Episode: 217 – I Wanna Shave With Me


Episode: 217 – I Wanna Shave With Me


Andy Dick and Dino Stamatopoulos return for some music, slide whistle and some feels. Your Mayor uses the pressure valve on his brain and lets off some steam. Watch the video at harmontown.com/live! Become a member for $5/mo to watch the show stream live, an archive of downloads and support a small business!


everybody doing
welcome I’m Angie dick I’m your guest comptroller
welcome to harmontown
harmontown is now in session
please please let’s welcome our mayor Dan Harmon
thank you thank you Andy Dick just come to her in today thank you
but not no not really cuz Jeff is here
yeah so late that Jeff was like start without me and I was like well and he do it and then he was like I’ll do it and then Jeff was like I’m a block away and Andy was like too late
the bathroom and we’re starting the show and and thank you very much I think you’d make a great time trailer thank you any time me time
do you have the job entails that keeping me on topic for a chat. Are you get up here I need a little notepad then if I’m going to keep me on track
well maybe just maybe your joy will keep make you remember what I’m what I’m not as long as you lay it
so for instance do you know about October birthdays Andy know I don’t know well I found out that I talk about this if your birthday is in our early October like you have one of the more popular birthdays it’s not spread out like that it’s not like One 360 5th of every one liked has each birthday like there’s very popular birthdays at October 5th is the ultimate it is the most popular birthday and the reason why they think that is because 274 days earlier is New Year’s Eve interesting pretty fun so then you go like okay so what is the wee wee wee wee wee lament like who we are and we and we make all these plans for like turning over a new leaf and then we do this shit that’s fucked up our whole life
that night that very night like we do some of the craziest shit like I’m sure there’s a bunch of the GI numbers are through the roof that night right that’s an easy gas like I probably not wrong about that probably like a lot of like a lot of wives get ruined on New Year’s Eve while people are like
yeah it is you’re going to be pregnant or dead but
also who’s who’s this person going to be Picasso and we made all the good people were fuck you just you’re just making another Omen plus we got we got enough Damien’s
what’s the least popular birthday it’s May 22nd and then you go 270 4 days for back and that that’s August 22nd so is it just too hot to fuck that was Cody’s those Cody’s Theory just too hot holiday of course it’s the opposite of a holiday
and a fan blowing on you and you feel like you’re in a shity like like urban cowboy movie like you’re going to
a shit
I’m doing this rock is Jeff texted me tell Andy to bring Spencer out hashtag cops rolled
but then I brought them out I should have told you to bring about do you want try bringing him out here that you don’t have to you can study go back
just pretend to go back to stay there
how would you have brought him out the way I’m told
so you you you would say you would have me say and now what was his title game master and now give it up for game Master Spencer
right now
thank you thank you
what’s up what are you doing over there I mean you look like you’re fact-checking
are you still awake you’re right having a birthday October where you really looking at that for you weren’t looking up are you periscoping I’m trying to get got me to be trying to Periscope Marshallese is that it’s like it’s like one of those it’s like an airplane flying up next to another airplane in like siphoning gas out of it
like one of those refueling planes but it’s not under fueling your question is not really there’s no you can Periscope I asked him earlier okay what are we got here Stephen Colbert going like this
let me just talk about this for a second if I might so King Ralph huh what a movie
all right well I’ll talk about that later
all right and I
and I had a I had a I had I tried to watch The Conjuring with the with Cody you don’t have to play tomorrow I mean
I tried to watch The Conjuring with Cody and she had taken a bunch of muscle relaxers and we weren’t really getting a lot of sleep and the dogs are Barking Lot at raccoons in the backyard and and and what happened was like it just like we watch The Conjuring and it was it was scary and we were asleep but we couldn’t sleep all night and it was all his shit happening and then she was like I said something and we’re both drunk but then the middle of night she got up to go to the bathroom and then she cuz she couldn’t see she she like she was just watch play holding her hands out like being careful or which would lose my Cal ghost walk
and then and then I woke up and she saw me so you’re at you but I’m not going to stop
which is a really funny thing to have to say to somebody and it’s even funnier to be right that that’s the thing to say like she knew I thought she was I guess that’s what that you know that’s what must be happening to ghosts like they’re probably dying and I’m walking around the land of the living is like being on Vicodin at 3 in the morning like they’re all probably just going like this because they like what the fuck is going on and then we’re like oh that’s that’s like a scared gesture and they’re like no I’m I can’t see without my ghost glasses
and they’re saying I am a ghost
a water in Rogers
but it comes out
we’re ghosts do you know who Amanda knox’s I just watched it the whole thing got like no one to done any DNA test you whenever the guys like like
started to question our our process forensically it made me very upset in the year 1308 this country was the birthplace of the American or the Western justice system or something like that in America they were drawing a buffalo on the walls of caves that was
I love the idea that we
if Americans
she’s mad he might think that we were like this mad idea that he doesn’t understand if you don’t want to go to the older Country for the forensics like are you kidding me we invented eyeglasses of course we know whose blood splatter that was do you need lasers for that
you silly silly feudal man it’s weird to think that that he really thinks that way about I don’t like we really adapted that that concept that out with the old in with the new shoe such an extreme that we suffer for it to this day we have no we have no foundational culture but at the same time we don’t have a class system that’s so entrenched that you avoid a lot of people but but but it’s like in very very European ways classes like something totally like Ike still like I think it’s baked into the system and over here it’s like I just I was always look at it like America is the Las Vegas of the planet so it’s like a ton of bad shitt happening all on the sidewalk everyone next shaking their head like no culture just blinking neon just everyone trying to out go shoot everybody because fuck you I won you lost oh I’m up today I’m down tomorrow and every
metaphor that would apply and then everyone else is like this can’t last about to blow up and just waiting very patiently and for them to 400 years you’ll still be a flash in the pan if you’re gone I don’t like we’re we’re we’re on that schedule there going to be right there going to be like remember when the Americans were
I could be right hate about Amanda Knox what it what did you think of her boyfriend I don’t remember his Sera Sera Sera. Did you guys see that a little documentary
I love documentaries this about this it was in the news I watched it in the news about this girl named Amanda Knox who was accused of killing her roommate while she was doing a study abroad something I’m in Italy and they said she killed her roommate I got nobody knows about it it’s on Netflix some of you did
it’s a one-time it’s a documentary I loved it because it’s one of those one they do so well with those where I’m like I’ve got that bitch is guilty
they make her seem so crazy in the beginning and it within the first two minutes she’s making sure she says she has but she has the first word and she says look the thing is I’m Different I act weird I talk weird I react to things are at end of that that had me in because I’ve always been terrified of my 911 calls going to be the one where they play and they go listen to him why is he what do you mean my girlfriend’s head came off
you say decapitated and I’m going to be like what the fuc
I know they’re going to be
and I just like I know other going to open up one of many boxes in my house that will make me look like
like whether I killed someone or not jails not a bad place for me today
I did not know that idea I hope nothing bad ever happened just break into my house open open any third box if you really are an enemy of mine if you want to see me go to have
that’s that’s fine you know I don’t know I didn’t lose a billion dollars and then write it off for 22 years but then the next one is like
and how old is it
in both senses of the word
here are the two weird things to me about that movie Amanda Knox in about her is it in the beginning when they think really kind of make her look a little crazy Scott why isn’t she very strange phrase something about look either Ina set her up real nice little nice on a stool and we will she’s not in jail that’s my first thing is she in jail outfit right now, so I know she did not go to jail but she didn’t have to watch it so and she says either I am a crazy sociopathic psycho killer or I am you oh my God
what does that mean because I am secretly a crazy psychopath. That’s what she’s guilty she’s guilty and then her boyfriend
just turned on her right away this is all spoiler alerts. Also familiar with here in the States because we have the world’s largest prison population and all of our TV shows are about the process of putting them in prison and we are fascinated with it and so most people in this audience I think could could probably get through an interrogation but but a lot of the stories like the Memphis South Memphis 17 or whatever the hell they’re like the make of the making of a murderer thing to a lot of those stories have people who are either either they’re young or there may be a little a little on the on the lighter side of the of the intelligence guy what is how old would you say this diplomatically what path of my going to take to that minefield
or they’re sure they just haven’t they’ve never ever consider the concept of like just think of this is what the cops want they’re like I feel like I’m not saying we’re all super strong people that could get through to your gation of just saying we would know when they sat us down in the chair is that we we have to wait if we don’t call her lawyer we’re absolutely fucked until the moment we do and that and that every moment until then they’re only they’re going to do whatever they can to make us say that we did something and disguises some Italian guy was like really kind of just adorable e hunky and like an entity and it just makes you sad that is a lie he goes into one side of that black box he comes out the other like just going yeah she did it and fine now can I go to bed and then and then there’s also like he said right away when when when the cops scared him into thinking that maybe sheet that she turned onto a thumb and then because it but he had these weird thoughts about everything because when she got
that that morning to to her apartment where the girl was already dead she took a shower and I were there and there was a there was someone else’s shit in the toilet that they watch it if you’re like me you’ll be like there will y’all walk away like no one ever tempted to turn it was like this Grody that was the thing is like no woman made that turd and like I don’t know sex is like oh they’re so dainty and I’m just saying like they’re fucking like they have some standards like that is like that was a gross like fake turd like that landed outside the water the Water Burger you’d be like VP like in the bowl I’m not leaving this this is not going to be my legacy as the person that killed this person I want a quart and a night and some fingerprints maybe a little DNA but not this fucking shit out of photo of the shed date from a bad Mediterranean
mating was at the very end he he wanted to get back together with her he loved her in prison yeah she had a change of heart is like no I don’t I would think that he would leave her forever and ever but did you a household name I mean he was he was more of a guilty pleasure shity hot tub room names with for that but he like like like like you Billy bush like is in that documentary did you notice like you can hear his voice and say unless I’m totally mistaken in thinking of the other guys world is it foxy knoxy and she’s like sitting down in the gallery or the whatever they call it behind her fill table
maybe she needs a little more mascara maybe they don’t provide them Parish jails or something it was his voice not him by the way and I’m the jury’s out with him I know for a fact I remember that guy and they showed him and it wasn’t unless it was but I remember the guy I can picture him and but but Billy is weird because I happened to be following him on Snapchat
Billy Billy Bush I only follow 5 people
you only follow 5 people like you only follow five star kids and Billy fucking bed
and I text it was Keith for this whole Trump thing is because I’m bats and weirdly fascinated by him because I’ve been interviewed by it many times if I if I show up I think that if I remember he always advised to do my interview I’m going to I’m doing it
is he trying to get me you know what I mean Corner me like a rat poked my cage what is he doing and so I’ve been I’ve been watching him like privately because the Snaps are private supposedly and and I and I’ve been trying to like a sassy to see if he’s a real person if he’s being if if there’s a guy if there’s actually a guy in the movie out there that actually likes me that’s all so I’ve been watching watching watching and laughing and then it sucks that because because
no but the sad thing is it
you didn’t have yellow on there that I know this one’s the one and pretending to like me well yeah because the cost of celebrity can you whether it in this rough industry Town what if you were a passionate haunted house curator we’ve we’ve had my neighbor on before you guys know best boots and she was here too but she’s not coming up tonight so now boo boo
why. I didn’t mean boo like please Boo for me I understand you didn’t understand that but I also when did you guys start doing things to make me happy you fucking Millennial same faces I thought you came here to watch me fail so now all this what you’re going to do one command you will not cease
but Beth has been up here in the most recently she was up here with her kid Timber who is a really a dyed-in-the-wool card-carrying for years and for 4 years for a 16 year old that’s a lot that’s like that’s like Beyond dog years that’s like a long time that he’s been doing is haunted house and so we said I said let’s keep tabs on him so he’s he’s he’s here tonight with the with some of his haunted house workers let’s bring out a tumor and Company
oh things kids
cuz I did I want you to think we were going to call him but I wanted you to come to the show you’re terrifying friends I don’t know who okay well I guess stranger things kids yeah that’s that’s all right well I don’t think we’ll forget those names anytime soon
do they have Specialties like this it is anyone in charge of the of the pumpkin bucket net by the door and then another person’s in charge of taping the plastic bags to the to the CD player
they all do that job okay I’ll do that your mom sent some photos will fresh. How is the
that’s not that’s not the reaction that I mean that was my joke but you wouldn’t you react like that you make it bad to laugh you shouldn’t you shouldn’t you shouldn’t be turned into Married with Children for a second and I’ll look at it was a show in the 90s and people going through every time you said he didn’t want to fuck his wife and it was like it was messed up can I can I call you Tim or should you have been named Tim
sorry I’m sorry
yeah I probably should be easier for people like you to pronounce yeah I mean it’s all about me and my comfort how is the how is the how is it going this year compared to last year’s much better because we have more actors and we have it’s it’s bigger in what ways over the over the four years since you started getting into a haunted house cuz I know I know one answer is going to be you start earlier in earlier in the year right cuz this new you started in May working on this year’s not ask it what otherwise is it getting bigger like geographically like is it taking up more space yeah last year it still took up space but this year has more twists and turns and your mom said
it’s just more of an efficient use of land that’s all this breakthrough of Landscape Management
what what how did you figure out how to use it better than last time so the real question
I don’t know I just use my brain so this time around you’re just like a hot man I’m better yeah I’ve grown a lot since last year oh I give us four years ago it’s just robots now it’s getting to be robots out don’t get me started on what you two get started so that’s it that’s the frustration of this age isn’t it you’re not allowed to get started and yet you started as I saw him told my parents that but but but but you the pictures that that that I got sent there it looks like a lot of like like like I’m watching it under construction I guess of these pictures but it really looks like a there’s a post-apocalyptic theme hence the gas masks G is there a reason you chose a post-apocalyptic theme have you guys been watching the Des
face lately
Aspen art show
is it looks like a lot of like like like black plastic bags and black and that’s like is that like just a framework or is it like are you walking through a world of black plastic so yeah pretty much it’s the frame and then those are the walls and I’ll leave Footprints in it
that’s nice yeah I mean I can’t what it what am I going to do with that
I’m too old to live too young to help like I don’t understand
how long is the average consumer’s experience when they come to your haunted house like from from gate-to-gate from running away in Terror to running up and going I think about 3 to 5 minutes depending on how scared you are what is a mistake people make who don’t want to be scared in haunted house or do they go slower or faster they probably go slower cuz so they get scared more yeah they drag out that create their own nightmare pretty much it’s just like when you’re a monkey and you grab the sugar or the salt cubes in that one 70s nature film and they they won’t let go of the salt so they’re trapped there forever and they die of thirst score
or it’s like like like I don’t know like other things in nature were that your struggle cooks and I think they caught it makes your Jeep leaving
I mean I’ve never been asked that question before but I’ve seen in movies yeah I’ve never seen like a nature documentary where Anthony Hopkins is like the elephant doesn’t count it’s in quicksand things in life it’s probably real real calling you I fact-checked it in my world because I was stuck up to my ballsack in quicksand when I was a little quick Santa’s real is it a real site trying to listen to my parents one telling me Santa’s rules once telling me no it’s not Santa’s real Santa’s real Santa’s not real but quicksand think about it is there anything other than fear that you would love to cause with your haunted
equality can you elaborate just say that people are you hoping that maybe people will walk out going like man that scared the shit out of me and also like did you notice that is not as much a part of our life is it needs to be
well I guess that’s why Halloween’s once a year so I can show you all the hell you can go through in life and then you can be lucky for the rest of the year the season well let’s have a Hannaford summer and his friends and go to their haunted house
do you want people to go right like yeah I mean cuz I saw on that I think of the Facebook like you know one of our fans Jane who was coordinating some I don’t know there was I heard about the bunch of people coming to your house and house I don’t know if they’ve done it yet if they’re going to do it oh yeah you have a big fan base we had about two or three people that I’ve not that that seems about right so so we can we can we can invite people without without worrying of overwhelming you it’s 4302 Ambrose Avenue where any other websites better to give it’s Ambrose haunted maze. Com
yeah every night from 7
and it says face your fears face your fears all right all right you guys go face your fears of the school day tomorrow
hey do you miss traveling with your besties like a girls trip do you miss go in a huge family gathering if I can smell food do you miss meeting the parents so I can get out well actually, but you can still do all of these things with me Desmond Thorne on my podcast adventures and black Cinema each week I take you on a journey through a new black film how it relates to the culture and sometimes all the themes were late to my own life so there’s always a little tea and a slight bit of embarrassment and of course as a filmmaker myself and one of the blackest Phil nerdiest film nerves like you’re always in good hands
adventures in Blacksburg, but Desmond Thorne executive-produced by Amanda seales new episodes every Tuesday on all major podcast platforms
all right well Andy the time has come for you to I think abandon your your wings as guess comptroller and become a gas
our next guest has been guest controlling and mixed results and I’m going to sit out here
okay let’s mix it up because Andy and you’re doing such a good job of controlling am I am I being a periscope right now there was so cool that you had
you think that they that they murdered Zane that why is that why you saying you’re outside
I tightened by One Direction who Twitter backwards it says Zane is dead
but you have to reverse the file in SoundCloud in order to hear it
North End ago and I ended just and it is just evaporated milk to come in and
oh no
hi I’m filling in for Andy
Dino stamatopoulos
are you going to
well he’s going to fuck me I forgot I forgot to mention something about the haunted house that Beth mentioned which is that there are so many more twists and turns this year the people are really getting lost
how old are how old were those boys and why was Andy here with them
also when they left and he left right after they die
I mean
haha we’re just me now
where is what it what did you do or say to those children back there I didn’t see them I went pee okay
all right so I know that this is been talked about a lot but by everybody but it’s that’s part of why I’m outraged about it cuz it hasn’t changed like what what why did we make this shift with fortune cookies where they’re just advice cookies they’re just they just make a third compliments like you are a wise person looks like okra. What does it make
people are going to like you at a party great Fortune one person might not like you at a store where you’re going to get invited to a party I don’t know if you should go like peep somebody bite their might not like you I knew my life would be a fortune cookie open up in the first one you said
so they feel like they be all right
what was that one it’s okay so I was describing it to Cody cuz we were talking about Trump and who they can’t I was like how people think it’s like a king Ralph thing is that why they like I’m she’s like what’s King Ralph I said there was a movie did that John Goodman is a guy in the leg lives in Vegas or Cleveland or something in heat or Cleveland
interchangeable severe the entire the entire royal family is wiped out in a freak accident leaving him as the only Heir so he’s King Ralph and then she’s like wait that sounds like the greatest movie ever my cat does why haven’t I ever watch that and then we watched it it was like oh my God it was so boring
entire Royal Family getting murdered in the first three minutes and like having John Goodman become the king of England isn’t.
he becomes the king the designated Survivor
yeah they put the other like the guy that you like the secretary of agriculture and then he becomes president if the president doesn’t really do anything it doesn’t like and that’s not a controversial statements like specifically designed to not be a active office and then so then you’re like what’s at stake but then also it’s just weird because I think I think the only thing the Royals are a family that’s the whole point of them so you it since you have to kill them all in order to have a BB King he’s just wandering around the Buckingham Palace going this needs a bowling alley and like as not like there’s an old lady

is she dead there’s just a bunch of people going well your king morality to catch the shake things up for for good or what happens it kind of but it’s like so low stakes it’s like Blake he becomes king and then he falls in love with a stripper and like but she’s not a stripper because that’s really fucked up like that she is like and then it’s like they go straight from I can’t believe this guy’s the king of England to if he does something improper and then the the Stuarts are the tutors will be able to sweep in and what do you mean if he does something improper he’s a fucking fat guy from Las Vegas like what would then you’ll be able to invoke the law of abdication it doesn’t make it
listen to spend the whole time going to what the hell’s going on if you’re talking about a movie that you don’t want any of us to say yeah
that do the platform King Ralph exist in the annals of our bad movie too and it’s like be interesting to watch a guy be king of England but it’s it’s really boring like I’m not a bad idea of you seeing to see like King Spencer Spencer
designated Spencer people are really getting lost in that in that haunted house okay.
Go like click click click as you come in with all those clickers when they checked the till at the end there’s two people is in quiet
and we ended and we and they run a thing that the Plastics all intact so they think there’s two people still in there facing their fears
Define that weird at the end of the the haunted house does the snacks that taste like people
it tastes like two people
play I don’t I don’t even know they changed my stupid phone it’s like two missing people
what was supposed to bring out Dino so that you could go to that we can talk to him
he knows what he likes
any have you been man where you going like every time I look over your Milling about how I thought I was coming up there but I was watching would you be happier out here and be with you in a little bit but I feel comfortable with Tina but I have to say
I wish I was sitting over there watching you and it was like I was watching Mike my kid being like a you know the soccer team for the first time
when you got your first I was so proud of you
what was a really nice person. I don’t know his mom took the picture
all right well so you guys again just to re mention it you have a feral audio podcast called skull juice
what roads love has a band called sorry about everything okay I’m not really apologizing I’m talking about it easier than comedy look I’m not getting any laughs
and you know I want to be like you so I just I don’t know if I told you yeah but I started band called you’re welcome
weather when I got my first time before the Ben Stiller show
sure well I mean I don’t know I’m not dead yet
thank you baby I’ll let Alice go with her
I messed up my mom my first my mother if you want her to be dead she’s a pessimist means I don’t want it I don’t know I don’t know
your mom’s not going to listen to will never listen to this will make sure if he wants to fuck you really badly
Robin Harris
who doesn’t want to talk to you why don’t you want to meet a fuck you you have like you didn’t spend years that I don’t want to talk about it just like a jerk
did you guys ever have a dream where you were a lady
and you were and you are getting a copy elated with upon by a gentleman I did
I have two in my kitchen sink when I was a kid as a lady very Mario from Mario Brothers looking guy like just giving it to me missionary style and I was like in the sink will you shrunken down to fit inside of think I wish I was a little younger kids so in my mind like everything was the sink was bigger or you know and then also if I’m thinking I’m a lady I don’t know I knew I was in the sink
I think it’s a big big enough for a for a but a human but contained in the sink like like like I was like like the little sliding down a spoon and what is it if your bus in the sink how does somebody fuck you on your bed is down and I know I mean
he was like
get on the ground you know I mean that’s something cuz he was a he was a compact man yeah probably like
oh the way that he was giving it to me on the height of counter that I was on with a pillow
I just think it’s a point of view I mean I don’t have to deal with that stuff so it and I was like probably I don’t know what I would have to say it like this is after puberty and I’m like 13 maybe I had that dream you probably would look like a nice lady at that age my friends when I was like 12 somehow came up and they like do you know you’d make a good looking girl and I was like mad but now I’d kill for that a compliment
when I was 13 I would love to have heard that your mom wanted to fuck me
do you want it
sure I mentioned it before and how might I maybe not I had a dream one time and I think I told you about this damn where I was going down on a girl in my dream and then at some point she had a dick but it was my dick
but I have a second my own dick in the whole time I feel like I want to do a good job but I don’t want to come in my mouth
I mean that you’ve never
have you ever have you ever had dreams where you suck your own cock I always do it’s like it’s like flying dreams in that
no what do you mean in your dream you’ve been talking and it’s great really
let’s just bring the kids back out on a date
One Direction
I mean I mean I couldn’t even dream of doing a sit-up when that’s like eleven thousand sit-ups while I can fly like I’ll realize wait I can fly and then I’ll just like start flying very very positive like emotional or psychological state to be in with the flying dream is like is like the most you can control that was lucid dreaming liberated espiritual
I’m sure it’s great that’s all I got to say
I am a double major in literature and film because of Dino so because of me yes I don’t even know what literature is never right in my life
that is super fine literally I used moral Orel to 2
find out I went to a business school so you couldn’t you can do without measuring anything that wasn’t both business and something else and so I wanted to do a media and and literature major and moral Orel was the reason that I was the first person who was able to do that
a boy don’t don’t Ballroom your moral Orel fan if you got a lot of pressure now
what’s your name
how I think I look so very nice that’s my star Burns name
you have a double made thank you thank you
he raised his hand to think about a double major with one of your Heroes but unless it’s me or have you ever dreamed about sucking your own dick have you ever dream about sucking my dick yes you have having a flying dream about sucking my own deck that turned on and you double over to suck your dick and you become a just a rock Sonic the Hedgehog
periscoping because you always make fun of me and you say your Facebook living switched over to Facebook live right sir
super nice guy
Facebook login Facebook login I could get it would be the best job in the world and what if you do exactly it’s like giving someone else a handjob is brushing someone else’s teeth
you’re just holding the fucking phone which is that we can touch ourselves of their hands and and that’s precisely why it’s actually a lot more interesting when someone else touches this interesting but not as good know how to do it before work
but but that kind of stuff is so good at it on a Saturday after I guess maybe you’re a clumsy clumsy feeling around and like like like like like I don’t care thinking this is great but I wish they’d I wish to get out of here difference between me and you so I can so I could just be physically that it’s like oh my God I’d rather rather be alone right now but but but but usually even if even a person you’re not terribly fond of or or is it isn’t even that great at it like it’s still better than than another negative
craft brakes Louie Louie wants told me he woke up from he woke up from like asleep in his hand was asleep and he hadn’t been with a girl for a long time so you just put it on his dick during to make it feel like someone different the dirty sanchez The Strangers is it make your hand I said The Viper Room in 60 developing Poise and I don’t know how this came up but he’s like this is what I’m saying like a playground chance is a normal thing on what it what is this thing that people actually do I never hear anything
he was trying to make you laugh because he was insecure that he was hanging out with a comic he was trying to be funny
I’m going to bring one of the show we’re going to get to the bottom of this not bring three friends and gas masks
oh but we got to the bottom of it and then can they just be less like fucking fucking shit to take care of
this isn’t this is when I have no right to the nighttime had a really good week like I’ve been having a really good couple weeks to text about Andy getting here because I put him to bed
I woke up in a bad mood
week week we can read this. Do you want to read that conversation I might be kind of funny family fun weekend we had a great like Starbucks Halloween party we hung out like it’s just been it’s been good in general has been very happy dreaming of flying and and having a great time hanging out with Cody and stuff in the weekends especially like a guilt-free hang out timing and now it’s tomorrow is Monday and I just woke up in a bad mood and so they go tomorrow is Monday I got to the show tonight let me know you know and I’m going to get out of that and I’m going to be tired in the slogan at work to do and I got to get up in the morning and I hate that you live for the weekend you used not to be like that do you look to doing a lot to look forward to doing this show this girl here it’s fine but but it isn’t it safe enjoy doing the show but but but when and I I don’t want to have deadlines anymore what do you do on Monday I don’t really know what’s up in
life these days well I don’t have it that’s part of their you ever heard of the reason I’m in a bad mood is because it shifted I can’t even I can’t even vent about you know what are you doing a new show right now it’s shit I can’t even go into detail about it because it’s either or it’s pissing somebody off or all the shit and I just want out of that situation where I can just be myself and be like like like I can just go good day bad day bad day here’s why good date here’s why but I can’t fucking like just I’m not bitching about it I certainly am enjoy the star Burns Halloween party formed that’s part of why I’m so cranky this morning because it was a long weekend and I hope you are literally dressed as who had a day off yet
yes all right so and then today this shit starts
all right so I started it is it is it is it when named Steve Stephen Dina okay good good
if Andy text you guys about when the show starts tomorrow tell him 7 okay okay I’m okay with that
like I see you you want me to do that right so then Steve Levy text I’m slightly retarded and then then text back cuz I’m learning to use stickers and feel the burn and like it’s just a feel the burn sticker cuz it’s the first one to learn to use and then someone put a Mario hat sticker over that and then I put a pumpkin over that and then someone put a Mario mustache and I know is over that
anyway there’s a lot of The Seekers after that and then today I wrote with an! Remember 7 cuz this is after I texted Andy and I said I already 7 I texted and Ken Bone and Steve leaves that got it and then today at 3:21 p.m. do you know said can I sing a song tonight so I can plug her band show on November 4th I didn’t write November 4th but I’m adding that Japan here and I texted do yep because I texted you but it auto corrected it to do for some reason to run out there and then you put a sticker over that of a horse with a mohawk playing guitar that’s animated and I said thanks and who’s drinking at the drawing-room now and I texted a Henry Henry Winkler as the Fonz giving a thumbs up
because I because I had texted do and then yep and then I typed yep into the sticker thing and came up with stickers when you get you get when you’re saying yep finds going like that so far things are pretty white why not it’s going to be a very strange turn it’s about you it’s about it’s about you should I leave now. Don’t leave now but don’t bite but if you stayed don’t don’t interrupt it
Sharon Tarantino says I say Dustin or Steve is it better to bring an acoustic or can I plug in an electric. And then adding a?
We texted acoustic is better or than you think it okay if I had to guess and then Dustin who’s in the conversation the whole time says acoustic acoustic what is the sticker witchery why have I fallen off as a millennial and I texted a grumpy old man in a in a ball pit
can a ball pits that are grumpy old person
and I wrote that I said that you and I rode haha! I don’t do LOL stickers going to be going out there and clean dancing around it with a wizard cap and then I put stealing his head and then he says no and he just asked me what time the show is do I really say 7 I don’t like lying
okay so act to write yes three exclamation points he will probably still be 30 late you said okay and I say because I love my Levy I say but why not tell the truth and let him either become a better person or go fuck himself
Anna Anna Anna Anna Anna and then I realize I’m using the wrong language and I say or forget even better person it’s like he’s late he misses the show who cares you know yeah it’s a bad habit not a bad person Steve Levy says I’ll split the difference and tell him we get to the Green Room at 7:30 I said that seems truth enough Dino says he wants to go ahead he wants to be lied to he told me
quickest route to write Dustin says he knows his Wrangler and I said fine leave us out of it yeah and I with that tone of voice to send Dustin says I’ll text him and I said my Lee Vino Lykke Li
make a note I left my son
the lady says I already told him we all meet in the Green Room at 7:30 Dustin says that everyone in this thread is a bad person besides Levi and I wrote I told him 7
when I knew he’d ask you to and then Dustin send a gif of of The Lion King cub starting out the happy butt and then and then and then is that a middle finger to leave you’re just a number one I don’t know I’m too old if he likes it just like it’s not abuse if I like it
Jesus you pussies the emoticon the Emoji that’s
yeah the scaredy was closed teeth guy that’s what I use when people tell me stuff where I’m supposed to give a smiley but I’ve used it to stimulate like my like autistic Tendencies like I just like to see you want me to tell you when I’m fishing what you’re fishing for all this while I’m driving so I’m not really reading everything correctly so I believe he says I didn’t lie and I say I just go by high maintenance and low maintenance so one I don’t expect you guys to ever let us complicate such a simple matter for you ever again and to Andy can’t be on the show anymore even the guy in the wheelchair just says I’m in a wheelchair he and has a guy that helps him we don’t have to pretend he has legs and shit
I have I haven’t I haven’t even done anything wrong
you did a whole life’s work of things for me and you also the only podcasters never been late to cancel the show he says a bunch of stuff that’s nice about me and then he said thank you for the only thing I did is what time and then they said beat we all meet at 7:30 in the greenroom you get here till 7:30 and I was late there is that one else’s head
Sonic Ariana Grande
so do you know who tries the last word it and says I will say this I will say this a guy in a wheelchair appreciate the ramp and Andy appreciates being tricked into being on time thank you maybe I should have said that from the beginning and I said you were saying it the whole time you didn’t fail to make it clear ignore his Andy ever failed to make it clear that Angie needs everyone around her to become either dishonest or insane
and then you say you forget it we don’t need all that stuff right and I’m the only person in the story is Andy Dick
who is an argument about accessibility thank you thanks for having my back the whole time here at 7:30 and I was here after work I just got a plan and I drove straight to the drawing and was you guys said that you were both are there Dino show me these texts I said it sounds like Dan might be in a kind of a grumpy mood today I got a bet that didn’t sound like the good mood and that you’ve been in the like for the last little while so I was right about that whatever that was just because you have the the the Sunday night Blues cuz you get to school night everybody mad at me and I apologize I was yelling at Dino for like telling us how to treat you that is weird
we’re like an old married couple wear like really you’re so protective and sweet I don’t think America but I think you’re like my child and mother at the same time
and most of it should start on Twitter with strangers because I’m like in the middle of something with fucking strangers cuz I thought making people happy with trying to give us a different angle and it was only one person that’s just like some guy like like tweeted responded with like like oh yeah it’s a really interesting except you forgot to mention they’re all racist
so read it again you never fucking read it and then he’s like your fucking piece of shit like how can you use the word racist the way racist use the word race like you’re fucking like being like what would it be if it was an article about how the reason why the country is like going into the shiter is because we long ago like we talking like week week week we just constructed this way there’s all these real people perceive all the people in all of the cities is being like out of our fucking mind with no idea how reality works and vice-versa it was just this article written from a typical Midwestern who became a comedy writer whose like look I would be one of those people if I hadn’t successfully fled to one of The Hunger Games metropolises where I started dressing funny and understanding that edamame tastes good I’m putting words in his mouth
sites was just kind of like breaking down our mythology as a nation and how that is why it comes to this that is why when we scratch our heads and go like oh shit we got a but yeah this is how a bunch of like like fucking Factory working white people all of a sudden see themselves as underdogs and is not all of a sudden it and is it is just like yeah but you forgot their basest I’m like that’s going to solve everything that’s fucking great so they were born racist than there is there a fucking vapor in the like like that’s as dumb as an exciting with the split is anything else it’s never going to solve anything I just like hate that shitt you know that I didn’t read the fucking article all he’s doing is expressing a fucking need to vent. So he could have no I’m not going to be a sycophant just say oh that’s a great article and I’m not going to read it that’s for sure I’m going to scan scan the headline and then I’m going fucking bar that shit up cuz I want to be smart today cuz I don’t want to be smart fucking grow up you dick I got shit to do
I was just didn’t say anything or didn’t read it or did you notice a fucking do shit fucking respond you don’t have to respond stop responding you don’t have to respond nothing when you’re making a web API that’s why they provided for you they don’t actually think you have anything of value to say and you don’t know a lot you don’t just say you’re happy or sad future I statements
I’m glad happy scared jealous I hope I fear no one can argue with your feelings
if you feel it and express it put the new station 45% of the police and you never said if you’re not Nova you’re just lazy ass or not racist you’re just a fucking dick head Jim stop knowing you should have just feel something to say I’m scared she’s scared are you make a good point remind me never never
just remind me never to ask you for any favor ever
isn’t that chick trip your bad mood or you already in a bad mood for that that that triggered you to get into the state so I feel like a bad person like so I wake up hating myself I wake up going to fuck I fucked up again I got shit to do you need more blows Aqua I I just have this ability to not engage in people that might upset me like that I just don’t I just really like the king of this I just don’t engage I think is it possible that you know as a tactic to put things off and not do whatever it is you know secret thing is you’re going to be doing tomorrow do you
do you and Jay no matter how did you know that that is a thing I used to suck my cock and he’s like sorry Dan that can you just sign a few things and you were you were sitting back and forth and playing a video game and he’s like you mind signing a few of these and you said well I’m not going to lean over
what do you put a put them right there made out of moving like under to read rap lyrics allowed on CNN you’re leaving out my self-awareness to hear that and we talked about it but it was funny you like to know later I’m like it was supposed to be going to lean forward I have a political stance about if there’s a whole part of it was that I was letting him know cuz he was saying is this a bad time
and I was like well I’m not going to say it’s a bad time because I’m playing a video game right now but I will be just honest and say I don’t want to fucking like honestly I’m like being a big fat pig right now but I can’t say that I’m fighting inner-city crime so it’s not a bad time I’m not feeding the hungry I just am so fat and so sad and tired like tears of fears what’s going to happen in here so it’s not going to happen I was like Scott Rudin like throwing an ashtray and going like I’m so tired you could learn a few things from this miss her everything’s great it is
you know my favorite all that car work of leaning over and suck on my own dick
the price I pay I’m actually parked so even in my dreams I never get to suck my dick
start to a simple actions are like Van Cleef suck your own dick
I don’t know what else I can do for me
I like a typical Midwestern rise and take that information and I go and probably if you sucked it too much it stopped being meeting anything like that’s like that got kind of the Wisconsin like why I’m not living in California argue yeah wow I never went through the ocean go out to a place with her I can’t feel my fingers cuz I’m deliriously happy
you got to you got to know what can we do and maybe the answer is nothing because you have to cheer me up here if you got this burden if I have to go pick up my dry cleaning in the morning I have a bad night studio all the shit that you’re thinking of like wood running the studios. It’s the shit that’s up to actually me like like it’s my old life where I’m like oh I’m supposed to be a Jedi here’s where I pick up a lightsaber and do that thing I’m supposed to be good at not like my therapist said so in other words like the old Dan like
that guy doesn’t work anymore like you can’t just say I’ll take that and I’ll be back and I don’t I’m going to write it and it’s like that guy was like dying like season 6 of community that’s why it’s like the season was much better than 5:00 or 3 or anything like that and yet I was still like like setting records sleeping on my couch because it was like is empty of like a tortured genius and all the stuff like and the guy who’s like delegating to people like intend and collaborating with people during normal working hours and then spending his time at home in bed being happy watching Netflix like that guy that guy’s fine and doing well and has a bunch of things to do but that guy works at all to do a schedule but then the fucking dumb ass hole that was like all breed this one it is
just going on right now give a lot of stuff for me any one of those things would be enough to make me have bad sleep I’m a lazy guy because like literally if I have to I have to just getting a plane tomorrow and go do improvisation somewhere where I don’t have to carry any gear or do any rehearsal or know anything and it can be half-drunk I’m still I still have anxiety dreams about missing the plane I actually haven’t excited when I wake up and I’m like I have to get the dryer at 12. Are you serious like I’m like I got to get there by 12 miss you you think or what I just need I love I love being there but why do you feel like you have to be I got there at 6 and Suites
The Sweet Spot time I really like it’s about them although I do feel like they like me
but the old days of the of the old alcoholic that you should go in there they’re kind of like some of them drop dead some of them I have left town yeah I remember going to the funeral of the first one to drop dead who is it was Heavy because I was like okay we got we talked a lot and I had some funny stories and I thought you won’t even remember he was at The Rustic I felt like about my age back then yeah and he would always come in and drink a glass of wine and and tell funny stories and and I and I remember having a lot of funny stories about him and I thought I’ll go there and tell his family you know and I go to the funeral and everyone’s you know crying and do you know his body is there and you know and then I hear oh yeah he’s he just drank too much and all my stories are from the The Rustic Inn the bar so I was I felt like I’d have to walk up and say
yeah it was his drinking buddy right you know the guy I helped kill him
right so I just kind of like just backed up and walked out of the church and went home I didn’t meet anyone
but do you stop people from the bars funerals have have you not even gone to but just know never happened like how many oh LOL yeah I guess at this point like 10:12 yeah I need the first one though we’d have 12 Friday laundromat funeral is at 10:43 but I think I’ve been going to the drawing-room like a rustic like near when I was on a fake ID I got that’s how long and it was a guy that I thought was going to be dead in a year or two back then and he still alive but this guy has a glass eye
and one of the bartenders was that one time when he sneeze and his glass light blue out of his head went bouncing across the bar and landed like in the well and she found it and he was like look around for it and that wasn’t like that was a good I can just head home I guess you want to Sure Fire
do you want to just talk about it. You said it was going to fuck you earlier alright that was a joke
finally she can I don’t care who I didn’t know was a little lady what’s your name
what are the best customer Trump
the only time I’ve ever seen him not wearing his headphones is when he’s doing the podcast podcast on Central I got you
or maybe Andy Covington this is happening Spencer do you play do you play a guitar or did you ever have any lessons did you ever try and he wants to hold it yeah I teach with my teeth lessons
did you eat did you ever have lessons that you ever know I didn’t need that much just the instant genius
Spencer I don’t like your attitude right now
a lot of people don’t know
Herbert Spencer I think we filled that time perfectly I hope so we’ll find out
everybody stays real safe I wish I had a stand to do this so can I run
so this is a this is a song that my band have a band we have a show on
the reason I don’t have a say on this is cuz I feel like now I can’t turn my head I’m on it

we can’t we just want if I hold the mic that and he’s holding or what yeah it was not working out
don’t get rid of the laugh
November 4th I keep saying November 4th but I don’t know where it is I owe do you know where it is
no I’ll try me any of that were you start singing I was going I have one question for Dan Harmon a perfect I’ve been wanting to ask as an awkward all night so it’s nice it’s it’s um I just the only one that feels awkward I think is me because this is such a great party and the atmosphere and he drinks and you’re drinking and you’re already everyone’s drinking and I think about all day and night but I have a question Dan Harmon maybe I’ve asked you before but if I did I don’t remember the answer will do you think that I will be able to at some point
responsibly drink again talk about this no
got my answer that’s a reminder that I don’t remember the words
I wouldn’t
no I don’t need work but let’s call me after the song Alright well then I’m going to change it I’m going to sing a song about drinking
I’m going to do it oh I never should have gone Brown I think I saw you on the way down to my smile upside down
I’m glad you said that cuz I feel so grumpy and I I thought no one’s going to want to take orders from me what do you want me to do I wanted to say don’t go there very nice they think I’m a musician though
what time does Spring Lake I don’t know what to do with that it spreads through the ironic cancer of everyone going like well if they’re clapping I should I want to write in Spanish and then it’s like everyone’s clapping and dancing I don’t want the cloud and you have to have time and you don’t fucking have time to put the goddamn tambourine.
All right is there a another microphone stand
this will be really fun day it is
don’t worry about it you just want you to not worry about it thank you Don Brown
I think I saw you on the way down
I can’t just doing physical comedy
I would like the guy in the recording booth that was like the guy that’s like
we got to get more medicine and then the front
take a guy just try to relax a bit just let me know how to make a thing eat me a sad song I’m laughing
guess what I never should have bought
and I know everyone’s thinking about black women. I just got to quit like Niger once in awhile
come turn my right side up do I regret it when I was young
what’s a good custom do watch myself lose back then I have the luxury
Define booze brown boots Brown
broom broom broom
never should have got
magicJack app
where is the best version
Talking Heads
I love that feeling so much the flight has been in a hundred years
that’s that was a very good at slide whistle solo Maybe not maybe with perfunctory at the beginning but then it was like it was right and natural that’s when it came together it was a slide whistle
be home in a way that we we broke all our own rules and the fourth quadrant a perfectly circular story in the face now where I regret my grumpiness down in shame and like going to running over the evening I think this is the best car ever
we’re in that third quadrant where you tell people not the cloud you’re telling yourself you shouldn’t have been what you’re doing and I know they’ll be some sort of release at some point right you don’t become the master of Both Worlds station how many people would get turned into the bus including apparently the differently-abled like
belges we make fun of black people should be verboten my tastes are for boat because I know you drink and you drink vodka song you you feel like maybe you should never have gone Brown story about Little Dom’s and I wasn’t joking at all during any of this I got up to leave and stumbled and fell and everyone said don’t worry I’m not walking
you weren’t trying to be like WC Fields I wish I was ready for that are both like straight up vodka drink when I feel sick I can’t drink brown liquor I wish I was but I started drinking vodka after I became friends with you that’s right it’s just a trivia fact I mean it’s not really like a weird just saying it’s pretty good we trivia it should be you should put it on the fucking billboard
Ketel One calls you up on your birthday yeah and they don’t send me any serious question I know you’ve been sober for a good long time now is it is it kind of conversations bum you out or is it now I’m just waiting patiently for the going to happen to know I’m asking damn look I mean Isaac like Gino says we talked about you like do you know and I only responsible answer we can take no I wouldn’t try it I don’t think so I think then there’s a great right now the old gray I got sick all week and I used to think I would get sick because I’d be a drinker I was a drinker but I won’t have no matter what so so why can’t I you know especially after two years you know try to drink responsibly alone
there’s just an unfortunate people in my heart bleeds for them and then die and we’re having the best time to find this is the most fun I have and I can’t drink cuz he has an alcohol allergy like he he’s barely ever go through this guy I know named cuz if I’m going to talk about him for a second he never got to have fun on booze but but he has examined
Road closed up and he almost died I didn’t know what the fuck is going on and all his friends are do you put see you pussy because he didn’t help because it wasn’t a thing it was understood because of severe
I feel like I’m a excuse is why someone shouldn’t drink and then every time Andy says against another excuse why he should we should all drink allergic to alcohol I think that he might I think that your allergic my throat does not close off your allergic allergic to being ignored everything goes I’ve seen it like you’re you’re one of those folks I’m like like you are at your you asked me if you asked me that’s my honest appraisal that you’ve only caught me at the tail-end when things are super shity there’s a greater right to call you after tailhead also
drink that your allergic to and then you become like mr. Hyde like you stop being the Auntie that we like and then you start becoming perfect so I’ll drink three I don’t know what is longitude for that reason we’re looking towards a solution that’s what I want as well and is a more constructive I think I could do that you were doing a bit that you know how funny it is and I know it’s coming or natural paint of animal you wish that you can have a drink and I really do. I used to smoke and sometimes I miss smoking and different people and some of those people can do things and people who can smoke one cigarette at a party once a month when they’ve had three cocktails and you meet other people who can have a hollow leg with drinking and other people who like you meet people who have high cholesterol no matter how much I hope Brandi and it’s just not something you have after one glass of wine or a couple of vodkas or whatever it is and then it’s just more it’s a warm drink
I would drink and I love that drawing humor from the fact he’s not even smiling that you have that meeting you I thought you would have an answer something about where I can drink again I’m waiting time to plug my band show
where is it at by the way where are you going to be our new Institute of abnormal in Culver City in Burbank. Big number is it good
cool pretty cool venue
Burbank Boulevard North Hollywood California 91601
why am I November 4th and his band is November 5th Saturday November 5th has got this great female and his dog guitar players I got the best musicians ever and I’m the worst I can’t sing and I can try the worst you’re so adorable and lyrics it’s a it’s a great show and can I are you kidding me yes Grateful Dead
podcasting Duo hell has more huge cock it Dino has a quarter inch of Chaos
do you drink and you and you and you have a hollow leg and after you stop drinking a beer while shaving
I’m just saying Dan is trying to shoehorn whenever ads until I go
it’s at razor-thin Dollar Shave Club Dollar Shave Club burden is done
no I don’t think so I can’t do any of those voices anymore
how do you spell insert hey guys
razor what you have to say
yeah baby razor the house I stayed more than a mess because they don’t have a lot of hair or a lot of surface area
antibiotics are going to change so much I got in my face and didn’t get an answer
it’s not a selling point that you can see how the alternative would be
cuz you won’t get a 100% money back
I don’t even have to check on that
any word from the Bible
yo let me see if I can do this better
pick up sleep you’re so I can take longer to rhyme words my name is poopy rapper Snapper. I am free I want to share with me
you are thinking about a ride or not
give me some acoustic guitar
Yo-Yo Yo-Yo Yo-Yo Yo-Yo straight razor or probably six or seven weeks without any hair growing but that’s not
going to dollarshaveclub.com spring
I think it’s a pretty bold stance that it’s the only online razor company that guarantees you won’t get AIDS from their product I mean ever
well that they’re still working on that okay
right now
just guarantee their products AIDS free
how many Gillette
other razor companies that test on animals
that’s why they’re in such by their slogan is the best a man can get there like you’re in God’s crosshairs when you wake up in the morning I think we’re going to make that better for you or your company if you didn’t choose we make things that cut table and the only people in the razor business that aren’t making weapons
we’re not saying Gillette gives you waves were saying they don’t care if you get it or not
but we can’t imagine getting it when they test the razor’s on animals look like they like shave a whole monkey do you like me
only I only have to shave three but I did get the pic the shaver gets a job
when at work or Dollar Shave Club
well they don’t have AIDS there with your son is his your guys’s shave company the one that I hear when I hear at the end I think I’ve heard them say do you know why we are able to provide razors so cheaply and then the answer is because we owned the factory at the same company as a whole. What a weird what a weird brag now that’s their thing is that the same one so I don’t want to say
so there is complete I guess there are like I mean July Holidays are some companies because beers or so in the center of a big executive blade in an acrylic guys get this movie is it related to the other
another satisfied customer
I know if we met in person and at the risk of alienating our relationship outside the box as a person who was there is there a copy is so like it’s not it’s not very like they don’t they don’t have a lot of information out of there that’s like that’s like the only really brings the fucking nitty-gritty like they really do just say like it’s everywhere you want what you want like like like me undies is like those like Nook look here’s the deal and explain laser everything out they’ve thought about this why should I order underwear from a box and it just want to know how she and confident confident or are you okay or lazy
Michelle and you order these online because of Hermantown previously over there where do you shave exactly I have a reason my pants Andy.
I said that there are they good I’ve never used one you think after 3 weeks or more of a member of the Dollar Shave Club I know they haven’t sent you any favor Set Me Free said of the Dan I have a I have a box they sent to me but what am I going to do here until you come get my bible say that since we started doing the Gillette sent me a bag of AIDS but I thought
now that’s a good we should just start
my could not be the last sentence in this fucking chain me he was giving a creative will meet you at the lawsuit and Pendulum by Republicans
I’m saying that I’m not saying by sending you a raise in the mail present like demo Democratic like responsive like like flooding and money and going like yours is democratic money to repair your place that also doesn’t make it seem like Democrats didn’t fire me. I mean like if that’s your doesn’t it seem like that that effort to go I know it’s like like like yes because where the where the party that believes the charity charity but like like like like look your your place got firebombed here’s some money but that kind of does make it seem doesn’t it like
I’m not saying the people that are sending money bomb. I am drunk I don’t understand because that would be a such a fuck you move the set fire to place and then go why don’t you get yourself a new place to ya
what is over
I am not working I can give us some more music festival Bull and Australia we got to get more we going to get more explicit about the Australian I don’t want to call Australian tour are we to ring Australia or we just go to the city
City Opera house are you sure it’s already sold out Hollywood Bowl
no I made that up by fucking roads
I will support every misery you’ve got I will support every blue
I will support every sagging thing
I will support you
I will defend every dream you have
I will defend every true
I will defend every lie if I have to
I will defend you
only one person clap
I’m in love with the guy I’m not that gay but I’m in love with the guy know I’m not straight yes I’m fine
dad took down a man I’m in a restaurant I thought it was a girl but I was pleasantly surprised my curiosity was stirred I talk to what Transit do it if you told me where you were
dad sit down
for all those things
end up with there’s a nice scarafone
dad sit down
will my adolescent days are returned into my blood and my blood is filling up my veins to change the way I love you
and we were scared when I covered up on love for them I left for us was buried at the both of us feeling stuck I guess they were always there
I made him do bad things I made him be my slave then I would punish him when he misbehaved then he and I would switch cuz it was all just a game
dad sit down
for all those things to perform
there’s a nice chair up found
dance it down
well I thought that I would tell you that cuz you getting kind of old there’s not a lot of shared with you not a lot of told but now that I look in your eyes I think I may have been too bold
I will support every misery you’ve got
I will support every blue
I will support every sagging thing
I will support you
I will defend every dream you I will defend every true but I will defend every lie if I have to
I will defend I will defend that I’ll just bet that’s it down cuz I’m in love with a guy
does the Crittenden
07 topless
Andy Dick
I’ve got David Romero present message Dan Harmon
thank you all for coming drive fast take chances


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