Episode: 141 – The Jews Abide

Episode

Episode: 141 – The Jews Abide

Description

Its HarmonBlock 2015, some of us really had ADD and we adhere to the wisdom of Sam Elliot on HARMONTOWN! Become a member! Get the video at harmontown.com

Transcript

here’s a new song by a band I don’t know called celestrium
from Hollywood California Meltdown Comics meltdown theater harmontown
please welcome to the stage the mayor of Hermantown mr.
thank you very much
I was I was Minecraft a guy I didn’t I’m not really ready to do the show what happened recently in Minecraft as you left Minecraft I have a new base that I built up in the sky it’s a cube of Marvel and an inside of it is a glass room with these powered Spawners the creates zombies bring zombies in the world and then there’s these machines on all sides that immediately murder them all of their brains and Flash go through conduits into a central chest underneath that chamber and then I just finished making an elaborate system that like a serial killers like electorate like turn of the century World Fair Murder Castle like sorts their armor and melt it down into gold and you know anything that they were carrying a guy sort it all out
where did into a tesseract that funnels down into these bats and that is combined with sugar for these fields of cane that I have going on the roof of my Cube so that so that cube is a cubit marble with lips like sugar cane growing on the roof and it’s just being constantly harvested and that could turn into sugar and sugar is combined with the zombie flesh and from a nutrient juice that powers my whole operation by these these generators that thank you thank you you should apply
1939
harvesting flesh to Powerade or it’s just make you feel a little but but they’re created by me like you normally they harvest their flesh and brains as I’ve got that happens when you first get the game I’m playing zombies murder them and harvest their parts to fuel your War engine zombie generator that generate 80 Redstone Flex Points of energy per ticket tickets aren’t as a tenth of a second I think
and so each David generator generate a t and I have like just a wall of them are they all take in this Vale run of this nutrient nutrient distillation and then they funnel that energy into a big giant capacitors and then that that that charges everything like my job talking stuff like that person element to this while you’re flying around it’s a first-person experience flying around sky cloud zombie is is there any companionship is there is there anybody out there just you out there the zombie screams of there
I usually put it on YouTube the little disturbing and I keep my keep my bedroom far away from where you can hear their cries of Anguish and confusion I’m sure they’re very confused yeah it’s pretty
what what is I’m not saying this to be a smart-ass you like what is the payout never going to end. It’s never going to end in yet no I did not win yet
I mean what what is the what is the what’s the visceral experience of that like getting fatter and it’s it’s it’s it’s a world where every decision you make can can result if you choose it to the perfect order and perfect organization it’s like that I took zombies and I turned them into electricity and II and their their their pants get turned into gold I just everything is you know there’s a place for everything and you just sort things and build you can you can create anything it’s like you know it’s like digital Legos and that’s a that’s I need that in my life cuz you know I don’t I don’t need nobody has that in real life that’s the your dick is right the rest of life is too disheartened to to come out and help help my wallet and and like there’s a guy like
your wallet and your like ice kind of smaller than me I think I’ll I’m going to do the right thing here and then you go up and go to trick you or like a
we’re like I’ve got a pair of people that do this and take his black Jenkins blood just get out of here I’ll be there generated by the auto spawner our friend Danny from South by Southwest is here tonight you think you think she she was taking her Minecraft games you would say give me spinal stenosis like she’s here Annie okay there
hello Annie
people didn’t like my offhandedly abusive you as an analogy
I’m so glad to hear you were going to be here to schedule a l a trip of a coincidence or did you live here what were you doing in South by Southwest
is it easy enough to move that table so she can she needs her walking
oh really okay you can do it let’s walk over to wherever she is
hello Annie
resplendent in pink sweater and pink bow okay so we met you at South by Southwest which was very loud and I didn’t listen to the broadcast I don’t know if it was like she lives for their listeners or anyting I couldn’t tell cuz last time we were there it was the same thing but then I listen to hear like a crowd sound effect of a map had to address that we went over to the bar a thousand times and said keep it down did we send you over there at some point
and she was like I’m really cheering her on an errand what is the best because she would go over and be like Oh shut the fuk up I don’t know I got to figure out where we we we got to ask more questions before we go back to South by yeah I thought this time standing around the bar and have drinks and you stand there and talk to people at the bar because obviously you can’t really hear with those people at the bar they were not talking about like the key wallet some stuff we asked you about your your walk and then found out you have this tragic spinal stenosis give you were walking down the hall one day and fell down and found out you’re not going to be able to walk over again it’s going to get kind of kind of
and and then and then it came up that you’re a you’re a biggie Annie Edison fan and that your name is Annie but one in and that you’re you have a Blog where you talk about what Annie where’s and that you were bummed out about the move from skirts to pants which I move I made to be a decent human being
logic behind all of it you were just wrong I’m looking at you know that character outfits differently. Going like I do that old innocent schoolgirl thing on my leg that character is is growing and changing so I thought like Willow she is she just like in this stasis you know does she just have like 11,000 you know short skirts and pairs of tights and a cardigan sweaters look in the closet with the phone there’s a there’s a couple of scenes where she’ll she’ll be she’s dressed in accordance with your wishes you you got you got you actually connected you with our wardrobe supervisor and
do I have overwhelming and also you’re associated with me so as the people that work underneath me are not big fans of the of the last night was the wrap party for season 6 and it’s always a tradition or a I come up with a new way to promise that I’ll figure out how to run a show and all the new people are like
and all the other Rhonda the prop Master for 6 years is over in the corner like if she smoke she just had a cigarette
he’s really learning already shot the last episode
somebody released a picture of like everybody on set and then somebody did it did it all right did we get it right
glorious sent me pictures of two outfits literally in the combinations that they were in on the show so they do all the items had previously been warned and only show what I said was because it was my amazing costume designer
Welcome to Hollywood Anna
straight to meet her stuff I did have it I did have a little bit of a shit head fish it had shit fit tantrum I remember on the way to a meeting cuz I was like looking at these emails and I was like wait what there was a picture of a black sweater and I and I was like the only thing I remember is a purple sweater that’s all I was at all I know I could have I could have like how is that the one thing that’s different and then they said that you were like in contact with that was right after a point I was like okay as long as I look like a good person
Spencer got in contact with me actually and then and I also talked to Kevin and somebody else and things worked out what do you heat up a little warm in here you know why very popular podcast
it’s like zombie generators
power a marble base with this this room has brains and Flash
everything doubt it down on the earth is your home base it takes in or fixing everything you know like with like multiple play about function of the aesthetic of function is like when you look at it you’re like this case functioning and he doesn’t give a shit but they still had a couple of columns when I’m finished with everything being working at I make I could take a chisel and I can make some some things you can’t do you like it now I’ve no idea what we’re talking about graduate from
is the heights of whatever you wanted that you would like to start becoming like an artistic yeah yeah I would save that for last night in the corner with the plants in it but up until the moment when your a guy why would you care if I saw out the distance giant building right well I would just be a big shoot you would see first of all you would go oh my God what happened like cuz there’s a giant rectangular hole in the Earth where I just know I built an Ender Corey and I just put it on you know Diamond upgrade and it just cussed just like scoop up the Earth down to bedrock so this is lava and so far so far that’s ancient Rome
yeah it’s just like you’d be like oh my God what a horrible monster did all this and then you’d look up on the sky I just go is that the sun no it’s my home I live in the sky marble cube in the sky yes I do
I like that that’s good do you play Minecraft
play video games I do but I’m actually really addicted I don’t know if anybody knows this really old game that was on Lennox called chip challenge
Persian in the Microsoft entertainment I just discovered that some amazing humans with way too much time on their hands have all these level packs and you can actually play on the iPhone so that’s actually what a waste of my time on is playing this like fake version of chat cuz it’s like it’s like my childhood on my phone looks like it’s a it’s a two-dimensional and you have to collect chips in the original game in the knock off at school and then but it’s all puzzles like you have to like push the block into the water to make sure the preacher doesn’t come get you and start selling my crafts grimly tricky I mean they’re just ridiculous
they are amazing. It’s like and it’s like the perfect graphic Trafford iPhone is there a little data downloading how do you know if your vibrate
do you hold your phone out until my wife is texting me before I brought it out question why did the Sailor bring iron and gold into his boat answer he needed oars
I like the director the show is taking it like like it really has become Our Generations Prairie Home Companion including
including the board of blueberry pie I went to church I need it’s kind of like if you’re wondering why would anyone to watch this which is what you do ask
communities done yeah yeah I wrap them community of editing now I was there yesterday at the eye at CVS Bradford and Lee at where you shoot Whose Line Is It Anyway it’s literally The Sound Stage directly above where the community so the hallway we are guessing it was our it goes Ryan Stiles Jeff Winger has the character names and he’s a real prison
using reference to make you know a character named Ryan so it said vacant clean room
I’ve been there like several weeks when it said like occupied like. Don’t come in here this is Annie’s room this is Jeff’s room is abed’s room and now the food is like okay you can come in and clean it up and this is like blood everywhere
statistics dead hitchhikers tons of a tic-tac-toe game is played in his own poop that Harvey Keitel character that works at Yahoo comes in and looks it over to the cleaning crew cover it up make it disappear what were the numbers last night $15 sir
make it so it didn’t happen
by the way
everybody in the world watches Community now we know now that we’re not being measured by an eel system
I probably should have made the season better but I was that our support from the other side but you finding out that because Nielsen is so flawed that more people are watching you then you saw there’s a fundamental way it’s like guests guests who wants to fill out a diarrhea what they watched him sell it to Coalgate Jay Leno’s audience does a dying species of Television viewer and then there’s this sought-after demo called the Western water hose it’s one of these college kids what are we called Millennials upscales roamers sand people I don’t know what their
Tampa’s Nerf herders
Lobos cranks
but that yeah they don’t want to sit and watch TV at TV surprise surprise knows how to count the clicks guess what the holy shit like you always knew how many people I can’t say
I want because of Yahoo’s business-like I don’t realize they were there that’s their business like you know like they are that’s their I don’t know how they they’re they’re not necessarily going to like to publish you know like that was Nielsen’s like business was we ran into where this contractor and everyone give us money and then we’ll announce your ratings will be like this referee that was their business Netflix is not doing that their private you know saying can I go how many people are watching the House of Cards fuck you you would do you think house of cards as a good show do you feel like everyone’s watching it and yes or no there’s no commercials do they have to tell advertisers obviously so I’m not really too drunk and wrap party
enough for me to go holy shit that’s what I always would have guessed * 243 then whatever that is not a totally effective tabulation of viewership over time we’ve gotten caught in this cycle or it’s like the whole point of the Nielsen system is advertising so if they’re not watching commercials who cares if they’re watching but the create all the creative one is four numbers of people to watch their show that’s how you measure their success and so now we’re this weird you know flux. Where it’s like OK lifeless 7-Day life was 30-day fucking like them what they’re like lifeless 30-day what who gives the exact Yahoo knows more information than the CIA about like they are on the internet
babe they just have like clouds and bell curves and things like their there they’re like here’s the amount of people that are emotionally moved to purchase things by looking at one of Alison Brie feet you know like that they don’t like they’re not worried about views and like like like the week of and the night of in the month of thing people purchase when you look at one of her face
it says you’re just using a classic example and Kumail tweeted it at one point he said his goal is to become so successful that that one of the glue or the Google autofill ins is Kumail nanjiani the typical thing for female celebrities how you doing are you all right
will there be a season 7 or is that it I don’t know what do you want are you allowed to say
I don’t I really don’t know I just
yeah I know you want to play Minecraft and I know that if let’s say there was a clamor and a great gnashing of teeth and wailing for another season of Community anybody either by a Yahoo or by the fans or whatever would you say yes under certain circumstances
do I have liquid mouth
I can’t I can’t say there’s a perfectly normal thing
there’s an answer question right now
I think I should drive it I think it’s kind of evading the question
I’m just under certain circumstances like I imagined I would hang out
it involves him hating Jews last and coming back to life and like maybe being a timeline where he didn’t kill a bunch of people and like having a full mustache and he’s not Hitler anymore he’s just Sam Elliott
and Jeff would it go if Sam Elliott was in charge of the Third Reich
you know the Jews are a bunch of assholes
the Jews by the Jews abide
yeah so very popular television show very popular in no necessary order let me throw some fucking variables that you just Alison Brie want to do the actors contractor up you know that that is a big deal so let’s say ratings are good Yahoo bring it back do you say fuck that shit with do you say but but but different I have to get my head out of my ass and learn how to run a show so that
that you are so good they are nudity Buzz that you piss off around of the Prophet lady or she’s on your team is always hard it’s hard to work for me because I like this is like the script come in last minute and so if you’re the person that makes the pants that you’re like I can’t make good pants now cuz I just saw that this purse is work pants that if I’d known they were running pants a week ago I could have made the best aunt ever
I like working the way that I work but but I’m not bringing out the best in the people that work for me you know like they don’t get a chance to like look at a script in like pants huh
I got an idea they just have to be like
what’s that in the wardrobe Department the pants people they have like that that’s serious drama about that for all the hell I put everyone through it’s always the Wardrobe people that I like
you challenge me
and I like the results
take it easy like worst case scenario with a bunch of naked beautiful people on TV
everyone wants that anyway
they also come with their own clothes
but they couldn’t pull out a purple fucking cardigan Dragon of too much there’s only so many wardrobe people in the in the city you know
but our production designer our prop Master our wardrobe supervisor they’ve been through their old Veterans of the harm in effect and there’s some great ladies on the real heroes I forgot my shoes last night at right right before getting dressed for Whose Line us as taping it was Wednesday anyway and getting dressed I look in my bag I forgot my shoes at home and I go to the work of people like and they ran to Marshalls and bought me some shoes that were a good size too small so I sent the PA to my place and he got stuck in traffic for the first two hours before our taping really small shoes and then I kept playing Jar Jar Binks in a game and and Wayne Brady kept coming and cutting my throat cuz he hates Jar Jar Binks
Jose
so I have to say this
there’s you when you’re working and you’re in your manic like the shit to get done mode and then when does you and you’re not working and it’s you you see that the entire show is the first time you’ve been seated as long as it because we were in it doesn’t matter if the guest is is is able to run laps around the stage at one of you I’m sitting I had a girlfriend once I swear to God
she was she told me about it shows you as in she used to perform for these that there was this guy that that that that had somehow stumbled into the kind of like gold mine of writing special shows for school kids I think I could maybe talk about this in the podcast before but like she was a couple of the shows are like he would write these look like educational shows and he’ll be like musicals and one of them that he wrote was for it was like to do it now this is where the language uses because of what is the point of your raise awareness is it to comfort is it to benefit but it just has that he didn’t it just had that specialness Vibe on it because there was like this show you wrote that was about a kid in a wheelchair who goes to a magical land where everyone is a car
insinuation is like like a kid come back and now I feel better about just stays there but he’s happier cuz everyone else that has wheels right for children play it’s just like a kid in a wheelchair that gets transported to heaven took our world and the cars are like they have these car songs and she would shoot a couple of a memorized every word he’s there with the traffic jam Dooley dividend by this guy and his career
anyways that’s that’s what that made me think about the idea that I would be sitting for your for your benefit to help you out like a magical car you brought any up just so you can sit down and rest up just so I can sit down because when the guests come up I can’t stand there so yes I often bring people up so I can sit down and I’m like what the world’s greatest show runner cuz I am totally turned purple sweater it’s just the headlines you know tomorrow TMZ Dan helps Annie all right
crazy lazy sit down rapper
I wanted to talk I wanted to search through something I blocked Adam Goldberg on Twitter
and I can’t really remember why I just know that I did
I know I did
I don’t know if anybody if it’s possible to give you all of your Foods in the audience like if somebody can pull up like a timeline and look at like cuz I had always hashtag when I block somebody I had to take it harm in Black 2015 and so if you I don’t know if you can find the what he said right before I did that I’m so curious like what he did wrong was it because he’s too because it was too many things and it was like it was like it was just I wasn’t it was in the wrong mood at the wrong time like I said something like I do I was in the certain Zone and like said something and then he he was like snarky and. Connect to you about it later and I was just like you fuck you you fucking jackass
oh okay yeah
oh yeah okay so I was just in a pissy mood I tweeted like an anti Millennial sweet I said I said Remember When Millennials were eight years old and we said that they’re the future and now it’s the future and sure enough for all fucking 8 years old and then he then I don’t know what he said he said like well can you elaborate on that and I said you can you live without a source of something to react to fuck you harm and black
but you have a hashtag
sorry what
oh that’s what I said to him feel free to exist as a collection of reaction
I should look at that mess that’s better
hey do you miss traveling with your besties like a girls trip do you miss going a huge family gathering Viking soul food do you miss meeting the parents so I can get out well actually, never misses that but you can still do all of these things with me Desmond Thorne on my podcast adventures in Black Cinema each week I take you on a journey through a new black film how it relates to the culture and sometimes have the themes relate to my own life so it’s always a little tea and a slight bit of embarrassment and of course as a filmmaker it myself and one of the blackest Phil nerdiest film nerds like ever you’re always in good hands
adventures in Black Cinema with Desmond Thorne executive-produced by Amanda seales new episodes every Tuesday on all major podcast platforms
thank you I actually heard two different people called me to tell me about hashtag Harman black 2015 is necessary in life like a chicken I got the 80d real bad
steady as a rock
pretty shooter this happens at the 80d real bad
does it does it get you high like stay awake to finish writing and now as a so now I wake up and like cuz I have to taper off of it because it’s like otherwise my eyelids are like and like it’s it’s it’s it’s it’s exactly what you would think of is just a cartoonish inversion of what you get from the pill is like that you’re if you’re coming off of it it’s like holyshit I’m really tired and super able to focus weight knows what do I take it for focusing
Annie y110
actually it’s it’s short for my legal name my name ends in an I8 and at some point or my friends and I thought it was clever for me to go by and look for all those girls in the world whose name ends with an i e r a n y you know the Tiffany’s the Britney is all the stuff your Stephanie all the way
I was going to guess if I was able to really into the Anne of Green Gables book is kind of like an and I can be that kind of dark and white women
it seemed like a good place to stop bro
yeah
all right well I don’t I don’t want you cooking up here and I got a number to bring me to bring out more people I think so give me a hand for a knee and do you need help getting down
all right
now that she’s gone again stand up again
turn the mock anybody standing up the horse Michelle
I thought maybe it would give me a little boost of energy because God knows that medicine will kick in till midnight
detective did you feel like kicking in not these days I don’t like I was wallpapering my apartment at 4 a.m.
I got I got shit to do with so don’t take it for a really long time believe I always assumed like that if that if it’s having that effect on you that means you don’t have a DD right but she takes it and her memory comes back right side goes to bed at 9 p.m. or 10 p.m. because I got a real prescriptions I was like they were positive effects that had nothing to do is stay away and Spencer’s Spencer’s kind of convinced that I that I have ADD but you know that’s just coming from his expertise
as a dungeon master should we bring them out and talk to you about my ADD

hey
hey guys how’s everybody doing
that’s good what do you base your at your findings that Dan might have ADHD or add it’s funny I almost didn’t come in cuz I was just explaining to demorge the answer this very question my little brother and apparently I’m pretty ATD according to doctors and stuff I don’t know if anyone buys that but so I mean we all have abs
but I see why, I’ve seen
well that’s my doctor that all those are two totally different. Yeah but I know I work with the guy I see his his behavior is Antics that work in this area to me it just seems like a guy who has a d d a no no offense Daniel do great work but just your mannerisms they seem very deficit in terms of attention
what do you do what do you think what would it what what what’s your view of the Season like like like like like people are probably curious like what what happened you know you’re sitting in sitting there the whole time what happens about my work
no I mean I I don’t know it’s this site I feel like people say it is just like it so it’s all it’s all coming from you I mean obviously the writers do great work but at the end of the day everything that is on screen is happens because of something in your brain and as such you know it’s it’s lame to give the other writers credit
Spencer what is your day today tasks at the show okay so I get it usually dance still sleep or he’s Ambiguously in his office pretend potentially asleep so I don’t want to bother him in, do you know anywhere from 7 a.m. to 9:30 he depends on how and when I when I determine that he is in fact awake I try and ask him what he needs or needs if you need coffee or food or something and then I I go do that and I sit around and I basically repeat that routine for you know the whole time it’s great and other than that I’m just sitting around and listening and observing and how you in the writers room office and there wasn’t as many chairs I would sit in my room is right outside the office and the walls are like paper thin so I can hear everything all at all times
and yeah did you feel like you have Ambitions to like write your own stuff and I meant maybe have a show your of your own yeah definitely I just don’t think I am like good at anything so I don’t know if I could do it at your time listening to the walls at Community might have prepared you in some way or have you learned stuff certainly I think knowing how well I don’t know if it’s something that they’re going to like look at and be like oh we got to get this guy but I think that it’s certainly something that does actually help because you have us you have an expectation you can understand the pecking order in just a for the workflow and how things go so I mean I think it’s it’s valuable for that reason also you know you learn you learn about writing
why are you writing your own stuff now
I’ve written a couple things but I got off the wagon and the reason why I’m not a stand-up or a writer is because I stand up for the mind to get up and they write jokes that they want to get up and do material and writers wake up in the morning go I have it I want to make a job out a guy that doesn’t sting or a girl that does this thing I don’t think in terms of ideas like that are you one of those people at night do you think of premises premises I think of ideas in terms of like traps and monsters usually
so it’s it’s kind of it takes some creative work to turn that into like a script for a joke and character development in creation and certainly trap development I guess I think about things and then it’s like oh yeah and the pizza Story Goes at it. It has this guy and he you know has a mom that he’s paying for cancer or something
other people get it for free but
no buts so just you know LeBron building
but so that’s that’s usually how my mind goes and I would like I would like to show a Spencer like busting traps or I don’t know
best of trap trap trap trap idea of light traps like people traps when you came to me that the junior head of the network and said without hurting people with the straps I think we’re trying to evade traps and maybe it was the first thing I know is we got to get Spencer Crittenden.
they have they have they have these like things that you can go to you don’t like those games we were talking about missed you know they have those games on the iPad like keep the room as the room yeah like escape the room was the name of the genre is at like like like they have live action Escape the Room like eventually you can you can buy a ticket to and go to and you’re like in a room and there’s like a guy chained up like a zombie and the chain is getting gradually longer I guess it’s fine it’s not fun it’s horrible when did one can you come and talk to us about what are you willing to come okay come on up I just want to hear it
Mission Inn
hello what’s your name
Jennie Garth
does it does it does it by Migos out when I switch mics like that back there are Pros
sparkle pants we went to one of these live-action puzzle game things a boy this is not the vendors fault
that’s like I have no idea if if Wicked is a good player and a data wonderful
you go in and it’s a bunch of goofy actors in New York
nice dance dance during the world’s least merited camera take
yeah that made way more something to me there’s nothing but actors here in New York as a couple people who selling fish
it’s just like a big building then you go through all the rooms in are you with a group of people of people that are like pretending to give you a hard time but like they’re paid for Farmers that are like look
he likes and like I’m not going to say what race that guy is
but he’s wearing a flannel shirt and I got what I got thermal shirt underneath it he’s like salt-of-the-earth reminding you that your privilege didn’t like that that’s the first text message
I was out I would give course I was yes Aaron told me about a thing where you pay like a Halloween Horror thing where you pay and then you go and it’s it’s it’s like a tour guide what am I doing that thing minutes ago it’s for it’s for Minecraft in all night
it’ll kick in halfway through an episode of Empire because I’m not focused
the the I forgot my Alzheimer’s medication you go to a haunted house but like year it’s like a zombie apocalypse but you’re like LED through this thing by like the SWAT Team guys who are like survivors they go they come on
closing in here like a note in a bomb shelter kind of situation and you like run from point-to-point with like these guys that are like have guns and stuff in there but they’re like performers but there’s then there’s not that I doubt that’s the only thing I’ve ever heard of that sounded kind of fun like I thought I would enjoy doing except for the running and fix that roof like a murder mystery thing or like you you’re like oh I’m Professor Johnson and I I I I I I I need to I need mobile
like if there was a little bit of role-playing to it maybe and you kind of did it with your friends so you can give him $1,000 if you take 80 your friends you go in and then they like like like like okay okay so you getting dropped off in a shuttle shuttle how do you get dropped off for like a little beach or something and then like you put there’s like a like a pretends he’s like downbeat thing that’s going on inside Happy Birthday Jeff for their like on a beach and you’re like they just another is like like a zombie attack but just sort of stayed like waves there’s a guy who’s in your party that you know he’s like a redshirt in Star Trek like he’s on the bus with you show me I’m Gail and everyone’s like yeah I don’t like jail wanders off and like he gets he gets attacked horribly by a zombie like
cops or soldiers come up and go to a shelter and then I don’t know who to feed the zombies or something or
so you get to the get to the room and then they go they got you going to solve a puzzle games where it’s like there’s a doormat and there’s actually reach it it yes what actually is just as physical kind of perceptiveness real live version of a point-and-click like they’re over everything she’s like I’d drag your hand across the room until a single turned around so I was like the smartest person in my group time there’s a box on the top of the dresser that has a key in it and it’s got like a like a clock makes another key come out stupid
all right Jenny is Jenny cargo pants mushrooms all the problems Fargo account needs an intervention yeah that’s my bad for you but you’re going to big hotel in the 20s jazz club you walk in and you get split up from your people and you put a mask on and you walk the rooms and you’re encouraged to go snoop through drawers and like like a look around and read stuff and I got to the first 45 minutes nothing was going on with this sucks and then you hear some commotion and stuff and then you start watching you watch a murder then everyone gets naked dancing around is great
yeah everywhere you go that happened
what’s like a McDonald’s
that’s not going to happen to any of us
well not with that attitude so Aaron is at home right now because the Nigel the grease dog the new dog he ate the pile of Harvey’s hair
and so all his paws why is there a pile of Harvey’s hair little hair cuts haircut so there’s a pile of shaved hair from Harvey so Nigel ate Harvey’s hair and then he was his poops have like ropes coming out of Ender in the poem
like he’s acting like he’s a British Christmas popper
but there’s no that you don’t get a whistle and I got anything
my dad are going to have the age of a shoe shoe liner install and it came out like a perfectly spiral poop shaped straight to this dog’s body and came out as a shoe liner is amazing
I’m wearing it right now
scary pictures of dogs that that that are among us like they are the descendants of the dogs that mutated the ability to just eat anything and not die almost except Harvey had an incident with a with a fans of the rice crispy treats I told you guys about that and an errand has to physically pull them out of his butt cuz it hurts his little tuchus to
hurts donut maker poops in the middle of getting trained how to poop so he’s like a god this is what I’m supposed to do you care where I do this it hurts don’t do that in the wrong place he’s like it hurts it’s all the wrong place
hair that’s a hungry dog supposed to feed them for the first seven months
now there’s your problem there’s your problem is like the way the words break down it’s like I need it was the equivalent of the six that turns into a nine I haven’t fed my dog in 7 months
fired corner
are you happy I don’t even know I don’t even know what a weight off your shoulders or how do I seem like I am what I’m doing I’ve no idea what I like I don’t know who likes me I don’t know if Chris McKenna hates me or if he loves me I have no idea I sent that because nothing is to be like you know like corny but like I feel like your identity is often what you’re working on it when you’re working and it was over do you feel like there’s a like a suspension of my identity yes it’s called workaholism which sounds productive but like I can also just be that’s just like a slob who like only knows who he is like he does that make you
for the wild
yeah which has me working digitally you know so I know who I am by my marble to chill and have a have a nice I’m going to go to Barcelona with air and they invited us out for a film festival television Festival kind of think they’re going to treat this real nice it’s kind of a working vacation cuz I’ll do a lot of press in Spanish
what it what it what it what what is that that’s a dialect they speak in Barcelona Spanish back to you in Catalan
yeah you’re good to go
you cannot be a fucking vegetarian in Barcelona cuz it’s simply ham all they fight they will put a bit of ham on everything you get a motherfuker for 10 minutes in Spanish about my pay and pay and it still have sausage and shrimp
he’s eating some of your vegetables like strippers like use me
I wonder if anyone really does like ham the whole cities based on ham you going to hang in the window I could grow in Ireland like that this is for the Viking tile grout or something like that or any other meat ham
well there’s a Hamza fourth one and I just think it’s like the the the early 90s Fox network of have meats
not a contender they just they haven’t gotten their Simpsons yet like that it’s just like just it’s just garbage you know it’s just seems like a dumb meet
salami salami sausage
it’s a spicy pork meat I’m angry about it
animals that have like IQ higher than some of the people at work in California who fly in a plane in California look out the window and look at all the reservoir empty is no fucken water here and yet we have tons of water to grow Alfalfa with what we feed cows and it takes like a fucking ton of Acres of of alfalfa to make a couple pounds of meat in this ridiculous like it’s completely insane and that’s an environmental thing that’s just a fucking bug there man so I can send it to it’s a bogey
human muscle mass man
but I hear tell the beef is like a big boy
it’s 9:11 make a wish or what are we doing out here
I thought you’re dissing is every week you forget
okay or no we make it when we were just talking about set against the backdrop of 911 but it’s about something else about no doubt that’s the don’t go there there’s an urban legend about firefighters stealing jeans during that 11:00 is not true from the Conchords underneath 911 and there was like yeah it’s an urban legend is that there’s this guy that wrote a book about Ground Zero at like like like there was there was a urban legend the developed where they found a fire truck filled with jeans from the gap
and it’s always ridiculous urban legend because it’s like can you imagine being a firefighter during 9/11 and you’re like
this is so silly I was just for every everything we hold sacred someone has to like create some kind of thing it’s just like we have a great Smith ology notion is completely on verifiable that they they Unearthed in the rubble a fire truck and it was filled with jeans
I can feel it clear the room but doesn’t translate over electronic fibers like we’re laughing at the laughing because it’s bad and people are good and firefighters are great at like we were the last we’re not laughing like at 9:11 but I’ll take it to you just get you like we’re in the Rick and Morty writers remember talking about this for 3 hours it was a firefighter Steelers jeans developed a whole movie about about a firefighter what was it what was the movie called size fits all
but if I want to I want to talk about it was just to clean up the poster I remember the poster I drew the New York skylines with two legs of jeans that became
00 and the title and I remember the title firefighter who survived 9/11 with a bunch of jeans and and he goes around the country he gives a pair of pants to eat the family of of a victim of 911 and they magically all fit like Traveling Pants Redemption
we developed the whole movie we did not work on Rick and Morty for a half a day we were just crying laughing acquire all of The Concourse underneath the World Trade Center that has at least doors and stuff and there was like they said they were looting before they really realize the gravity said it was it’s not true it’s not a real story it was it was printed in a book by a guy who did not verify the story he just kept hearing it but every type of a person you heard it from is not a verifiable urban legend so he printed it became like a real Google or Yahoo
fire firefighter pants 911
it’s much more than I could without even looking for you can find your horoscope you don’t even have to search for that I’ve been on Google what’s my horoscope Yahoo is there
are they have a whole section about Yahoo answers you ever want to know anything for a sixteen-year-old who doesn’t know anything
you can just go on there and go hey how much does a basketball cost in someone will go like why are you asking
go see a doctor
paid surveys Yahoo answers
you have to answer because some answers are bad as their slogan
ya Redemption
so when the people get the pants and then magically fits then they’re like okay thank you but
fucked up what you did and he’s like I couldn’t have any like we no like but everyone got pants that was affected by this the outfit that goes back home to Long Island Jewish family room Staten Island and he goes back home his wife and kids I sit there and knock on the door and I’ll take
that was by accident
or was it the Asian guy from Gremlins the guy that said that given the way those jeans that there’s a reason why they were hidden down there that Concourse beneath the World Trade Center Tower to Tower one because those jeans are cursed and there’s going to be other you pull back and there’s there’s Towers being built everywhere where you gave pants away
yeah and then that music place
what did you do what are you shaking your head for what did you expect I wanted you to launch into one of your famous fade ins on a fucking
what
first act as 9/11 happen to a firefighter gives away all the pants yes and at the end of the first act like Christopher Nolan yes the first message seems like you’re bigger than
James 3 hours of McConaughey in a bookshelf
I don’t see the movie
I’m a little Bolder now cuz it’s insights inside are that my grievances about Interstellar have a lot of people have come forward and thanked me for my bravery and said thank you I can’t I can’t say it you know I’m a I’m a PA
stunt coordinator in Ohio has to fall off that bookcase Nolan runs this town thank you thank you for saying that the that movie is a little silly
anyways your movie my movie is that the movie starts when it’s when the guy finds out that the pants he he gave away he thought he was doing a good deed is your movie is the guy going from town to town giving can’t have any emotional conversations late I would call that a road of trials for you it’s just like an Ordinary World with the guy with the guys right at the top of the Looting them from 911 911 the 911
and then he realizes all of his friends are dead and if any of you feel guilty about it so it goes and gives all those jeans away he’s only like my mission to travel the Earth you so he runs it as like like like I think you need to do it in flashback of your kind of cheating but you have to establish that this guy like your your Turk 182 a firefighter is like the city fax you over you know like like like you’re like the guy is like his dad is like it is I have to mention or his brother was just rip off
brother got hurt really bad being a firefighter and they didn’t give him compensation so likely he’s he’s going tonight at 11 like like you know pre predispose you to this is my last day as a firefighter and then they’re like they’re like Miss managing 911 somehow still in a Civic sense there like jokes but you’re like disillusion do I get to disaster and I know I know the big picture of this but from his perspective it’s like this is ridiculous like what is my job how do I know when I’m helping people or whatever and then he thinks cuz he’s like I’m going to I’m going to try and then he gets yelled at is that he’s like his boss goes like
3 people go in that room so you know what’s important
can you go to the room and it’s like a close down Gap looks up and it’s like Jen I’m gold the fluorescent lights are flickering and everywhere and then
I don’t know if it’s a job but it’s like like his his like dementia addled father is like being fed soup by his mom with her watching like all the coverage of the disaster like a week later and his brothers like a bird up in the corner going like I did when I got good thing I didn’t have to go to 911 I was like yeah but you get fucked up to you and they fuck you over and then he’s like how come how come you survived 9/11 he’s like I told you they made me go to the room or whatever to go downstairs and think about stuff that he does not have his bedroom in like his bed is surrounded by all these jeans and he’s watching on the TVs watching his funeral is like the 21-gun salutes in love
the fuck am I done I’m a Google I’m a horrible ghoul and answer then like the case of this is like seven minutes into the movie
Good Luck the credits are still going underneath as he like dry eye that I cut them onto a Director of Photography done anything but I did steal his pants and it’s fucked up it doesn’t make any sense it’s like that’s why that’s why karmically why the shit happens to us as a country is because of greed to accuse these pants back and and and I hope they fit you in at and she’s like I’ll be right back I don’t know if they will but I’m
but they better obviously you didn’t try and get you out here so she goes in the bedroom and it was like this which is a clock tick tick as he looked at the photographs of the Dead 911 people on it up the flagpole and he’s like he’s so that you always are. He’s like a voice his brother said it do it do it fucking kill yourself in piece of shit you should have fucking. You should be dead
takes a cork screw knees I got it under his under the deck and in the woman’s as yes I do want you to do it slowly turns and she’s like I do want you to keep giving out these pants cuz because they fit great I was about to ask you do I look fat in these jeans but I know what the answer is the answer is no I look fantastic. You doing a good thing here I suggest keep doing it and then I got to Take Me Home Country Roads around the country and their pants like
Joe you got to speed this up but certain why I was just like stacks of pants going down and like like like people accepting them talking to him like Cowboys or should I take the dance music
Cameron
play The Beatles video
making it seem like a fun like
I’m sorry the last that last person to be somebody because the pants don’t fit for some reason
because he lives in the Bronx and the last stop is like he’s like he’s like a kid but the real reason is because the kid will find out and paid 60 he lied he doesn’t he’s not a family of a Survivor you just want to pay okay okay I know I know it’s
it’s going to be shot by cops but he deserves the fucking pants because everyone has 911 going on all the time
it’s in it’s only now if you say that that I feel bad about my camera tricks in the sea so silly it would look silly because it’s the last pair and other kids like yeah I don’t know but they’re like kind of bagging units like the kids kind of a hasty like
but he said he’s at home with speech 16 he’s eating pancakes Dimension dad died while he was gone Brent brother is like still burn and likes
still like why are you here how did you survive at 11 so fucked up and I’m just going with your so there’s an old Chinese man that says like those pants were under 911 for a reason they’re cursed they caused 911
this is your idea. Well okay well they’re cursed was your idea that comes up that’s just too good to be true there’s a reason why they fit everybody
I think all those people he’s an army of people with magic James on
that they’re worse than 911
the whole movie of the guy that say Randall this is a mumblecore that what they call it mumblecore yeah it’s like one of those doopliss doopliss Brothers
disappointed and I thought you would be able to finish this off

so there you go okay I should go get them back and the Chinese guy goes no you can’t cuz that would be back in 40 so
so now all those people are going to they’re going to start fires are they going to be okay. Are they going to
what what wedding start heading people’s houses what does will play what if the gene Waring people like if they all do something horrible
it’s really more of a thinker and I am I moving at the end of the movie gives everybody to go give the pants back so it’s a whole quadrant of the circle is 911 which is what people want from the poster they’re like buying tickets to see this so that I can go to Kaufman from Rick and Morty he sent me a picture of the thing and I have I have the log line in the the title it’s really close you put the the tagline is Heroes come in all sizes here is coming outside which is also Willow I stole it from Willow but
and then it says Redemption colon pants on fire
because he’s a liar yeah
yeah
the pastor had to be cursed it’s like a journey of self-discovery like he figures out who he is why did he take those pants what the fuck is wrong with him so what did he find out at the end but what was he learned
anybody that makes more than me like like like billionaires
but then there’s nothing about it
I need a voice over
all these Magic
don’t deal with the magic pants why are they
Sisterhood they do it wasn’t it wasn’t it wasn’t like didn’t stop the moving go holyfuck the devil is real
it was a it was just the idea that there’s these girls like we’re bonded in a way they do every time they put on the pants I assumed that they stay fit
okay so they all fit when his when his like apology is real okay okay okay alright I got it so the goddess is like a hot woman and her husband died in 9/11 and he chokes up on the back like he changes a couple things in the pants don’t fit
he’s got it he’s got to come a hundred percent clean with the people he gives the pants too or they don’t fit and she’s like pot so he’s like tempted he doesn’t want to be a piece of shit then like cuz he wants to date her
so he kind of changes a couple details about his pants loaded and and his stake in 911 and she’s like oh so you’re kind of hero and he’s like yeah and then she’s like okay well as let’s go on that date I’m going to wear my new pants to the date this is a cool
we get so late
and then he’s like well here’s another pair just like these don’t fit either what the fuck is going on I don’t know why she’d be
he has to learn how to be honest I think they are
I also available later
we should always been like a maximum of 20 minutes developing the 911 right right let’s bring demarjay
Google Q tomorrow
an Autumn is here
I heard car jumper. Cancel the Channel 101 happened yes I was at my rat party for Community it is absolutely how many are you in 200 only if you like the Steve Buscemi gets its power by impact man delivered the little when you hit that’s it only a few hit everyone that you do but the but you know you can’t do everything, Honda Michigan
Power by choice I feel like because of the show the show seemed surprised been kind of a contemplatively do some Shadow run in a way it’s like we really get down to like getting some shit done
that damages for he passed out the the character sheet folders Atlas down the line but we need a mercy right or or are you saying even like I think we should do you say her face man for sure do we have somebody out there
hello there do you want to come up you would
get up here with a little girl
Hello
you can take the mic from up there
operator throw into the air at that last name
really awkward Monster High in a show when people apply for someone your first thought I was at a fix is in the brat 50 people
Julia Julia where you from originally Northeast Ohio Toledo I grew up with Amish so Cleveland and Maurice there’s a reason why I moved Sylvania thing and a lot in Ohio
yes sorry
if you’re lucky you might be a little high
oh that endears you to know there are like okay good
I’m almost regretting you insane
Aaron why aren’t you here now cuz the dogs pooping hairs do you want to switch dog string out of a dog anus alright well you’re quite a character and my God
did you get what I heard are you living in La I am a little over a year I kind of accidentally fell into working into thing I did the most which is podcasting and one guy really really funny and I really fortunate to work with some really funny people and happen I do this stuff them Anusha at you know I don’t know what it says
I’m a podcast assassin but I have to do voice work in things so yeah so I’m like why not try podcasting no real food please somebody else that would want to go back to build a time machine and nobody feels sorry for you but nobody I’m trying not to sit awkwardly where am I going to have to side saddle room
yes you’re looking at her character sheet you at you’re familiar with her with her attributes
see me after the show Tanked
what about me you’re there too there was pretty much or are you higher than hers she higher than you know
I have my answer differently that’s all
but let let let let laugh is like a I got the Warner Brothers sound effects Library woman laughing
from the sixties it is but it’s absolutely fine
you can apparently pick me up and we have we have we got one of those guys are here
at the Laughing guy. The controversy of Your Life podcast
you and me and thoughts and talk with Doug cult yeah it is he does laugh on it how can I say one more thing real quick I was actually listening the super-ego on the way over here and I had no idea Sam Elliott that’s one of my favorite bits with Sean MacGuffin no idea what I heard and I was like oh wait the Muppet one that’s sorry but here’s the status of your high your hair you’re about to play Shatter I want my advice to you is to let it wash over you to dig deep and as we play Shadowrun do we have a guest intro I think it’s by let’s be safe but again I just did a lot of people have been sending out a lot of people have been sending me in a lot of the ones I haven’t read were too long
Penguins curious wants to revise their work what’s a good range for length yeah I’m here in a tight ship over here we really do you do you should you’re allowed to thank you keep it around under minutes yeah no no offense it’s good stuff it’s all good stuff
asset to our video listeners
last time on harmontown Shadow town after completing their first mission the gang kick back for some much-needed R&R lounging around the pool table at their usual Watering Hole Hanks Last Stand in their favorite something after calming down he explained that the notorious feghouli crime family gets kidnapped his son jelly won over by his offer of 2000 New Year of peace and a pair of fancy Italian shoes are heroes accepted the mission to the retrieve jelly dervish the old man intimated that are turtles feghouli a big stupid dick might know something about the kidnapping getting resolved to confront Arturo at his favorite Eatery the burger Tyrant but will they find stupid Arturo the big dick will they use their weld home skills in
famous teamwork to extract information will they retrieve jelly Gervais with their usual discretion and Grace find out on a harmontown shadow time
thank you
I guess we’re on our way we’re on our way to a restaurant to the Uber Tire in
what what kind of vehicle are we in right now. Slowly drop away as the fifth to keep the meter running and pretend that you’re right as cancel charge you for a ride that you didn’t do it all of those things driving you happy like a dick that’s what they say how far are we from my Burger Tavern do we’re pretty close you guys should have just enough time to formulate a plan
Nightblade what you got
I just want to get strange my head to the sky is the one who might know where jelly is our choice but he’s a big dick
so we should probably lured him out so I figure out a way to get them by himself and I got to feel like a big prize surrounded by a lot of lot of guys sure if it really drives recontact how are you Fritz yes
don’t be aggressive with me
this is just my voice that person is there something that would bring him out since he’s been drinking a glass of water or is that some other sort of totem that we might bring him outside with to get him outside of his protection that’s a good question I don’t really know the guy personally I just put some put some you know some of my ears out and found out that’s where you might have better luck asking around elsewhere of Houston
who said small school that I could use another identity and perhaps go in and loading out myself it’s certainly possible that we could face the one to the right took me don’t know you’re not looking at me right now but the one to the right today
I figured this is Mercy’s time to shine
Mercy we’re just pulling up to three blocks away but there are a few times and I will say this I apologize for using Kilz time I will make this up to you later we have a plan we’ve come up with the runaround at quotation thanks man. With a Honeypot on the front end do you think it’s a good idea
seems to be the configuration okay alright I’ll be the honey pot supposed to know his sexual proclivities do we know you know what is Harbor Freight’s hours of sexual proclivities 58 deals in the currency
as well as the Honeypot over to our prearranged location
which is which is just out back of the burger time at night blocks away to pull up to the back of the door by the title
listen something’s up okay let’s stop. Should we stop a block away and I didn’t I didn’t go in we do it would you one of these other like we stage a she has a falling-out with her her boy and then I’m trying to figure out how to like why don’t you be the boy she’s going to get him out to the car if the simple version is she just get them out of the car and then we’re all in the car then more complex version is it going to be in further away but I think we just outside the building and then we brought us at this time so
another hour of unfocused
all right I will block away at Spencer alright Mercy I trust you implicitly really should go Knock Em Dead, Charisma and negotiations how much emotional spots are not to bring in the background but perhaps just staying close by in case things go awry yeah it may very well
so what’s the move gentleman and Lady show me are terrifically and try to find out and then get him out to the car with us walking in it
okay so I get to the Burger Tyrant walk-in what’s the surrounding World 3D printers squirting out grease and krill protein and recognizable shapes injected with flavor simulates and microwave it for Perfection to Perfection as the Pinnacle of the technology serving millions of day this location looks pretty new so it must have been rebuilt to the tyrants new security / hygiene specifications Standing Tall in front of the front door is a hologram icon of the burger timer himself his arms are open wide and keep her claims all are welcome but please oh please don’t leave your weapons and leave your weapons at home leave your weapons at home
cast of real Burgers is really into
just to be safe I asked her if I jacked alongside Mercy like to go alongside her into the burger Tyrant okay your ghost okay
try not to ghost block
so you step into that you step into the burger Tyrant it’s it’s a filthy joint it looks like it must be one of those up franchise locations rather than a Corporate Place specifically because the security detail is woefully substandard there’s usually about five armed guards on duty at your average Burger Tyrant hear you only see one he’s wearing a bulletproof vest is picking his nose
the second you walk into the door however you hear a piercing shrill alarm streak lights start flashing and going off right as you right as you enter the door and three fry cooks and the security guard all pulled guns in level pistols right at yet they say no weapons get out of here we’re shooting you to death no weapons law
no weapons is there some way I can just go outside do that then come back and we’ll give you burgers that sounds amazing thank you for complying I am just outside the door and ready to collect such weapons are taking them all
so I have no idea how do I have zero weapons okay I feel like I feel like I’m scared but I’m going to power through so I’m going back in there all right
you see the the the fried Cooks they’re not pointing guns at you anymore they’re just Milling about the auto fooders there’s a couple of folks just sitting with their meals you see Arturo’s feghouli seed in the corner he’s wearing a fine Italian suit and he’s eating he’s eating two burgers and two hands while he’s double-fisting both Meats
given the circumstances can I use my Common Sense instantly just to find out if there is any threat do there’s threat
the meat is always Cooks in this place talk to me it’s always
yes threats okay end of the comlink
okay
but a lot is like is like how many of these people are my friends that think they’re trying to kill you
I’m just as the man sitting in the van
all right what’s the move do I actually have I mean I said that I gave all my weapons
what is from Atlanta
just he would go
what’s up guys like
it was control my vocals
okay so I’m trying to get back on task back on the train story actually have a real question actually have like any hidden anything that I can get through is I mean is there a chance I could send something through just in case and metal detectors are highly highly elaborate you’d have to have a weapon designed specifically to bypass that security or hacking in Mercy ask him to go outside with you if that if that’s not going to work we’re going to come storming the place and kick ass
I just got to try and somehow convince him to come out just asked him if he would have to make the approach to go find his face
I tried that hours ago I apologize okay
okay so I’m going in there and this is Eve libertine tiger ghost right now
just talking I’m actually in there with you I got you if you want me to manifest and kick ass I can’t walk up to him and tell him what you want and try to get them outside alone
walk up to our chores bregoli and say he would you come outside with us you walk up to him and he’s got a mouthful of burger he’s he’s barely paying you any mind barely glances at you on the comlink I suggest you know how to do this the right way
anyone okay I like I like some Meats not so much a ham
I haven’t stopped thinking about him from earlier you were so sorry I’m like embarrassing in the pocket kid stay focused stay focused
I didn’t want to tell you I didn’t want to tell you but we have an amazing buffet and this whole party that we planned for you I just didn’t think that maybe
call Hartig I do.
Giant surprise party for you basically for this award we heard you were getting and
so I mean
motiv app
sorry
Mercy said hey go outside with me I’ll suck your dick getting fucking show up sign
anyting
when a girl when are young girls going to go tell him to suck a dick ask him to go outside so you have a joint if I can get high again Hey Arthur I got someone choice to us let’s blaze oh man you want to get high and play with me or you can sit next to me and watch me make this amazing waterfall out of lava I didn’t think about Minecraft cuz I can go outside today
show me the songs for tomorrow so sorry
that sounds mighty fine
if you come back next week and be twice as high
Every Praise Your Rod Mercy at Donna
Aaron will be here I don’t know that big either way fucking you’re on stage in your hide
respect and even coming at brother on Annie
Jenny also thank you very much for Dan Harmon
nothing got done we walked into a burger place and nothing really happened
we got somebody went into the burger place they went into the burger place
call Alicia

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