like to join a sociopath
it wasn’t technically bereft film about nothing at all
any more stupid stupid stupid lady just had bangs doesn’t have a character
it’s a choice he’s an actor really embarrassing to sit through that movie was fucked up man
family was so fucked up
to be out of breath for a couple weeks
get even with all that irony I still feel old but I just don’t understand how do I make tonight’s not mean I like you you’re a nice guy but but what the fuck is everyone here for more of a long-term relationship and have I think
you know I look at it like we have the night off maybe
family the bat movie is a movie about dressing nice I guess and having nice nice Rafi
what’s a left-wing critique of spite of his
bring him up bring him up
I asked you if you want to come up and do do do a 3-minute endorsement of Kingsman I just I just found it to be a profoundly but it’s it’s it’s it’s it’s fairly controversial and here’s why because it’s it’s childish nonsense and then every time they make a movie that includes child not to divorce a dinosaur a robot in it or a lady with no feet or it’s based on the comic books which is everything out like cuz then we all feel like it’s religion and we all have to argue about it like it’s late like it’s all the sudden like it’s important whether you have the refuse a Jew that has a curly thing easier whether you had the special half or both like it becomes high-stakes like when Nerds encounter each other in the over cigarettes in the alley about the fucking movie that came out for us like like this is a good thing or a bad thing I’m 42 it’s a whole different topic from it’s just like these movies are just getting dumber and dumber I’m telling you I’m sorry I didn’t like Guardians of the Galaxy
just I’m so bored I’m so tired I just like I just got I just play Minecraft and I just I just go to sleep I just I just don’t think that I think that I think that movies are for just a few people who is the third movie you say none if it’s a third movie of seeing that it’s good you know the third movie I saw was like like Diehard I was like you know something have you seen Boyhood no I haven’t seen it a really good movie good movies
generally good movies like I’m never in the mood to watch him cuz that late cuz I was going to break my heart now make me want to kill myself and the Oscar for best actress for best supporting the supporting address things I really like about me is I’m how much I care about other people when they’re introducing a new our cat to us when I got here you go because it’s a great like she’s come a long way because people are finally starting to recognize her as your daughter lines of the SUV
is our cat is a real Carnation of for me to go from 11 Professor a tattoo not
what were you what what what was the what the fuck
we accidentally
okay is there any way
is there is there any way to tell the Carnation story I think I’ll have time is past right okay all right so so just don’t let this get out of the room
we did the creation story animation for Incarnation like he’s like this is a carnation of that and
his words I was listening to his meaning and more and I was like fuck him and I I finally I burst out I was like and I finally found I said it’s not a carnation can I see them on the corner of my eyes kind of like black bearing their heads and like and I’m like and I think they’re making fun of me I’m like I’m sync Carnation instead of out loud I said our nation what am I a fucking retard, I have no idea I was repeating David Arquette’s mom
Hero III was just what I thought life was a movie that you’re working on right now well it’s a lot of the people from Mystery Show are working on something it’s not it’s not going to be on HBO Bobbitt Bob and David are doing a sketch show in a lot of the original writers are are doing it and I don’t know where it’s going to be at they’re not telling me but but it’s going it’s going to are somewhere and we are doing it a sketch show and yeah
you better hurry said probably everyone Spencer out
can you roll those guys pictures
hey guys it’s Spencer Spencer I like your haircut do you know I woke up one morning in New York and drink a half a bottle of vodka and chopped it all by yourself yeah that’s impressive it was a work-in-progress for a while with scissors oh yeah probably
nice time with lesbian legs
I don’t think they say that that’s the myth that does not work for haircuts
I always always always always fantasize about that you look in the mirror and you go I mean come on I want you to do what you don’t care how you look I mean that now I guess I do but but when I was a kid I did it once and then I got a shame for it while you’re married now why would you care how you look for a major
I’m going to go to South by Southwest are you at right now
for Yahoo have been following you for the show the show is rolling out so there is going to be pictures of me and it looks like an!
And we’re doing a harmontown from South by Southwest right we’ll be there that’s good news for you guys
we’re flying you out Spencer was like to hear about what’s going on with you in the world of current events o
so many things I’m I’m really I’m really just firing on all cylinders today what currently I am currently going on geopolitical beef I just heard a radio commercial on the radio for lifts the car share service for Lyft Lyft and it was just a really got my go okay let me try something else I listen to listen to their views fix my headlight but the truth is they’re flat tax or is there really a very nice and makes a lot of sense know okay I listen to you really really they really Niger tarika
she had I can’t I mean it’d be shocking if you didn’t say it I know that’s what I was thinking
shut up from the peanut gallery the black guy over the centre-back days when they were when they were joking about your dick big is a 20-sided dick
I couldn’t I couldn’t tell you but you already like where you secretly granting I was to say I was openly
it wasn’t like there’s any yeah no no starter few genetic Creature from the D&D universo what do you call it that is aqua
I thought you I thought you just meant to pick a monster that it was the most like yeah we can describe it sure
looming in the distance
heavy with the mosque of 14 Woodland creatures
floating imperiously through the forest path it’s I don’t know just from a distance
I think that’s a good cover you can’t tell I really like the dramatic music and and him sing I don’t know what you want to go to trap your dick then yeah
from a really far far but a place away so far that you can’t tell that it’s two men

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